Damaged
by Replica Velocity a.k.a. X5 714
Summary: AU, AJBAC/S2- Max made it out, Logan didn't and he has to live with the consequences. Inside of Manticore, struggling to hold onto his sanity, his identity, Logan has nowhere to hide. Will he survive to escape, or will Lydecker destroy him first? M/L
1. These Shattered Pieces

Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel…James Cameron does… and so does FOX the real world equivalent of Manticore. This started as a one shot, but it will be an ongoing story on I've want to do. This is a Logan centric, in Manticore. Max will apart from flashbacks and in this beginning piece, will not appear much until the later chapters. Pairings are undetermined. Obviously AU AJBAC and season two. Renfro, the wicked witch is dead. Read and enjoy.

**Chapter One**

These Shattered Pieces…

It was just an apartment. It still smelled like him, it still looked like Logan could walk into that room at any moment. Max half expected as she stared at the empty space by the computers that Logan would be sitting there all ready to rope her into some stupid crusade.

Logan didn't live here anymore. She was now Eyes Only, trying to keep Logan alive in some way. The apartment was just a shell. Max slept in his bed, so she could pretend behind her eyes that Zack had not come in at that moment.

That the one hopeless, messed up person in the world she needed could be there. Eleven years ago Max had escaped Manticore. Three months ago, she did it again. But a part of Max was still in there.

Because she had made a mistake, in the heat of the moment and made a fatal split second decision. Emotions running high from fighting Brin, terrified for her family she had sacrificed the other part of it. In an instant, that was all it took. For the world to fall apart.

----

"_She's clear" Logan said staring at the screen. "Detonate" He looked around, so intent on Max's fight with Brin, he had not noticed Lydecker slip out, and the detonation remote was with Lydecker. He swore and secured his headset to his radio. "Max, Zack- Lydecker's vanished, and I think we should assume he's no longer helping"_

"_Really?" Logan almost smiled at Zack's sarcasm- he had earned it. Pulling out the gun from where he had stashed it before letting Lydecker near the van, he stepped out._

_Max's reply was swift. "We'll use the secondary safe point- got it Syl, Krit?"_

"_Affirmative" Krit replied, and Logan shook his head. Lydecker really had taken them for fools. Did he think that they would not have a back up plan in place, especially knowing Deck as well as they all did?_

_The exoskeleton added a speed to his gait, and he ran through the woods. Nothing mattered but getting Max and the others out of here. Logan could figure out what happened easily- genius or not. Lydecker had used them, to set up leverage, to get him close to Renfro, so he was close enough to kill her. And to capture four rogue X5s in the deal. Lydecker's line, '__It's very gratifying watching kids realize their purpose in life.' Logan should have known better, he was Eyes Only wasn't he? People who believed what they were doing, that it was the right thing? People with conviction never changed sides._

_Logan had seen the most evil of men and had studied them. And he had failed, no he had screwed up. Logan could not blame anyone but himself. The X5s- Max may know Manticore, and Lydecker but he knew what these battles really were. He knew how these people reacted. As Eyes Only, it was how he kept the informant net from being destroyed- people killed, by studying history, examples of true evil. By knowing each and every reaction, and being able to anticipate it._

_Ahead in a clearing he could see Max, see her say something. He saw a small bald child in front of him raising a gun towards Max and Logan didn't hesitate, he fired, and the child crumpled- not a child, one of the X7… hive mind he remembered Lydecker saying. The morality of the situation disappearing with the reality of 'kill or be killed'_

"_Go ahead, I'll be right behind you" Logan smiled. "I promise"_

_Max shook her head "Come on, we have to go" _

"_Go, Krit and Syl might run into trouble" _

_Without waiting for Max he ran deeper, closer to Manticore… he had done this, he needed to save Zack, he couldn't just leave the man here. Not only was Zack Max's brother, he was someone that Logan realized he respected. Despite the attitude, and being a jerk. Max didn't fight him this time and he knew she needed to reach Syl and Krit to make sure they were okay. No longer did resentment fill him, for one family issue or another; this was his fight as much as hers. _

_Logan Cale had planned to keep his promise._

_To make it out._

Logan tried to remember a time when his existence wasn't these four walls, on the good days. He tried to remember what his name had been beyond Logan.

He couldn't. Every part of him was dead or dying and all he could remember was the woman. Warm brown eyes, he held on to her even though her name beyond 452 had deserted him a long time ago. She was his angel, the part that used to be someone else.

He fought to remember a time, a place before Manticore. From the chained bunk, Logan cried out in pain as images assaulted his mind – MISSION, DUTY, LOYALTY- images of Command that kept slamming his mind every time he gave them the chance.

The only thing obstructing his vision was the tears. In the beginning, he had tried; the old Logan had tried to stay like a wall. Colonel Lydecker had changed that- when Lydecker or bastard had changed to Colonel, Logan could not recall. Training and Psy Ops commanded Logan's days, and the part where they brought out needles was the least painful segment.

Logan could remember the scream that would come out his mouth, but it sounded like an animal's tortured cry in the wild, foreign even to him. He knew something as well as Logan… he hated Colonel Lydecker with an equal passion to his fear of the older man. Everything about him wanted, needed to rip this man apart. And something in him stopped him from doing it.

His only salvation was Zack, in this whole horror, some part of him tried to remember why he and Zack were once against, friction to each other.

Zack was the one who would curse and rage but never cry. He talked when Logan was hoarse from begging and screaming. Zack was the one who kept calling him Logan, again and again. Zack was the one who helped him survive the training. The only person he could trust. Family, in such a strong way it was one of the few things he was left sure of.

Deep down, Logan knew he was not the same man who was dragged in. The Colonel pronounced he was 'better, stronger, faster' a soldier. He had done something to him, in that chair, on that operating table. Staring at the ceiling, Logan closed his eyes and begged for sleep. For the dreams and the memories of the other Logan that haunted him.

His only release.

_**To Be Continued….**_

Completed 9/11/2008 – Edited May 9, 2009.

My heart goes out to the survivors, the victims and their families of 9/11. A tragedy I hope is never repeated.


	2. Survival of The Fittest

Disclaimer- Lets just put it this way, if I owned Dark Angel; Max Allan Collins would never have been let near writing books based on it. This fic, let's just say Logan has always been a favorite character of mine- so this is kind of something I've wanted to write. Warning if you did not realize by the first chapter this will have a very tortured Logan. Any out of character is because of the hell he went through. With the flashbacks they will be going back and forward- giving you back story in italics, as the story progresses these flashes will lessen and we will see more of Seattle.

**Chapter Two**

**Survival of the Fittest**

"_They'll never take you back Deck"_

_The look of cold amusement on Lydecker's face at her words sent a chill down Elizabeth Renfro's spine. The director studied the gun pointed at her chest with seeming disdain._

" _The committee was very interested on your side projects- how it cost them a immensely valuable X5 unit- the least in your crimes" The expression on his face, what Renfro knew Lydecker considered to be kindness- was much closer in the reality of the old saying about a rattlesnake in the grass. "Elizabeth, did you really think Command was that easily won over by your deception, underestimation is a failing"_

_She threw him a look of contempt. "And working with 'your kids', nostalgia for the sake of nostalgia" Renfro smirked. "One out of four is a failure- and you almost lost 599 as well all because of one weak paraplegic man"_

"_A man who takes his failings and changes them to success can hardly be considered weak" Lydecker answered her coldly. The door to the office opened and Brin/ X5 734 stepped in. Renfro felt a cold satisfaction. _

_Even if the committee had decided to side with the former alcoholic Colonel, the soldier before her would make sure Deck didn't get to live to enjoy his victory. 734 had never failed her-_

_Seeming to realize the X5 was standing there, Lydecker turned to Brin and she saluted. "734, execute the director"_

_Although there were no words spoken by the Korean transgenic, there was an unspoken pleasure in her eyes that only Renfro saw, inside the second before the bullet slammed into her brain. Then she didn't see anything at all._

The sounds of the guards moving down the cell corridor woke Logan up and the sound of the boots marching down the hallway was like thunder in his head. Waking up was so hard for him. For a second he felt the loss, the fear, pain- every other emotion and it was all at once. Every time.

And then there was a feeling, the feeling that he had lost something. Something important that kept slipping away. And each time it was a little harder to hold onto the actual feeling that he had lost something.

Logan was broken from his thoughts by the sound of the cell door opening. If the Colonel stepped through the door it would be the trip to hell today. Or Psy Ops.

He was relieved by the sight of the guard who seemed more interested in introducing Logan to his tazer rather than playing mad scientist with his mind.

It was all Logan could do in Psy op sessions to keep the secrets he had, partly helped by Colonel Lydecker's desire to seemingly dissect him. Psychologically and physically. And create the soldier in his place.

The relief, the positive feelings of training confused Logan to the point of crawling into a corner. He didn't want this right? He believed in freedom… right? He didn't hesitate to move out of the cell quickly. This section of Manticore's barracks was for those in isolation… mainly for minor infractions of Command. X5 494 brushed past Logan giving him a barely concealed look of amusement.

Paying it little attention Logan could see Zack moving out of the cell; it was him the guards followed around through training. The Colonel wanted his favorite to remain in condition but Zack was hardly the trusted elite soldier he was designed to be. Someone stepped up behind him, and even if her breathing did not give her away- the storm that flashed across Zack's face did.

X5 734. Behind the hands of even loyal X5s she was the Colonel's pet, and other such expressions learnt from both Common Verbal and the bad mouths of the guards. The result of too many Psy ops sessions. Logan had an involuntary chill down his spine every time, at the thought of walking to Psy ops under your own steam, and it not ripping you apart. Being that dead inside.

_You took her out of a bad situation and you let her choose for herself._The voice in his mind was a stranger, Logan didn't know him. 734 had removed her hand and walked to Zack. "There won't be a problem today 599, will there?" A statement that from anyone else would have at least had scorn, sarcasm. Nothing.

Zack's lip curled at 734 and stepped past her, holding nothing but contempt for the woman he had once viewed as a sister. The only thing Lydecker had ever said rang that true- the girl he knew didn't exist anymore.

He hated being here. Everyday was a new exercise of control, another way Lydecker could screw with him.

That bastard would not be satisfied until he was on his knees and saluting. Even the small concession of not refusing Manticore's training was the torture of giving in. Seeing that smug look of satisfaction of Lydecker's was worse than being hit by a car. But it was the difference between keeping himself sharp or spending every waking moment with an equal mix of blood and psychoactives in his veins- Lydecker would see to that. The tactical choice and one made for more than just him.

Without him, there would be nothing to keep Logan from becoming the one thing that would break Max and more importantly his former self.

Logan Cale was here because he had thrown everything to the wind to help them. Zack didn't dwell on that night much, it was a sentimental flaw to think about what could have been- but it was a strategically beneficial advantage to see your mistakes.

_Zack lay in the foliage, the blood from the shoulder wound trickling down his chest. He checked his clip, empty- he had used his final bullets on the X7 clones. A choice he had made with no qualms, shooting down mirror versions of Jondy, Krit even him. As he heard the cracking of foliage he held tightly onto the rifle prepared the crack his opponent's skull apart._

_The sounds of the gears made Zack relax slightly. Slightly. The second Logan appeared, Zack had already flipped up and pinned him into the tree "Are you that deficient or just insane- what – are- you – doing?" he demanded._

_The other man shrugged "And here I planned it making sure you got out" Logan's voice was laced with subtle sarcasm. _

_Zack looked at the older man, analyzing everything. There was the smell of gun powder, and … blood- he hadn't known that Eyes Only could kill. "An emotionally driven decision- a mistake" But there was a glimmer of something damn near respect in his eyes. He let him go and then his eyes focused on ahead. The TAC unit edging forward to surround them. _

"_Stay here" Zack muttered. As he pushed Logan back ripping out the blade he had kept in his boot throwing it hard at the first soldier, and ripping the soldier's gun from his still falling corpse._

_Logan forced him himself to look away and there out of a jeep not hundred meters' away was Lydecker stepping out. The man was clearly confident he had enough men there to take Zack down. If they could just get that hummer and use it, they could get out of here without getting killed or caught. _

_Aiming the gun forward once again Logan stepped out of the brush and into view. The soldier who had been driving brought up his rifle and with bile in his throat Logan fired. "You know I think I said something to Max" Logan spoke calmly, ignoring the horrific feeling within him. "About not trusting you, about taking you out…down on the ground" The order was given with false confidence. Logan was no soldier, he was just fighting to make it out of here, to stop these bad guys._

_Lydecker didn't move to the ground in fact, he seemed almost peaceful of the situation. "You won't shoot me son," Again Logan felt sick, like he had earlier when Lydecker had talked to him about his feelings. "I'm unarmed… 'Eyes Only'- and if I'm not mistaken about you, you shoot in defense, in the heat of the moment, your admirable qualities are only weakened by your emotions"_

_The man had an instinctual ability to get under his skin. " I would not be so sure Lydecker- Max almost died tonight because of the power play you threw into the works" Even with his words Logan knew he could never pull the trigger on a defenseless man no matter how evil he was. What separated him- but he tried, his hands shaking now but his aim never wavering. _

_He glanced back at Zack, as the TACs threatened to overwhelm him. Logan yelled a warning and almost missed the soldier emerging behind Lydecker who shot rounds into the side of the exoskeleton. As the device short circuited, Logan fell to the ground. He reached down and felt blood. One of the bullets had hit his leg- but that wasn't the worse part. The exoskeleton was dead. Logan realized he was becoming light headed- he must be losing more blood than he realized and the thought barely cohesive as he passed out. _

_Two X5s were dragging a restrained Zack forward, and Lydecker regarded him with clear disappointment. Zack didn't know why but he started to laugh._

His body slammed into the mat and Logan felt frustration inside, burning. 'Biggs' as the other transgenics called him/ X5 846 leaned down. "You know- if I always win there really is no fun part"

Sparring was hell in itself, he was as strong as them, now made to be 'better', to be a weapon… a killer as an echo in his mind would whisper into his ear. The voice grew fainter every day, almost like it had never been there. And the other voice wanted to be the superior soldier, Colonel Lydecker's voice, drilling into his brain.

But twenty years of training took more than the month and a half he had been out of Psy Ops medical division. And Logan hated the part of him that need to be superior, the part that wouldn't let him go; it weakened his grip on his hold of who he used to be. The war that was between himself, within and out against Manticore.

That part, that Logan was fighting, caught 846's next blow and kicked hard into his chest, avoiding the returning blow- almost inhuman as he pulled the transgenic towards a choke hold.

What was he doing?

Logan paused when he should have pressed his advantage and Biggs pinned him to the ground.

He could barely hear the comment out of Biggs over the rush of blood in his ears. He had almost let the Colonel's voice in his mind win. It was all he could do to keep from screaming- but if he did the guards would drag him straight to Colonel Lydecker. He took in a shuddering breath.

Biggs just walked past as the TAC commander signaled to disengage from the sparring. Logan almost jumped at the hand in front of him, as Zack helped him up. "You got through the session so don't give it up now"

The words sounded harsh and unfeeling, but they weren't so much. They helped Logan focus, and drown out the mind altering programming if only for a moment. He looked at Zack's sparring partner, 734 was sporting as many marks as Zack had. She did not seem pleased by this in the least.

"That was disappointing soldiers- I expected more- next time if I do not see an improvement you will be here at 0300 practicing how not to be a disgrace to your unit and this Command until I am satisfied- am I UNDERSTOOD" The instructor yelled that last past.

"YES SIR!" Logan wished he could have fought against speaking with the other soldiers, like Zack who had mimed the words but nothing had come out. But he hadn't gotten a chance to think about it, the programming, his voice worked before his mind did.

As the unit moved forward, Logan found himself hearing part of a conversation.

"So you ran into 452?"

X5 494 had been absent from the last three days, partly due to an assignment. Logan's heart raced, as his mind visualized her. Strong, defiant, a fast word on her lips- really seeing him instead of the chair. The wheelchair always elicited, couldn't forget it, the feelings of guilt- he had wanted to walk- to be a whole person, and Manticore knew it. Had used it against him at every turn, as if it should be reason enough to give in. All because they made him whole, then had shattered him in ways even worse than being unable to walk.

"Yep" 494 flaunted the language he learnt in Common Verbal often. It seemed to be a symbol of pride. "She's not bad looking if you ignore the whole traitor crawling in the garbage part"

Logan tensed, the part of him that didn't weaken was this need, to protect and defend 452.

494 continued his recollection. "Get this, 452 had some ordinary watching her back… probably smarter than her, her loss- lame nickname, Bling- the techs are trying an ID no luck so far" 494 shook his head. "I did all the work- and they can't get a hit with the actual body because 452 has to have a necro fetish"

He knew the name; something in him knew the name, and all Logan could feel was a dark anger rising inside of him. And the feeling of Zack's death grip that stopped him from reacting to this confusing desire to punch 494 and just keep hitting until he stopped moving, the weird feeling of loss that was ripping through him.

Zack knew exactly what they were talking about. Apart from the initial annoyance that Max had been drawn into another fight. And the fact she was still staying in Seattle. It worried him, 494, the shallow, arrogant soldier that he was, was still that a soldier and a damn good one. A 2IC, that apart from some incident that no one discussed was very good at what he did. Lydecker was learning from his mistakes, and actually using transgenics against her. One who looked just like Ben.

He knew she had still felt guilt over Ben's death when they were attempting to take down Manticore. It was unlikely to have changed and despite the fact that Max did what needed to be done he doubted his headstrong sister would ever see it that way. He held onto Logan knowing the moment would pass. Even if he hadn't cared about Logan, he was the only person in this place Zack could trust- Zack did care about him in his own way.

And keeping Logan from attacking 494, and being thrown at the mercy of Psy ops was necessary even if X5 494 deserve to be bleeding and broken on the floor.

'_**This is a streaming freedom video bulletin. The cable hack will last exactly 60 seconds. It cannot be traced, it cannot be stopped and it is the only free voice left in the city**_**.** _**…' **__The broadcast seemed the same, but somehow it wasn't, it seemed darker almost. __**' Despite Seattle police saying that psychoactive class dugs experimentation and trafficking is urban legend this is a lie. The images you see are of just one such lab. These drugs are designed and then sold to many black op military agencies. These clandestine labs are murdering anyone who threatens their exposure. They believe they are above repercussions. But they are not above us, and will be held accountable for their actions. This has been a streaming freedom video bulletin...via the Eyes Only informant net. Peace...out. **_

Studying the video of the Seattle broadcast, Lydecker knew the synthesized voice well. It was Logan Cale's although it was clear that 452 was using Eyes Only to continue her 'lovers' fight, and to fight Manticore. Finding her was proving a challenge. Logan Cale- had been smarter than most people, his listed apartment was vacant- and the computer system in Seattle had been wiped clean by a computer virus less than 12 hours after Cale's capture.

His family had vanished in all likelihood dead, another thing to attribute to Renfro's disastrous side projects. While the concept of the programmed-to-kill hover drone was promising it was too easy a system to compromise. Sandoval demonstrated that.

Perhaps it was Logan Cale's intelligence and spirit that fought so hard against the Manticore programming. It was not in the nature of the former Eyes Only to give in. Lydecker knew that it was a long process which was why 452's capture would have a dual affect. Out there , she may dismiss the recordings Lydecker sent to the informant net, to show her the price of what she was doing.

In here, forced to watch it all, it would break her, make her the soldier he wanted that much faster. It would break Logan Cale completely, his feelings for 452 were his greatest strength and weakness. Stopping the tape, Lydecker stood from his chair and stared at the photographs. What happened to Tinga was a deep regret. Renfro's power play had cost him one of his kids, and it was a curiosity why it had not happened before. It reiterated the truth - they didn't belong out there. And he needed to do whatever it took to being them home.

_Max could not go back to her apartment. Not tonight. She couldn't face explaining why she looked like someone had shot her in the heart to Original Cindy. Being shot would be easier than dealing with this. She had been so wrecked she had fallen asleep at some point in the back up van while Syl drove._

_She had closed her eyes, just to avoid that look of pity in Krit's eyes. And the dream she had, was torturous to the point of hell. Making it out- with everybody. Lydecker not screwing them all over, Manticore going down and going to Crash to celebrate._

_Her family being with her friends, the best of both worlds. Zack telling her he approved of Logan. Leading Logan out of Crash, and going back to his apartment. More than touching, being with him and leading him to the bedroom._

_In the starting of 'happily ever after', then she heard it. _

_Saw that horrible black creature, the crow. Heard its call and she stared to Logan who seemed to be fading into thin air. Like he didn't exist anymore. Max couldn't hear him speak, but she could read the words on his lips._

'_I'm sorry'_

_She woke with a start, and saw look of worry on her brother's face. She had been asleep for mere moments. Just long enough to be put through the happily-ever-after she was not getting._

_Now laying on the lounge in Logan's apartment, Max couldn't move. She could barely breathe. This was not how it was supposed to end. This was not supposed to happen to him. The choice to stop running had been hers- not his. And Max had thrown it away… it should have been her. _

_They were her consequences and Logan was taking her fall._

_Logan 'and' Zack. Zack was facing Psy ops again, and all because of her. This was on Max Guevara. If Max could turn back time and be shot dead by her X7 mirror she would. Anything to escape this moment… of being here without him. _

---_To be Continued--------------------------------_

Done and updated a week later- see reviews really do make the difference. Want me to update regularly? You see the button… give it a push, it make it happy too. It encourages me while story alerts without reviews do not. It also tells me what parts you like, and what to include.

If there was a song that fits this story it'd be 'What I've Done' by Nickelback.

Completed 9/17/2008. Story edit May 9, 2009.


	3. The Reprogramming of Eyes Only

Disclaimer: I don't own it. Let's just leave that fact as that. I realized I had not mentioned something very important while there is obvious ML in the way of flash backs, thoughts and feelings that's what it will remain. This while having the relationship of the show will not be a shipper type story... Sorry for the delay guys, I got really sick…and believe me it's hard to type when the sight of a computer screen makes your head ache and you can barely breathe between coughing fits it's hard to type.

**Chapter Three**

**The Reprogramming of Eyes Only**

Up, down. Up. Down. If Logan could focus on the substance he was pushing into his mouth, he would realize it had no taste. But that was unimportant, his eyes darting across the mess hall to all other soldiers doing the exact same thing. Assimilation into this command was what the Colonel called it. Another way to get him to see the other soldiers as teammates, and that they were all on the same side.

They weren't. Zack would drill that into him at every moment, if a hand during a field exercise, or a warning during live ordinance drill lulled him into feeling that way… everyone here but Zack was the enemy. And all the X5 soldiers were trying to do was to try to find a way in.

Any one of them would report straight to Command at the first hint of rebellion or escape. Their every movement was reported back to be used against them.

They needed to stay sharp for something Logan could barely call more than a concept. Escape. It was something that stirred something inside, the feeling, the hope he could leave.

A single mistake by a guard, or the opening and that would be all they would need. The hope was nothing compared to the fear.

The fear Logan had of getting that far and failing. The fear of getting that close to being able to regain something real in his life, the outside world and it being taken away. Of being dragged down that dark hall, beyond Manticore's subbasements. Of being strapped down and powerless to stop them ripping out what was left and destroying him permanently.

A noise made Logan turn his head, and he could see Zack staring at the same time while most just pretended like nothing was happening.

A sergeant was yelling at an X6 as Colonel Lydecker stared on. "How have your actions done anything but undermine the Command you must obey- your orders and mission perimeters are decided by your superior officers- not YOU" the X6 swallowed and Logan felt something he couldn't name for the transgenic. Something that should make him stand up right that second and go over there despite the guards who would stop him.

Logan just felt like he should do something. This transgenic soldier, the boy who couldn't be more than seventeen hadn't done anything wrong. He had just chosen not to take collateral damage during a mission. Saved people.

"Stand up" Logan muttered to himself. Instead he turned away from the scene and Zack could just see the struggle across Logan's face even if his face was turned the other way. The struggle if anyone was watching would show just how much humanity Logan still had despite everything.

The X6 was dragged away, probably headed for Psy Ops and Lydecker walked out after him not before looking directly at them. Zack felt defiance close to the surface and he kept his face like stone. Untouched, emotionless. Finally Zack noticed the glimmer of satisfaction on Lydecker's face as he turned and left.

Zack looked at Logan. "You were right not to say anything" he said barely audible his lips more moving, the former Eyes Only just picked up his utensil and resumed the motion.

_Coming to, Logan had to blink his eyes several times before he could see anything his vision still blurred. For the moment he was disorientated and reached for his glasses, then he felt a yank on the side and his vision could barely make out the glimmer of the handcuff. The events of the previous night came rushing back to him and with some weird stabbing pains down his…legs?_

_He could hear his own breathing, which had quickened and Logan closed his eyes a few times trying to get his vision clearer. A blurred figure moved forward and Logan felt the metal of his glasses being slipped on. He moved, or rather attempted to move away as Lydecker stood back. "You realize this is a violation of my constitutional rights"_

_Logan's words did not seem to deter the Manticore commander. "Constitutional rights, if I recall your news broadcasts correctly no longer exist- intelligent words" _

"_I won't tell you where Max is" Logan met Lydecker's gaze of steel with his own. "So if this is what it's about you'd be wasting your time" _

"_That will change" Lydecker spoke with assurance, but then this was not a petty criminal with everything to lose. This was a man who right at this moment held the higher ground in every sense of the word. "Now I know who you are Mr. Cale I can see it was your interference of radio communication at Seedrow Island" _

_And there was that atmosphere… that feeling when the words had changed from deceived to 'who was this'. And unlike last time the smile that crossed Logan's face was more from what he had accomplished than actual amusement. "It was easy-for a covert operation your radio chatter was surprisingly easy to break into"_

_Even with that there was still no reaction - not even the look of defeat, of failing. The free voice of Seattle had a feeling that the day the Pulse hit, that the man had just treated it like a status change, rather than the disaster that it was. _

_In fact Logan remembered exactly how Max had told him, how the 'antichrist' viewed the event that had turned America into the nightmare it was today as having a positive affect._

_Another reason the man was a monster as much as a human being could be. "Not just anyone could have accomplished what you have" Lydecker regarded the spasm in Logan's lower body. "Potential which will be used"_

"_Used?" Logan asked, a bad feeling springing up. _

"_As a part of Manticore you will become a soldier, in part a credit to Dr. Hathaway" At Logan's blank expression, he went on. "You know her by her alias – Vertes"_

_Logan scoffed. "The woman you murdered"_

"_452 would not have been affected by my actions, if I had not eliminated the doctor she would have, it's in her training- did you think that Dr. 'Vertes' would have settled for financial aid in return for aiding your recovery-452 was mistrusting was she not?" _

"_Her name is Max" Logan refused to react, to give Lydecker the satisfaction of knowing he had predicted Max, that he still had a pull in her life. _

"_If 'Vertes had wanted financial security and protection she could have gone overseas , sold her intel to the highest bidder- instead she was working on a project to return to Manticore" _

"_Return to Manticore…?" If Logan had not felt bad enough about not telling Max to begin with, this made it worse. He had taken her at face value- how many 'innocent' people who claimed to be in the wrong place turned out to be the ones causing the problem._

"_Vertes was on the wrong side of Renfro- and she had become redundant with some gifted recruits with new advances in genetic research, she no longer brought anything new to the program" Lydecker was looking to an open file that Logan couldn't quite see._

"_Adriana was working on a technique to augment humans- as a way to compliment our forces without the inevitable flaws- this technique rarely worked more often causing complications except in certain individuals who already were distinguished by a rare blood type" The direct stare seemed to be seeing into him and Logan had to resist the urge to shudder. "She didn't just offer 452 and her sister, she offered the project's crucial key- the only mistake was Adriana overestimated her own value- my error was not getting the information on it before the source was destroyed" One thing to say about Lydecker was that he did admit his own failings. Another was that human life meant very little if it got in the way of the objective._

_He pulled a sheet off the file's binding, and turned it to Logan's view. "You know" Logan said, a slight smile on his face. "I never majored in science so you'll forgive me if I have no idea what it means"_

" _It's your value to Manticore, your value beyond the information you could provide- you are completely compatible for this experiment- this will further the soldier initiative- but this is much more than just making a soldier to match the X5s" Lydecker leaned forward, staring into the younger man's face. "You were not born a soldier like 452, but you are one, many after the Pulse were weak, but it strengthened you but your holding back- Eyes Only rarely exacts physical action despite his sway- when it would be much more efficient to eliminate your targets, to make changes using whatever means necessary"_

_Logan stared resolutely at Lydecker matching his stare "I have a conscience and believe that if America can ever return to some semblance of the good it stood for, it won't be by actions without moral compass" and Logan went further to argue is point despite knowing it was in vain. It was just who Logan was "Manticore is worse than anything that has happened after the Pulse- its evil, the military playing God even before this country fell apart" _

"_That's not for you to decide, neither is it for your conscience" Lydecker moved away towards the door. "You are going to become a soldier Mr. Cale"_

"_I'll fight you" Logan said, he had stared into the eyes of immoral monsters like Gerhardt Bronk or his own relatives. And he didn't give in. The stakes being his life, or something worse didn't change the truth- Logan Cale wasn't just Eyes Only because he had exceptional computer skills. Because he truly believed in trying to make the world better despite everything. Bruno Anselmo had taken Logan's legs, but not who he was._

"_734 said as much" Lydecker wasn't one for listening past saying his piece. 'Efficiency', Logan thought with disgust. Nearly as much disgust as he felt for himself, for that spark of hope that came with feeling his legs again._

The first time Logan had set eyes on the forest it had felt like freedom was a heartbeat away. He remembered that feeling that intense hope driving him. Zack, who had been wary when the guards had withdrawn, had decided with quick words hissed into Logan's ear to take the chance.

They didn't even get close to the fence. The X7s were all the guard against escape through the forest Manticore needed.

They seized on them the second they attempted it- and to make it more unsettling unlike the night of the failed attempt on the DNA lab all these X7s looked alike.

So now Logan could see the forest ahead of them for what it was- just another training area and just another control measure. This particular session was 'hunt down and retrieve' a prisoner that had been released into the forest area.

As he followed Biggs's back into the forest he didn't turn. Colonel Lydecker was supervising this training session. It had been enough that he had demanded Zack's designation. Zack had spat it out, a vein bulging close to the surface as the X5 clearly struggled to keep him self from trying to break Colonel Lydecker's neck. For whatever reason the Manticore commander was here, the only one who had seemed to be pleased was 734 (if she was capable of showing emotions). She was in command of the unit for the exercise.

Logan felt the ghost of a smile as Biggs mouthed something to 494, pointing towards the Colonel's pet. Most of the transgenics seemed excited, almost to enjoy this exercise now they were out of the view of the Colonel- with the exception of Zack who seemed to look as disgusted at this as he was over Colonel Lydecker's presence.

A memory that Logan could not quite recall flitted just behind his eyes… something that was making him feel grave apprehension about this scenario.

Ahead 734 sent the signal to surround and Logan could here it too and see it a head, slightly through the foliage. Their target was crawling up a tree, in an attempt to scout the area. His fear was tangible when the X5s and Logan surrounded the base of the tree, and spread out to prevent him from escaping. Manticore often acquired these prisoners in lots and, some prisoners would be cells for days watching their fellow death row inmates disappear or return to their prison for immediate execution- and hear stories about what these 'special' soldiers would do to them.

One of the female transgenics Cece/ X5 581 leapt to the branch and swung her legs in a sliding motion pushing the prisoner to the ground, dropping down a heartbeat later herself. Following her lead, 494 smirked, pulling hand cuffs off his side. Then grabbing one of the prisoner's arms, the soldier pinned him against the tree. "Too easy…" 494 muttered, almost disappointed and then unexpectedly 734 pulled 494 away. He looked at her. "Our orders are to bring him in, are your brains a little too scrambled today?"

734 had no emotional reaction to that remark. "Colonel Lydecker has a secondary objective" She pulled her gun off her side and turned towards Logan. Logan felt that bad feeling grow worse and he could see in the corner of his eye Zack tense up.

She walked right up to him. 734 addressed Logan by a designation but it was as if the sound was turned off for that instant. Somehow Logan could never hear it, only his own name like a mantra in his head. "'Your' objective is to take the target out"

The cold metal of the gun was pushed into Logan's hand, which felt as if it was suddenly heavy and sluggish.

_All I had to do was let it happen and I could cross Donald Lydecker off my list of things to worry about… but for some reason I couldn't let it happen and I have no idea why._

_Life good, murder bad? _

The thoughts were crystal clear for once, 452's and his own overriding whatever training had been instilled in him. Logan felt his head, clearer than it had been all day and he looked at 734, summoning what strength he could to keep that clarity. "No"

734 stepped right up to his face and in the background he could hear Zack use his name- more of a warning as to what was going to happen. "That was a direct order- eliminate this man"

Logan stared at her; his eyes seemed to have less steel within them. "No… Brin" He had no idea where the name had come from, it had come to his lips as naturally as breathing. That elicited a reaction from the rest of the unit- almost more supportive of Logan than that of the Colonel's orders- or maybe that was just the disdain for 734 showing up.

"Understood" 734 said calmly, taking the gun and walked to where the prisoner was being held and snapped his neck. She pulled out her radio. "Move in" Within minutes TACs had approached their position. Logan felt him arms cuffed behind his back and from the clearing Colonel Lydecker emerged.

Zack's first instinct was to help Logan but he stopped himself, partially because of the look that 494 sent him. It was a look urging for restraint and Zack knew the reasoning easily- emotions could easily become a weakness. If he reacted in rage and attacked Lydecker- he'd by hauled to Psy Ops as well. There he couldn't help anybody. Zack merely nodded letting 494 know he understood.

Seeming to dismiss Logan out of hand, Colonel Lydecker looked at the TACs and then he turned to 734 instead. "Escort him to Psy Ops soldier" 734 saluted and there was very little Logan could do to fight being dragged away towards Manticore.

---

There was barely a dent, and Zack glared. He took his frustrations often out on the cell and it did make small marks…but right now Zack wanted to cause damage. It had all been a set up- Logan did as he was ordered and he was one step closer to ceasing to be Logan, and if he refused off to Psy Ops to be made to be the soldier- the no win situation. He didn't even turn when the door to his cell opened. "You realize if Lydecker figured out you bribed the guards they would all be killed" he said turning around finally.

494 shrugged leaning against the wall. 'Hey, they live a high risk job that's not my fault" At this Zack scoffed. Most of the time Zack wanted to smash that arrogant smirk off the transgenics face or at the least put that ego in the right place. The other half, he felt guilt over Ben's fate… if only he had found his brother sooner then maybe Ben would have gotten help before it was too late. "I'm actually impressed- your friend seems to be holding on well, for a former ordinary"

"And you are here to say that 494?" Zack asked bluntly.

"You know what your sister, the fine traitor 452 calls me when we have our 'encounters' " Coming from 494, it sounded dirty." 'Alec'- you should use it" There was that smirk, again.

Zack wore a grim smile. "I doubt that was her first suggestion 'Alec' " And the smirk seemed to slide right off. In half a moment Zack had already figured out why she had picked 'Alec' - smart aleck, Max erred on the predictable at times...

"This doesn't have to be hard on him" Alec said, getting off the wall. "If you just suggested he cooperated… Psy ops would be a hell of a lot easier"

"You mean hand Lydecker my unit- I don't think so" Zack struggled to keep the confrontational tone out of his voice. Alienating Alec/494 was not good op sec. The soldier may prove useful to him. "Fighting Manticore is his nature"

Alec's hazel eyes grew dark and he went to leave. But he paused for a moment. "Fighting Manticore was your sister's nature too- 734… she fought so hard that Psy Ops made sure to destroy every last part of her in the process… they will do the same to him and once again it will be only your fault.. _Zack_" Alec said, leaving Zack to his thoughts.

---

A small part of Logan raced with fear as the technician approached with the needle and as the cold metal pieced his skin he involuntarily winced not at the pain, but a subconscious reaction towards the need. 'He' noticed it. Colonel Lydecker from his vantage point opposite. He raised a hand, stopping the Psy op tech from pushing the plunger down leaving the needle in precarious position in his arm.

"If you had taken your objective out, this would be unnecessary" The Colonel nodded to the technician and liquid fire raced through Logan's veins starting from his arm.

_Please, oh god- just let this END!!!_

For a second, a perfect, horrifying second he was himself. And in that second Logan Cale the fading prisoner in his own mind, fading away silent, begged to die.

--------_To be Continued…---------------_

Sorry for the delay… really I am sorry. But hey nice juicy chapter and I will try to update faster I do love writing this story.

-Allison

Chapter Completed: 12/2/08 Chapter Edited: 20/5/09


	4. Not Alone In Here

Disclaimer: Don't own it. If I did, there would be no certain network able to hold it over our heads now would there? I have a real affection for this fic and do not plan to abandon it, despite time between updates being long at times. I am really sorry for the delay- well my computer (that I called Abby) decided it was going to go into death throes. So just retrieving all my stuff turned into a painfully long experience. Then I learnt of root kits the hard way. People these things disable your anti virus and royally screw with your computer- so watch out. God what is it every time I go to write something comes up- stupid real life.

This chapter is more of a direct continue on from the last chapter.

**

* * *

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**Chapter Four**

**Not Alone in Here**

* * *

Biggs moved out of sight as he heard the metal door from the other side of cell corridor open. He had traded that morphine vial from Manticore's infirmary store and those were hard to grab, for this pack of cigarettes. He didn't need them confiscated and then to get reported for contraband.

From his vantage point, Biggs winced as they half carried Logan towards his cell. It brought back the horrible feeling of being scared for his brother after the failed Berrisford assignment. The shattered look that had been across Alec's face every time even before Psy Ops.

And Biggs could remember how far back it had set his brother. His once well mannered humor turned sarcastic and it had taken Alec until just recently his entire life and a traitor to get him to pick a name. The family ties that Manticore had tried to erase after the 09 escape- in some units they had been successful and in others? Nothing could be further from reality.

Still Biggs couldn't help despite the man's origins to feel worried for Logan and he groaned silently as the guards moved away after locking the cell door. This was sappy, down right sappy. At least it wasn't compassion for a traitor- this man was in here because of the merry little traitors.

_Damn it!_

Biggs moved further backwards as Lydecker emerged from the other end of the hallway with 734. She could be cute if anything was going on it that head. Empty space right between the ears. And that was nothing compared to the Colonel's plans for X5 452… the girl had seriously gotten under the commander's skin from what Kye- one of the less talented psy op transgenics had told him. 452 was going to get a unique ride of Psy Ops.

Lydecker and his drone X5 walked to Zack's cell, and a smile spread across Biggs's features. This should be good.

A guard opened the cell door and 734 walked in. The soldiers never went in- Lydecker's orders. 599 seemed to be immune from the full treatment so far- mainly because Lydecker would lose all the information he needed- Zack being the key. The psychological reports said it would conceivably take a year- two. The 09 escapees had never been the discussed item like they had the last few months by the instructors and their re indoctrination was drilled into every X5. Command wanted everyone to know the price of disobeying orders.

And Manticore was finally closing in. Biggs was drawn out of his thoughts as 734 finally dragged Zack out of his cell, and she was sporting one nasty mark across her face. She was also supporting her left leg strongly. Served her right.

"You only make this harder on yourself Zack" Biggs frowned at the interaction between 599 and the Colonel. It was always debated about why Lydecker called the 09 unit by the names and the designations. But they were Colonel Lydecker's personal unit- the unit of the C/O of Manticore. Special. Biggs was glad he wasn't special- special seemed to mean excessive psy ops and extra attention from Lydecker. No thanks.

The 09 commander sneered at Lydecker but didn't say a word. Zack was refusing to rise to the reprimand- even not meeting his eye exactly as if Lydecker was beneath notice: a battle of wills. Zack was actually looking past him.

Biggs almost gave away his position as he felt breath on the back of his neck. He turned- seeing Alec- and completely missed whatever Lydecker's reaction had been as the Colonel had the X5 dragged out of the corridor.

"What was that?" Biggs snapped in an almost whisper.

"You mean- what were you doing, if the Colonel had seen you he would be taking you there instead" Alec was furious. Renfro and Sandoval had let some things slide- or at least not been as vigilant - Lydecker was. And there seemed to be no sign of the Command sending their unit to another base.

They had been transferred here mere hours after Director Renfro had assumed control here- as had several other units from the original Manticore facility she commanded. Lydecker had sent most of them back to the Manticore base in the Nevada desert. Except for theirs.

Biggs snorted. "And what are you doing here?"

"Something I can't if you stick around" Alec hated the look that passed over his 'brother'- the look of pity. He glared stoically until Biggs left- thankful that he didn't try to pat him on the shoulder. Alec would have put him through the wall. He wasn't weak- damaged or anything else. He had ruined the mission. Gotten someone he cared about killed. And he could never tell anyone the truth. If he could do it over, Alec would have broken in the previous night and forced Rachel and her father into hiding. Berrisford would have kept silent not willing to risk his daughter, and Manticore and Rachel would have been safe. Manticore was right- Alec had screwed up. Just not in the way they thought he had.

Alec stepped up to the cell door. Jones was on tonight and the guy liked to smoke almost as much as Biggs. You could time when he'd be off duty. Unlocking the door and throwing the bolt- Alec stepped in. The man was sitting in the corner, muttering under his breath. Almost a chant- it took a moment for him to realize what he was saying. His name. Over, and over, and over again and holding onto it like it was a lifesaver.

"Logan"

Logan looked up- and Alec could see the red in his eyes. See the sweat of the skin, the widened pupils- and every single hallmark of the drugs were still recycling out of his body. "Get away from me" he spat and Alec was taken aback.

"Why?" Alec asked shrewdly.

"You go after 452- you killed him- when I was in the chair he helped keep me from falling apart- and he was nothing- just something you accomplished…to hurt her "Logan couldn't bring facts up- and Alec had no doubt he was speaking to everything Logan could muster up within his shattered mind. And Alec couldn't bring himself to manipulate Logan into revealing who the man had been.

"Your girl's something" Alec said soothingly. "You know how much she cares about you- seems the type that would kick your ass if she could see you like this" A smile- the mind changing tracks even though there were no words and Alec almost felt guilty. He was in essence still manipulating him. Instead of information- it was trust. "So tell me- what is up with 452 and that bike of hers?"

Almost being the word. This was for the former cyber-journalist's own good. Zack was going to let Logan destroy himself in the process on resisting. Too many had paid for what the 09'ers had done already.

---

He could still remember what a hangover felt like. Logan sat up- surprised almost to find he had not

been asleep on the floor. That was what usually happened after the routine mind dissection and Logan almost dug his nails into his palm as he tried to remember.

It was painful- to his mind to try and sort it all out and Logan felt as if he was trying to catch sand with his bare hands. But he felt the small sense of victory still even if it had led to this. He hadn't taken that life. His own simple moral victory and that was enough for now.

The cell door remained closed for almost an hour after they usually escorted him to training and Logan dimly remembered some exercise – mission that Manticore had assigned unit five to- some illegal operation that was selling military secrets. Neutralize was the watchword – but the true meaning was get the information and kill everyone involved. Scorch the place behind them.

Running a hand over his mouth, Logan realized he had never been lucid enough- or had the time to stare at his cell in much detail. Mainly there was the bunk that could be moved up by a simple chain, underneath were the boots with the polish. Logan felt ridiculous on his knees as he stared under the bunk and he almost sat up.

There was a small notebook wedged in such a position if you lifted this up it would be difficult to next to impossible to see. After a moment of pulling it loose, Logan moved to sit on the bunk – his hand reaching for the glasses that he no longer needed. And weren't there.

_They leave me alone just long enough to mock me for my cowardice. I see the others sometimes in my head- mocking me for it. They use our twins against me. They do it to Zack too- I've seen him a few times. They use Max against him. He says we will get out of this… at first I thought with him here- the supreme jerk would leave me alone. But I didn't count on Miss Ice Queen- she turns up all the time. Fricking blue lady, – she's almost worse than Eva's killer. She looks at even her loyal little pod people as if they are tools 'meat ' she calls us- transgenics. There must be a pre requisite rule to start working here- no personality allowed. Zack says he'll get us out of here and-_

Logan looked away from the page- not because he wanted to stop, but because he needed to. He knew who this was now. If he didn't know Colonel Lydecker he would think this was all a coincidence. To Colonel Lydecker this must be sending a message. And Logan knew it wasn't for him.

He knew how much Zack blamed himself for what had happened to Brin- and he wondered how many times in Zack's own psy op sessions the Colonel pointed it out.

He looked at her name a few times but it was as if the word was something his mind couldn't process and it just kept putting 452 in its place.

Logan went back wards in the book. He had to be careful- the pages were water damaged and stiff from being jammed in hiding.

…_down there are the nomilies. They aren't really nomilies- after all Ben was a few screws loose up there. My plan was to break out through down here but there are some damn creepy kids in those woods…_

It became a pattern- read entries looking for clues to how Brin was able to escape this cell. Eventually Brin mentioned it. Part of the brick wall under the bunk were all loose bricks that unless you gave a good kick- you wouldn't know they could come out. But they could, and the jigsaw pattern of it blended with the wall.

It was almost unbearable to wait for the day to pass- letting him out of his cell twice, once to be checked over medically by a Manticore technician, the second to go to the mess hall. Somehow Logan felt more alive than he usually did after psy ops and he rationalized it as- he was finally doing something instead of just being controlled. And it felt right to be fighting it- like something he was before they started playing with his mind.

As the light flickered off in all the cells, Logan quickly moved the bricks out of the way and placed them under the covers. The hole was a tight fit- after all Brin was smaller than he was but he managed to slip through into the small passage that ran the back of the cells. He edged along quietly and found it rise slightly to the junction Brin mentioned. At this point- Logan slipped down a small metal ladder; the side of passage ran along psy ops. And he had no desire to watch what Lydecker was doing to Zack.

This was the area of subbasements underneath even Psy Ops. And where the 'nomilies' were, Manticore's mistakes when making the perfect soldier. Logan wondered how often the guards walked through here as a rat squeaked past him. A low growl sounded from the shadows and Logan found himself being pushed against the wall by what first appeared to be a man with long shaggy hair who was barking. Then he saw his face. Like someone had somehow tried to make an image from a man and a dog- and the result was a lion type face.

_They don't feed 'em often down here. One of them Joshua- pretty much has free range skulking down here taking care of them. Sweet but makes me crawl inside- it's not his fault- more like a cat /dog thing._

"Joshua?"

The dog-man paused. "How do you know Joshua- Joshua not upstairs?"

The journal had said he could speak but Logan was still- taken aback by the fact he could. Logan swallowed. "Brin did"

Joshua backed up looking at Logan, still uneasy but calming down. "Brin upstairs people, nice always nice to me- she doesn't visit anymore- they hurt her" he sniffed. "You upstairs person – not so much cat in your cocktail"

"No" The fact Joshua- could smell any at all gave Logan a clue to how much the Manticore doctors had been playing.... it frustrated him to know the name/reference escaped him- but they _had_ been playing with his genetics. "They made me… different to what I used to be" Logan gave a small smile. "I'm Logan"

Joshua titled his head. "No numbers- they make Brin into numbers, make her sad" the transgenic gave a small low howl at the thought.

"I'm not numbers" Logan ignored the silent 'yet' that hissed into his mind.

"Did Father name you?"

Logan frowned, feeling a sick twisted feeling he couldn't place. "You don't mean Colonel Lydecker, do you?" The growl and jerk of the head answered Logan's question. Most of the pages about Joshua early on were damaged beyond reading and later entries got disjointed. And then at some point they had stopped.

"My own …. 'Father' did" Logan frowned, as he tried to recall the man and realized in fear he couldn't remember his father's face.

Moving closer, Joshua frowned. "Guards hurt you?"

"Only when they get told to" He knew that the only room with a window here was barred- and knew it only led to the forest. And the X7s. Logan frowned. "Is there anything they leave down here- computer… a machine with a screen and box?"

Joshua then took off down the corridor and Logan followed him. Many of the shrieks from the other transgenics down here told Logan that a lot of them weren't as Joshua was. After everything he'd been through- Logan didn't blame them for it. He blamed this place.

Joshua opened what had been a storage closet and Logan stepped in, and pulled on a light hesitantly. Old broken computer components- hard drives, monitors - all just shoved on top of each other. He felt a genuine smile on his face. He could build a computer from this- a way to tap into the mainframe… to be inside every piece of information they had. He could actually help Zack- instead of be someone who needed to be carried. Somehow what was left of his pride refused it.

"This will help?" Joshua asked.

Logan nodded. "Yes" He almost started then as a scream sounded and he frowned. That didn't sound like Zack. It sounded like 494. He looked at Joshua. "Isn't Psy Ops- up there… the place where they hurt upstairs people?"

"Rooms run underneath" Joshua made a low growling. "I hear them screaming, crying- all the time"

Following the sound, Logan moved through the passages. They wouldn't be hurting 494- and it made no sense until he and Joshua reached the area with the grate that connected the two levels at this room. Logan stood on the crates- and looked through the grate. At first glance it appeared to be 494 and a pair of heels moved past the grate. Blinking- Logan watched as a scientist moved into view and injected something into the man's IV. She raised a cassette recorder. "493 seems to be responding to this line of treatment, but has been incoherent since the repair to his spinal column"

Ben.

Logan got down and leaned against the wall. For a long moment. 452 had spent so much time second guessing herself, hurting. When all Manticore had done was bring him back- and death itself here was not an escape.

"Logan is sad?" Joshua asked quietly, looking back up towards the direction of the incoherent screams as Logan looked up at the same time, almost unconsciously.

"They're hurting him" Logan said. "It's always sad when someone hurts another person"

* * *

To Be Continued.

* * *

Done- and my ring finger hurts because while getting ice cream out I rested my hand inside the freezer and my fingers stuck. So I grabbed water and poured it so I could move it off- and now I have freezer burn on it.

For those who wonder about Alec- he is a Manticore soldier and yes he is manipulating Logan but he's doing it for in his mind- for the right reasons. Alec isn't the villain in the piece despite having killed Bling which he did in a fight- under orders. And Ben? Well if they can bring someone back from a gunshot from the head- they can bring them back from a snapped neck- at least in theory. And last of all there will be no familiars. At all.

And anyone who doesn't know what the word 'Fricking' is a substitute for- pm me and I'll tell you.

Okay, now you know the drill- see the button at the bottom of the text. That's the review button. Press it and something magic happens.

Chapter Completion: 3/28/2009 and Edited 5/20/2009 a.k.a. Year of the Pulse.


	5. Change In the Wind

Disclaimer: Dark Angel –not mine. Dark Angel- James Cameron and FOX. Which is totally unfair- not the Cameron/Eglee part but the FOX part.

They seriously don't deserve a show like DA (FOX) Max is in this chapter but only because the point in the story finally warrants it. I was not sure before how to work her in- and it ends up helping the overall plot.

So we're in the year of the pulse- and might I say I was so disappointed that there was no Pulse. I know it's would have been bad but didn't mean for a moment I didn't think it could happen. Sorry for the delay. I am trying to improve my updating speed but it's one of those in the works things. Thank you for the reviews- they are the best incentive, they make me feel good and guilt trip me.

Until then, on with the story.

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**Chapter Five**

**Change in the Wind**

* * *

Zack had been surprised after coming out of Lydecker's latest game to get to Logan and find him so… together. He was broken- nothing could change half the rewiring Manticore had taken upon itself to do. But somehow Logan was holding it together- at least for now.

Knowing that unit five would return the next day- Zack had used what threats he could against the negligent guard to get into Logan's cell. Their desire not to be killed during any escape attempt was something Zack used to his advantage as often as he could. It most commonly yielded effective results.

"You think with this equipment you can create a computer to hack into Manticore's mainframe?"

Breaking away from the crate where he had been putting the chips from various systems, Logan looked to Zack and nodded. "I built the ones that are … not here" Logan seemed to become frustrated at every time that he couldn't complete his sentence or what he was thinking- where something should be said that Eyes Only didn't remember. Or that had been buried deep within his mind so he could protect the information from Lydecker. "Once its up and running – I can get it in- all these are configured to Manticore's mainframe, it shouldn't take more than a basic system override"

"What can I do to assist?"

It would take them a few nights- and Zack had to push Logan away from all the hardware. The older man needed purpose and he had been fighting the one that Manticore had been attempting to give him. Max had called it Logan's mission- and Zack was very glad for it. Especially now.

Back in his own 'space' Zack thought about Ben. It had taken him all of two minutes to realize any escape attempt- unless the trainers, staff and everyone here had collective mental lapses including Lydecker- that it would be impossible to include Ben in any such attempt. Besides- even if Zack could conceivably get Ben out he would be in the same place as the previous year. His brother was insane- nothing short of years and attention could change Ben's mental state- and Zack didn't have that. He was trying to keep the others, Jace and Logan, if an escape proved successful, and got them out of here- out of Manticore's hands. Ben would just leave and start killing again- drawing attention, putting them all in danger.

It still got to Zack though. So did 734. He had failed his sister- that was how she had ended up like this. If he had even played the strategy he was using now- fighting Lydecker silently, he may have gotten them both out of here. All before Brin was turned and he was used against the others.

* * *

**Fogle Towers-Seattle, Washington**

* * *

Max stared at the computer screen, staring at the screen annoyed and she pushed away from the desk. How the hell had Logan done this- day in, day out- stare at the stupid screens- write computer code… she was starting to think being the muscle of Eyes Only had been the easier part. At least then you didn't have to find Pierpoint Lempkin's dealings- the hard proof of them. You just had to whack them one or swipe something.

She glowered at the computer and the ringing phone proved an eager distraction. Max picked it up, and stepped out of the room. "Go for Max"

The X5 listened to the details from the informant- noting them mentally but writing out a hard copy. It had formed a habit- it was kind of a good idea for people not to know of her aforementioned superpowers. As she disconnected – the front door unlocked and Max relaxed as she recognized the form. Former Detective Matt Sung. After the bad guy had taken him and Logan- and then was taken down- Detective Sung was told to retire- or consider his days numbered by his superiors.

He had been Max's first thought when it came to a confidante- he came through- knew the Informant Net business and knew the big Eyes Only secret. Bling's death still hurt- and it had happened all because he had been covering her ass. Then Captain Dick had killed him because he was in the way of the objective. Captain Dick otherwise known as 494. If Lydecker was countin' on him looking like Ben to put her off the game- he really needed to think again.

"Max" Matt Sung winced as he held up the yellow manila envelope- with the imprint of a disk case inside and Max felt her insides turn cold. They both knew what was on it- or what would be.

She took the disk and gave him a sympathetic sad smile. "Go- I can do it alone" The long hair partially drawn off her face made her look like such a different person than she had been less than five months ago.

Sung nodded. "I know- but you don't have to" He followed her to the Eyes Only platform. It was ironic- after Gerhardt Bronck- Logan had set up the system and shown Bling all he needed to do to keep Eyes Only going if something happened to him. Sung didn't think he had counted on this.

Max would get that look every time- like the one she had now. That obsessed driven look he had remembered Logan would get. The card that had come with it said simply: _How much more time does Mr. Cale have Max?_

She waited until Matt had left- to replay it. Over, and over, and over again. And then she paused it- right as it focused in on his face. Max touched the screen briefly "I will get you out…I promise"

She fought her need to cry as she turned back to the task at hand. Max had a broken world to fix- and yeah it'd still be broken in the morning. But maybe a little less than before.

* * *

**Manticore**

* * *

The food was bland as always- but it seemed better. Logan had a feeling it had to do with some conference in Atlanta that Colonel Lydecker had been overheard to be attending. And the trainers were overlooking unit five's conversation- but then they had just completed the mission with flying colors.

Alec was leading the recount "The scientist type just stands there- blinking at Gem… listening to her chat him up" Gem had a disgusted look on her face. Of all of them, X5 361 didn't seem to enjoy recounting the missions very much. At least the way Alec and Biggs did it. They all switched between barcodes and names- as if either worked.

Zack shook his head- his disgust was much more apparent than Gem's. Logan knew if he wasn't trying not to help them- he would have ripped into them for every single error in tactics and strategy. No compliments but cold hard fact. He could remember the lectures that Zack would give 452. Not what they were about, but it was Zack's way of being the C/O- looking out for her even when she didn't follow his lead. His disinterest and disdain was because he didn't care.

"So Logan- could have used you, I hear you're great with the computer geek stuff- talking that in-depth stuff that could have saved 361 her virtue" Logan almost started from the nod to his non soldier skills being useful. He didn't notice the dangerous look Alec had in his eyes.

But Zack had and the scorn was apparent. "After the attempt to make a fast end to the mission- I doubt-" he stopped and they all did as 734 joined them. The one thing sure to kill the conversation, with the knowledge with every word going straight back to Command.

Except for Biggs who leaned in close to her. "So 734- any orders from the Colonel that we should be aware of" He was baiting her. None of the unit was happy with her being there- the hidden agenda with the 'retrieval' only the latest slight.

734 stared him down and her black eyes were almost soulless. "If there was, you would have been informed"

"R-ight" Biggs said, pushing it. "So Brin- I can call you Brin right?"

"846" Alec warned in a low voice.

"How does it feel to be the traitor to every unit you've been in Brin, you're good at it" 734's eyes flashed with some emotion akin to anger and she stood. 734 left the mess hall wordlessly , her slightly harder thrust to the door the only other sign she had been affected by the conversation.

Biggs smiled coolly. "I guess she can't take the compliment"

"You keep this up – Lydecker will send you to psy ops and assign that as CO- you think I'm hard on you as a second in Command?" Alec left no self pity in his voice betray the fact he had once been in charge of the unit. Biggs just shoved a utensil in the food savagely and kept silent. At the moment, Alec had been placed in charge temporarily until their CO returned from a deep cover op.

Zack knew better than to hope it got to her in the way it would have once. It got to her because as a soldier- loyalty was the quality prized above all other qualities. Traitor in Manticore was a degrading insult used for the worst of the worst.

It was logical for 734 to leave or even be steamed under the collar. She was going to report it and Biggs would be sent to isolation most likely. For now- Zack was quite aware of the fact that _when _he got Logan and himself out of Manticore- Biggs would pay for his actions. At the moment Lydecker was prioritizing. The bastard never spread himself too thin… it was how he gained ground on the others .

But that wouldn't keep Zack from leaving.

The incident with 734 in the mess hall had consequences. And not just for Biggs who had been assigned three days in isolation. There were two exercises that were universally hated by X5s. Submergence Endurance 'The Tank' and Live Ordinance Drill. Both had high fatality rates during early training. The number of sessions were reduced and conducted only once every year at random once the unit reached adulthood.

But age didn't lower the danger- in fact with Live Ordinance Drill it became higher as the test was toughened. And it had been suddenly rostered for that afternoon.

* * *

_**Seattle**_

* * *

It was almost too easy. Max slammed her thigh into the hapless criminal, sending him to the ground. Lempkin was hiring far down the ladder. That or all this fighting Manticore made everything else seem a cinch. In any case she enjoyed taking her frustrations out on the muscle part of the 'Eyes Only' gig.

Turning away from the unconscious sentry, Max moved over to the bookcase and almost shook her head. This wouldn't take down King Dirtbag but it would take down a rather twisted lieutenant who filmed himself killing people as if it were some macho symbol of pride. " Makes my job easier- these people… though its whack" Max muttered.

A chuckle came over the ear piece. ' _As a ex cop all I can say is it doesn't get any less shocking_'

Max grinned and winced at the sharp pain in her neck- probably a seizure coming on. She soundlessly groaned- just meant that the mix Doc Sam had come up with was not working with the implant.

She pulled the recordings she needed out and into her jacket. Max then shook off the aches from her head and started down towards the staircase. From her angle she could see the package on the foyer's table- _Jam Pony. _Max really had to get around to telling Normal that she had quit. But it was fun to see how many angry type messages she could get from the uptight Republican.

Quickly edging to the front door, Max noted with a smirk that no one had noticed that all the guards were taking a nap. She placed a hand on the door and a jerk from the hand was all the warning she got before she fell seizing onto the tile floor.

" Matt!.."

* * *

_**Manticore **_

* * *

" 846 you are dead!"

Normally Zack would have had to focus that the unit was not going to shove him into the path of a bullet but they were more likely to do that to the one who had gotten them into this.

All Logan could hear was the whizz of the bullets in the air, to the point where they were blocking out all the other sounds to a background buzz. His heartbeat was one of those distant sounds and Logan dove to the ground to miss the barrage that came his way.

This was what they endured- _a human rights violation_.

Logan dug his fingers into the dirt to silence the voice from his mind . Logan wanted to hold onto the voice in his mind of who he used to be… but to focus on that now would be suicide. A spider crawled across his hand, making him grimace.

_His footsteps, the cracking on foliage under his feet-_

The flashback broke as 734 pushed him from the ground and it exploded as the metal slugs tore up the ground. Logan could barely hear her hissed reprimand. He could see Zack making his way past Alec...and the guards readying to fire again.

Drawing up to his height Logan ran feeling the wind in his face as he moved from the path of the shifting bullets, the sting of the air an almost reassuring guide.

And then the wind shifted.

* * *

The burn of the rubber and the shouting faded as Matt Sung glanced back. They weren't following- and he could almost feel the painful wrench Max gave. He'd seen her shake before- had been how he had first started to learn about her. But this was different… and not just because it had just about gotten her killed.

And judging by her slowing breaths- it still might prove just that. If Max hadn't reached the door before the seizure had started, he never would have been able to get her out.

Sung drove faster.

* * *

Everything blurred as Logan felt his side stab with sharp pain, and he grabbed at air as he fell. The air had a metallic taste to it. A 734 blur moved out of focus and a face that shouldn't be there came into focus.

Reaching out to touch her face, the world shifted to a blinding white.

* * *

_**To Be Continued…**_

* * *

This chapter's end was kind of inspired from the Pretender episode 'In My Hour of Death'… and it's time to press that magic 'review' button. Thanks!

-Allison

Chapter Completed: 13/7/2009 or 7/13/09.


	6. Hope and Fear

Disclaimer: Really? Fine, I yet again say I don't own DA-, FOX and James Cameron do so please don't sue me. And coming from the DAN (Dark Angel United Network) very soon hopefully is a cartoon promoting DA (will be on YouTube) - and I voice a character... (just listen for the apparently very Australian accented Max)

Yes I choose to be an optimist. In the face of so many bad TV shows and remakes of late. Thank you for reviewing- I really do appreciate them.

* * *

**Chapter Six**

**Hope And Fear**

**

* * *

**

_Max could feel the thrum of the music at Crash, and she smiled as Sketchy failed to land his ball in the hole. Some things never changed. Thanking the bartender, Max held her mug of beer tight as she moved through the crowd, Logan following her._

"_Max" She didn't want to face him, look at something that would just fade away. He grabbed her by the arm and Max turned around shocked by his touch- there but not there._

"_When you think you see me, I'm not here... you know that right" Logan backed away his voice bitter. "I'm not here because you left me behind"_

_She shook her head. "I am sorry... Logan please!" Max frowned... as everything paused around her and went black and white. By the door, there was another Logan... and somehow she just knew it was him. But he looked different... changed. Max made her way around the frozen figures, not daring to take her eyes off him for even an instant._

_Raising her hand, Max touched his face. Manticore must have made him shave... and he seemed almost hesitant to believe that it was really her._

_Max was unsure as well- it couldn't be real but here they... were? She led him out onto the cold Seattle street._

"_We've been here before" Logan said quietly._

_The X5 squeezed his hand. " Sorry for bailing that night- but your uncle's legacy was sort of tailing us... you know... dearly departed Jonas- talks out of his ass" Max looked into Logan's face worried when he seemed to freeze up._

_It was as if- no it was exactly like he couldn't remember. This was what Manticore did to you- messed with your head until you lost all semblance of reality and identity._

"_....It's too bad you never got to see him in the bunny suit" Logan found the thought bubbled up at her concern. He had to be strong- for her. He couldn't be her weakness. What the Colonel would use against him. "This can't be real, can it?"_

"_My dream- your dream, what's the difference?" Max quipped and held onto him. Trying hard not to think about what would happen when it was over. Logan seemed to have been of like mind, holding onto her tightly. _

* * *

_**Manticore**_

* * *

Watching Logan's unconscious form, Alec frowned. Another few inches and there would have been a fatality- not that there had not been various damages from the live ordinance drill session. The older man was not the only one injured- somehow Biggs had managed to stay bullet free... but Cece and Kiron/374 had been nearly as unlucky as Logan.

In any case being sent back on the pursuit of 452 was not his first choice of assignment.

Every time he went after her- 452 always found some way out. And Seattle was her grounds- her territory and as long as he went after her there it would be nearly impossible to bring her in. His sole purpose seemed to be to keep 452 on her toes... not let her have a moment to centre.

The Colonel not sending 734 with him was weird though. The former traitor wasn't a flight risk, hell Alec would be surprised if she had anything still happening in there.

And she was staring at him again. Alec could see her cold, black soulless eyes staring into his own. 734 showed up everywhere on this damn base- like a spider waiting to bite down the second you turned your back on it. Alec smirked- knowing that it would drive her simplified brain haywire trying to figure out what it meant.

734 moved out of sight.

Feeling her heart settle, Brin swallowed feeling her throat open back up. If Alec had seen her- if anyone had seen her enter the armoury it would have been over. She held the spare blade in her hand.

The coherence came at varying times- and it brought self loathing. For an hour- ten minutes that she almost was the girl she had been. And Brin hated X5 734... hated the soldier that seemed controlled her every action. The conditioning that had her hand Tinga over to her death.

_I knew you couldn't be one of them._

But she was. Brin tightened her grip and felt the blade dig into her skin. She had been weak, afraid- and had given in. The weak link. Everyone else had fought them- even Lydecker seemed disappointed with how easy it had been.

And even after all the mind games- they came again. Lydecker desperate to erase all traces of the Director's handiwork in her mind.

The strange thing was... they made her find herself again. And it scared Brin because she didn't understand... didn't know why Lydecker wanted her to find herself. It could be anything from getting the others to the monster's twisted sense of needing the real 734- or a version he could control.

"Never again" Brin hissed, relaxing her grip. She waited until the guards were distracted to move down the cell hall and to her target. She entered the empty cell and crossed to the drawn up sleeping pad and let it down. She lay down on her back, and smiled.

He had found the journal.

Brin drew the blade up and slid it into place, using an elastic band to tie a slip of paper to it. Then pulling herself up, Brin walked out of the room. She drew the cell door shut quietly, and felt her awareness slipping.

She closed her eyes and focused. Brin filled her mind with misinformation, and everything else that she could.

Forget what she knew- and make up for everything she had caused.

* * *

_**Harbour Lights Medical, Seattle**_

* * *

Max almost freaked out when she woke up at the antiseptic smell. She sat up – ready to move if needed, and felt almost embarrassed at Dr. Carr's amused expression.

"Childhood issues" Max said with a shrug and almost horked at the pain radiating from the back of her neck. "What happened?"

"The implant you picked up awhile back "Carr frowned. " The severe seizures were a warning sign Max... you are lucky Matt was able to get you in here in time to get it out... you aren't invincible"

She rolled her eyes, and lay back down reluctantly. "And the men in the white coats would be so disappointed"

Carr leaned on the foot of the bed. "Max don't worry- you can stay in here safely... rest up- catch what remains from before the pulse of bad daytime television"

Max made a show of looking defeated, but brush with death or not come morning she'd be out. Hospitals never screamed security to her. Especially not at this moment thinking on... the dream. Had it just been wishful thinking that it had happened again?

The hole that Logan's departure from her life had left a mark... all those years holding people at arm's length. Had she been living or just going through the motions- letting Manticore control her. It felt like... until Seattle, she had never broken the chains to Manticore. That when Max had let herself feel, to be hanging with her friends, being with Logan and fighting all the bad things in the world- it had been the day she broke free completely of her former captors.

Max sat up, ignoring the pain- staring at her reflection in the glass into the night. But Manticore fought back- and had taken the people she cared most about. Her family.

_I will burn you down Lydecker_.

"Now that's just sad, sitting there, looking all desperate"

Max turned and grinned for real. "What's a girl meant to do when she's down- I can't exactly kick ass like this"

Original Cindy shook her head and tapped the small television. "I wasn't even talkin' about the sad state you're in home girl – I was talking about that vanilla slice on the screen letting the weasel walk all over her" Cindy sat on the edge of the bed. "I know better than to go into that talk... just leads to my boo getting all out of whack"

"So Herbal's all packed?" Max asked, changing the subject.

"All over it- I wonder what his shortie's parents are going to think of their new son in law and such" Max laughed, and she felt it as well. At least with the implant gone- they couldn't try to track her anymore. She almost skipped Herbal's wedding to his girl because of the damn little parasite. It had been... a typical Jam Pony function. Normal invited but mysteriously sick the entire time- Sketchy turning up with Natalie and going home alone... it was enough to make her miss her old job.

But life went on, or kept coming out- in Normal's case.

* * *

_**Manticore**_

* * *

It seemed cruel to return to reality... the only difference from the last visit to the infirmary was the lack of restraints. Logan noticed like last time, the doctors and nurses avoided really looking him in the eye. But then in here- their job was to patch soldiers up- not tear their minds apart.

Zack had passed by earlier with the barest nod of acknowledgment but then in here, they were under a microscope. It was bad enough Colonel Lydecker realized that Zack was looking out for him... there was no need to further provoke the commander into exploiting the bond that had formed between them.

The hours dragged on, and Logan took to counting things in his mind to give any sense of relief. Thinking on the things he remembered, and eventually on the dream. It had felt like 452's name had been right there on the edge of his tongue... like she really had been with him.

Around her- memories became real, as if what Manticore had done meant nothing. That if he held onto her, she would catch him again as he fell.

Days passed and by the time Logan was well enough to return to semi active duty- he felt as if he could fight them forever. That was the positive side to being shot again- no Psy Ops.

Logan laced up the boots, and heard the door open and the talk vanish from the room. The hairs on Logan's neck stood still and he looked up.

_... Anti Christ ... up close and personal._

Her voice whispered into his ear, helping Logan meet Lydecker's gaze.

Lydecker found it intriguing that that look of defiance was catching. He had seen it in his kids... and the people they came into contact with. Like the spirit that fighting Manticore had given them was contagious. That it would be out there, even after he brought them all home.

He watched Cale, wondering if the man would buck here. Defy openly, and in the process condemn himself to another round of reprogramming. Just to prove he still could.

Slowly Logan stood, and raised his arm in salute. "X9 208 reporting for duty, sir!"

Could Cale even notice that with that spirit, his own was fading. Lydecker didn't let emotion show on his face for his victory. Eyes Only was beginning to accept his reality... slowly but surely becoming what he wished the idealist to become.

Max would watch this. The truth was even if Max right now offered herself in trade, Lydecker wouldn't accept. He would have both of them- making them break wasn't a hope but the outcome of all of this.

And she didn't understand why he hunted her so relentlessly. Because after all these years of searching for the chink in Zack's armour... it had appeared right in front of his eyes.

And Max could take Zack's place. Lydecker had to break her- because she was a leader... one that could surpass Zack. He had seen it this last year- the night Renfro had been taken out.

And Lydecker was proud of what she made herself, that she could rebuild from ashes. But she was still the girl, not all she could be. And that was how he was going to catch her. Because Max would never let her family go. That was her greatest weakness.

"You are dismissed soldier" Lydecker didn't give him a second glance as he left the infirmary.

Logan moved past Colonel Lydecker, the eerie calm that had helped his stand seeming to seep into his bones like a cold chill. He had pulled it off too well...

At least there was something to show for it, or rather not to. The longer that he wasn't sent to Psy Ops- the more time he would have to recover.

Or so Logan told himself... he had never ...heard the designation that Manticore had given him before- and had always been able to block it from his mind

It was just a whisper now- but how long would that last?

"Hey" Biggs had started walking next to him, almost as if he had been waiting there. But judging by the bulge in his pocket- it was more likely he had been acquiring things for trade again and had hid when the Colonel had approached the infirmary. "Just wanted to say sorry- for the lung puncture and all..."

Logan stopped and just looked at the X5 sceptically.

Biggs winced slightly. "Well not so much that... just the others are kind of getting me back for landing us all in that drill... you know mud on my boots, getting me isolation and punishment detail- but I really was checking to see if you were okay"

"I am fine Biggs" Logan replied, and lapsed into silence as a drill sergeant and instructor passed them. "Really I am... and I don't hold you responsible- after all it was ultimately the Colonel's orders"

"I miss the desert, I really do- hot and really repetitive but at least our old base didn't have him" Biggs rested his hands behind his head. "I mean Renfro- grade A riding our asses but she was more into the standing above it all... and we didn't catch the heat we do from Colonel Lydecker. Still, he's better than Renfro and Sandoval in the ways that count," Biggs added catching Logan's expression. "Like what happened the Berrisford assignment and 494"

Logan frowned. "What mission was that?"

Biggs laughed and stepped backwards. "Nice try, but you won't get anything from me on that- not that I know much, you could ask Alec but then he doesn't talk to anyone about it, and he'd probably turn you black and blue for asking..."

"...and look this is your stop" They were right at the door to the passageway that led to the isolation cells. "See you in training"

Logan nodded but was lost in thought as Biggs left. Was that how Alec had lost command of his unit... Alec, Biggs all of them was meant to be the enemy but Logan was finding it harder and harder to just see Unit 5 as the enemy. And that was probably the point.

He didn't even fight as the guards escorted him to his cell. Logan had never really understood why 452 had that look of regret every time she talked about Manticore. Like he did now- it wasn't about the place. It was for everyone she had to leave behind to escape. What would be the price if he and Zack escaped for them?

Logan slammed the chained pad down in frustration and something clattered to the ground. He frowned and leaned down, reaching under. By sheer luck his hand had found the handle of the blade before the metal.

Taking off the elastic band, Logan folded out the note.

_Don't stop fighting them._

* * *

**Space Needle, Seattle**

* * *

It was different to stand up here now. Max felt the wind in her hair and looked down on the city. She couldn't help but think about the people she had shared the Space Needle, her 'high place' with.

And how every single one of them was now gone. Seth, Ben... Logan and that somehow it always ended with her alone again.

Up here, you couldn't see corruption that was as much Seattle as the places were. There was only a city that needed protecting... and the people, the normal people who complained about their lives who didn't know how good they had it.

_Don't they realize that they should be grateful for that deadbeat brother who crashed on the couch- or the dead end job that filled the hours up. They are able to walk down the street without being afraid that some secret government organization is going to come after them- and screw their life up every time._

_But obsessing over the what if's in my life is only going to give me a headache. Like Logan said- bad things happen but you've gotta deal with the consequences that come after._

_There's former lab techs... guards. Victor. Some doc that isn't Vertes that wants out. Somewhere on that base is the one person who can help me get Logan and Zack out. I just have to find them. _

_And Lydecker- you think sending me discs is going to break me? It just makes me stronger, 'cause I know why I fight._

_And you're just reminding me why._

_For my family._

* * *

_**To Be Continued...**_

* * *

Well this chapter's an improvement on the whole slow updating thing- a month and half is better than three months. I know, not much of an excuse... but I am trying. Okay well, I'm off to write the next chapter... so please review, it's a better guilt trip than anything else. I don't know about other writers but reviews tend to prod me into action. I will try to improve further.

And 'Dollhouse' not getting cancelled... is it possible that FOX would change its evil ways. Or is it like Lydecker, playing along until he can go for the kill... I'm thinking the latter.

-Allison

Chapter Completed: 29/8/09 or 8/29/09, Year of the Pulse.


	7. The Ghosts in the Machine

Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel. James Cameron, Charles Eglee and Manticore's minions at FOX do. And it's Manticore's minions because they cancelled Dollhouse- so much for wonderful future seasons with Echo on the run from the Dollhouse just like Max and Manticore. It wasn't DA but it was something. Thanks for everyone who read it and more so to those who reviewed- a gold star of praise from Zack is in order.

And without fanfare or self proclamation, here is the next chapter. Enjoy.

* * *

**Chapter Seven**

**Ghosts in the Machine**

* * *

_**Manticore.**_

Zack had many reasons for hating Manticore, besides not being out there to protect all of them. Often Max and the others questioned him- and used all kinds of arguments as to why having to stay apart was a bad idea. Max wasn't the only one who said he was in still, in mind in Manticore.

Zack looked around at the concrete walls. He hated this, the trapped feeling he got- even down here doing look out as Logan worked on the computer tech junk. They were still trapped inside Manticore and even this façade of freedom could not change that. Lydecker's presence never let him forget that. One of the greatest advantages of being free and out in the world was the lack of the bastard. Of all the people who worked here who Zack would quite happily kill if he met outside of Manticore, Lydecker was the worst and on top of the list. And because of the, now two times Zack had been within neck snapping distance of the Manticore CO, the bastard had the stones to suggest that he couldn't kill him.

There was at least a book's length on ways he would love to kill Lydecker. Zack could feel his expression go cold. Worse than that was when Lydecker wasn't here, because it meant he was pursuing the others.

"Cut it away Logan, we have less than twenty to get back to our cells" Zack knew he shouldn't be surprised by Logan's progress. Any man that designs systems that Manticore can't trace was clearly competent.

Logan nodded as he did something to the computer code, and then shut it down. "When we have this loaded into the system, we really should test it on a file system first- to test the security"

"What file system?"Zack asked bluntly. Logan had been on the verge of asking something for the last few hours- Zack recognized the look well from Jondy. Jondy had the habit of requesting new locations that factored into her cause or taking off and leaving a brief message at the contact number. She had been in the process of changing locales before all this and was the only one that Zack genuinely didn't know where she was at that current moment.

"Statistically speaking old reports would be among the files with the most lenient security compared to current operations"

"This is about 494's failure isn't it?" Logan's silence confirmed it and Zack felt his mood worsen. It was bad enough 494 was playing some sort of Psy Op with Logan. "494 is Manticore and the enemy- all you will get by reading into this is emotions that will get in the way of any escape we make"

Logan gave a brittle smile. "Zack, I did this all the time as Eyes Only - it's solely so I can know my enemy better"

And there was the month and a half free of Psy Ops rearing its head- in a way. Everything Logan said now was colored by this place. Zack imagined that if Max had never gotten involved with him, Logan still would have gone after Manticore. But in that case- Manticore would have simply had him killed if he was captured rather than this.

"Keep that in mind Logan"

Zack was still trying to figure out who was trying to help them. It couldn't be anyone from that unit because they wouldn't risk a lengthy stay in Psy Ops. Lydecker wouldn't risk giving them any type of advantage. He was wary of any help after that doctor turned out to be just another tool in getting him to reveal the location of the others.

No there was no one here they could trust. Only those who seeked to make him let his guard down. And Zack wouldn't let that happen.

* * *

"Damn it" Biggs pulled the razor wire out of his boot and glared at Cece. "I said sorry- what do you want 581?"

The female soldier crossed her arms. "For you to stop teasing the drone- 'cause every time you do something the whole unit suffers... its like 599's influencing you or something" Her words cut deeper than a blade.

It got a reaction and Biggs advanced on her. "I am nothing like that traitor"

"Then stop it" Cece narrowed her eyes as she rolled up her pant leg. The wound where the bullet had entered was almost completely healed. It had almost hit the artery and Biggs was reminded of that and felt the tail of shame.

"Figures that 'Zack' didn't get hit" Biggs muttered. It would have been much more satisfying to watch the CO of the rat unit taken down all the way. The traitors had been screwed to end up with a commander like that. Alec was completely different. 494 was always there to look out and protect the unit. He used his experiences in Psy Ops to keep the rest of the unit free of it. At least it was clear that the Colonel was evaluating that situation despite the failed assignment... which already put him ahead of Director Renfro. The other day- Biggs had tempered his words. 846 knew better than to express an opinion of the flawed and unfit for command Renfro with Logan. The older man was adjusting to his role as a soldier and needed to learn loyalty.

In honesty- Renfro was evil. She had always seen them all as cattle. She didn't see them as she should- soldiers. It was among Bigg's favorite days- when he had seen her body after 734 had executed her by the Colonel's orders.

Cece had taken his silence as it came and had finished making her bunk. It was how the unit worked- they could be good just in the same room performing tasks. "Take it like this" Cece said finally with a smirk. "We can always put razor wire in his boots"

Biggs copied a gesture he had seen a guard use as 734 walked in. Why was it that when he could remember every Common Verbal way to call her a drone...pod person- it would only get him in more trouble?

"Briefing is at 0700" 734 said, her voice the same old dull monotone as it always was and she turned around to leave and paused. "'Figures' I didn't get a chance to push you into a bullet"

After 734 had left, Cece stepped forward. "That's just great... she was bugging us- guess that cues isolation for us both"

Biggs shook his head. "Did she just crack a joke... 734?"

* * *

Biggs' mind was still tripping over it when he volunteered to go get Logan and 599 instead of Gem. He was not reporting it however. Whatever the comment had been- it was something he couldn't do to anyone... even a traitor. Not after all that messing with her head.

Besides it was probably just an errant thought. He'd seen it before in transgenics who spent a lot of time in Psy Ops. There really was not anyone in there- it was just a thought from who they once were. But it was at least good to know that 734 was not the perfect soldier- that there might be some room in that drone's mind for loyalty for them after all. That and it went along the lines of not making life difficult for the drone.

The guards had been slack because Biggs found 599 in Logan's cell.

At least he hadn't come in a moment ago, Logan knew if he had, he would have caught them re-entering the cell from the wall. Then they would have been in for it. But then in the future- they would have to give it more time to get back. The computer needed to stay a secret.

Biggs stood toe to toe with Zack. "Today is very important- we face Unit 9 off- and the winner of this exercise- gets scheduled down time... the losers are awake at 0300 for the next two weeks doing whatever exercise the instructors can torture them with..."

Zack's features hardened. "Is this your way of ordering me to co operate...846 I have no will to give Manticore any kind of performance"

Risking his arm, Biggs patted Zack on the shoulder. 'That's our punishment- for you it's two straight weeks of Psy Ops... don't worry 208... Logan will be safe with us"

If looks could kill- Biggs would be on the ground and his body parts separated.

"Will Colonel Lydecker be watching the exercise?" Logan asked in an attempt to diffuse the situation- and to find a happy medium- or any kind of medium.

"No" Biggs said. Logan knew it was not just looking out for him, he was not that conceited. But even Zack himself risked cracking under the strain of Psy Ops. As they were now- Zack was much better at maintaining his mind and keeping information from Manticore than he was.

Zack pushed passed Biggs who seemed to take the other's silence as agreement.

'_...then keep your eyes on the prize....' _

The manipulations were more obvious by now, but Logan knew better than to call anyone on it. Knowing it, meant keeping one step ahead of the game which could and would lead to escape He knew it and Zack knew it. It didn't mean either of them liked it. But it meant doing exactly what the part of himself that he couldn't remember said- keeping his eye on the goal.

And that meant making sure that no one went to Psy Ops.

* * *

Capture the Flag. It sounded like a children's game... not that Logan could remember or felt like he could remember playing it. The Manticore equivalent was not a child's game. They were standing outside the woods and somewhere else was the other unit.

Each unit would have their own four by six tent, which was their base which they had to defend with the flag inside. They would also have their own surveillance and communication equipment. The exercise would actually start at dusk but they had the day to set up and prepare.

As the unit trekked into the woods, and silence took over he noticed that 734... Brin looked unsure over something. At least when she thought no one was watching her- most of them were not. But Logan was.

They arrived at the designated clearing and started to set up. It seemed to be very quickly decided that Logan should be surveillance. Logan didn't actually remember the 'why' but felt how strange this was- they all knew about Eyes Only when who his family had been had never even suspected. But then in the failed mission to take down Manticore- a lot had been riding on success. Including his identity and it turned out a lot more.

But would Renfro have been any better?

"Do you require any assistance" Logan turned, and was surprised slightly at who was offering. 734 had walked into the tent.

Logan shook his head. "No, thanks" It had come out sounding less genuine than he would like but the memory of 734 forcing the hand on the Colonel's request was etched into his brain. Even if this was a unit exercise and they were all actually working for the same thing- he just couldn't let himself pretend he could trust her.

734 however stayed, and was staring at the surveillance screen that was still off. Logan stood and watched as she seemed to stare her own reflection down. Catching him staring, 734 nodded curtly and left.

What had that been about? He turned on the remaining screen, not before seeing his own face. Was it his or was it Manticore? Logan froze suddenly. Had that been what 734 was doing? The journal and the knife...

'_No numbers- they make Brin into numbers, make her sad'_ Joshua's statement was like a bolt of lightning- the realization of… how would a reindoctrinated soldier be sad... or be anything at all.

As the darkness came and the horn signaled the beginning on the exercise, Zack sat in the tree trying to keep his sight on the mission at hand. But what Logan told him replayed on his mind and it was a distraction that in spite of himself- Zack wanted to believe. Could she really still be alive in there? The others were his only weakness and Lydecker knew it. What if this was just Lydecker playing him- and could he risk just ignoring it.

'_We're going to get her out of there someday, you and me'_

Zack knew how that had ended. In the downward spiral that got them to this place because they had not saved her in time. Because they let Manticore destroy their sister. Because they had ignored Renfro until it had cost Tinga her life. Because he didn't put his foot down that day and had ignored his instincts. Because he didn't ignore Lydecker's crap about teamwork. He could have gotten Krit and Syl to listen- and Logan would have done anything to protect Max- Zack knew that now.

A member of unit nine, X5 724 crept up and Zack soundlessly dropped down and knocked him out in that instant. Zack restrained the younger soldier and then carried him to where Gem, the unit medic sat. Unlike the other members of her unit – there was no glare. She did not let her emotions affect the mission.

So he returned the favor. Or at least attempted to before the trainers and sergeant closely followed by 846 who was clearly enjoying himself. He was accompanied by Brin and 374. It was moments like this that reminded him not to let his guard down. This was not an average unit- it was the best out of Renfro's. Why else would Lydecker have left them assigned here- none. Only three soldiers had attempted to breach the perimeter which meant unit 9 had left the rest guarding their own flag. That was a mistake. A simple diversionary tactic coupled with timing and the decoy had been utilized here. This exercise required a unique balance of defense and offence.

Zack studied Brin's face carefully as the Sergeant praised the unit- for any sign. When none came- no disgust or anything, he accepted it. He didn't have a choice. As they were dismissed however she just kept standing there for the moment- as if she was waiting for something to happen and then went to move off.

The rest of the unit was headed for downtime in the recreation room, the well earned prize. Zack felt no desire to join them, and he had to take advantage of the fact that there was no Lydecker and that the guards were so lax to do this. Not enough to try escape. The X7s would be on him before he got within thirty meters of the fence. Instead he followed Brin.

She headed straight back into Manticore and Zack followed closely behind. It was difficult because every minute it seemed she would check the area around her. What if Lydecker was here and she was just checking in… that would make more sense. And Zack was playing into his moment of weakness and giving Lydecker an opening-

They were outside the training gym. Zack watched from the door, and moved as Brin looked around again and then undid her black military issue jacket, throwing it on the floor. And then did a series of flips and twists across the fighting mats that made Zack's heart pause for a moment as he dug for the memory. He didn't have to forget but had done to protect himself against Lydecker using her against him. In 2014 – Zack had found Brin in New York. She had taken up residence in an old, abandoned school gym- spending her days doing all kinds of acrobatic moves. When he had asked… she had said…

"It helps free the mind"

Brin turned in shock as Zack walked into the large and mainly empty space.

* * *

After Zack had left, Logan had followed Unit 5. No need to draw attention to Zack's absence. But the recreation room didn't make him feel anything like the excitement it seemed to fill them with. It was not as if the pool table, entertainment centre- among other things were to laugh at- because they weren't. But something inside Logan was angry. This was not how it was supposed to be. Just a weapon for the Colonel and for Manticore to use and the rewards was once, every so often… sometimes not for months… only the best got to have six hours as people…as human beings. And just those few hours.

This was wrong and Logan couldn't stand the sight of it. As he asked the guard to take him back to his cell- Cece approached.

"I'm just tired" Logan gave a tired smile that was not entirely false. That seemed enough to convince her and he couldn't help but find some sort of relief that the sound completely vanished from the unit as he got further away. The guard looked wary at first, his hand on his tazer. But once it became clear that he wasn't going to try and run the guard relaxed slightly.

When the door shut and the locks tumbled into place, Logan waited for the guard to vanish. The lights were already off and he pushed the bricks out of place. Pulling down the thin blanket- Logan arranged the bricks into a vague shape that could be mistaken as a body. He pushed his body through and slipped down to the basement. In moments he found his way to the storage closet and got back to work on the computer.

* * *

Brin closed her eyes for a moment. "It's been happening for months" she admitted quietly. "Moments of being… 'me', sometimes hours… but two days ago I woke up and it hasn't gone away…"

"So what does that mean?"Zack asked, without giving any feeling away.

"It doesn't mean anything!" Brin could hear the desperation in her voice. "You can't trust me… I hurt Max, I gave Tinga over- me, Zack me- because I'm too weak to control my own mind" She waited for Zack to call her a threat to the others- to leave her there.

Zack was quiet for the longest time. And then he straightened up. "That's a lie Brin, you are strong enough to fight it so pull it together soldier. Tinga's dead- I can't change that and you can't. But you can stop giving excuses because I will not accept them- is that understood"

Brin nodded, forced to look away from Zack's strong gaze. She was terrified of going away and betraying him. But maybe there was a reason the soldier was no longer in control. And to find that out and to make up for what she'd done- following Zack's orders might just be what she needed to stay strong against Lydecker.

And she couldn't fail Zack and her family again.

* * *

The screen blinked, waiting for the instructions from Logan.

"Thanks Joshua"

Logan knew that Zack didn't approve but he was becoming more attached to the transhuman. And Joshua surprised him- like coming up with a fully functioning CPU from nowhere.

"I helped?" Joshua asked, and Logan nodded.

He turned to the computer and dug into the files- he needed to test that he would not be tracked from this terminal. Logan knew what he wanted to use as a test… it was just to know 494 as the enemy. To get any doubts out of his mind. The Berrisford assignment was not particularly hard to crack into and Logan was relieved that it didn't trip anything up. A report appeared and a file of adjoined photos- a middle aged man and a teenage girl. The teenager- Rachel Berrisford, according to the file was attached to an order from almost two years ago. An order that sent X5 494 straight to Psychological Operations.

_**

* * *

**_

_**To Be Continued…**_

* * *

Sorry! I do try to update and am setting aside a day every week to work on finishing my ongoing fanfictions- no matter how much my novel is distracting me. But on the plus side- I have figured out a complete plot arc for this fic- so there will be more direction to it. And at the next chapter we are both at the halfway point and over it.

So please review, because it's really you reviewers who are keeping me going with this fic.

Chapter Completed: 16/11/09 or 11/16/09; Year of the Pulse.


	8. Stand Up To Fall

Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel- so don't sue me, because as a writer I am not worth all that much- and you can't have my _minimate! _Max figure. Because it's cute- and people should stop calling it a Lego piece. It's not. It's mini Max.

Slight spoilers for 'Designate This'. This is an extra long update- firstly on account of Merry Christmas and secondly 'cause there was no way to shorten or split the chapter without taking the impact out. Thanks to all those who read and review. ( Sorry for text positions- the Edit/Preview thing went screwy)

Slight Edit: Some things my sleep deprived mind missed, that my spell check wrecked.

* * *

**_Chapter Eight_**

**_Stand up to Fall_**

* * *

_---This is a streaming freedom bulletin video. This cable hack will last exactly sixty seconds. It cannot be traced, it cannot be stopped and it is the only free voice left in this city. There are veterans in this city who are being extorted by the very country they fought with their lives to protect. Certain individuals are abusing their positions of authority to extort veterans of thousands of dollars just to be allowed the basics to be able to live with nothing but a bleak future. Those responsible will be found and you will be exposed for your crimes. These has been a streaming video via the Eyes Only informant net. Peace Out---_

_

* * *

__**Manticore**_

* * *

One thing that could be said about 452. She gave as good as she got. 494 stood ramrod, waiting for Lydecker to finish reading the report. But the ache from the bruised ribs was making it harder than usual to maintain zero expression. Alec hoped 452 was enjoying the aftermath of the pipe he'd used on her jaw.

Especially since the locating of 452 had been her doing. Cover for whatever activity she had completed working as Eyes Only. It was extremely difficult to track her via the Eyes Only activities and Command didn't want to bring down the Eyes Only network. It's information, sources were second to none and on the chance they could control it? Command couldn't pass on that.

"You are dismissed 494" The Colonel didn't have to tell Alec twice as he saluted and walked towards the door before Lydecker could decide that he wanted a debrief directly from him, instead of the report.

Alec waited until he was outside the office and eyeshot to let the discomfort show on his face. Fighting her was a complete different matter to sparring. For example- 452 didn't give a damn if she caused permanent damage and the second he said how well adjusted he thought Logan was- she hit harder. What did 452 have to be self righteous about- it was her fault that her boyfriend was in Manticore. Typical 0'Niner- leaving destruction in her wake leaving others to fix her mess.

* * *

"It really is okay" Logan said after he caught Brin looking again. The words felt familiar and he wondered whether he had said them before to her… he turned his attention back to the computer and executed the command as Zack leaned over and gave a rare nod of approval.

It had turned out that two courses of simultaneous Psy ops seemed to have the effect of neutralizing each other. This explained firstly why Lydecker had not put Brin back in Psy Ops and why she hadn't been allowed off base. The most recent scans had showed that Brin was Brin again. Not anymore. Some careful doctoring and a backdoor to anything stored on the system and it looked like she was still 734- drone.

Zack only now allowed his stance to relax slightly. "Now we have something that Lydecker doesn't know about- but we can't get complacent, we need to use this- Brin you should head back to the barracks"

The Korean X5 winced but she followed out his order and Zack followed her out.

Logan began to shut it down, they had chosen the early hours but they still needed sleep. Colonel Lydecker was on base and Logan was finding it hard enough not to show defiance. Of late it seemed to be some new game the Colonel was playing, to supervise the training and then single him out. The Colonel would give the rarest praise just like Zack and the frustrating part was Logan knew it was designed to get to him. And Logan could feel- even without Psy Ops that his mind was beginning to slip.

Logan walked through the passage back to his cell as he dwelled on what he had read and… seen with Alec. Dragging him back to the cell- the Psy Op sessions. Logan could feel the bile rise up within him. Alec hadn't blown the mission out of inability… 494 had fallen in love. Logan couldn't imagine what it would be like not to have 452 to hold onto, hope. 494 had fought and disobeyed Command to try and save Rachel Berrisford. As the soldier inside of him felt disdain for 494's actions- Logan felt admiration for it.

A movement caused Logan to turn quickly and he relaxed at what he saw. "The guards didn't feed them?"

Joshua gave an angry growl. "Guards too busy hurting them to feed them" Joshua made a habit of stealing the scraps that would usually be disposed off from the mess and feeding the transhumans down here when the guards neglected them.

Logan frowned and reached out a hand to touch the nasty burn that Joshua sported on his shoulder. Joshua flinched at first, but then relaxed "Looks like they hurt you too- come on they have some old medical supplies around here"

"Was trying to help Isaac- they hurt Joshua because Isaac hurt them" Joshua was very still and Logan felt if there were no other victories- that at least the solider medic training they gave him could be put for some good.

* * *

A dream with a cityscape out the window had morphed into drowning inside the Tank- unable to move upwards. As Logan returned to his cell, he could still feel his heart pounding. Before getting shot in that Live Ordinance drill- he had two other sessions- to bring him up to speed. But it was the watery exercise that sent fear through him. A bullet could be dodged- drowning could not. And as he lay there- Logan became aware almost instantly that someone else was inside the cell.

Logan turned and leaned back against the wall quickly. Because standing in the corner was 452. He couldn't hear her speak- she wasn't speaking. 452 gave a small smile and Logan tried to move- he couldn't. It was like the sound of his blood pumping had become a roar.

She walked over to him. " It's okay Logan"

Logan snapped awake at the sound of the door opening and the guard using his designation.

All in his head. It was worse this way than if the guard had used the tazer to wake him up. Because every time it turned out to have been just in his mind- his hopes of getting out of here faded a little bit more and it was getting darker by the second.

* * *

_**Seattle, Washington**_

* * *

It had been a detail she needed in theory. But sitting in Logan's wheelchair was like tearing open a scar that had never really healed. In it, Max felt powerless for real- the same feeling she had known Logan felt about not being able to walk- being incomplete… she was incomplete.

"What can I tell you- you're not in the system"

Max glared at the man, finding it not too hard to find frustration to show this complete and utter tool. Dirt was matted through her hair- her clothes were ratted and torn. The best old wound- was actually for real- a dark angry healing cut- that looked as if it were old and it ran across her jaw line. The pain she felt was very real as well. It was like good old Deck had known she'd have to play in character. And Max actually had inserted herself in the system and even pretended she hadn't noticed him delete it before he got to her number. Right on cue.

" Don't you pull that crap- not after what the military took. They promised new locations and a great salary just last year- next thing I know ten minutes in the field in Israel- my ass is shot and then they land in me in a V.A in Gillette, Wyoming and I'm told I'm never going to walk again"

The man wasn't even trying. "There's nothing here sweetheart"

Max tipped her head back, grimacing and then looked at him. "I'm in there- check again… without that V.A. ration card I can't eat- go back in the file room for all I care, and find the paper with my name on it"

"Look- you want your ration card… it's simple" He rubbed his fingers together and Max could barely suppress the smile. She had hoped this jerk would play it this way. "I'll put you in the system- that easy…"

She leaned back and gave a nod to the woman who was right across the room just, waiting for that nod. Asha Barlowe got on top of a desk and fired a shot upwards with the gun she'd been concealing so well.

"All right, people. We're the S1W. We're here to set this thing straight." As Asha's people came in, the veterans began to cheer. "Nobody's gonna get hurt, nobody is gonna pay for what they already have coming, and nobody is gonna leave here without their ration cards"

Max pulled the man from the desk and threw him on the floor, standing. "I used to have a friend that was a vet" she said sweetly leaning in.

_That's for you Theo. No one is gonna shake down vets on my watch._

* * *

"Thanks for helping us make our point"

Max poured through the documents they had lifted. "No problem… I'll pass the incriminating stuff to Eyes Only… and it helps with the saving Logan part" It had come with the added bonus of having the plans to the Manticore base ninety miles out- or the VA hospital as it was known on the books. Max traced her finger across the layout of the Manticore base. Trying to ignore the pit that came with the territory. It was not as if she minded working with Asha- it was coming back to Logan's old apartment after getting another piece towards getting him back. Because at the end of Eyes Only assignments- Logan would cook, talk to her… or sometimes he'd work while she talked. And Logan wasn't here this time, and he had not been here for a while.

Asha looked out the window and then back to Max. "You really care about him don't you?"

"I love him… and finding a way into Manticore and out is the only way to save him and my brother"

"You're messing with powerful people- they play rough"

_Tell me something I don't know. _"It doesn't matter… I can't give up on them, they're my family" Max felt her throat close a little and turned her attention back to the plans. There had to be a way in that wasn't one way. She had to give this the time it needed- rushing in half assed was only going to give Lydecker what he wanted.

"At least you know they are alive"

Max looked up at Asha. "The deal with Manticore is that death is better than anything they have in store for you … they break you and leave your body as some kind of twisted shell"

_She had to send Bling to the other room. It wasn't as if he had not volunteered to do this for her… but Lydecker would take something from knowing it wasn't her behind the synthesized voice. Like she couldn't do this. It was just under three weeks ago the mission to take down Manticore had gone so wrong and she couldn't handle not having Logan around. Max could feel her stomach turn at the sight of him through the camera. He had reached out through an old contact. Max now knew Logan had gone behind her back with Ben- and contacted Lydecker. Lydecker the master of the mind screw- had preyed on it and sent some lovely pictures… Knowing about it now from Bling- just made Max wonder what was wrong with Logan. Contacting Lydecker- stupid. But the time in the forest- that killer, a wolf in sheep's clothing was one of her least shining moments- anyone else, maybe even Original Cindy would have run for the hills._ _But Logan had handled it and better than most despite knowing what she had done. He saw her, and not Manticore. And that was why she could forgive him for it._

"_What do you want Donald Lydecker"_

_Lydecker seemed unfazed as the blindfold came off and the person in the surveillance room disappeared. Only Max and Lydecker. "Drop the pretense Max- I know Mr. Cale was Eyes Only"_

_Max knew if she'd been in room, she would have snapped Lydecker's neck. "Was- you… killed him?" The synthesized voice could hold no anger and of this Max was glad. No matter how emotional she got- Lydecker couldn't get the satisfaction. But did it matter if Logan was- no he couldn't be dead. A part of her knew he was still alive, that he wasn't really gone._

"_No. On the contrary Mr. Cale is being made into an asset for Manticore'_

"_An asset how?" Max didn't feel the relief she had thought she would, knowing for sure and not depending on some new age type feeling to know that Logan was alive._

"_A soldier… and it's all due to Dr. Vertes and you Max"_

_Max couldn't respond- she supposed this was how it felt like to have a piano dropped on you or something. Lydecker showed no change in tone, no emotion but Max knew what a great day this was for him._

"_When work was started on augmenting soldiers- it was always presumed they would be random- individuals completely without any potential, but Logan has character and everything I would need from a soldier under my command… that is after we eliminate the flaws"_

_He didn't have to tell her what they were. Logan's ability for empathy- his need to help people no matter the personal cost, his self sacrifice- twisted and bent by Manticore- by good ol' Deck. " So what- you did this to gloat… the only difference between you and Renfro was she didn't give a damn. You do and that makes you sick… don't try to get in contact with Eyes Only again Deck… I will kill you- I'm just hoping Zack beats me to it." _

"_You are going to watch Max- what I do to him" Max's finger hovered on the button that would end the transmission. " Just remember- you brought this on yourself and him"_

"… and then they use it against you" The S1W leader left Max, and she looked around the apartment. She hated Logan for making her give a damn, hated Zack for making her realize she had to. And right now, Max needed to hate them for not being here now. Because Max needed to keep going.

* * *

_**Manticore**_

* * *

All that was needed was to act the exact way that every soldier and trainer thought she would. The perfect drone. But when the mats came out and Brin found that she was paired off to spar with Biggs and it was self control that kept her from fighting any way but without passion.

But she could work with that.

The trainers were all standing back- and Alec knew it was not any sign of faith especially where Zack was concerned. It was more of keeping out of the way to avoid injury and to observe their sparring- to keep it from getting out of hand.

He flashed a self-assured look to his partner. "Don't worry Logan… you are going to eat floor- but it's nothing to be ashamed of here"

"Do you remember her name?" Alec had a bad feeling as he studied Logan. His face seemed to be set on something even as he moved into position. "Rachel's"

Alec's face hardened and he tried to hide the anger that the name elicited from anyone but his own head. " Stop it right there- it will not end well 208" How did Logan even know anything- not even Biggs knew the whole freak show.

He had avoided using the designation- and hoped its rare usage would shut Logan up- or at least warn him off.

"You loved-" Logan's words were cut short as Alec slammed his elbow into his middle. Logan fell to his knees as the wind was knocked out him.

Leaning down, Alec was at ear level with Logan. "What would you know Logan- I mean can you even remember 452's name… come on… tell me" Alienating, losing Logan's loyalty vanished for Alec in the flash of an eye. This was the core of the issue- and because of Rachel, he was the one who could get through to Logan.

Next thing Alec knew, Logan had spring boarded to his feet and kicked him backwards. And what Alec saw in Logan's eyes was worse than any kind of hate could be. Pity- pity for something that he couldn't possibly understand.

"They killed her... but that doesn't matter does it-" Alec caught Logan's fist and twisted his arm- Logan kicked him across the back forcing them apart and they circled each other.

Alec touched his mouth and smiled, when he saw the blood on his fingertips. "Not bad… but I seem to have the higher score" Logan's blooded nose and the rapid bruising down his arm made Alec's split lip almost non existent. "All 452 ever did was betray you- why do you think you're here instead of her?"

The older man actually waited until he had made his move. Logan felt Alec's arm close over his throat and did a one-eighty flip behind Alec. "She wouldn't- but you betrayed Rachel…and that makes you her ki-"

An inhumane growl emanated from Alec and he head butted Logan.

"452 left you behind…" Alec whispered as a guard looked their way -

Logan retaliated by feinting a fall, and sweeping his leg under Alec's legs making the X5 crash to the ground. A part of him was terrified because the soldier was in control now and all he could think of was to beat 494 into the ground. And he was letting it happen. _All that's necessary for the triumph of evil… TAKE ADVANTAGE OF WEAKNESS… _

But Alec was better- and the fight soon turned in the other direction and all Logan could get in was defensive blows- to try to get the upper hand back. Alec didn't give him a chance- and like his prediction- Logan ended up eating mat- figuratively... literally. As the whistle blew- Alec offered a hand to Logan. "All you have to do is trust me Logan"

"I can't" The struggle was etched across Logan's face. Alec was wondering what the hell did 452 do inspire this kind of loyalty- with everything that had happened, what made 452 so damn special? Logan's expression vanished as the drill sergeant walked past them. Logan was destroying himself over his feelings for 452.

And Alec knew with a weight in his chest, that there was nothing he could do. If it were Rachel, no matter what loyalty he felt for Manticore- he'd try to save her. No way to win.

"Much improved 208… X5 846! Get to your feet soldier and report to the infirmary," Everyone's eyes went to Biggs who was shades of black and blue and lying at Brin's feet and Brin to her credit had no reaction to the sight. Zack, however had a dangerous, but amused glint in his eyes. Brin was the only one- besides him to have trained on the outside- with a natural talent that went past genetics.

Biggs slowly got to his feet, in obvious pain and glared at the Korean X5 with a cold intensity.

"Perhaps you should report to the infirmary 846" Brin said without emotion. The glare from Biggs grew colder.

"208- assist X5 846 to the infirmary"

Zack paid closer attention. No guard- at all. Just ordering Logan as if he were any loyal soldier to escort a fellow soldier. Either Lydecker thought that Logan was indoctrinated enough not to try something or the bastard had something planned. The bastard had something planned.

* * *

When Logan and Biggs got to the infirmary, the doctor that was on call took a look at them and went back to his computer- waving them over to a bed.

"Hope it's a damn good crossword puzzle" Biggs muttered and winced from the pain in his jaw. "734- hits hard… are you going to stay and hold my hand?" he asked, batting his eyes at Logan determined to get some enjoyment out of this experience. Not that it seemed Logan hadn't gotten unscathed during sparring. "So I saw- between getting kicked around by Lydecker's pet that you didn't hit like a girl for once"

Logan smiled sardonically. "And you know I just live for your validation" It always amused Biggs that when Logan was doing sarcasm it wasn't obvious. It masqueraded more as something amusing. Biggs liked being obvious.

"You know it 'baby'" Biggs sighed. "Okay serious time, part of the reason I got so thoroughly whipped was on account of listening in and I can only assume some idiot put you unsupervised in a room with a computer" Logan stayed silent. "Alec only does what he does because he gives a damn- even the mind game crap"

"I know"

As Logan left the infirmary he could hear Biggs milking the genuine pain for all it was worth. They weren't just the enemy… Logan knew that. And if it was just about preserving the other Logan- he could almost let go. But there was more at stake. Zack and Brin- the loyalty he felt for them. And no matter what the Colonel did- Logan still loved 'her'. He had to fight this.

Logan frowned as he caught a glimpse of dark hair and those eyes. He looked around and then steadily walked to the door leading out of the corridor. 452 stared back at him, and smiled slightly and moved forward towards the exit.

It didn't sit right. 452 turned back to him and Logan could see a guard approaching her from behind with the tazer. Logan called out a warning at the same time as he used the military hand signal. 452 took the guard out and continued down the hall towards the passage that led outside.

Even if this was all in his head- and 494 had knocked him out, he still had to see this through.

When they got outside Manticore's main building , 452 walked towards the forest. Logan used a burst of speed to catch up with her.

"There are X7s in there- we'll never made it out"

452 nodded, and smiled reassuringly. "Don't worry Logan, their commands have been altered- it's safe" When she squeezed his hand, leaning in close- her lips brushed his face. She then darted into the woods and Logan paused for a second. Some of the gloss from her lips had rubbed off on the side of his face. It smelled of strawberries.

Logan followed her, and true to her word the X7s merely walked straight past them. He expected something other than silence- but the X5 didn't say a word and all she did was make sure that he was right behind her.

The fence came into sight- and Logan looked around at the apparently clear path out of Manticore, the one that would lead back to the real world. Was it even real anymore- or just something that was in his head.

Logan walked up to the fence and stared at the wire. It was almost real- this situation. Logan could remember the dreams that 452 would rescue him... that he would escape and make it back to her.

"How far…"

"To Seattle- Logan don't you remember… it'll be a few hours drive-"

Logan interrupted her and turned his back on the fence. He stared at her. They had gotten it so right, down to the jacket, gloves- and she looked just like 452. Forcing it now seemed harder than just going along, to play the part hoping to get the chance to escape.

_God- Logan, I'm so sorry._

_Me too._

He was tired. Tired of playing by what Manticore set only to fade, and if he didn't they would make him fade away anyway. Now they were trying to use someone like her to make him- to betray what was left of him? "I know... you must be her clone- how far were you going to let me get"

453 dropped the pretense almost immediately. "I'm wired so the TACs will be here in moments" She stared at him, the reason she'd been pulled off her deep cover for three days. And she had to know. "What gave it away 208?"

"I'm not going to run the math- it'll just make things worse" The air had gotten colder, and more frigid as the sun began to dip beneath the clouds and the beginning of the first evening of winter set in.

Within moments, the TACs had surrounded the area but they were yet to move in. A hummer pulled up from the dirt trail, and Colonel Lydecker stepped out. 453 turned away and walked to the Colonel and saluted. He walked straight past her- and Logan understood. To the Colonel- more than any of the other clones… 453 was just a shadow of the real thing.

"Salute soldier"

The hand went up halfway, but Logan dropped his arm. "Does it matter… I'm going to Psy Ops- it's the only reason you would have set this up" Months ago- Logan's voice would have been confrontational and without a pause. Now- Logan sounded more resigned than anything else. Logan was at his breaking point and Donald Lydecker intended to finish the job.

Colonel Lydecker didn't react and didn't seem to show any emotion besides something in his eyes. Some hidden, twisted sense of pride. "The pursuit of 452 is taking too long- and your actions Logan, have proved that complete reprogramming is the only recourse of action" The reprimand- and the use of his name made Logan stiffen as two TAC soldiers came up behind him and he felt the cold sting of a needle on his neck. Logan felt his limbs grown heavy. He wouldn't get a chance to struggle this time. And there would be no reprieve.

* * *

Zack had fallen slightly behind the unit as they left the mess hall. For the rest of the day- his mind was elsewhere- with the unfortunate side effect of behaving like a good soldier for Command. It seemed almost certain Logan had been dragged away by Lydecker – so the bastard could screw with his head. What Zack didn't expect was at three thirty in the morning for Logan to still not have been returned to his cell.

When Brin appeared in his cell, she was completely silent until they had reached the basement. "Zack… Lydecker had Logan sent to Psy Ops- a complete reprogramming evaluation" Brin caught sight of Zack's face turning to stone. "The orders were already signed… whatever Lydecker did- made Logan do… there was only one outcome"

Zack started down the passage, ignoring the transhumans completely, ignoring everything else. Brin caught up with him and found the strength to yank him back. "Zack, if you watch this… there's no point, what are you going to get"

"I let them turn you, I failed you…if anyone is responsible for Tinga's death it's on me. If I had gotten Logan on board a year ago- I could have gotten him and Max out of Seattle. But all I could see was a threat instead of the ally Logan Cale was" Zack felt his fists clench.

"I was jealous of Logan… the same way I was of Tinga's husband- because Max and Tinga didn't need me the way the others did" Zack gave a forced, mirthless laugh. "More of Logan than Charlie Smith"

"Do you… love Max?" Brin asked hesitantly.

Zack shook his head. "Not like that. She's my sister Brin … to face facts- Logan had a normal life and he threw it away for us- if he hadn't gotten the warning out, we all would have been captured. I have to do this, if there's a chance to save his mind after Lydecker's through with him"

Even if there wasn't a chance at all. Zack had to try.

* * *

_**Space Needle, Seattle.**_

* * *

Max put the cell down and stared at it, and then out at the city. Her chance. The one chance in this whole nightmare to save Zack and Logan.

_Every day I wished for this. It's hard not knowing if it will even work- but I wouldn't want to know if it was hopeless. Because I need to save them- to have that chance. _

_I said standing here, that that the world would be different for both of us. That's my fault- but Logan's going to come back. I know that Zack can fight them for a month longer, but how much longer can Logan hold on? That's when my shot comes. In one month. _

_I don't know what I'll find. But I do know that I'll have to face it._

_**

* * *

**_

_**To Be Continued…**_

* * *

It's not cruel to leave the last chapter of the year on that note is it? And the tune in my head was that creepy end tune for 'Hit A Sista Back'

I will try to keep up the inspiration to write the chapter that answers the little things like will Logan stop being Logan and become 208… and hopefully that will be up by January's end.

Of course reviews help the, keeping interested process… and I've never reached a fanfiction at least chapter 9 before. So please review… and uncut Logan/Alec fight scene without the shirts DVD extras, bare-chested for those who get the strawberries being wrong part!

And Merry Christmas/Yuletide or whatever everyone celebrates.

* * *

Chapter Completed 22/16/09 or 16/22/09; Year of the Pulse.


	9. A Promise To Be Kept

Disclaimer: Really? Okay I don't own Dark Angel. Done said, a million times over. Well this makes nine actually. This is not the final chapter but it does get to and go past a crossroads of sort. And no matter how tempting- please do not skip to the end of the chapter- it'll cheapen it whichever way it ends up going.

For anyone who has missed episodes early season one- Max seems to have something for the flavor cherry- bubblegum and lip balm/gloss. Makes sense too – it's not just sweet exactly it's also kind of tangy and bitter... it suits Max down to the letter... Logan was captured in the June of 2020- so this makes it about seven months. The date is right. (And Max is now the second primary character in the fic, still Logan centric but with 50 percent more Max for your buck)

* * *

**Chapter Nine**

**A Promise To Be Kept**

* * *

_**January 2021 - **__**Seattle, Washington**_

* * *

Crash had used to be one of the places that Max had as part of her daily routine. After a long, hard day of listening to Normal, and occasionally high tailing it because someone didn't like their package- it was fun to just kick around with friends.

But now as Max Guevera stepped into Crash, all she could see was the way things used to be. And how much better it would have been if she had just told Logan how she'd felt- what isn't and maybe- never would be. If only she could that year over.

Max fought down the doubt and looked around. She smiled. Original Cindy was playing pool… and with the once celibate Chrisette. This was new.

She walked up to the pool table and smiled. "Hey"

The lickety-chick smiled back. "I'm just going to get some beer- okay Cindy" Now the kiss the blonde left was anything but platonic. Like she was staking her territory or something.

"Lickety-boo hooked up with me up the other night and we spent all night talkin' it out"

"That's great…" Max's expression froze a little. She hadn't seen her best friend look this happy since Diamond and it was making her feel low. How could she unload that- this time tomorrow if things went sideways she could be dead or back in the cage? On the other hand- Max knew that she couldn't just vanish on Cindy without a word. "Look OC- you know how I got that tip on a way into Manticore?"

"Yeah, the former wicked witch, had an window in' incase she had to bail in hurry and she needed somethin' in there- and you wanna try and use it to rescue Logan and your brother"

Max nodded and looked over at the bar, it was slow and Chrisette was already headed back to them "Well it all checks out…and the window is tonight, I meant to tell you earlier but I…" And this was why Max hadn't told her. The worry etched into Original Cindy's face as if it'd been there all night.

Chrisette set the beer and a new glass down. "Want to play next Max- I'm always up to add to the casualty list"

Max shook her head "Another time maybe… I have to blaze"

"Max!" Original Cindy crossed her arms. "Be careful, aiight?"

Max nodded as she turned away but she paused and went back, hugging Cindy. If she was going to go down all in a blaze- at least she wasn't holding back. And knowing she had friends waiting for her to come home would just make her fight that much harder.

She just hoped Logan remembered he had a life to come back to. That he existed outside of Manticore.

For the better part of a year- Max had been trying to keep her mind focused instead of crying in a corner like she was one of those girls who fell apart because they lost someone they loved.

"_Go ahead, I'll be right behind you" Logan smiled. "I promise"_

Who was she kidding? The only reason- Max had gotten up because if she didn't- then Zack and Logan would be in Manticore forever. She had justified being Eyes Only as someone had to do it. That Logan wouldn't want it to just fall apart without him. But deep down Max knew she was conning herself- she gave a damn what happened to people. Always had- her family had taught her to care. But Logan had made her face it. From the day they'd met- it felt like Max had known him all her life.

_Just like one of those sappy romance novels you find on the ground- they don't even make for good insulation from the elements._

Max straddled her motorcycle, the hair off her face. She revved up, and drove towards the old airfield outside of Sector 21. But even with the six hundred ccs of raw power between her legs, and the freedom riding her baby gave her… her mind couldn't help but dwell on what it always did. If she could pull this off successfully- what about Lydecker? After all the hell, and all the crap Deck had put everyone through- maybe it would be better to deal with Lydecker. For good this time and make sure he could never do anything, to anybody again.

But if she did that- Lydecker would win. Morality just plain sucked.

* * *

_**Manticore**_

* * *

_Help me- just put a bullet in me, save me, shoot me, end it, stop please… stop, 452, make it stop. _

The torture would never end- the illogical nightmare drove into Logan's mind to the point he felt as if it would fall out. That his mind would drain out of his ears and leave him hollow.

His body tried to arc upwards but the restraints barely bent under the pressure. The red laser burned into his mind. The images hit his mind like a knife's edge, drilling as if a moment from ending him.

Not a moment to breathe in this place- the four walls a living nightmare. Logan could barely feel the tears fall down his face, until his eyes were dry. He wanted to feel them running down his face- that he could feel. He so desperately needed to know he could still feel that- he wasn't gone.

In here, Logan could never close his eyes, never let go with his mind. He fought against the rip in his mind that threatened to swallow him whole.

In the cell- just closing his eyes for a moment- the reprieve was always too short. He let his guard down- he would wake back to his hell. Unable to move, unable to focus. So Logan took to fighting the rest he needed like it was waters he couldn't drink. The second the guards entered the cell- Logan attacked them blindly with no restraint.

As the day drew in… a day…they appeared the same and Logan snapped again. He could barely feel the impact of what he did. That a fist broke a man's ribs. That he made blood stain the ground. That the sickening crack was a broken neck. And the colors rushed back in and Logan just fell to his knees and clawed at the ground screaming. On that day- they forced him down to Psy Ops. Restrained him and left him alone. And then Colonel Lydecker had arrived, leaning down.

"Stop fighting this Logan or more good men are going to die because of you"

It had taken a long time for Logan to even find words, to find a way to put a voice to them. Even as he opened his mouth- they came out as more of a rasp. "Stop… please, just make it stop" Each word cracked- and he lost reality as for a second- just a second- he saw her dark curls- her smile. And her pain.

"What …can I do?"

"_Stay with me…please"_

"…I'm right… here"

"_You won't leave?"_

"I'm not going…" Then Logan screamed- and he didn't know what the name was that came from his mouth but Colonel Lydecker seemed to, and deep down he knew it was her name. _Eyes, forever dark _– the other Logan whispered and he could barely hear it. He needed her, like the air and it felt like he was drowning. He just wanted her. Just to be there, to make this go away. It hurt too much to breathe without her.

The Colonel had then held his hand. "Just tell me where she is son; and she can be here with you"

The darkness came back, and Logan let the cohesion go- for her. She had to stay safe, 452 had to be safe, safe, safe… and Logan didn't even realize he was saying it over and over again like a broken loop. And they started again.

When they came for him, Logan stopped fighting them. One of them always had to get him to stand, but Logan would put that foot in front of the other and walk straight back to the nightmare.

Strapped down again- the images no longer burned but just 'were'. The pain being gone was as painful as the pain was itself.

Colonel Lydecker was there again, and Logan didn't even blink. He couldn't- they wouldn't let him.

"Soldiers do not show emotion X9 208- you will not show me emotion" He couldn't show a tear- not a single tear. Tears brought more pain. Logan just wished death would come and free him. He couldn't sleep; in his mind's dying state it was as if he let more of his sense of self fall away there would be nothing left. All Logan could think about was ending it- if it continued… he'd have nothing to live for.

One session, Logan's hand closed on a gun and he drew it to his head. And the Colonel just looked coldly and shook his head. Against his will the gun dropped from his grasp.

452 was always there in his cell, his hallucination clung to like a lifeline. Logan was falling apart at the seams and she was on the edge of a structure, and a city was beneath them. And she was holding onto his arm, as Logan felt the hole inside of him threaten to swallow him whole. And her grip was weakening.

Alec never thought he would find himself, helping Zack with anything. But it was against everything to just let a member of his unit fall alone. His unit. The reinstatement as CO was the end result of everything he had done to make up for his failure with the Berrisford assignment.

But even with that- be it Biggs, Cece or a temporary member like Logan and he'd be there every time. Even if it was only his unit because…

"Coast is clear- I'd say seven hours" Alec said, breaking his own line of thought.

He watched Zack's expression go black.

Seven hours- and all it had taken was Logan passing out from sheer overload. He should be in the infirmary- have a several day respite. But seemed Lydecker knew how close he was- and all it was… a matter of days, or just one good strike. Logan's survival - be damned- if Lydecker just got to turn him faster.

The cells here actually had bars from the ceiling to the ground, horizontal barred windows into the passage. Trapped. Zack had tried to get Lydecker's attention. And by that, Zack had stood in the middle of the lecture and started in on Biggs after baiting the X5 to insult him.

In response, Lydecker did nothing. And that was worse than Psy Ops- because Lydecker knew it hurt him more to have him stand by and watch someone he was responsible for be put through it. Zack had not dared to react again. When he had been recaptured for the first time Lydecker had made him watch a Psy Op session with Brin. But then- Lydecker had wanted the locations of the others and it was all about him.

This time- Lydecker could see an easier way to find the others. Break Logan Cale. Send him after Max and watch everything fall into place. Maybe Max could find a way to stand against the man she loved- but Lydecker wouldn't give her the chance.

Zack moved in front of Alec who hung back, as he opened the cell. The guard was looking the other way- and it hadn't taken much to bribe him. And Zack knew the reason Alec had done this, it was that Logan wouldn't even respond to him. In this state- Logan's trust was minimal and stretched to breaking point. No room for anybody ambiguous.

Nothing… no Lydecker had come into his cell in isolation. The bastard had offered a trade or the deal they both knew Zack would never take. Giving up Max was out of the question. Besides- Zack knew that Logan Cale or even the damaged version would feel the same. The point of the offer was to make him feel the guilt- that the day that X9 208 took over was to know he could have stopped it.

Zack could see Logan in the corner of the cell. The man had come to and was hunched over, and whispering.

It was not his own name, but muttering to himself- and it was all about Max. Describing what she looked like. And Zack knew what had pushed Logan to collapse under the reprogramming. They were trying to erase his feelings for her. Logan's green eyes were bloodshot, and he didn't even seem to notice that someone else was there.

Logan didn't fight him, and continued to whisper as Zack got him to move onto the hard ledge that worked as a ruse as a place to rest. It was hard and the material was rough and coarse. "You need to sleep"

The whispering stopped and Logan looked at him. "I can't"

"Yes you can" Zack knew his voice held a command, and that was counter- productive but if Logan faced another session without any sleep- he'd crack.

"If they take me back there Zack… I can't keep going through this"

Zack did the only thing he knew. He talked. This time it was not words of strength but the thing that Logan needed to hear the most- a lie. That if he just closed his eyes, when he woke up, that Max would be here. That it was all some nightmare- and they had all made it out of here that night. And then as he watched Logan's eyes close, Zack knew what he felt. And he hated it. Since their capture, Zack had used himself – to get Logan to fight Manticore. To keep him standing. But somewhere down the line… the former Eyes Only was older than him- but Zack felt the same protective feeling he did around the others. And that the sentimental weakness had no use. Even if it was how he felt.

"I knew Logan was headed there, it sucks- and if wishes came true it'd be 599 and I'd be so happy" Biggs sighed and gave an exaggerated shrug. "But we don't get what we want, like 734 to grow a personality… Alec" The other X5 glared after Biggs threw his boot at him. The boot had tracked through mud in the training session and was very ripe. "You were daydreaming Princess"

Alec shook his head. "That's no way to speak to your CO, Biggs"

Biggs raised an eyebrow and leaned on a bunk. " That's another thing- you should be ecstatic over that- I mean you earned it- even tempering your reports on Logan's integration and looking out for everyone like you always do"

"Of course I earned it" Alec snapped, and he left the room as Gem and Kiron entered.

She looked at Biggs. "What did you say now?" Gem asked bluntly. "You've never ticked him off before, 846" Gem tended to use barcodes while on base more often than not. She kept her head in the game- and was known to be in agony and still shooting her rounds off.

"I don't know- something's been up the last few days… maybe it's PMS" No reaction- damn 581 and the mission causing her absence. 361 was so dull by comparison. The other girls in the unit were okay but Biggs like the familiarity of his rapport with Cece.

His mood darkened as he dwelled on Alec's weird behavior. Biggs picked up his muddy boot and began to work on it. His brother was called into the Colonel's office and reinstated- and ever since he'd been acting as if there was something seriously messed up about this beyond the surface.

That or 494 was really going through PMS due to some weird genetic malfunction.

* * *

Matt Sung hadn't been happy about being left in the defensive. Max kept her eyes on the dark landscape beneath them as the helicopter flew towards its target. Matt could hold his own- but somebody had to protect the informant net if this all blew up in her face.

She glanced at her pilot. Yassen Ryjenko was the father of one of the girls she and Logan had saved from Gerhardt Bronck. Max hadn't wanted a pilot with family but even she could see the high point of Matt's choice. It meant- he'd be there the second he needed to be and he wanted to help her.

And the Blue Lady knew Max had been screwed over by people enough for the next ten lifetimes.

"Are you sure you don't want me to stay for an extra five minutes if you are slow to get there?"

Max shook her head. "If you don't see me within the two minutes haul this bird out of here- because it'll mean I'm not coming"

And that Renfro got her last laugh from the grave and that she shouldn't have saved her trump card from Lydecker. A way to get back in was right. Elizabeth Renfro had been brought in by a now passed away member of the Committee who had built into the security a way to slip back into Manticore and out. Every five months – there was a computer file dump- that took little things like radar out and the security feeds went offline. Not that anyone could tell because the feeds jammed on a loop for around three quarters an hour. The three quarters before radar came back. So Max had forty five minutes to disable the radar, and get Zack and Logan out. Like clockwork. Thank god for the passage that ran along the cells on the lowest sub levels. It meant all Max had to do was get there and find them and stick her radar-loving computer virus into Manticore's network. It was still a damn long shot.

Ryjenko checked his position. "Two minutes" He moved the helicopter to a higher altitude and Max moved to the back. She checked the gliding equipment, and her safety line. The back of the helicopter opened up and Max counted down, three… two… one-

Max dropped out of the helicopter breaking the line and steered the hand glider. She dropped slowly, and silently. There were only two guards on the top of the building. Max fell right onto the first one knocking him out and broke the hand of the other TAC who was reaching for his radio. "Sorry, this isn't your night" She reached back and pulled out a roll of duct tape. "Close your mouth" When she moved away the two guards were so tightly bound together- that circulation in an hour might be a problem. Downsides of working for the bad guy- Max certainly wasn't going to waste sleep on the two idiots who'd been playing cards.

She took the radio, and then plugged in an ear piece. And now she could hear every status change. The best part? The guards up here had the easy job and only reported in once an hour, and that had been ten minutes ago. Max stuck the beacon to the middle of the roof and then slipped in Manticore.

Getting to the stairwell had been hard. Just her luck, 494 had been moving out and had almost caught sight of her. He looked distant and Max felt her stomach turn. _Raising his gun, 494 fired. There was no gasp, or last words as Bling's body hit the ground. Stepping over the body as if it were nothing- Max lined her motorcycle up and drove forward throwing 494 forward about thirty feet. She grabbed Bling's body and slung his body over her front and accelerated. She stopped once she knew she was clear and realized his eyes were open. Max held his body as she stepped off the bike, and her shoulders began to shake-_

494 was just one of Manticore's oversimplified X5s with no conscience. Max ran down the stairwell and found the late hour worse in a way. The snow outside, it was a month until the anniversary of the escape. And she could be spending it in Psy Ops. _Snap out of it. _The last thing Max needed was to give herself was a headache. Not until she was actually screwed.

Max stepped into the isolation section. Only four guards but then most of the X's locked up here were for minor infractions. Besides they were all locked up tightly in their cells. She avoided the guards- moving in as they moved past. Max quickly moved to the cell which ran directly next to the passage. She pushed the metal bunk up and frowned as she pulled out a notebook. Max frowned and shoved it back into place. The bricks were out of place as well. Someone was using it. She was too far committed to turn back now- if this was a trap- Lydecker would already have men on the exits. Max lay on her stomach and slid into the opening and dropped down the pipe.

"Convenient" And her next words were cut off by the elbow pining her to the wall. Brin's face was partly in the shadows and a lion faced… nomilie appeared from the shadows.

"What are you doing here 453" Brin looked back to the dogman. "Joshua, easy" she said as he growled threateningly.

Max gripped the elbow at her chest. "Stop it it's me Max"

Brin gave a derisive snort but she pulled out a hand gun and aimed it at Max. "Come on" The tip of the gun, was strangely enough the least disconcerting. There was now only twenty nine minutes left of her window and she had no idea where Brin and 'Joshua' were taking her. Past the group of cells where all the creatures from Ben's stories shrieked and clawed.

Max looked at Joshua who was still growling at her. "Easy big fella"

Joshua stopped growling ""You, relax… little fella" It somehow it made him look, she didn't know, more vulnerable and less like a nomilie. Max offered a tentative smile. "I dig your teeth can I see 'em?"

"Brin put the gun down, it's Max" Zack stepped from the shadows and Max barely notice the gun fall away as Brin hugged her from behind.

Max pulled away. "Okay- something's going on here but we don't have much time, so give me the digest version…"

"Time- so you didn't just walk in here and say 'here I am' to Lydecker" Zack's eyes hardened. "You have any idea how much hell we went through to keep Lydecker away from you? - fine, Brin isn't one of them and Lydecker sent Logan to Psy Ops to be reprogrammed to go after you" Zack glared. "But he really shouldn't have bothered"

Max shut her thoughts down even as her heart beat faster at the fear the knowledge gave her. It was the only way she could focus here. "Zack, and I know this sounds weird coming from me but mind in the game now, in approximately twenty six minutes a helicopter will land on the roof on this building- that's our two minute window out. The camera feed is on a loop that will end also in twenty six minutes" Max pulled out the disc from her vest pocket. "This once in the system will screw their radar up and make us invisible as we leave… at which point you can yell at me and call me a bad soldier…in oh no twenty five minutes"

A silence stretched and Zack took the disk and handed it to Brin. "Brin, load it up and then get yourself to this rendezvous point… which leaves you and me to go retrieve Logan"

"Max" Brin stepped forward, and Max looked back to her sister. "I'm sorry for everything little sister… if I'd just been able to say yes then…"

Shaking her head, Max smiled. "It's okay… we'll catch up when we're flying outta here"

Max had slipped back, to let Zack lead the way. She knew the layout back to front but Zack actually knew which cell they held Logan in. Now that Zack was leading the way, Max felt the sting of the words. She knew asking Zack how Logan was would be a mistake. But she needed to know that- she wasn't… too late by a day, a week…

"Is Logan still-"

"It was good timing Max… Logan couldn't have held on much longer" Zack looked at her quickly to gauge her reaction to the next part. "Lydecker isn't on base- he left for a few hours"

Max felt relief and disappointment in the same breath. More disappointment- and anger. How dare Lydecker be absent when she found the strength to snap his sorry neck once and for all? To stop him from hurting her family ever again… "Max… Logan's not with it- Lydecker was putting him through Psy Ops at various stages and constantly for the last month- he's broken"

"Then I'll fix him"

Zack needed Max to keep her focus- and that meant not getting into this now. One way or another- Max had found a way in- and a way for them to all get out. It didn't mean he would give out praise- in any instance the mission was yet to be completed Everything else could be put on hold. Her reaction to Lydecker's absence relieved him. At least the next time they got the chance- Max wasn't going to get in his way. She finally got it- Lydecker was far too great a threat to be left alive.

"You know what bums me out" Max said, as they paused to wait for a janitor to pass without seeing them. "I saw Captain Dick tonight- and I couldn't beat him into a pulp"

Zack couldn't help a slight upwards turn of his mouth. "494" Max nodded, smirking. "It suits him"

* * *

Placing the disk in the tray- Brin pushed it in. Max hadn't known she was free of the brainwashing… but she had still risked a lot on just, maybe having Zack to help her and watch her back.

"Zack not happy to see Max… Max-x" Joshua played with the name.

Brin shook her head. "He's happy on the inside…I think, it's just the risk she took…Maxie seems to take a lot of stupid risks" Like coming after her when those rogue army soldiers tried to sell her to the Chinese. What would her decision be now? If Brin could go back to that moment- she wanted to believe that she would tell Zack and Max to just keep driving like she should have. Brin waited for it to load and turned around to the transhuman. "Joshua, you could come with us … I know you'd have to stay inside a lot but you should be able to see more than just this place- there's a whole world out there"

"Joshua outside… outside with Brin?" Joshua seemed to retreat a little. "No… Joshua can't- no one will look after others down here, Isaac… Joshua has to look out for little brother"

"I understand" Brin said, and she was surprised to find how sad she was about it. Joshua was so innocent and back before the reprogramming and then after it was gone- she had thought about it. Showing Joshua the world with all its color. "Can you do me a favor and look out for Ben… he shouldn't be alone either"

Joshua nodded proudly and Brin put her attention back on the screen. She executed the sole command available. "Come on- Joshua, I'll get you back to your room… when we leave I don't want Lydecker to take it out on you"

* * *

Her heart beat a little faster and harder as they approached Psy Ops. It was hurting her inside as she thought about the recordings of Logan and her own childhood experiences.

Zack knocked the solitary guard out and retrieved the handgun. "Second cell to the right" Zack told her as he checked how many bullets he had to work with.

Max stepped into the barred room, as Zack kept look out. Logan's appearance was so… different. There was no color in his face, and he was shaking in a fistful rest, more like unrest. "Logan" she whispered into his ear. "Come on, it's okay… I'm here now"

He opened his eyes and Max had to stop herself from reacting. It was like something in Logan was just not together anymore- and it scared her how much she recognized the look. From the mirror the days that she could swear Manticore was just behind her shoulder. When she was scared, and despaired she'd never be free of them.

"I wish… you were here"

Max found her hand tracing down his face where his beard should be. He seemed naked without it, the glasses. "Can't you feel that? I'm real I promise"

Logan closed his eyes and turned away from her. "No you're not" He didn't believe her. Whatever Lydecker had been doing- he'd driven Logan to the point that obviously- he couldn't trust his own eyes anymore.

And it really pushed Max's buttons. Where was the Logan Cale that argued with her- that learned to stand up to his own family- who called her on everything she pulled… the Logan who told her she had nothing to be ashamed of?

"That's it!" Max said and crossed her arms as she stood. "Right now you can't believe I'm real… that this is just another mind-trip served up by the Anti-Christ. Well it's not true. I'm here Logan because I came to save you, I'm here and I'm not going anywhere… and if that means when Deck comes in tomorrow he finds me here… so be it!"

Something in the way 452 spoke, made Logan know- that somehow, impossibly… that his dream might just be real this time. 453 was nice, his hallucination was only comforting- but the 452 he held on to- this was her.

Logan got up slowly. Or, he struggled to and Max went to his side before he could fall on his face. "I'm here Logan, it's going to be okay"

"452?" The designation hit Max worse than a bullet to the heart and it took all she had to not flinch on the outside. The same as the day that Lydecker had rocked up at that genetics conference-except it was somehow much more important not to react. He didn't say it like Manticore did, he said it the same way he had said her name in the past. That made it harder.

Max nodded. "It's me…come on Logan let's go home"

Logan suddenly looked panicked "I…" It seemed hard for him to admit it and he looked away. "I don't know where home is- I'm sorry"

"You have nothing to be sorry for… or ashamed of- you taught me that" Max helped him out of the cell as she glanced at her timer. "Zack, we have sixteen minutes left"

Zack nodded sharply and moved forward as they moved through to the stairwell. Someone was on it. Max moved out of sight and as the door opened, Zack raised the gun and then he drew it back. "I told you to get to the roof"

"Not without you" Brin said simply and she switched guns with Zack, she had picked up a semi automatic. The group moved forward and up the stairs towards the top level. Max felt her heart drop as she saw 494 on the top step as he looked at them. He clapped.

"Very nice 452"

Brin blurred forward, and caught him over the stairs and made him fall to the last landing. She high kicked him across the face- giving Zack the chance to drop in behind Alec. As Alec drove a fist to hit Brin, Zack caught it. Brin whipped out her handcuffs and Alec founds his arms cuffed to the railing behind him.

Max looked down. "Sorry 494… I guess you shouldn't have opened that big mouth of yours" She threw down the half used roll of duct tape and Brin caught it.

"Give a minute- I'll catch up, I'll secure 494 here" Brin added tape around Alec's arms.

"So, I guess congratulations are in order huh, 'Brin'…" Alec spat.

Brin looked up from where she had been tying his ankles and she looked up. Her dark eyes scrutinized him. "You aren't stupid Alec, why didn't you report us- you were waiting to do it" He didn't say anything. "I was there Alec – I heard what Lydecker said"

_Brin hated this. Being this close to Lydecker- the man who could condemn her to get her newfound freedom of mind destroyed within an instant. She reported the results of the exercise and even on Zack's behavior. That Lydecker found the time to be in Psy Ops and be involved in training was almost too much._

_He had ordered her to wait outside as Alec came as ordered._

"_You may stand at ease soldier" Lydecker's eyes were bearing into him and Alec fought the urge to look away. "There was much that had to be restored in the wake of Director Renfro's abuse of her power. I've seen your record- and a C/O whose solitary black mark fades next to his record should not have been removed from Command. And X5 231 is mediocre by comparison- which is why upon her return she will be assigned to another unit. You will be reinstated as your unit's commanding officer"_

"_Thank you sir" _

_But he wasn't done. "I was personally surprised to find that a clone of the elites had managed to be so capable- 494… until the records were thoroughly checked… you may sit 494" Lydecker paused. "During one of your encounters with X5 452- she named you?"_

"_Permission to speak freely sir"_

"_Granted"_

"_It was more on an insult than a name- Alec was meant to be smart aleck and she alternates between that and Dick, sir"_

"_The director's sponsor in Command was responsible for overseeing some of the X5 unit assignments. He authorized a control with the elites without knowledge or consent by the overall Command. 493's mental deficiency is the result of the cloning procedure… you were designed an elite and put in a different unit in another base. The experiment, although it was not authorized does yield results. That the genetic design of the elites is not just the product of their environment…they are truly the best… the fittest" _

"_494, during your mission to monitor Berrisford- after you were given the order to eliminate them both, and the subject of your lapse in judgment was killed- you never tried to run- why?"_

"_My loyalty is to Manticore and the chain of Command, sir" Alec's face gave nothing away. "Any feelings were meaningless next to that" _

"Ben ran with us" Brin said, not unkindly. "He is our brother-you aren't"

Alec narrowed his eyes. "734, the only reason I got my command back was because it turns out I'm the original… that I'm one of-" Alec couldn't finish the sentence, the very notion that he was like them at all…it disgusted him.

"If you were like us- Lydecker would have sent you to Psy Ops… Alec you are a loyal soldier. I remember some of the programming. You choose to be X5 494 and completely loyal to him, what he wishes we were without Psy Ops… if that's what you want, go back to being that- and the next time you see us , we'll run and you'll try to bring us in"

Brin moved up the stairs to catch up with the others and paused, and looked down as Alec spoke.

"Please, don't tell anyone"

"I won't… but Alec you ever make the choice to be more than just a solider… that door never closes with us"

---

Max checked her timer, four minutes to go and the door with the passage to the roof was just ahead.

The elevator across the hall chimed open and Lydecker stepped out. She felt Logan tense up and Zack raise his gun. Lydecker looked taken aback for a moment by the sight of them. It didn't take long for Lydecker to regain his composure.

"X9 208 stand down"

Logan moved away from Max, backing against the wall and his eyes conveyed a silent begging. Max obliged. She punched him, knocking him out. "Zack get him to the roof, I'll deal with our favorite Colonel"

As Zack slung the unconscious man over his shoulders and moved forward, Max ran towards Lydecker dodging the shot he managed to get out. Max ripped the gun from his grip and jerked the clip out and threw both pieces against the wall, and the clip broke. Max backed Lydecker towards the wall by the throat and raised him up. "You know Deck, I always wondered why we never killed you back then… when we were scared kids… but I'm not scared anymore, not of you"

Lydecker couldn't get a word up as he held onto her raised arm to try to get a breath in. But the look- what Lydecker got off on her killing him, he wasn't even worried. Max felt her breath speed up. If she killed him here, it would cross a line that she promised herself a long time ago she'd never cross. Lydecker never got to win. She would never be one of them again.

Max released her grip and Lydecker fell to the ground, barely conscious. "I swear, I'll find another way to take you down"

"Max"

Max looked over to where Brin was coming up and she smiled and leaned down to whisper in Lydecker's ear. "That's right, Brin's back on our team, and that makes it 4-0… you're the zero Deck" she flicked him in the face and joined Brin into the passage.

The helicopter was lowering itself, as an alarm started to go off. The second it touched the ground, Zack ducked down low, carrying Logan's unconscious form as he got in. Max and Brin ran just as the bullets began to fly.

As they reached the helicopter's door, a bullet hit Brin in the leg and she bent down. Max held her sister around the middle and got her through. She closed the sliding door. They were secure.

"Okay Ryjenko get us the hell out of here!"

Max could still feel the adrenaline charge as Manticore grew smaller as they rose higher and they moved towards Seattle. She pulled out a first aid kit and got Brin to sit on the ground of the cabin. She quickly checked Zack's ears with a small flashlight. "You're clear- check Logan and then Brin"

She looked at Brin's leg, and ripped the pant leg. "It missed the vein- thank god we actually have bandaging or we'd have to cauterize this" Max put down padding on the wound and slowly wrapped the gauze around the leg.

"So Lydecker's dead"

Max said nothing, wincing and almost immediately Zack let out, not so much a string of curses, but a muffled scream of frustration.

Max ignored him, as she focused on Logan who was still out, and propped up in the seat. He was different, and Max wished she has known months ago- and gotten the chance before Logan began to lose himself. When he was still able to call her Max.

But there had never been a chance to save Logan from becoming like her. Not unless she could do something geeky like go back in time and not go after Manticore that day. That would be a great ability- to undo her mistakes. Especially the ones that hurt the people around her. Max sat next to him and kissed him on the forehead. "I love you" she whispered.

* * *

_**Harbor Lights Medical – Seattle, Washington**_

* * *

Max stared into the room, as she watched him sleep from the doorway. Dr Carr walked towards her and guided her to the hall outside. "I'm not going to know the full extent of the changes to his body until I get the test results back from Beverly Shankar… but if they weren't there the sleep deprivation on its own would have killed him- I've sedated him for now"

"What?"

Sam Carr shook his head. "Max- I didn't have a choice- sleep is the best way for his body to get over the very dangerous and illegal psychoactive class drugs in his body…he is going to have to take medication"

Max looked at him like he was crazy. "Take drugs to get over them- that sounds whack"

"Max- the whole point is for his body to get back to normal… or recover to whatever is normal for him now- he'll be asleep for a good ten hours"

"Four" He frowned, and Max shrugged. "If his metabolism is anything like ours it'll be four hours maximum… that's 'normal' for him now"

After he left, Max took a seat in the hallway staring at her hands exhausted. Maybe despite all the preparation she had done, with what she could find- she had never really believed that Logan would be like this. The Logan she knew would have told Lydecker 'no', simply and clearly. Not be compelled to carry out the order. The Logan Cale, protector of all that was good and true followed the direction of the Anti-Christ. And Max was struggling to reconcile Eyes Only with the broken down man she had rescued tonight.

"Max- we need to talk" Max looked up at Zack and was struck by the realization that this was who Logan could become.

They both were mission driven, for reasons other than themselves. Ask either- before all this to take a personal day- Zack and Logan would make every excuse starting with 'the others' and 'when the restless spirits need to be avenged'. But Logan had been 'gentler'… what if he became as closed off as Zack unable to ever admit to any type of emotion as anything but a moment of weakness. And that was the best case scenario…

She nodded and they went into a disused and empty ward. Funny how the Mayor's office could justify cutting the Seattle hospitals budgets for cocktail parties.

Zack checked the rooms for anyone squatting and then returned to her. "How long has he been calling me 452?"Max asked.

"Months now, it's some programmed command Lydecker got inside his head early on" Zack talked bluntly- not holding back. "I had to watch over him to keep him from losing himself, and make myself vulnerable"

Max's eyes flashed. "I'm sorry he was such an inconvenience for you Zack"

"Don't" Zack's voice was just above a whisper but it didn't take from his tone. "I am responsible for Logan now Max- you brought him into this… because you were reckless. Max the two times we have worked with Lydecker it was your call and both times now, he double crossed us"

"Would you rather have left Renfro in charge of Manticore…we had to do something" Max stared at the ground and then looked up at Zack. "If I could change this I would Zack- but I can't… I get that what happened to you and Logan is my fault… what do you want me to do?"

Zack just looked at her. "What I've asked you to do- leave Seattle. But I shouldn't even try, should I?" He closed the difference between them and raised her chin. "Tell me Max that it'll be different this time, tell me that you will leave"

"I can't" Max said, pushing his hand away from her, taking a step back. "Seattle is home, it's where Logan doesn't remember home being. It's how I'm getting him back…. Zack I am not going to let him become you" For a moment, Max swore Zack was going to attack her.

Instead Zack left her there, not even bumping her as he went past- deliberately stepping around Max.

Zack was furious. They weren't even free for a few hours and Max insisted on making the same moves again. He was tempted to make Logan leave, but he couldn't do that. Right now, Logan trusted him… unfortunately he also held the same trust although a different attachment to Max. He would have enough trouble getting his mind back together. The last thing Zack wanted to do was make the world more confusing and send Logan straight back to Manticore- or to something worse like Ben.

He knocked on Brin's door. "We're going"

"At least the bullet's out at least before you start taking me places…"Brin started getting dressed in the odd clothes she had been given. "Aren't we going to say good bye to Max first?"

"She's made her call- and I've made mine, that's an order Brin" He was going to get Brin settled- Atlanta- or somewhere near Chicago. Well out of Lydecker's way. Brin didn't fight him on it. And Zack was relying on Max not getting into anything in the next few weeks before he returned. He had been left with no choice but to look out for Logan. He had become his responsibility. So he was going to make sure that Logan ended up away from Seattle.

No matter what Max had to say on it.

* * *

_**To Be Continued…**_

* * *

Oh, my god. This was a long chapter and thank god it was the last one this long for a while- any chapters this long again are going to be this fic's concluding chapters.

So, let's move towards that end and hit that tiny little review button that makes the world go round.

Chapter Completed 1/1/2010 and it works both ways!


	10. The Mark Of Cain

Disclaimer: Do not own Dark Angel, James Cameron, Charles Eglee and FOX do. And so on.

Now, the revised summary for this fanfiction is here on account of it means new readers don't get spoiled – with what happens- such as Logan getting out of Manticore. By the way thanks for the reviews and I've added a new poll on my profile...which may have relevance for this fic.

Chapter 10 onwards/Summary: AU, AJBAC. After the failed attempt on Manticore's DNA lab, Max made it out and Logan didn't. Captured by Manticore, Logan was turned into a soldier, and Max became Eyes Only. When Max rescues Logan, it's up to her to put the fractured pieces of Logan Cale back together again. But Lydecker is lurking in the wings, prepared to do anything to bring them both back to Manticore.

Can a broken angel save a damaged hero?

* * *

**Chapter Ten**

**The Mark of Cain**

* * *

_**Harbor Lights Medical, Seattle**_

**_

* * *

_**

Opening the file, Max flipped though the document that Matt Sung had just handed her. "Eyes Only shows this, and Pierpont has to change his new plans, and he'll slip up for once and we might just see where he runs his show" They were sitting in the old broken down family room- which had been in such disuse there was dust and grime everywhere. Her beeper started to go off and she ignored it.

"Don't you need to see who it is?"

Max shook her head. "It's Original Cindy- but I don't have time to see her today… I told her it went down fine so she knows I'm not trapped in Manticore or anything, besides I'm taking Logan home" Actually in the last hour- she could have slipped out to give her friend the full lowdown on what had went down last night. But something just kept making her put it off- telling Cindy just didn't seem to feel all good. And she had no idea why.

The former detective looked at her. "I wouldn't have thought he would be ready to be released"

"Yeah, but you know Logan" Max faked a smile. "Since when does he ever take things easy" She wished it was just that. Truth was it had nothing to do with that- in here Logan felt trapped and who could blame him? The entire place was one big antiseptic, doctor and sharp needle filled bad flashback for anyone who had spent time in Manticore and in particular Psy Ops.

As Max stepped out in the hall as Matt Sung asked her to give his best to Logan, she started to brood. Over Zack. It was all well to be mad at her- but cut short a reunion with Brin? They had just gotten spoken a little on the way back from Manticore and nothing that deep. And all he left was a short message on the answering machine in Logan's apartment saying that they hadn't been kidnapped by Manticore. And that made her feel just all better. Not.

But it might have been 'better' not to say the part about Logan turning out like Zack. Even if she had meant it. But Zack would have hightailed it anyway- he just might have thrown in a grunted goodbye first.

She was snapped out of her metal musings as she stepped into the room. Logan had gotten changed into the clothes that she had brought in and was staring out the window. In the wheelchair. It was hospital policy and she'd explained it- but Max had expected him to fight her on this one.

He was… had been sensitive about it, and more than a few of their fights had been because of it. Logan just couldn't see himself as whole with the chair and it had taken so long for him to be a little okay with it. But Logan wasn't complete now even if he could walk… and for a second Max wished he still actually needed it. Because in a twisted, freak show way- the wheelchair seemed like it should still be part of him.

Logan turned the wheelchair around. "You convinced them I should go?" He unconsciously looked down and moved his foot.

Max hid the worry from her face and she went behind Logan to steer the chair. On some level being in that chair bothered him- and that was a good sign. "Doc's not happy but I get how you feel… who wants to be cooped up in a place like this anyway"

"Thanks 4-" Logan cut it short- but Max felt the smile die on her face and was grateful that he couldn't see it.

Her grip tightened on the handles and she kept moving forward. "It's okay… it's not your fault"

"I'm trying, I am… it's just out of reach" Logan's frustration was clear as day, unlike his mind.

"I know Logan, we're good" As they left the hospital, they stopped to hand the wheelchair over to the nurse who had appeared. What were they going to do with a wheelchair- sell it for parts?

Logan hesitated getting up for a moment, and Max helped him stand up. She knew physically- that he didn't need the help. But inside- mentally he may as well have been stuck in that chair. "You are still Logan… and that's something in itself. It will come back to you" His hand was still in hers and Max found that she was looking straight into his eyes.

They broke apart as a familiar sight hovered past, and Max watched as Logan looked away so there was no possible way the drone could scan his face. But she could see how pale he went. Max didn't have to imagine- she knew exactly how scared Logan would be… he was still tempering his words thinking that this could all still be in his head. He'd learn that it wasn't- but the fear? The fear and always looking over your shoulder- it never went away.

* * *

_**Manticore**_

* * *

"It's a hell of a thing Lydecker" Liam Rensfield, just shook his head as the footage repeated itself on the small briefing room's projector. "Worse hire we ever made, and it's still biting us in the ass" he waved a hand. " You told us Elizabeth didn't sit right- well from now on I think everyone on the Committee are going to listen the next time someone doesn't sit right with you Deck" Lydecker didn't say 'I told you so'- it just was not in his nature.

Rensfield used the small pointer to freeze frame on Max edging down the hall. "Who do you think gave X5 452 the information?"

Lydecker gave a cold, humorless smile. "McGinnis- has a score to settle with Manticore and he certainly was in bed with Renfro…with all he knows it has been difficult to track him down and if he is 452's source then he's now been hidden with the connections of Eyes Only"

"How far along was X9 208's indoctrination" Rensfield asked, straight to the point.

"Enough that without the intervention of the others- he'd have stood down… but we know where he's gone"

Rensfield chuckled. "This one has a thing for staying put- at least even playing Eyes Only she knows better than to expose anybody… the last thing we need is Manticore on the six o'clock news"

Lydecker inclined his head. "452 knows that we would just relocate- the news crews would roll up and find nothing more than a VA hospital- Eyes Only would lose credibility"

"Get whatever resources you need" Rensfield stood up and Lydecker did the same. "Whatever it takes to make sure that there are no more weaknesses in the system… and the same goes for your kids, whatever you need" After he left, Lydecker turned to the frozen picture of Max.

Renfro had tried to use Ben to justify eliminating the rogue unit. But with her death and the knowledge that it was a defect of the cloning process- the order had quickly been rescinded. None of the others were serial killers or drawing attention to themselves apart from Max- and that was as Eyes Only.

Lydecker could still feel the bruises on his neck. She was still too weak, too willing to compromise for what she believed would attach her to this place. He'd give her a few weeks- after all it was Logan Cale himself that would make her lose heart. When she realized she couldn't undo what had been done- that was the tactically correct time to strike at her.

* * *

_**Seattle**_

* * *

Logan had forgotten what it was like to sleep in his own bed. Not one that could be lowered down with a chain- or one in the infirmary or Psy Ops. This was different- the sheets were already unmade when he lay down and the pillows- god he'd forgotten how soft it was. And that he was safe. There were no guards… Logan swallowed as he remembered with a sickening rush the guard he had killed. It hadn't been 'kill or be killed'- the man had died because he had lashed out. Not even thinking- Logan had taken someone else's life without a qualm, no moral compass.

He turned over and tried to close his eyes again. It was just too hard- every time he drifted off- he would be back marching down those halls, in Psy Ops and hearing his own voice, over and over again. _"I'll fight you"_

Not that it had made difference.

"Do not attempt to adjust your set; this is a Streaming Freedom Video Bulletin. The cable hack will last exactly sixty seconds"

Logan frowned, and got up following the voice. As he entered the main living area he could see through the frosted partition the glow of the computers. He knew the line and it ran through his mind as he could hear 452- and his own voice- digitized say it "It cannot be traced, it cannot be stopped, and it is the only free voice left in this city"

It was a strange but a familiar feeling to hear the cable hack being done by 452. But what surprised him was how…sincere she sounded doing it. Logan found a smile creeping across his face and he didn't know why he found 452 doing this hack so good that, why it mattered she wanted to help others. That she cared.

"…Pierpont Lempkin has been running arms unchecked. What you are about to see is a disturbing truth- that in the last few weeks Lempkin has been using the rail system to transport these weapons all the while with innocent people including children have been in the next carriage. That the sector police look the other way while the people of Seattle's lives are being put at risk. It's time they did their job and protected Seattle and not the criminals. This has been a streaming freedom video bulletin via the Eyes Only informant net- peace out"

She turned around as she ended the hack, and got up. "Déjà vu"

"How do you figure?"

Max shrugged. "Remember – how we first met… I broke in here, and you were doing your thing"

"Right" Logan said, although all he could remember were vague flashes- holding a gun and her breaking through a window. 452 seemed to realize that he didn't quite remember and he could see her amused expression fade and he hated it. He, somehow… didn't want her to think less of him. He touched the keyboard. "Colonel Lydecker, asked me about Eyes Only all the time"

Max looked at the open video file, displaying the Eyes Only image, for anything to look at- that wouldn't be her meeting his eyes. "Doesn't surprise me" She knew he had- Lydecker had sent her an entire Psy Ops session one time. And Max was suddenly glad she had all those discs locked up. Who knew what kind of psychological damage seeing those would do to Logan. "Gotta say you did a great job at setting this all up – I mean it really doesn't give me much to do apart from hitting buttons"

"I built most of it" Logan said, sitting down in the chair that she had vacated and started to go through the files. "I had to build one in Manticore… we needed to get into the system… there was a room in the subbasement with old parts from computers" Even without the glasses it was a good sight.

"Well you are good at it" Max said, looking over at him. Of course Lydecker would keep that part of Logan intact. It was an asset- something he could use- and eventually against the very thing he created to protect people.

Logan had just opened the file on the veteran extortion hack. "I was glad when we found it. Zack had been helping me a lot- and it felt good to be useful… to be able to do something towards fighting them"

Max leaned on the desk. "Wow- I'm actually impressed" Her joking tone was covering her relief at his words. She caught sight of him closing his eyes for a long second and then forcing them back open. Like the last thing he wanted to do was fall asleep "Let me guess- the moment you close your eyes, you're back there"

Logan looked down. "I just can't seem to get it out of my mind… and then it feels like I can't get away from it" And it threatened to send him over the edge into nothing- because it felt like his mind was still in there.

"Like the darkness, Manticore's there right behind your eyes" She held his hand and squeezed it gently. "I know, come on" Getting Logan back into the bedroom, was the easy part. But even lying down she could see him trying to stay awake. Max got onto the bed, not under the sheets but on top of them sitting next to Logan. "So what was Captain Dick… 494 to you in Manticore?"

Staring at the ceiling for a moment, Logan felt for a second as if he should stay silent. Like telling 452 anything about Alec would be a betrayal. He fought it down. "He was the CO of the unit I was temporarily assigned to- I couldn't trust him" No, it wasn't a betrayal as long as he didn't say anything about… Rachel. He knew the name; it was just now as he finally slowed down- he felt more tired. And frustrated- why could he remember and hear names- but not 452's- never hers?

"What's my last name?"

"Cale- you are Logan Cale, your birthday is November 11th – and you are thirty one years old" Max swallowed. Now that had been a bad day- for one Lydecker had sent a commemorative present. And she had been here, alone with no light sitting in the dark. And some point in that night- she had the sinking feeling she would never save him. But she had. Max realized she had been in her head and she looked at Logan who had drifted off.

Max laid down on her back and leaned in close. "And my name is Max" she whispered into his ear softly. "It's Max"

And maybe somewhere deep down, Logan would hear her.

* * *

The morning came as it always did- only this time Max had spent most of the night watching Logan sleep. It was strange to see someone else tossing and turning over nightmares. She had never lived with her brothers and sisters after the escape and she wondered if they were just like this. Like the past never really went away- and when you slept you couldn't ignore it. It was just there.

She was lifting up her cup of fake coffee as she heard the water turn on.

As the water came on Logan had to tell himself that the water wasn't going to cut off in thirty seconds- and he could take his time. In Manticore- the shower's spray hit hard and was never hot- just lukewarm. This was different, and Logan's smile widened- like a kid on Christmas morning. Just standing under the water was a luxury he hadn't had in a long time, and the water ran cold before he could get tired of it.

Tuning the shower off, Logan unconsciously picked up the bathrobe and put it on. It fit- he still belonged here. He looked forward and saw his own face looking back. He put a hand to the side of his face- feeling the shadow of stubble.

He had to take it off- facial hair wasn't regulation. Logan knew he was giving into the soldier but he had to on something. The Colonel's voice was still in his head- telling him to pick up the phone and turn himself in. A small compromise to keep sane.

He frowned when he couldn't find any sort of razor. The panic deepened and Logan felt something like desperation as he searched frantically for anything that would work. He finally went into the small metal bin that was on the ground and picked out an old razor.

Max could hear Logan coming out, and she turned and found the morning greeting frozen in her mouth. "Oh no" She had taken the shaving razors out of the bathroom, to stop him from shaving so that the beard that he had before all of this would grow back. Something that seemed to be him, it suited him. That had been a mistake.

Logan was dressed, a little more formally than he had usually worn around before. But it was the cuts on his face that made her wince. "What happened?"

"I couldn't find anything to shave with so I went with a blunt razor" Even as Logan heard his explanation to 452, he hated it. It didn't seem so important now- like it had been a little thing and it had become a big deal because he let it.

She sighed. "It's on me- I shouldn't have taken them out-" Max turned and went into the fridge and forced a cheerful expression onto her face. "Thanks to Mrs. Moreno we have some great breakfast choices, I swear that old lady likes you or something" she teased. "And you know I can only boil the water when it comes to most things"

Logan smiled gratefully. It didn't have to be such a big deal. "Anything I can do to help?"

"Just get two sets of cutlery out" Max watched him turn and bend down to get the drawer. He remembered which one it was… everything was so low in here- on account of the wheelchair. But still – he remembered where things were. She needed to take the good signs and deal with the bad… Max froze as she caught sight of something past his collar.

"Logan, stand still okay"

She walked over and tugged the back of his collar down. Max's breath caught. "Go sit down, now… do you feel hot at all?"

"No… 452, what's going on?"

Max picked up the phone and dialed. And with every number dialed- she could see the faint outline of the barcode on the back of Logan's neck. She could already read the numbers. It was not a skin tone, like Case's had been with the nanites but who knew how far Lydecker had gone with that technology. She could hear the phone pick up. Thank god.

* * *

She opened the door before Sam could knock a second time. "Thanks for making a house call"

"It's no problem Max" Sam Carr said, holding a small folder. "I meant to call you anyway- we got some of the tests back on Logan- relax there are no nanites in his blood or anything else like that"

Max frowned. "Then what's with the barcode… I mean if I didn't know better I'd say it was coming back- like when I get mine taken off…"

Sam opened the folder to a page and passed it over to Max. "I hate to say it- but my guess is that is exactly what this is. I'm no geneticist so I'm not going to pretend to understand to know everything about this- but it looks-"

"Like someone just cut, added and changed a whole bunch of genes- pretty flawlessly as well" Like Max needed a piece of paper to tell her what had been done. But it was in black and white making it hard to hide from. Just like the barcode. "Why wasn't the barcode already visible- I mean if it was just taking him out of Manticore- it should have taken longer for it to show up"

Sam shrugged. "There was enough drugs in his system that it will take a long time to figure out which one did what- but there is one that we don't have on our records- it seemed to be breaking down and was definitely on the way out- it had some properties in common with drugs used in gene therapy"

She could not stop moving around, pacing. Max looked to Logan- and knew with regret that he could hear every word. "So Lydecker had the scientists suppressing this particular change to his DNA- and was letting the drug wear off"

Max could still see how messed up Logan was in that cell- he had not believed in his own mind. Broken… and then Max imagined what it would be like for that barcode to show up inside of Manticore. It would have crushed him. It still might. "Sick bastard" Max muttered.

The doctor patted her on the shoulder and she heard him say good bye to Logan. She walked over to where Logan was staring out the window.

"There wasn't one doctor in Manticore- that was compassionate" Logan said quietly, looking at her. "The ones in Psy Ops- and the ones who experiemented- they took pride in what they did… the doctors in the infirmary looked the other way all the time- patched soldiers up and sent them on their way" He gave a weary, broken smile. "Thing is I know that Dr Carr is different but I can't separate them in my mind"

Max stared down to the top of the walkway she had ran across on the night they had met. And all she could think of was the mess she had made of his life "I know you heard everything"

"It doesn't really change anything- I am what I am now, I'm going to have to deal with it not dwell on how it happened- everything turns out the way it's supposed to, right?"

"The universe being right on schedule- do you remember who taught you that?"

And that look on his face as he struggled to remember- told Max everything. He was okay with it- because they had destroyed his past. Because he couldn't remember the mother who taught him that lesson- a person who had proved he had a life apart from Manticore. Manticore wouldn't let him hold onto the memory of the mother he lost when he was thirteen- mothers were not even a factor to them.

Her pager went off again and Max glanced at the number, then at Logan. And she knew why she hadn't called Original Cindy back.

* * *

Jam Pony. It had been a long time since Max had been here, and she felt it. In a way she missed the stupid job she had picked up to scout places to break into. Where she had met her friends, and had that delivery that had led her to Logan. And standing in the middle of this place- Max knew she didn't belong here anymore. And it completely sucked.

"What are you doing here Missy Miss- your name is mud" Normal, came out from his counter, holding that clipboard in his usual attempt to fake importance. "You don't have a job here anymore"

Max scoffed. "Like I care –where's Original Cindy?" she asked coolly.

Normal didn't seem to take the hint she had a short fuse. "You leave no notice, and now you're persona non grata- which means I want you off the premises"

"No notice" Max laughed. It was more angry than an actual, happy laugh and it made Normal take a step back. "The reason I left no notice is until a few weeks ago, a group of whack terrorists were holding Logan prisoner and brainwashing him in some place in the back of the woods and now he doesn't even know himself. So, sorry Normal for not giving you notice to quit this dump… tell OC I'll be waiting for her in Crash" She turned around and walked out leaving Normal standing there, spluttering and ashamed. And the worst part was- that apart from changing a few words it was all true.

"Heard you laid a verbal smackdown on Normal" Original Cindy sat next to Max at the small table she had picked. "Check this- he says 'sorry' and a bunch of crap- and he don't know the half of it- so what's up Boo"

Max felt her eyes sting and she wondered when she had become soft. "I told you we made it out, and all I think of before this was saving Logan and Zack and kicking it with you afterwards- that it'd be over and things could get back to normal" she rested a finger on her untouched glass of beer. "But I kept putting it off this last day… and it wasn't until a few hours ago I realized the reason why, was because we can't do this anymore"

Original Cindy frowned, "Say what now?"

"Be friends… or in each other's lives- you have no idea how much it's meant to have a friend who knew what I was and still wanted to kick it with me" Max bit her lip, "… but I was fooling myself. And I am not going to let you get caught in the crossfire"

"Is this about Logan?"

"No this is about you- it's too late for him, but it's not for you and I'm not about to let you take that hit for me… he is going to spend the rest of his life running from people who want to throw him in a cage for the rest of his life, turn him into a science experiment, or even just kill him… if you stay around me, something just as bad will happen to you- or worse"

She stood up, and forced herself not to look at her friend's face. "Good bye Original Cindy"

"Max- hold up for a second…"

But she couldn't. Max had to get out of there, right at that moment. She had to be strong about this decision and it was a choice that was tearing her up. But she couldn't make the same mistake twice. Not when she could do it right for Original Cindy.

She had to let her go- so she walked away.

Original Cindy ran out just in time to see Max fly past on her motorcycle and drive away, her hair flying behind her.

_I never thought I'd be the one leaving someone else… but then I never counted on everything that happened in these last months. And a part of me just wants to stay true to what I've always believed- that staying together is the best thing. But how can I do that when Original Cindy' being safe depends on us being apart?_

_I know that now. I have to keep my distance from others. Maybe if I'd realized it back then I could have saved Logan from everything. Who knows?_

_I guess we'll see where this road takes us… _

* * *

Logan sat at the computers- looking through the various files. He knew he could ask 452 about it, but he felt as if this was something he had to find for himself. He clicked through the photos until he found the right one.

Bling. So that had been the name of the man he had remembered in Manticore the day Alec had been describing 452's 'necro fetish' He stared at the wheelchair that sat in the corner. Manticore had given him back his legs back- his life and it was Manticore's cold logic that ran through his head, telling him why he should be loyal to them over 452.

But Logan knew a part of him that thought different. That Bling had died trying to help 452, to get him out of there. And that the only way he could deal with learning the full meaning of this death- letting it hurt the way it should was to fight Manticore and the soldier inside of him.

That part of him, X9 208 was strong and Logan wondered if he could really defeat it. But outside, the only place he'd find Psy Ops was his own nightmares.

It started to rain outside and Logan wondered if 452 knew how long it took- to stop missing the people left behind in Manticore. Because he missed the X5s he had trained with and even if they were supposed to be the enemy. It felt like he had left a part of himself behind in Manticore.

He reached up and touched the back of his neck. The barcode was just a physical sign of the chains to Manticore and it didn't matter. But Logan wished it mattered. That he could feel upset over it. That he could just feel anything about it other than resignation.

It was another rainy day in Seattle.

* * *

_**To Be Continued…**_

* * *

Gahh- I can't help it… it's another long one. And don't worry Original Cindy isn't getting written out-… you'll just have to see what happens next.

Okay, please review because it keeps the chapters coming.

Chapter Completed : 11/01/10 or 01/11/10


	11. Being Alone and Together

Disclaimer: Hmm… don't own Dark Angel- unfortunately 'cause otherwise I never would have left it- so that FOX can block another network continuing it. A girl can dream though. Okay let's get to the chapter part aiight?

As always thanks to those who reviewed- you guys are what keep me in going in this dark, grim world where DA was cancelled after S2 and people that think that it's okay to step on the little guy. It's too bad we don't have an Eyes Only.

On a side note- I gave Chrisette a more realistic real type name making Chrisette - while trying to keep in tune with the less than a minute glance we got of this character and give her back story. Only OC will ever refer to her by this real name- all the other characters will call her Chrisette.

* * *

**Chapter Eleven**

**Being Alone and Together**

* * *

**_Seattle_**

* * *

452 had thought he was still asleep. Logan listened as the door shut quietly and got up slowly. Logan knew she had been talking with someone last night about something to do with Eyes Only –some stakeout. She had probably left to get the results of that or something. Sleep for Logan, was proving hard to come by. Every little noise- footstep, a hoverdrone passing by outside and it woke Logan up… fearing that Colonel Lydecker had come to drag him back to Manticore.

Not that his nightmares had made him feel any better. Not any more better than being able to hear every other name but hers. So Logan tried, not to call her anything. But '452' just slipped out like it should be her name. And Logan never wanted to hurt her in the way he saw it did every time. Even if she tried to hide it from him, he could still see her flinch.

Logan padded across the floor and to the computer setup. 452 had been talking about Steelheads. Steelheads were obsessed with metal, technology and enhanced themselves- and more often than not it always ended fatally or it seriously messed them up. They were idiots in that sense- they couldn't see how just being normal was something special in itself. To add to the problem- they often were involved in crime to support their metal addiction.

He stared at the ear piece and slipped it in. Logan listened for any sign of 452 returning. None. He set up the record, to save the video- instead of direct transmission. She could do it- so could he, Logan believed that. He had to.

"Do not attempt to adjust your sets…"

_Images burning into his mind. It felt as if Colonel Lydecker was circling him, even though he hadn't moved. The Colonel leaned in close with a picture. "Eyes Only- how do we break into the system?"_

Logan gritted his teeth. "This is a streaming … freedom…" _The water was rising, and Logan felt his heart in his throat- as he tried to pull off the metal cuff that kept him attached to the ground. No air left- and Logan felt his entire body panic and a slow burning in his lungs as he remembered his last shallow breath. He could see the Colonel above him…_

"… bulletin video. It cannot be traced, it cannot be stopped"

"_Stand up" Logan muttered to himself. As the X6 was dragged away and he resumed moving his utensil all Logan could feel was the shame. That X6 was going to Psy Ops. That kid could have been spared if he had just stood up and did the right thing. He was supposed to. There wasn't a wheelchair stopping him anymore. It was fear. He had been too scared to stand up._

"-and it is… the only free-" Logan stopped, and he reached a hand up as he felt something move down his face. Tears. He had tried to tell himself that it was just a surprise so that when 452 saw it she would know he was okay. He wasn't, after everything Logan had just wanted to be able to prove to himself that he was still him. Logan hated how he felt inside. The soldier cursed at him for the emotion and the other Logan was screaming inside his mind.

He was supposed to be Eyes Only- the free voice in the city. But Logan knew that he wasn't really free. He was terrified to stand up now. And a part of him knew he should stand up to fight against everything that was wrong in the post Pulse broken world. But he couldn't because he was frozen in place- and struggling just to feel at the same time. He couldn't because he was not really Eyes Only anymore. And he knew that if 452 saw this she would worry a lot more.

Logan stopped the recording and deleted it.

* * *

"Just nice" Max said, holding up the bottle gingerly, the motion jarring the yellow liquid. "I really don't want to know" Matt Sung took it amused and Max just rolled her eyes. If only stakeouts were like they were on the few reruns still on the air. Not the whole- going in a bottle in the car. "Sorry- so have our idiots being doing anything or just tweaking each other?"

"Just a whole lot of posturing- selling drugs… bit stuff I'd love to get them on but not what we are after"

Max looked at the time quickly, and then back at the Steelheads. "We do that- we skip out on the part where they are stealing organs to sell on the black market… as if that wasn't enough of a bad childhood flashback"

Matt held out the binoculars and she shook her head. "Right- eagle eyes… you know I could talk to Logan- we used to spend time together on cases… maybe it would help"

The X5 smiled. "Thanks…" Max turned her attention back on the scene. Eyes Only kept her distracted from the pages, phone calls and the turning up in the last week that Original Cindy had tried. But ace she was at escape and evade, Max could usually dodge anybody. Only it was harder this time. But she couldn't compromise on this one- "Oh no"

Matt looked at the scene from his binoculars. "I think this could get them away from the truck- give us a chance…they wouldn't risk a scene near their clientele of body builders after steroids by hurting the bike messenger… he probably looked at them wrong"

She shook her head, a foot out the door. "No way- that is Sketchy, and he has a talent for getting his ass in the line of fire"

Max could already see the idiot held up by his shirt and something was dangling in the tall, beefy black muscled guy with the spikes hand. A drug… and from all the yelling it sounded as if dear old Calvin had been carrying something he shouldn't have on Steelhead turf.

"How about I just give this to you and we call it square … okay man?"

The blonde Steelhead shook his head, leaning forward. "No mate, it's too far for that… but if you beg a little more- we might just make this a lesson"

Here was her cue. "How about you let him go- believe me he never learns" Max fixed Sketchy with a glare. How many times did she have to save him from himself?

The emo looking, blue haired moron with the mechanical hand holding Sketchy up just sniggered. "We could… hey Eddy, maybe we can take her back- I bet she'd be fun"

"Bird -keep your sodding mouth shut- well luv…" Eddy looked at her. Even his accent was irritating and Max felt her skin crawl as he looked her over- with disgust in his eyes as well. He probably slept with a toaster and she had to get her mind off that track. "Looks like we 'ave a problem…see now we need to teach you a lesson now too"

Max smirked. "And that's my line…" She kicked Bird back forcing him to drop Sketchy. "Get back to the street I'll be right there" One thing to be said about Sketchy was that he was the master of the 'skedaddle' to save his own hide. Too bad he kept putting himself there.

She pushed out a hand to keep the spiked, towering Steelhead from following him. "Nice blades" Max quipped sarcastically after she took a good look at the side of his arm.

"Usually I hesitate, I have a problem hitting little ladies but I'm making an exception because your mouth ain't so little"

"Make it a good showing Tuck, eh?" These Steelheads had picked the wrong day to get on her bad side. Firstly they were no steel containers around- so there was no way she could bust them today for the human organs. Secondly, the whole situation with Original Cindy and then Manticore- well all that could leave a girl with a serious craving to give out a world of hurt.

As the bladed armed Tuck came at her she twisted his arm, hearing metal and bone crunch and she punched him hard in the temple. And he was out. "Damn, would of hit a less painful spot… but he had all those spikes- I don't suppose you guys just want to lie down and skip the getting your asses kicked"

"You bi-" She backhanded Eddy before the last word could come out of his mouth.

"I was hoping you'd say something like that" Max slammed her elbow backwards knocking out Bird and then roundhouse kicked Eddy into the truck. "Night" And the last thing he saw was her fist.

Max just shook her head at the three unconscious Steelheads and kneeled down. That hadn't even been a work out- where was Captain Dick when she needed a punching bag? She looked through their pockets, taking a few hundred bucks from them. Then she found the steroid- 'andy'. Nice to know that there were idiots out there that liked paying to take the drugs that made their hearts explode.

Max took the arm of the unconscious Tuck, and used it to open the little bags of steroids and let the dust float into the wind. She brushed her hands off and turned towards where Sketchy was. Sketchy had been cowering the whole time and only now had popped his head up to see if everything was okay.

Sketchy laughed with relief. "Thanks Max, I thought I was a goner"

"Do you have a death wish?" Max gestured towards where the Steelheads were laying. "I mean how many more times do you need to be beat up for deliveries to say no to Russian ganagstas… or whoever you were playing messenger boy for this time"

"It was just a Jam Pony client – he didn't tell me-"

Max groaned. "You didn't even ask, did you 'Calvin', the next time they offer a hundred bucks to experiment on your brain, forget the money and keep the brain cells- you don't have many left"

Sketchy just hung his head and kept looking at her edgeways. "What?" she finally asked as Matt left the car to come greet them. It was funny- Matt Sung was no longer a cop but Sketchy's darty eyes got worse.

"Can you come with me back to Jam Pony- they might have friends willing to jump me… I said some things… come on Max" Sketchy pleaded as he saw her hesitate. "I know you and her Originalness are on the outs- but she has the day off… please"

"Don't worry about Logan," Matt offered. "I'll go back to the apartment and watch him- besides chances are we'll get more from the tap than watching them all day"

Max didn't want to- this excursion had already taken enough time that Logan would have woken up alone. But then he had known Matt longer than her- even if his memories of him were less now. Maybe Matt Sung could get something that she couldn't. And Sketchy was just too pathetic to say no to.

"Come on" Max motioned to Sketchy and slipped on her bicycle. At least she hadn't used her motorcycle so she didn't have to walk that all the way to Jam Pony- but then it didn't feel the same way during the day. Or at least she was trying not to make it as traceable back to her. Max wanted to delay the day she'd have to stop riding her bike places as long as she could.

* * *

Placing the dish in the old dish rack, Original Cindy took her hands out of the water, and crossed her arms. "Maybe Original Cindy's just gotta take this hit for the while, on account of her being all strung out over what happened to her boy" Cindy had learnt how to use code phrases and lies for Max related issues all over like foundation on a drag queen. She knew how to not feel all guilt teen angst over it – even to Chrisette… or Sarah as she liked being called in private. It made it better to know she was the only person who knew her lickety-boo's real name.

Sarah put down the clothes she had been folding with a loud bang- no so much a statement but then she was without restraint when it came to speaking her mind. Right when this started Sketchy had the nerve to sniff after her new shortie- only Sarah could hold her own.

"You know that's a lie right there" Sarah spoke bluntly. "Truth is I'm betting Max has never cut you out of anything before – word?"

"Word"

"And now- her boy gets kidnapped by a bunch of red necked losers from the back of the woods and all of a sudden something about her past gets tripped up"

Original Cindy frowned. "You seem intelligible"

"I told you I'm old school witness protection- when the Pulse hit I was at my cousin's place- next thing I know everyone panics. We were playing hide and seek and I was under a bed as some psycho comes in and kills my cousin, aunt and uncle- lost my parents not long after that- and I got hidden in the system… never found the guys who did it. So now every time something trips it up I do anything to get from being close to people"

"Like being celibate" Cindy finished. The opening up was slow with her lickety boo but then it was kind of the way things were meant to go. Slow. Not all fast and burned out like with Diamond, because that way it just ended with everyone torn up and all. All rain and no sunshine.

"Right" Sarah said. "And there are days when it's easier to push people away because someone hurt me- or someone close to me got hurt- but you've gotta ride it out- like I pushed you away but you came back at me that night- even when I told you to go do something violent to yourself"

Original Cindy offered a brief hand to Sarah's. For a bisexual- Sarah wasn't big on the whole touchy feely part of the relationship. It was more the just being there deal, straight up.

"What if you are afraid you'll get somebody hurt?"

Sarah shrugged. "It's always something- someone who knew Sarah Walker versus Chrisette Jensen who wants to use it against me… but then if you let that part of it bite your ass- just don't let Max shut you out… I mean it's not like it's for 'real now dangerous' it's just a past thing- right?"

"Right" Only it was all about the black helicopter guys. And how they were always a threat- a for 'real now' dangerous type threat. Cindy didn't want to be no liability but she knew Max. The difference here was that Sarah had come to terms with her past and it was all done. With Max it was always times a hundred with the complications. Unlike Chrisette who could live without her past and deal- Max needed her past as much as she needed to keep breathing. And she needed people to keep her real- to keep her from losing that centre.

Sarah moved to get changed. "Let's change your mood- and then we can get down to the skate park, and I can win more off the Pony guys… they always underestimate the female body and they hear the name Chrisette they hear delicate flower that needs picking- and you know I love showing them otherwise"

No, Cindy knew Max was counting on alienating her to push her away. And then to hole up… and all the while her 'sister' because that's what Max was to her, kept moving backwards instead of forwards. So Original Cindy wasn't going to let herself go down for the count.

* * *

Logan was looking through an old photo album he had found tucked away. And despite being in many of the pictures- he couldn't tell who the people he was with for the most part. There was one- with him and another man in formal attire and Logan could almost hear the name.

At least all the pictures had names on the back. Most of these people- apart from 452 and the man 'Bennett' Logan felt no attachment to any of them. Although there was something about an old couple- 'Jonas and Margo Cale' that made his skin crawl- especially the locket around the woman's neck.

He was disturbed from his thoughts by the sound of the elevator and Logan carefully slid the album out of sight and moved towards the door slowly. Logan had tried to find it earlier, the gun that he knew… from some part of his mind had been in the apartment. But unlike the people from the photo album- Logan felt like he remembered so much about 452. It was just instinctual- and that feeling told him that she hated guns and didn't use them. It was a rule. The door moved as someone inserted a key and Logan could see through the peephole that it was the former detective.

He wasn't just relieved. Logan felt an affinity with Matt Sung. He couldn't remember a past- more like feelings- images that flashed before his mind could see them. But they made him feel like he could still be Logan.

If Matt was surprised to see Logan near the door, he didn't show it much. "Hey Logan, Max will be back in the hour- she just had to help a friend get back to work safely- so I came back here early" They walked into the kitchen and Matt was surprised at what he saw in there. Logan had cooked something- and he knew it had to be Logan. Max didn't do anything in the kitchen very often that required much effort. It was something Logan had learned to do- for himself rather than just be the man of privilege he was supposed to be and have other people do things for him. Logan was very self sufficient in nature- without any twisted military training.

"To make sure I'm okay" Logan sat on a stool and looked across to Matt. "To be honest, I don't know if I'll ever be okay… I'm certainly not Eyes Only anymore"

"What makes you think that Logan?" Matt asked taking a stool and sitting next to his old friend. He knew that Logan had lost a lot- enough that they had needed to be reintroduced. Enough that Logan's words might just be true.

Logan had a glass of water in front of him, and he drank it after a moment. "I tried to record something for the report on the Steelheads… I thought that even after everything it would still be there- that I could still stand up for what I believed in…. all I could see was my own fear instead- what could happen if Manticore recaptures me and I'm paralyzed"

"And?"

Logan's brow knitted.

Matt just couldn't stop staring at Logan now. "Logan- you started Eyes Only four years ago- before that you published articles in the open that could get you killed- all the while finishing up college. It wasn't until three years ago that I stopped turning a blind eye to the corruption I saw. You have been sacrificing yourself, for this for freedom and justice ever since the Pulse. It was too much to ask of anybody but you took that on time and time again- no one would think less of you this time if you stopped and lived for once… if you got a life."

The younger man frowned, and then Logan spoke, almost as if he remembered it. "I would- if I gave up, I would think less of myself… I have to be able to do this Matt"

Matt Sung gave a pointed nod. "And that's why you are you- Logan… I think these people… Manticore took a lot from you; they stripped you down until they could confuse the hell out of you and make you question yourself like this. But you are still Logan Cale- no matter if they broke you- even if you had come back as nothing but a soldier"

"You seem very sure of this"

"Logan only you- would be this hard on yourself over something you think you failed at" Matt sighed. "In that respect… your worst enemy is always going to be you"

* * *

_**To Be Continued…**_

* * *

And thank hell that filler was out of the way. But it does move the story along and lets me get to chapter twelve which will be a fun one.

Okay, now please review and keep me from over thinking the end of this fic- which is starting to get rather long, the chapter I'm up to writing- I still haven't decided the way it will turn out at the end. And I can come up with some pretty dark endings in my head. That and raw chapters being done aside, editing is a pain.

Chapter Completed 29/01/10 or 01/29/10.


	12. Missing the Signs

Disclaimer: Do not own Dark Angel- so please, I have no illusions. No matter how much I have thought about how DA could be real.

So we get back to something more plot like this chapter, and yes I am trying to mirror what could have been in season 2. In 'She Ain't Heavy' we got this glimpse of something I think should have been expanded on- Max's fear of getting Original Cindy hurt or worse on account of her- Original Cindy is not in this chapter but will have a bigger role in future chapters. So enough of that, let's get to the chapter.

And as for making this less dark – well it's a process but within the next two chapters, the dawn will start to show. Figuratively speaking.

* * *

**Chapter Twelve**

**Missing the Signs**

* * *

Max hated listening to the surveillance taps. For one- they always ended up getting days upon days worth of pure garbage- that had no use and then only minutes here and there that could actually lead to the case. And in order to get those minutes- everything had to be listened to and transcribed.

There were people on the informant net that could do this- but Max could catch subtle noises and know which audio files to dissect on the computer.

At least the current disc she was on had the Steelheads fighting over the television and not engaging in something that couldn't be quite described as intercourse but more something that crossed the human-machine line. It was something Max was going to have to forget in order to maintain her sanity.

The lateness of the hour had gotten her to send Matt Sung home. He needed his sleep. So did Logan but Max didn't have the heart to tell him to stop. Logan looked all intense as he sat there- writing the conversation down. Even without his glasses- at least in public she could get him to wear ones with clear glass. Logan looked better somehow with his glasses than without. In any case- for some reason after his talk with the former detective- Logan had been making an effort these past two weeks to get involved with Eyes Only. It was not the same as it had been. Logan seemed to have the hardest time with Eyes Only in sharp contrast to his former obsession with his 'cause'.

The rain finally had stopped and Max smiled. She took Logan's earphones out. "Come on"

Logan looked at 452 weirdly; she seemed enthusiastic considering what they had just been doing for the last nine hours. "What?"

"We're going for a drive… I want to show you something"

* * *

He had no idea what 452 was trying to show him. It did feel like he had been here before, except Logan had this feeling last time that he had been the one to stay in the car. Furrow Air Base looked like it had been abandoned after some type of operation. That strange, familiar vibe he got told Logan that it had been illegal. There was an old person squatting in the corner behind a filing cabinet and Logan stayed far clear of him.

In the office- there were empty containers and on the ground a torn dirty magazine. Logan picked it up and looked at the cover- it was so yellowed and old. Dirt and a rip covered the title; the only word left visible of the title was the second half- 'world'.

There was nothing here, and Logan felt disappointed in the fact if this was meant to be one of those things that tripped his memory in- it was not working. And 452 had been unable to stop, smiling that big, wide smile of hers and looking at him the entire way here. It was so hard to put on this mask- that he was getting better and Logan didn't want her to know it was a lie.

He had to go back to the car eventually. Logan walked to the glassless window and climbed through it, it seemed all the broken parts had long ago been removed- but he could tell it had been broken by the shards on the ground. He moved past some of the broken down planes that were situated on the tarmac and wondered why 452 had been so specific on her directions for returning to the car.

Logan finally came to the right section of the fence and vaulted over to the other side. He landed, and the muddy water he had landed in sprayed upwards- covering him head to foot. He was knee deep in a mud filled hole- that obviously never got the chance to dry out and the recent rain made it worse. It was very cold, and it seemed to have not missed any place getting into his hair and clothes.

The car pulled up and Logan paused before he opened the door.

_The door slammed and Logan looked across at her and started the car – and she cut him off before he could say a word "Don't even think of speaking to me"_

He opened the door, and a cold wind made the mud feel even colder as it stuck his clothes to his skin. "You did that on purpose"

"Guilty as charged" 452 said, seeming to enjoy this- a little too much and Logan wondered if this had been more about getting him to remember- or some overdue form of payback. "I would have replicated this completely but Bronck kinda messed it up by shooting the guys who chased me that night"

"It's dangerous, being a bad guy" Those words just felt right and Logan didn't know where the thought came from.

452 nodded, starting the car. "Especially last year, before you got captured by Lydecker" Bronck had been the first person to snatch Logan- and Max wondered how things would have turned out if she hadn't danced around the relationship so much after that first time. If they hadn't been so messed up as people to start with, maybe they could have a normal relationship. It was ironic what made them so 'right' for each other was what made any kind of connection to the other so difficult. They had both been burned by the people in their pasts and it made trust the hardest task- like saving the world was the easy part.

* * *

Logan felt like with 452, he had to pretend to be fine. Because of how important it was- how much he just wanted her to be okay. He had spent so long and given up so much in Manticore just to keep her safe. But now out of there- he just wanted safe to include not having to worry about him. She meant so much to him, the things he could remember, the things he couldn't… it was better to give her what she wanted to see. And that meant at least trying to get back into Eyes Only.

Such as going to the Contact house and picking up things- letters of causes people wanted Eyes Only to help with, tips, messages, and things that had been checked over before they made their way up the chain. And they were all in the bag slung over his shoulder. He had volunteered to do it- because around 452 it was getting harder to keep up the façade of being okay. It frustrated him that it didn't come as easily as he thought it would out of Manticore. But at least doing this would put some of her fears at ease.

Logan walked into the elevator, and the doors began to close.

"Wait… I've almost there" Logan held in the button that kept the elevator open as the elderly Mrs. Moreno hobbled into the space. He was glad for the company- the elevator was too small a space- too confined… and he would have taken the stairs if it wouldn't have raised eyebrows. Mrs. Moreno lived on the higher part, of the split level penthouse floor above his apartment.

The old woman patted him on the arm. "You're a good young man- you should see some of the riff raff in the market- it's good you are back from your trip" For the most part 452 had used terrorists as the reasons for Logan's absence – a story gone wrong. But when it came to Mrs. Moreno- the decision seemed to have been made to not worry her. On a level Logan didn't understand- he was glad. Something in him liked Mrs. Moreno and felt a sense of responsibility for her.

"I'm glad too" The elevator began to move upwards.

"I missed our chats…"

Logan searched his mind, trying to bring something up about it. He knew that they hadn't always had them. He could see water drip onto the keyboard in front of him and he could remember feeling sorry for himself because of the wheelchair.

"_Maybe it would be better if I just died" _She had collapsed in the shower and had a moment that Logan knew all too well. Not wanting to get up again. It was Manticore's cruelty that most of the things he could dredge up from his mind were the bad times. But this time had a silver lining to it. It meant he could show an old woman he cared for, that someone cared whether she lived or died.

"Me too, Mrs. Moreno" When the elevator opened to his floor, Logan offered her a smile and moved to get off and a gentle hand touched his shoulder.

"If you don't mind an old woman's intrusion- Logan you don't look too well" Logan turned back to look at Mrs. Moreno who had this compassionate sympathy in her face. Like in some way- she knew something was not right. "It's impossible but if I didn't know better dear- I would say you had spent time in a war- I had an older brother who served in the Vietnam war and when he came back- it was like he had aged inside you could see it in the eyes…"

"It's impossible" Logan lied, cutting her off gently, and the lie hurt. When the doors closed separating them- Logan stood still in the hall a long time. Finally- he turned to get his key to return to the apartment from the bag and his eye caught on a small letter. It was addressed to Eyes Only- and it listed a fake address… rarely did return addresses match up with these things. But written on the slip of paper was a phone number. There were numbers at the front and numbers at the back of it that partially hid the fact it was a phone number at first glance. His designation in front and the designation at the back belonged to Biggs.

Logan balled up the piece of paper and threw it away as he entered the door. Matt Sung had returned and he and 452 were analyzing a particular moment of the surveillance tap on the computer- or he thought they were. 452 turned and turned off the audio file quickly.

It had sounded more like surveillance on some type of meeting but whatever it was about 452 clearly didn't want him to know about it- like he needed to be protected from it. And that bothered him on some level. "I'm taking a walk" Logan dropped the bag and moved towards the door.

"Logan, wait" Max followed after him, she had thought he would have been back later. Going through the part of a video feed from a meeting between Lydecker and the Committee, had been a really bad idea. The only good part was that a Committee member and not Lydecker had been speaking at the time. Max could only guess why he thought she wouldn't let him help. In the past going for a walk had been so much more significant. Now, now it was like he was pushing her away like he had before.

Logan looked at her. "Why- you obviously don't need me to help…" The words slipped out as a roll of the tongue.

Her eyes narrowed. "God Logan, I want you to stop this act"

"What, I'm different?" Logan asked and turned the handle to open the door. Max pushed it shut. "Manticore tends to do that to you remember… but I'm still me"

"Not exactly you aren't" Max fought to keep the anger out of her voice. "You are not dealing, you are not okay- okay isn't you doing this like you are some emotionless robot- and I'm not going to just watch you pretend to give a damn… you don't have to pretend with-"

"I'm not pretending 452, can you just please let me have space…okay?" Logan asked, his tone was low and it had a cold edge.

Max moved back as he went to leave again. How did she keep pushing the people in her life away so well? With Logan it felt so damn easy to fall back to protecting him- but Logan had never liked being protected by her… but that was with the wheelchair.

Since when did that extend to the cracks in his personality? There was something he wasn't telling her- and Matt wouldn't tell her because he thought Logan needed to do that one. And that there was something Logan wouldn't even tell him. It was funny in a twisted way- Logan was out of Manticore but they couldn't be further apart.

Something had to give here- she had to have something to show Logan how to open up again to whatever was keeping him from being himself- a guy who never backed down.

The Logan who had tried to use a vacation as a way to avenge restless spirits- she had never even gotten to have her smores in. And then a few months later Logan was in Manticore and Max would have taken the Eyes Only wilderness retreat a million times over if it would have meant getting him back.

This was a wrong and not just any old one. It was something that Max had to change- and it was the only way of ever getting Logan Cale back the way he was or as close as was possible after everything.

"That was a heated discussion, are you okay Max- ? I could go after him-"

"I will be…come on- listening to a group of sub human creeps isn't going to get any less boring- I think Logan just needs some time to himself, he'll come back once he's cooled off"

* * *

With all the people that lined the streets- walking and going about their day Logan felt a sharp stab inside. He had never really been much for crowds- before and with Manticore it had become worse. It felt like everyone was watching him on an irrational level. Now he watched each face- and it was as if any of them could be looking to come after him.

452 was right in that he was trying to pretend- that it was okay… but so was she. She was acting as if he was going to fall apart. He was already broken- he didn't need 452 to keep trying to prevent it- Logan needed her to be 'her'.

Or perhaps it was him. Maybe this just couldn't work anymore and Colonel Lydecker had already won. Logan could still see the phone number in his mind and he pulled out the cell phone in his hand. He didn't want to land back into Manticore- whether he could get better or if he couldn't. But this wasn't the Colonel- it was Biggs and it had to be safe to make a call on a secure line like the scrambled cell in his hand. And he wouldn't have to fake being together.

Logan chose an alley out of the sight of the main road and went behind a dumpster. He dialed in the number. It was to a message service- and the unsecure type. 846 had adopted some type of British accent- calling it a Sean Connery and the name sounded familiar in his head. Biggs then went on to say he wanted to meet up- that he wasn't looking to double date it with the Colonel. Blowfish Tavern in Sector Nine…

He disconnected the call and thought for a good long moment. He had never been to the bar in question- but he knew it was somewhere Biggs went when on the way back from a mission he kept off the report. But even if there was no TAC team- Logan still had vivid recollection of every time in training ending up on his back- looking up at Biggs.

It wasn't risk free. But right now Logan didn't want to care about that. Even if it was about returning to Manticore and as a result having to run out of there- Logan had to go. At least he recalled how to have a conversation with a member of the unit right. And he wouldn't feel so 'alone' inside.

Even Sector Nine, the high rise sector had its seedier attributes. Logan had scouted out the place before he even approached the entrance- the sun had about an hour before it went down and there was some sort of line of women out the back not wearing much at all- some getting in, some not. He had a bad feeling on why Biggs liked this particular place.

He returned to the front, and walked in past the bouncers. 846 knew how to pick a place based on the right combination of being seedy and the lack of scruples. Logan felt ashamed for even stepping into this place. Even without 452- this reduced woman to sex objects… as if they had no other purpose in the world. It felt offensive- and Logan took a wild guess that this was why 452 in her descriptions of dinners they had shared, called him a gentleman. That shouldn't be the result of treating people with respect regardless of gender… it should come naturally. For a moment- Logan felt a little like his old self.

The high of feeling like himself was short lived. For one he could see Biggs- clearly very pleased with himself. "Over here buddy!" Biggs called out and Logan moved to the table. Biggs slapped him on the shoulder. "Good to see you- you want a free dance- Verona here is top notch…"

"Thanks for the offer- but I'll pass" Logan couldn't help the sarcasm that slipped into his voice.

"Right… you have a girlfriend" Not the only reason. Biggs waited for him to sit down- waving Verona and a redhead out of the corner. "Two-fers and early opening… it's almost too much" Biggs looked Logan up and down. Logan suddenly regretted the white button down shirt, and dark corduroy pants. "You know out of Manticore … you can dress yourself, I mean does 452 like having a Ken doll or something?"

Logan gave a thin smile. "What do you want?"

Biggs was still snickering. "Sorry, I'm done… just so you know- you can relax, I'm not here to bring you back- I have a deep cover assassination later tonight and that means downtime while I wait for my window"

"So the Colonel didn't punish the unit for the escape" Logan couldn't hide the relief in his voice.

"Nope" Biggs looked to Logan. This was why he liked the computer geek so much- the man despite contamination by 09'ner rats thought about the consequences of leaving. "But 734's Psy Op tech…he's enjoying a nice long dirt nap- how stupid do you have to be to read a brain scan wrong?"

It was intended lightly but Logan felt a sting of guilt. He had never even thought what could happen as a result of his tampering with the file… he had thought that the Colonel would discover the computer and his actions. Joshua must have moved the machine and hidden it. That added to the blood on his hands.

"Pretty stupid" Logan murmured, trying not to let the conflicted thoughts show on his face. "So, who is the ten-zero-six on… you told me about it, so you must be sure I wouldn't do anything to put your mission in danger"

Biggs had been distracted momentarily as he watched one of the girls longingly and then brought his attention back in. "Yep, it's one of those mutual goals for both sides- Pierpont Lempkin stepped on some government toes and now he gets a nice target on his back for his troubles- cool- right?"

"I guess…" Logan felt… strange about the idea that a man that 452 was having trouble taking down and before all this he knew he had been after- was going to be taken out by Manticore. This was Lempkin who wasn't just a criminal, but the man who could potentially sell a weapon to a terrorist faction leading to something far more catastrophic than an electromagnetic pulse. It made sense that eventually Manticore would intervene. Still- there was just a bad feeling about taking someone out. Even if the man in question deserved it.

And then there was the other part of the equation- for every day spent gathering incriminating evidence that would one day bring Lempkin down, more people died due to his actions. None of Lempkin's inner circle were smart enough to take over his operations- the Marbury cartel would be crippled for years to come.

Was there a point where any means became justified, and was even necessary?

His cell phone went off, and Logan saw the number in the display. "I need to-"

Biggs waved a dollar bill in the air, and flashed Logan a smile. "Go ahead talk to 452, I'm guessing- I'll be fine"

Logan paused and then got up- making sure he was clear of anybody and moved into the cheap bathroom and the sound died from the room and he opened the flap. "Hey"

"Just 'hey'- Logan look… I'm sorry about earlier" She was apologizing but it felt wrong. It felt weird wanting different but Logan felt like 452 shouldn't have been backing down or letting him get away with not being able to get past things. "And I just called… to make sure you were okay"

Logan swallowed. "I'm fine… I'm just fine- I just needed space, it's all the things Manticore put in my head"

Out in the tavern, Biggs swore as Verona left for the second time. "I was in the middle of that"

"And we don't have much time" Alec said bluntly as he leaned on the table. "Lempkin will be at the function in about forty five minutes… which means you need to get Logan over there"

Biggs tore his eyes from the stripper and focused in on Alec, and his expression went dark. "I don't like using him Alec…"

Alec took a look at the bathroom door and sat on the edge of the seat. There was enough background noise to block any chance that Logan could hear this. "It's not like that and you know it- besides he won't know… I show up because is Lempkin and Eyes Only… 452 is likely to be there- all coincidences… Eyes Only gets an emergency tip on the subject which will bring her down- I go after her and bring in the TAC team- it's all over with" He got back up. "If it makes it any better the Colonel will be so happy to have 452 back that Logan will be spared this time round… all you have to get Logan to do is be there while you kill this guy"

It didn't. And judging from 494's expression- Alec wasn't too happy about this either. But it was necessary- they hadn't even been guaranteed that 208 would get the letter. But if this hadn't gone ahead- Logan would start to, move past the reprogramming and deal with it. And then Psy Ops would at some point be necessary after recapture. In a way this was for him as much as it was about retrieving 452. They were doing him a favor.

* * *

Max hung up the phone. That had been… off. For one Logan had said he would be back later and then asked her about any military activity she had picked up. Max had just said a blanket no. It could have been just his paranoia and she didn't want him to wig out. But Logan asked it in relation to Pierpont Lempkin.

"Is Logan okay?"

She frowned, drawing up her records on good old Pierpont Lempkin's movements for the last twenty four hours. "I'm not sure"

But Max was going to find out what this was about. Because there had been increased military activity within the city- and she looked at the bag. "Matt- I need you to check with the contact house… ask them what arrived today"

She redialed Logan's cell but it wouldn't go through. Max's frown deepened.

"Something's up"

* * *

_**To Be Continued…**_

* * *

Okay… when we pick up next chapter it will be the same night and pretty much not long later. Please review… it really brightens my day and makes it easier to write more. Reviews are the only things that work better than coffee. I hope to have the next chapter up soon.


	13. Learning To Run

Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel- I just play with the universe it created. The title for this chapter was going to be last chapter's title but it ended up more appropriate for this chapter which carries on the story from the last chapter pretty much as straight continue on.

Sorry for the late update- I got a cold… irony of all ironies since it's summer.

* * *

**Chapter Thirteen**

**Learning to Run**

* * *

Logan had gone with Biggs for more than the X5's promise that if he came along and listened to why he should come back to Manticore- he would just leave him out of any report- just like that. It was a convenient excuse. It was more about being there and answering his own question- ends, means- justified?

He hadn't an inkling why it mattered so much but the other side of him- that usually added something to the picture was silent.

They made it past the sector checkpoint and Logan looked at the pass carefully. "This is just a basic sector pass- Manticore can give you access to ones with less restrictions"

Biggs took it back. "Ah, but then it'll stick out later when everyone scrambles to figure how someone slipped past the cracks to take out Lempkin… no this is much better and it doesn't stick out in the checkpoint guard's mind…"

Logan took some comfort in the fact he hadn't been thinking on that track- although now it was all he could think about.

About which entrance to the building that would be used- which angle would be used to ensure the highest degree of accuracy when it came to taking out the target and crowd control- and the soldier was finally giving him silence. But then he was doing exactly what it wanted- a mission. And maybe that was the problem- trying to do the Eyes Only tasks like a mission… like any soldier would. But how could he admit to 452 over any kind of fear when she seemed to be holding back as well? It was like there was something missing that had been there before… some balance. It wasn't there anymore.

* * *

According the checkpoint records, ten hours ago a military convoy had entered Sector One. Max drew up the records for the neighboring sectors side by side. The thing that grabbed her attention was the whole convoy not actually leaving the sector.

She frowned and pulled the satellite images. Manticore issue vehicles, it had to be them. But the thing that really struck her as wrong was the-

Max turned her head at a noise- the front door hadn't opened. Getting up slowly, she saw a silhouette that didn't match Matt Sung's through the frosted glass of the partition. She waited until the person had moved to come into her area and swung her leg out. Zack blocked the kick and then sent her to the ground. "Not good enough Max- if I had been the enemy…"

"It would explain much" Max got to her feet, wondering if it'd kill Zack to be a normal brother and give her hand. Or just not to creep into the apartment. "So how's Brin?"

"She's safe" Zack put it simply.

Max shrugged her shoulders. "I don't suppose you'll tell me where?"

Zack didn't smile. "You know how this works Max- and even if I was in the habit of compromising their safety, you would be the one I wouldn't tell" Unlike Logan- Max had no great fantasy scenarios about saving her brother. He'd still be the same old Zack- she would still bail his ass out every time- but she doubted he would ever learn to stop acting the way he did. "Where's Logan?"

"Not here" Max swallowed her pride. "And I think he's in trouble" She sat back down at the main computer screen and Zack straightened out a crumpled piece of paper. She read the phone number twice. She could read the numbers on the back of Logan's neck- that explained the 208 first false part of the number. "Who is 846?"

"494's second in command…defective personality" She kept back the 'so he has one' as she connected the phone, and dialed. The service told her the message in question no longer existed. "Logan got attached to the unit we were stuck in…"

"He's not been captured… at least not yet" Max said, and the phone rang. She hit the answer key. "Go for Max"

"You aren't going to believe this but we just got a tip in- apparently there's going to be a hit on Pierpont Lempkin in two hours"

Max frowned. "Anything else?"

"Someone matching Logan's description was the passenger with another man entering Sector One"

"Thanks Matt" Max hung up and pulled up what she could- the thing was the military convoy was situated on the other side of the sector to where Pierpont Lempkin would be. "This makes no sense… so Lydecker uses …does he have a name?"

"Biggs"

Max didn't want to know how Captain Dick's 2IC, came by the name. "Biggs to get Logan- to a hit at a function with Pierpont Lempkin as the hit- someone Eyes Only has had eyes on for over a year… what's Lydecker's angle here?"

_Lydecker hadn't really been trying- not that it bothered Zack- his absence made Psy Ops easier to resist. The techs didn't even push him as hard -the bastard knew he could take it and so sessions with Lydecker were much more extreme. So it really was their own failure on the way back to his cell that killed the two guards taking him back. This section of Manticore made it that any escape attempt- wouldn't make it upstairs without detection. Even if escape was out of the question- Zack was going to use his time to case the area._

_This facility was inherently different from the one they had escaped from in Gillette. All the laboratories, the morgue and the part of Manticore used for experimentation had been moved next to Psy Ops. So crossing into them was not too hard a task. Zack still found it affected him to stare at the centre of the room, the gurney- not unlike the one years ago he had been on. There was blood on the sheets, and it obviously had been in use recently because it was drenched with sweat. Empty vials of various drugs sat side by side needles. The metal cased report, sat on the side and Zack opened it._

_And decided that it would have been better if he hadn't. Zack had known Logan Cale was still alive- he was the reason Lydecker had been missing supervising the Psy Op sessions on occasion. And Zack had felt no regret for the knowledge that it meant Cale was being tortured personally instead. He was just a normal guy- eventually Logan would die as a result and get to escape all this. And in the meantime- Zack would have a chance for a clear mind. What the hell was Lydecker doing to Logan Cale- having the scientists do?_

_Zack knew the bastard had been interested in Cale. He had spent so much time as they prepared for the mission seeking him out- talking to him. Zack had the moment of weakness when Max had taken off with Cale- to tell Lydecker to stay away from him. Apparently there had been a reason behind Lydecker's interest. Zack put the report down and moved to the adjoining door. Through the wired glass- he could see Cale alone. Zack broke off an IV line and used it to wire the door open._

"_Thank god"_

_Zack had never seen Cale look so relieved to see him. Logan Cale was restrained to the bed, although judging from the pallor of his skin- Zack doubted the man could stand let alone- run anywhere. "Excuse me?"_

_Logan seemed to get the confusion. "Well you aren't Lydecker…or one of his… I think calling them sadists is an understatement for them…" It was an awkward moment- they hadn't gotten along outside of Manticore and it made things difficult. "I'm such an idiot"_

"_For getting involved with us?"_

"_No" Logan said. "…it doesn't matter"_

_Zack had looked over the small windowless room- there was no surveillance equipment or anything else- but there was a camera in a broken angle and it looked recent. He undid the restraints. "Tell me- it's not like I was going to get out of here- and you're not taking a step without collapsing…" Logan had tried to sit up but vertigo made him lay right back down. At least he tried._

"_There was an ex Manticore doctor-Vertes" Logan's voice was colored with regret. "My miraculous re-ability to walk wasn't so much of a miracle- when Max gave me a transfusion her blood cells repaired the damage. But the new tissue was being attacked by my body and all I could think about was that I wouldn't be able to walk anymore- that I wouldn't be whole- I don't think you could understand"_

"_Better than you think I would Cale- for me- without my legs I'd be unable to protect the others I understand needing to be strong"_

"_I don't think I trusted her- I was just so desperate to keep walking and then Vertes sold us out to Manticore"_

_Zack frowned. "Max told me about that, but she said you got away clean"_

"_We thought we did- turns out Vertes had a real agenda for helping me- apparently I fit this experiment just right and she was using me. Max managed to pull my records but somehow Lydecker figured out it was me- this happening to me now, all of it is my fault"_

"_Maybe- but I would have done the same thing… although that would include keeping the doctor on ice until she completed the job and then getting rid of the risk"_

_Logan's wry smile was very small; it was overshadowed by the pain. "Part of the reason I thought you could be Lydecker was because he comes in here, after he has the 'doctors" His sarcastic emphasis on the word 'doctors' was very noticeable. "-play… he comes in here to talk… or what passes for what he thinks is a civilized conversation. Everything that I've done as Eyes Only- he thinks I should do whatever is necessary to affect change- even if it means killing the bad guys"_

"_Why don't you?"_

"_Well I used to just tell Lydecker it was because things should be guided by a moral compass- doing what's right" Logan actually smiled now- despite the pain. "Now I just say because I am not an immoral soulless monster with delusions of grandeur" _

"It's about Logan" Zack answered, "Lydecker couldn't send up this kind of situation in Manticore so he did it here… somehow Lydecker is going to get Logan to kill this guy…I'll go you should stay here"

Max pulled her earpiece out. "No way… besides he knows I'll come in- but he doesn't know about you- we can use that" she looked at Zack who was pensive for a moment. "Are you with me here Zack?"

"_It's bad Cale. Psy Ops leaves nothing to be overstated and it is everything Max would have told you- she probably held back"_

"_I'm going to have deal with it- how do I keep Lydecker from what I know"_

"_Cloud your mind, misinformation- uses the coding from the tech you work with- learn to forget what you know…" Zack could hear an alarm go off. "You can fight them… just don't forget why you are doing this"_

"I'm with you"

* * *

_**Seattle- Sector One**_

* * *

"I said sorry- don't be such a girl" Biggs walked through to the hallway passage. Logan had been careful not to hit the security guard that hard but he should not have had to deal with him to start with. This was 846's mission, not his.

The hall- formerly at some point used for theatrical productions had been refitted into something for city functions. On the main floor below were the tables spread out, a space for Seattle's finest and most crooked to waltz, and there was a higher floor that ran a passage that with its railing you could see straight down into the crowd on both sides.

A perfect position to sit and take a sniper shot at someone from. Logan watched as Biggs opened his case and started to put together the rifle. "You don't really think I'm going to agree to come back"

"No" Biggs said, shrugging as he screwed the silencer onto the nozzle of the gun. "But I get to try and that's better than just letting 452 turn you against us"

"She's not like that"

"You mean she doesn't broadcast her opinion that all of us who stay instead of bailing are mindless little drones… and the fact she hates us because we do follow orders"

Logan chose not to answer that and it wasn't even the pain of the drone comment in relation to what 452 had said to him earlier. It was because sometimes those orders were wrong- and Logan could remember all the times he had the choice. Follow orders and be X9 208 or defy Manticore and be sent to Psy Ops for it.

Even if it was Manticore without the Psy Ops- it just wasn't ever going to be something Logan could conceive to do- to make that choice if he got the chance. It would be choosing to live in a world of grays where color didn't even exist.

He stared out at the crowd, and did a double take. For a moment Logan had thought he had seen Alec. Logan wanted to dismiss it as being in his head. He could almost let himself believe it.

Logan tore his eyes from the scene and moved to leave. Even if Biggs hadn't called him in, and Alec was just here hoping to run into 452- he couldn't risk getting drawn into a fight with Alec.

And then he heard footsteps running up the stairs. Two men in suits- probably along for the night already had their guns out. He recognized them from the dossier on Pierpont Lempkin. Biggs ran forward, and pushed them into each other. They hit the wall and Biggs gave Logan the thumbs up with both hands. "Two-fers" He slammed them both at the same time, knocking them out.

"I suppose you want praise for that one"

Biggs smirked and then the expression dropped from his face as the door opened behind Logan. He didn't want to look behind him but Logan did. Colonel Lydecker approached his attention on Biggs. Logan knew that the Colonel wasn't worried he was going to run. Logan felt as if his feet were chained to the spot he was standing on. "X5 846- stand down- you are to guard the entrance up here- no one gets past you"

"Yes sir" Biggs moved past Logan. He had been set up- and judging from the look on the X5's face Biggs hadn't known the Colonel would be here- but it was cold comfort.

Logan couldn't look at Colonel Lydecker- all he could do was stare down at the crowd and try to swallow, his mouth dry. He had walked straight into this. Zack had told him time and time again he couldn't trust Unit Five. And that extended even to Biggs- the unit mate who insulted his masculinity and always seemed to be looking out for him- without Alec's double agenda. He could see Pierpont Lempkin, eating down there and all he could think of was that Lempkin would walk away again today… to hurt and kill more people. "There never was a kill order on Lempkin, was there sir?" The respect of rank came out involuntarily and Logan hated himself for it.

The Colonel put his hand on his shoulder and Logan flinched. "There is… but 846 will not be carrying it out- you will be"

"No" The refusal sounded weak, even to Logan.

"You've killed before- all you need is your trigger. The target isn't a philanthropist; he is a man who will cause much more ill the longer he lives. All you are being asked to do is end it" Colonel Lydecker removed his hand. "I'll make it easier- it's an order"

Kneeling down, Logan picked up the gun that Biggs had left and adjusted his position- to stay steady. He stared down the scope, feeling his heart slow down. Logan rested his finger on the trigger as he found Lempkin.

"Fire when you have the shot X9 208"

* * *

Max had slipped in via the service door and found herself on the edge of the floor. "Come on Logan where are you?" She scanned the crowd and then looked up. Up on some type of upper walkway was Lydecker, and Logan – with Logan about to take the shot. Anyone who couldn't see like her- couldn't see how much this was tearing Logan up. She knew he couldn't fight Lydecker.

"Can't believe I have to save your subhuman ass" Max muttered and started to run, and anyone who could see anything- could only see a flash of hair and black leather. She heard the shot slice through the air as she pushed Pierpont Lempkin down.

The shot hit past the seat where he had just been and then into the wall. "Thank you"

Max grimaced. "Don't remind me- get out of here" She stared upwards to where she could see Lydecker vanishing and 494 pushing Logan to the ground and the second male X5 joined him.

* * *

It didn't matter that the metal of the handcuffs dug in; as Logan was dragged to his feet- he realized why the other Logan had been silent. Because he already knew it was wrong- but there was something wrong in his mind. Psy Ops had gone so far- and taken so much that he couldn't stand up to the one person he needed to- the Colonel.

"If it means anything Logan" Alec started. "I didn't know Colonel Lydecker planned to make you take the shot"

"No" Logan said, surprising himself. "It doesn't"

Alec used a second set to secure him to the railing as Biggs stayed completely silent. He couldn't look at him. And Logan saw 452 emerge into view. "Run"

"I'm not leaving you" Max said, holding back the part about kicking his ass for this later. She looked at 494's partner in crime. "Biggs, I'm guessing"

"Wow- and you must be 452, wait you have a name too right, it's just Boyfriend doesn't know it"

"Is that all you've got"

So this was what being double teamed by two X5s felt like. 494 started to try to pick her up her from behind. It would have been no problem except for Biggs hitting her in front. Max flipped behind Biggs so that Captain Dick could land the punch on him instead.

Only they caught on quickly and a solid kick sent her back into the railing next to Logan and she could feel the sharp pain from the metal indenting into it.

Max had to get back forward to stop from falling over the edge, and 494 took the moment to throw her into the wall.

Logan could only watch as the two soldiers drove 452 down again and again. He looked over and he caught sight of Zack aiming a grappling hook onto one of the ceiling supports. Zack caught his eye and made a sign.

He gave a small nod and waited as 494 stepped back towards him. Three, two one… Logan ignored the pain and held onto the railing, sweeping his legs under Alec's. Alec went down and 452 took the moment to push Biggs forward out of range.

Zack swung across and landed- his boot on 494's chest."Don't get up-" The next blow was enough to concuss him, and Zack took the keys from his pocket. He then moved to undo Logan- and put Alec in his place.

452 sent a flurry of jabs at Biggs and launched off the wall to pin him to the ground. Then she moved up off him.

With the three of them she doubted Biggs would try anything. "In case you're wondering – your TAC team support is currently enduring mechanical failure…"

"Lydecker got away" Zack said, interrupting Max's attempt to rub in the loss. Lydecker had a talent for getting out of dodge when someone was gunning for him. And it was a bitter pill to swallow that she couldn't kill the man.

Logan knew all of this, tonight was his fault. None of this would have happened if he had just been able to ignore the invitation. "452- I"

Max shook her head. "It's okay Logan – we'll get into this when we're out of here" She squeezed his hand, and Zack had already started to leave and kept shooting her looks to hurry up.

"Logan, and I mean this – no jokes now" Bigg's voice made Logan pause and he looked back at the younger man. "Despite what happened, which we in no way intended- this was for you… you stay with those two" Zack shot Biggs a dark glare and the other X5 sneered back. "… Manticore will get you back and you won't be left with a mind- remember how 734 used to be- that could be you"

Logan didn't know why but some weight felt like it had been lifted. "You really shouldn't worry about me"

Biggs shook his head, standing gingerly and putting his hands up to make sure Zack wouldn't throw him over the railing or something. "Of course I have to you idiot. You are part of our unit- and I won't them drag you down"

"Too late- actually before my time in Manticore was too late" Logan understood why Biggs had tried what he had. Even forgave him for it. He just couldn't forget it and so Logan said what he should have said the first moment he saw Biggs tonight. "I'm sorry but I'm not part of your unit and I will never go back there". He joined Zack and 452. He walked down the stairs with them not looking back.

* * *

_**Fogle Towers Apartment**_

* * *

"It was stupid Logan, of all the trusting, best of intentions things you could have done this was the worst" Zack drove the point home. He had spent the better part of the last twenty minutes dressing down Logan over the night's events. Unlike Max who Zack was sure tuned him out most times- Logan was actually listening to him.

First he had gotten Logan to recount the events. And then Zack had deliberately went over every mistake he had made starting from the big one of actually calling the message- and to allowing emotions and sentiments to control him.

"It won't happen again" Logan said, his back to the window. "They are the enemy…it's funny how out of Manticore it's much easier to get that"

"Good" Zack said harshly and then relaxed slightly. "You know you're part of this unit- which means if you pull a stunt like that again it'll be your last- and that goes for you as well"

He could see Max from the corner of his eye.

Max crossed her arms, and looked away. They both knew things happened- and it wouldn't be the last time that Lydecker tried something. But it was the last time for awhile at least he would exploit whatever bond had existed between that unit and Logan. It wasn't gone- but it had been damaged when Logan had stopped letting them manipulated him. "I'm crashing"

He could see Max's surprise. "You're not leaving?"

"The way I see it I don't have a choice- if I don't you'll get the both of you captured" He could just see the retort forming in her mind, but Zack didn't give her the chance as he moved to the guest room. It was more like he was going to wait until the moment Logan was more or less completely himself again and push the Seattle issue. Not to say he wasn't going to try and get Max to leave before the fact.

Max was used to listening to being ripped out by Zack. She was very good at tuning parts out- others hurt like hell. But it had been a new one to listen to Zack dig into Logan. She also had no illusions about why he was sticking around. But she wasn't going to push it. No matter how much she envied how much closer Logan seemed to be with Zack. She waited until he had left the room to speak.

"About this morning…" Max smiled, they had both started speaking at the same time. "You first"

Logan looked at 452, trying to come out with what he was thinking without sounding like he was crazy. "I'm sorry about that… you started to act the way I remembered from before all this started and…"

Max was quick to shake her head. "It's fine- I'm adjusting- I know you need compassion- for me to be nice after all-"

It was his turn to cut her off. "Actually it's better that way. 452- it's hard trying to be who I used to be- it's not that I don't care about Eyes Only- it's that I'm scared and have no other way to deal than to hide behind a mask because I don't want you to have to worry about me"

"So in other words, and I will use this against you later- you don't like the nice me" Max found it amusing. She had always acted the way she had around others but Logan was the one guy that hadn't pushed away. "I can stop being so nice- but I can't stop worrying about you- not after everything"

Logan nodded. "I understand"

Max watched him for a moment, and hid her smile. "Good, because I am scarier than Zack and I will kick your ass until you need the wheelchair if you ever bail out on me again like that again…another thing, stop shaving… you look stupid without that beard of yours"

"If I want to shave, I can if I want to"

"No you can't- and stop wasting the water, I get Manticore doesn't let you have hot showers but if you take all the water and my bath is cold one more time- I'm gonna have to kill you"

_I almost lost Logan tonight- but it seems like we've gotten back one of the pieces of what we used to be from Lydecker of all people. So we start small- and start building the castle back up, block by block. And one day- hopefully we'll be where we were when we admitted how we felt. I used to think hope was for losers- but it's what keeps people strong. It keeps them living and always running. And that's what I got back tonight. _

_Hope._

* * *

_**To Be Continued…**_

* * *

No cliffhanger… I was nice- okay, please review- and make a hot day bearable.

Chapter Completed: 13/3/10 or 3/13/10.


	14. What Was Forgotten

Disclaimer: You would think by this point I'd stop saying this but I'm not taking the chance- I don't own Dark Angel. Logan makes glasses cool- and I should know because I have to wear mine for reading and writing. Just not the silly looking ones he had for a lot of the second season.

Before the question is asked- yes Max and Logan are getting all reconnected but nothing's gonna happen until he's better- and not calling her 452. When they are written sharing the same bed- it is much more for the company thing. Not the 'mind in the gutter' reason.

* * *

**Chapter Fourteen**

**What Was Forgotten**

* * *

Max liked to think that before, when she had met up with Zack for the first time in ten years, that she had not realized how annoying it really would be to actually have him stick around for more than a day.

He woke up like clockwork and did a sweep of the apartment on every hour at night- which disturbed Logan because he was now as paranoid as they were. He never helped with the Eyes Only missions but that didn't stop him from criticizing some aspect of a plan or asking 'what the point was' of making sure that hospital administrators didn't get away with looking the other way while drugs needed to treat patients were stolen.

Zack kept teaching Logan how to improve his hand to hand sparring- as in how to inflict the more damage faster, and kept giving him advice… as in controlling emotions- and viewing them as a weakness. As if they really needed to further ingrain the twisted lessons Manticore had tried to teach Logan. And when Logan let slip Ben was alive- Zack had chosen to tell her that not knowing was for her own good. She had really seen red at that. It was easier to be mad at Zack for that. Then she didn't have to think about how Ben was being tortured in Manticore right now… Max had her nightmares for that. And Max felt bad enough because she hadn't wanted to do what Ben had asked of her. And it made Max feel guilty for being glad her brother was alive, that she hadn't killed him. But knowing that what she had done hadn't been enough to save Ben from Lydecker, was even worse.

And right at this moment, as Max walked in the door- she heard Zack answer the phone and she could hear Original Cindy asking for her.

This couldn't end well.

"I think Max has made it pretty clear she wants nothing further to do with you- you are a liability and you should accept that and-"

Max yanked the receiver from his hand and moved away from Zack. "I am so sorry Cindy, and he's wrong- it was about me being a danger to – he's just a jerk okay- so ignore him, that's what I do" she said, a fixed stare in Zack's direction. Max didn't care if what she said annoyed Zack, in fact it would be a bonus to get under his skin for a change.

"Its aiight Boo- it got you on the phone, didn't it?"

"I suppose so" Max said quietly, wishing to hell it could be a different way- that this conversation could end up going the other way than how she knew it had to go.

On the other end, Max could hear Original Cindy chuckle. "Well your brotha- isn't good for impressions- he's worse on the phone, there was that time when he called up lookin' for you and I told him you weren't here and he just hung up like that"

Max found her mind drifting to all the times her friend had gotten involved in her life- wondering if it was possible for it to already be too late. It was selfish but Max hated giving Cindy up. That and Zack was making clear signs to end the conversation so he could tell her never to speak to Original Cindy again. "Well, I should go" Max said finally.

"Max, be safe- you hear me girl?"

"I hear you" Max ended the call, feeling her mood sink further. "Not a word" she snapped at Zack and she walked into the master bedroom. He followed until Max slammed the door less than an inch from hitting his face. Max glared at the closed door. If only she had done it a second later- it might have hit him. Damn.

Zack knew that nothing would come of waiting for her to get out or just going in. He would have to bring up the subject of doing a better job to keep the liabilities out of her life if Max insisted on the course of action that kept her and Logan in Seattle. Except for the weekend- Max had arranged some type of downtime in a town north of here called 'Cape Haven', away from Seattle.

It wasn't the type of thing Zack approved of- for one Max had admitted to them having been there before. What if one of the locals ended up tipping Lydecker- Max was taking a risk in the hope that a past reminiscence would help Logan improve further.

* * *

Logan found the sights on the side of the road on the way to Cape Haven… familiar. It was a good thing he had taken a look at the map briefly before they left because he didn't want to interrupt the silence between 452 and Zack. Logan was not ignorant to the tension between them, but Logan had gained a good sense for when he had to keep his head down while he was in Manticore. And he was not ignorant to the irony in that.

Leaning over, 452 turned on the stereo system in the Aztek- and a slow melodic tune played out. Logan frowned and looked over at her briefly. "I know that from the…I'm not sure what it was-a dream- or in a… car"

452 beamed at him "That's right- remember when my face got plastered all over Seattle…and we were headed to your uncle's cabin" Max had known he was going to say the car but it sounded almost as if he remembered it from that dream, the first time. She didn't believe in all that new age-y junk- but this was different, it was something they had together. And she wondered then- if she should ask him if he had another one… while Logan was in-

"All that attention and you still didn't leave Seattle"

Now Logan was looking firmly at the road, as Max tried to not look back just to give Zack a dirty look. Or take one look, get Logan to pull over and throw Zack on the side of the road. Max focused back in on Logan as she recalled that day. And it made her think about how Logan had known he was in dire straits- how just maybe if those fragments hadn't moved and caused all those problems- he might have come with her. Logan could have saved America as they knew it in other places…and they wouldn't be in this place now. Logan had been hurt by her past and couldn't even remember her name all because of her screwed up life. If Logan had just been able to come with her, there wouldn't be a barcode on the back of his neck. Max slumped back in her seat and tried not to let her frustration or self pity show.

Logan cleared his throat. "I would have missed you" She glanced at him, surprised. "I wanted to ask you not to go- even though I knew you had to"

And she smiled again.

The music was soothing in a way Logan couldn't explain- it just seemed to bring up all these memories he had thought he had lost forever. Watching her leave the car and seeing 452 stop and come back to him.

* * *

_**Cape Haven**_

* * *

The car came to a stop and it was unsurprising that Zack was the first one to get out. It had been all she could do to stop him from getting out when they had been greeted on the way into town by Hallahan and his friends. The greeting was friendlier this time but all Zack seemed to see was the threat with the guns. Max had actually tried to get him not to come at all- but she realized it was let him- or Zack would find his way here and stalk them the entire time.

Max looked at Logan who seemed to be staring at the house with a troubled expression on his face.

He saw her watching him and quickly got out. Something had clearly rattled him and Max had no idea what- it wasn't as if he had actually killed Pierpont Lempkin. Max finally got out of the car and smiled as she caught sight of Sage… or Sam running towards them. On the phone a few nights ago- Max had been able to catch up him when she had arranged this. He was still going by Sage- but the boy was much happier than he had been before the truth had come out.

"Easy Zack" Max said- and smiled at the fourteen year old.

"Hi Max…" Sage said and the front door opened as Trudy walked out of the house. It was funny what could change in less than a year… and it was one of those things in life that when you dealt with the people who had been threatening everything for years- how much brighter a place could become.

It was something that had happened because Logan had pulled a fast one- to try and get someone to stand up and testify- to right a wrong that had been committed so many years ago.

"It's good to see you two here again" If Trudy was shocked by Logan not being in a wheelchair she didn't show it. Max pulled out the envelope and held it out. "Max, I can't after all you and Logan did for us last time"

Max nodded. "Yes you can- it's okay" Finally Trudy accepted the money and Max could just see Zack vanish into the brush. He was probably going to canvas the entire area for its weaknesses and the best escape routes. That would keep Zack occupied for awhile and out of her hair. Logan had followed Sage into the house and Max was stuck wondering- what had the hesitation been for?

Trudy finally came out with the question Max had known was coming. "What happened- I thought the paraplegia was permanent- some kind of miracle?"

"I wish"

Logan couldn't stop seeing that night. It was like he was back at that moment- he could still see the explosion he had triggered and the bullets he fired killing. The wire he had put up, and it catching B.C's right hand man in the throat. It didn't matter if Logan kept refusing to kill- because at the end of the day he wasn't just capable. He had a trigger- and he did kill people. He was no better a person than anyone back at Manticore.

He broke out of his thoughts and he could see Sage staring at him. "You are pretty tall"

"Shorter in a wheelchair"

Sage bobbed his head and Logan could see a flash of the teenager crouched down under the end table, frozen by his past. "So how are you adjusting… with what happened?"

"Sort of, it's kinda hard sometimes" Sage admitted and looked down at the burn on the inside of his hand. The imprint of the door knob he had looked at all those times and still not understood until Max had come into his life. "I think I always knew like --- said, I was just hiding but I don't have to anymore…"

And Logan remembered why. "The people who killed your parents"

"It all was okay in the end- at least now I remember- it's okay to remember now" From outside, Trudy called, and Sage flashed Logan one of those fake all-suffering looks. In truth it looked like despite the lie- things had worked out in the end for those two as a family. "Bye Logan"

Logan watched him leave and there was just something on his mind. Ever since he had gotten out of Manticore- things had started to come back to him- and as time went on it was becoming easier to put his memories back together. But he still didn't remember his parents at all- even though he knew he had them and that they had given him his name. And that no matter what he did- 452's name – his mind just wouldn't let him hear it. At first Logan had thought Manticore was to blame- but now Logan wasn't so sure that they were the only reason behind it.

Max watched Logan from the outside, and she looked out to where Zack was. Asking Logan what was wrong would probably go nowhere- he was pretty good when it came to the little things but when it came to the big things like Psy Ops- he clammed up real tight. She got how much Manticore could make it so that forgetting the past was the easier path. All the nightmarish, dark things they did to him in there- Logan only opened up with one person in there. And only Zack would know why Logan was sitting on the floor in the middle of the room, staring out into space like something was happening behind his eyes.

Knowing she had to ask Zack made Max wish drinking gasoline was the alternative option.

* * *

"You're asking for my help?" There wasn't any sarcasm in his voice, but there was a tempered mild surprise. Max had found Zack out in the middle of the burnt out Gilan property- there was no afternoon sun, just a cold wind… and maybe even snow. Of all the childhood experiences she had missed out on- Max had no real desire to play with the dirty frozen water that reminded her vividly of the escape.

Max rested a hand on the burnt out door frame. "Yes, so are you going to tell me or not?"

Zack nodded. "Okay- you can start by telling me what happened here"

"It was supposed to be a vacation- you know from Manticore and Eyes Only- but Logan wasn't so good at the taking a break part" Max shrugged. "Turned out finding some witness to some journalists being killed wouldn't be what we found. The kid you saw, Sage- this was his house and after the Pulse this prize moron and his idiot friends thought because his parents had gotten power- that they had seen it coming"

"It sounds like they were just well prepared for any contingency"

"Didn't say these guys were smart- anyway they killed his parents- and burnt this place down- everyone thought the whole family died. Trudy found Sage and until last year it was all going fine. Then I stuck my nose in, figured out that Sage was Sam Gilan. So the killers came after us- only I was going through some really bad seizures… so it was all up to Logan- he had no choice"

Zack crossed through to outside and Max followed him. "He killed them- all from a wheelchair?"

Max nodded and then groaned as she caught sight of the look on Zack's face. "Don't look so impressed about it- Logan wasn't happy about it at the time but I thought he understood he couldn't blame himself for deaths like that"

"It could have been he didn't at the time" Zack said calmly. "In Manticore during that month before you rescued him and he was in Psy Ops- he killed a guard. Logan broke- and it was what got him so close to becoming one of them before you came in" He paused for a second. "And when 846 was attempting his retrieval- he told Logan about an executed tech- which happened because Manticore blamed the tech for not seeing that Brin had broken free of her brainwashing after the file was altered by Logan"

"He blames himself for one of 'their' deaths- that's not fair, they deserve whatever comes to them"

"I told him that and that changing the computer file had been my call- he still blames himself for their deaths" Zack was standing next to her, looking out into the county side. "Lydecker calls it a flaw of his character and I hate agreeing with anything that bastard says but-"

Max shook her head. "It's not a flaw…but Logan can't blame himself for deaths that are out of his control… I mean Manticore is who is really to blame here"

And for so much more than just that.

"You should tell him"

Typical Zack, it wasn't said with a smile, just as if it was only a fact and it would improve the chances of mission success. She knew that it wasn't in Zack to not act the way he did - then why had it been bothering her so much?

"Why would that help- he seems to listen to you and… he's more himself around you…" And there it was- said out loud more or less that she was jealous of how close Zack seemed to be with Logan- even if that relationship had come out of being trapped inside of Manticore together. And that was really sick.

"Max some of the others actually listen to me, in Manticore Logan made the choice to trust me and I looked out for him. I also knew, and got used to reading his body language better than anyone else in there. It's because of the training- but to him I'm still his C/O- it was that or let 494 take that role" Zack snorted at the idea. "Logan still follows your lead, because you are all that he thinks about – in Manticore that wasn't a bad thing- it kept him going but out here is could get him killed or worse"

_

* * *

_

_Zack had no intention of co-operating with the training. He would not let Lydecker win and be some obedient mindless, loyal soldier. Not like Brin. It nauseated him every time he saw her following him and carrying out his every order._

_He thought of snapping her neck- like Max had with Ben to save him from Manticore. But he couldn't bring himself to let go of the weak desire inside of him that somewhere very deep down his sister could be still alive. Zack knew better- and promised himself he would get there._

_The unit Lydecker had him placed in- hated him with a vengeance. To them, he was nothing but a traitor and they did everything in their power to try and get to him. But if he could resist Psy Ops- there was no chance of him allowing himself to be baited by them. _

_As his guard escort escorted him back to his cell in isolation- the metal door leading to the Psy Ops division opened. Logan Cale- Zack had known that when the scientists were finished Lydecker would have him sent to Psy Ops- but he had thought it would have been in another day or so._

_Logan looked as if he was unconscious and the guards did little but throw him into the cell. As Zack was locked in his own cell and the guards moved away- he realized that he needed to get in there- to be there when Cale regained awareness. Zack stared at the guards on point- included the one who stayed behind that was slightly shorter than the others and definitely new. Zack have overheard him this morning being lectured by a handler for being within arm distance of the transhumans. And the guard had definitely been showing the weakness of compassion towards him earlier._

_Zack stood and went to the door of his cell- looking out through the grate. Coaxing the guard over took- time like a deer in the headlights moving towards a potential death. "I won't kill you- I just want to make sure he's okay"_

"_I don't know" The guard's light hair contrasted with the uniform. "If the Colonel found out-"_

"_I won't tell him…and if you don't- look you know that man isn't supposed to be here" It was working and the guard who was shaking held out his gun as he undid the cell door. It was too easy and Zack made a note to see which guards were more susceptible to this line of persuasion. "Just lock me in the cell and get me out when you know Lydecker or your superiors are on the way"_

_Once inside the cell- Zack could tell Logan Cale was conscious. He was just that worn down. "Cale…" Zack hesitated. "Logan?"_

"_Right" Logan whispered- even though there was no one else here. "That's me so- this is…really happening- he just keeps asking where Max is…trying to make me lose sight of her"_

_Zack helped him sit up. "Did you tell him?"_

"_No- but it was harder …how do I keep going through that?" Logan rested his head in his hands. "I need you to help me forget her name… like you said if I can't remember it- Lydecker can't take her memory from me- I'll die before I give her up to him"_

* * *

Max watched Logan break and smiled. Even if he really hadn't been in Crash- he was here in this bar and he wasn't going anywhere. And he was definitely on the road to some kind of better. He had played two other people tonight and every time he hadn't played for money. It wasn't a guy thing because all the guys at Jam Pony and even the hardliner Zack played for cash. It was a Logan thing. And who said chivalry was dead?

He finally missed one and Max walked in setting up her pool cue and lined up her shot. "You know- Logan you'd be an idiot to blame yourself for anything that happened in there"

Logan watched her, his hands tight on the pool table and his cue stick. "What about what happened with Lempkin that night?"

Max righted up to stand up tall. "That was Lydecker- and you were trying to fight it- somewhere deep down and one day you'll be able to look him in the eye and say what the rest of us tell him" He frowned, confused and Max smirked. "Go to hell"

Logan still looked as if he were beating himself up over it but somewhere deep down Max knew he had heard her on this one.

Thinking about it, she supposed that was part of the reason why Eva never pulled the trigger. She could have, but everyone who had been at that horrific moment could have been able to tell she was unable to do it. And still Lydecker had pulled the trigger- for the defiance. Max would never buy that Lydecker had no choice. No matter how much it had 'pained' him.

* * *

452 had gone for a walk, and Logan was trying in vain to fall asleep. It wasn't nightmares that kept him awake it was Sage, and everything else. Eventually he got up and walked through to guest bedroom where Zack had been doing pushups. Logan didn't interrupt him and he waited until he was finished and standing up.

"I forgot her name on purpose"

Zack nodded. "You had no choice- it was the only way to keep you from cracking under Psy Ops- from turning. It worked- now you are going to have to remember it"

Logan had known- asking the question but to know that every time he had strained to remember 452's name… that he had known and it was because of himself that he had forgotten. That just because he had been unable to hear the name he screamed in Psy Ops didn't mean he didn't know it. It was just buried deep down. He just needed to remember how to hear it.

_**

* * *

**__**To Be Continued…**_

* * *

How many of you guessed – deep down that Logan had 'made' himself forget and how many people are surprised?

Thanks for reading, and please review! Reviews keep me going much like caffeine except without the bouncing off the ceiling part.

Chapter Complete 26/3/2010 or 3/26/2010


	15. Under the Complications

Disclaimer: Do not own Dark Angel- Apparently because everyone likes strawberry flavored lip balm and that's mass made and not cherry flavor- it was really hard to find a cherry flavored one. Which sucks- although the audio commentary for the pilot episode of Dark Angel did not. It actually proved to have a few introspectives that I liked. So we reach Chapter Fifteen. We are now well over the half way mark but we still have a ways to go.

**

* * *

**

Chapter Fifteen

**Under the Complications**

* * *

_**Fogle Towers, Seattle**_

* * *

It had started while Max was waking up- it had been one of those rare times she slept for at least four hours. Max could feel the jolts start down her body and she carefully got up. Logan was actually still asleep- she couldn't take time to think about how good it was he was starting to feel safe enough to sleep through little disturbances. Max took shaking steps into the bathroom. The small shelves built into the inside of the red paneling were small and it took several tries to get her hand to stay still long enough to get the container of pills.

Max opened the bottle with shaking hands and forced it to her mouth. A few of the tryptophan pills spilled out onto the ground. She slid onto the ground, seizing. She tried to control it- she couldn't go through a rough patch now. She had that whole tracking down the Steelhead's actual operations and not just what had turned out to be their front in the markets. But the stupid, messed up wires in her head weren't cooperating.

She hated being like this- on the ground- helpless. Max had to be stronger than this because it was the only way she could deal with it.

As the day began to break, Max felt the seizure wear off and she got to her feet. She could hear Logan starting to move. She turned on the shower quickly.

"I'll be awhile- might as well make one of those spur of the moment culinary miracles- you shouldn't have let me catch you the other day" Max stepped under the water. "Now you have no excuse but to feed me"

Logan smiled. "I'm doing the cable hack first"

"Like hell you are"

He could feel it… slipping away again. The words- 'yes I am' had been right on his lips but then so had 452 right after it. Ever since Cape Haven- Logan knew that it was up to him- that if he ever wanted to know her name again, he'd have to remember it. But every time- his own mind would fail him.

There was no point in over thinking it- Logan got dressed in his clothes from the previous night- he would just have to get changed after he got in the shower anyway. He walked from the bedroom and to the networked computers, and began to set up the camera feed. As he started to set up the connection, Logan placed the microphone earpiece in. He could do this.

"Live- it's not the best idea- you only started doing this again last week and then it was pre- recorded"

Logan turned slightly. "Thanks for your concern Zack, but I have it covered" He realized the light sarcasm in his words too late to take them back. But it felt familiar…

Logan focused back on the screen and punched up the connection- in three, two and one-

"Do not attempt to adjust your sets – this is an Eyes Only streaming freedom bulletin video. This cable hack will last exactly sixty seconds. It cannot be traced, it cannot be stopped and it is the only free voice left in this city"

It was like he had never stopped.

* * *

**Manticore satellite office, Seattle**

* * *

"…_**for the last few months- pharmaceutical grade drugs have been taken from hospitals and clinics and sold on the black market by street gangs- made possible by administrators of these institutions- looking the other way in order to get paid- while they ignore their duty of care to the patients they are sworn to heal. Here is the graphic evidence – and finally those responsible will be put on trial for their actions…"**_

It was not Max. Lydecker knew it- the moment he had watched the illicit hack. The voice and images may be identical but there was something- a way it was worded that made him know for sure. Logan Cale had reassumed his role as the 'free voice in the city'.

This opened up… possibilities. The kind that he could use. And Lydecker reached forward – across the glass table and slipped the video disk into a yellow manila envelope.

"Get this to the drop zone"

"Yes sir" Agent Finch said, quickly leaving the room. Most of the pictures taped to the wall of the office were updated now- others taken down. Only Ben's and Kavi's photos had been taken down due to recapture. The other missing picture was of Tinga. There were two that had been added to the collection, that of Jace and Logan.

Lydecker had the others to track- in fact a solid lead from Sacramento in California had just come in about a young woman working as a teacher's assistant in an elementary school whose partial description made it either X5 789 or X5 701. So it was Vada or Syl.

And unlike Max and Logan- neither one of them would stay put for long. That didn't mean he would neglect his pursuit of the latter pair. Going after them would take much greater preparation- and making sure all the exits were covered.

* * *

"Just get to where we agreed to when I located you there" Zack was already headed to leave by the time Logan had left the kitchen. 452 had been happy about the hack- not so much about the breakfast situation. So she had grounded him for the day- in what she called refreshing his mind for a vital skill sect- or keeping a female fed. Her words.

She had gone to go shadow the Steelheads so she could find their place- and finally bring them down. The Steelheads were not insulated by the police but they did know how to hide well enough that it didn't matter.

Logan waited until Zack had ended the call. "What's wrong?"

"One of the others just spotted surveillance and chances are Lydecker is on his way- I have to get down to Sacramento and help get them out of the city" Zack was halfway out the door when he paused for a second. "Don't let Max do anything stupid"

"I don't want to bring this up- but I was the one to meet with one of them… why aren't you warning me?"

Zack gave a small, thin smile. "Because you know better and you'll listen- she knows better and still chooses to take the reckless course of action"

Logan wanted to defend 452- but even he agreed with Zack on this one. As time went on, it had become effortless to agree with her over Zack about when it came down to Eyes Only- and something in the pursuit of justice, and fighting the power. But when it came to security- Logan was all too aware that Zack had always been right about the Seattle issue. Which was now starting to cause… problems.

* * *

Trailing the Steelheads was without a doubt, the most mind numbing experience Max could recall. At least it was better than last night. Logan had actually agreed with Zack about leaving Seattle- and Max knew she had kind of made it so he had to answer… but still- there was most times when Max just loved that before and after Manticore- Logan had never been one of those guys- the simple minded type that agreed with her on everything just to get to score. And then there were the times she wished he was a little bit more like that. But Logan wasn't and Zack was playing that home truth as far as he could take it. And to top it off, Max was feeling down in the gutter- but without the implant she could handle her seizures.

They seemed to be taking something from a van- metal containers and Max felt a smile emerge when she realized something was sloshing around in there. The organs and better yet it sounded like they were getting ready to head back to their crib.

And sure enough, Tuck was closing the back on the van and Max got up- she was going to give these idiots a good old fashioned smack down. Then she would take Mr. 'I chopped my own hand off to be Terminator' and make him drive her to the crib- with his friends in the back. She called Matt, he could call it in and the Steelhead organ thief problem would be a thing of the past.

Max walked around the post and walked up to them. "Hey- miss me?"

Bird pulled out a gun this time round, and Max zigzagged across the space between them so fast it seemed to make his head spin. She threw him at the closed back of the van. This time Tuck was harder. Over the course of the month or so since the last encounter- he had gotten an exo-harness attached to his non spiked left arm and that was what grabbed her by the throat. Max kicked him backwards, and stumbled back catching her breath.

And it wasn't the only thing going wrong this time round. As Max felt the seizures coming on- it also forced her to remember that even without the implant tripping her seizures up worse- she was still not on her game whenever she had them. Max threw up a leg to catch Tuck in the face- but her reaction had been slower and he caught it and she was the one eating asphalt and seizing.

Zack would never let her live it down but Max reached for her cell anyway, her common sense overriding her pride. Bird stood on it and her hand, breaking the phone.

"Oh yeah, we missed you" Eddy said. "Load her up fellas- looks like we are going to have some organs fresh from the source"

Sketchy had mumbled something about Steelhead turf and being too damn chicken to make the run. Original Cindy rode up through the market just in time to watch a group of Steelheads throw Max into the back of their truck. Cindy pulled back and watched as they went to leave. She had no idea what made them beat over her girl but Original Cindy knew better than to pull a heroine act that didn't go through.

Instead she followed them from behind- they didn't go far, not even leaving the sector… probably on account of what else they had illegal inside that van.

Original Cindy ended up following them to a refitted building that sat right on top of the property line between sectors.

Max needed help- and Original Cindy knew just where to find it.

* * *

Logan had heard Matt enter- but it was the fact that the former detective had spent the last five minutes in the main area- as if debating whether to come in or not- that made him get up and see what was going on.

"Where is-?"

Logan interrupted before he could hear his mind replace 452's name with her designation again. "She's running an errand" Or so she had told him. Logan just knew she had better just be tailing the Steelheads- after he had found a tryptophan capsule that she had missed on the bathroom tiles. He saw a large manila envelope that Matt was holding to his side, almost out of sight.

Logan recognized it.

"_Just came for you. It was left in the contact room"_

The envelope was from Colonel Lydecker- and Logan could tell that Matt knew that. He could read Matt's face well, and now remembered enough about him to know that this- a message from the Colonel had happened before.

"It's for me isn't it" Logan held his hand out and Matt hesitated until he caught sight of the look in Logan's eyes. He knew Logan Cale well enough to know that he didn't back down when he got like this. Matt handed it over.

Logan opened the envelope and pulled out the disk. A simple note had been stuck to the case. _X9 208- Congratulations._

With a sense of impending dread, Logan inserted the disk and sat down as it showed a single video file on the disk- and his system told him it was safe to open. He knew Matt Sung was in the room, that he had come in to support him. Logan didn't turn around as he hit play.

It was like Logan was looking at someone and that someone else was in that chair. Someone else was screaming… and begging Colonel Lydecker to stop.

"**Just tell me where she is son; and she can be here with you"**

_It's alright son, I understand" Logan had never felt more sickened in all of his life as when Colonel Lydecker patted him that once on the shoulder._

The Colonel had said that he understood, even though knowing full well within hours he would be betraying all of them.

Logan paused the video, and looked at Matt. With how he had been going- Matt had forgotten how much damage had been done to his friend's mind. And he could see it all in his eyes now- and he knew it was taking Logan everything not to scream right now. "How many times has Colonel Lydecker sent these?"

Matt answered but very reluctantly. "A few- while you were still a prisoner in Manticore- shortly after you got back, --- 452 burned every disc that sick monster ever sent her, they were tearing her up inside… you have to know that everything that happened to you- she felt like it was her fault"

"It wasn't 452's fault" Logan turned back to the screen, "Please leave… please just go Matt" It took a few moments but finally his friend left and Logan heard the door shut. Colonel Lydecker had used him against 452- used the tortures he put him through and then used that against her.

If 452 had been captured, trying to rescue him- it would have been his fault. Logan reached over to eject the disk and found that he couldn't bring himself to let it go.

Which Logan guessed, was the whole point of sending this. Even though Logan knew that, with no psychoactives or mind games affecting him that it was all a Psy Op- that he was letting it get to him.

Logan moved and hit enter to start the video over when there was a loud knocking at the door. He got up and walked towards it. He looked out and saw Original Cindy standing out in the hall, looking through the peephole at him with a no nonsense look in her eyes.

"You gonna let me in, or am I goin' to have to go ghetto on you?"

Taken aback, Logan opened the door and Original Cindy came barreling in. "Where's the rude and annoying one- Zack?" Original Cindy asked, looking around.

"He's not here" Logan frowned. "What's wrong?"

"Steelheads- I saw three of them grab our girl"

"They have 452?" It barely bothered Logan that Original Cindy was looking at him now with that mix of pity and understanding he hated so much- even though to her credit it was only for a few seconds. 452 was in trouble, and he had to save her. "Where did they take her?"

For a little while – Original Cindy had forgot what had happened to Logan exactly- but then it was what Max was so scared of and it was why Max had pushed her away. She supposed that '452' raff was that number that barcode stood for on the back of her home girl's neck and everything that came with it that Max hated so much. It must've been killing her to hear Logan use it. "To their crib- don't worry sugah, Original Cindy saw the place… all we need to do is get over there and save her ass"

Logan nodded after Cindy told him exactly where the 'crib' was. "I'll just check the satellite photos- see if there's a back way in"

Original Cindy had followed him in and Logan realized that the clip had been playing on repeat and he hit the stop key several times to make it end. It was bad enough being unable to stop himself watching it without anyone else involved.

"Damn, those black helicopter creeps really did you in"

"Can we focus on saving 452, please?" Logan drew up the imaging and took a careful look. "We can use the sewers to get right inside-… maybe you should stay here"

Cindy shook her head. "No way am I sidelining it when my girl's in trouble and that's final- don't make me kick your skinny white ass"

Logan dropped the issue, and pulled out the side draw- pulling out the hollow. He picked the gun out from inside, a nice nine millimeter piece. "I know it ain't any of my business and all" He looked up and Cindy continued. "But you shouldn't be watching horror flicks like that- it ain't going to make you any better, aiight?"

"I know- we should go"

"She did it too" Cindy leaned over and ejected the disk. She pulled it out from the now open disk tray and then snapped it in half. Logan didn't stop her. "Wait it was just as messed up then- so you hear Original Cindy on this one- Max loves you, and she didn't just save you for you to feel sorry for your sad self" She handed the stunned cyber journalist the broken disk and started for the door.

Logan felt himself stand, almost as if this were a dream and all in his head. "Max" Logan whispered and he could still hear 452- so loud in his head. But now… he could see her and hear her name- the whisper that was getting louder by the second.

Max. Her name… was Max. And Logan hurried after Original Cindy but not before grabbing something first. There was no way he had remembered her name just to let her be taken away from him now.

* * *

"Damn" Original Cindy said as she moved out of the way. Logan was giving it his all on those Steelheads- she was guessing all that time stuck in a wheelchair unable to defend Max's honor had built up to some wicked repressed rage. She looked down at the blue haired wuss one who had been knocked across the room and had stayed down.

"Where's Max?" He looked confused. "The girl you snatched- you better tell me where she is or I will get my friend Logan to go to town on you"

The Steelhead pointed a quivering finger to the door to his right. Original Cindy left the fool and didn't give a second thought to the Steelheads. They were getting whatever was coming to them...

Original Cindy walked into the room and almost immediately noticed the table with someone moving under the sheet. She yanked the sheet off and pulled out the gag. "What did you do to piss these Steelheads off?" she asked, as she undid the leather straps that were holding Max down.

"Interrupted their organ heist" Max sat up gingerly as a loud thump was heard from the ceiling. "Who did you get to come with you?"

"Logan- and your boy sure knows how to throw a party" Cindy crossed her arms and leaned against the table as Max got up, shaking slightly. "By the way- I'm done playing this whole 'it's too dangerous' dealio"

Max's lips set in that tight line they always did when she was going to stubborn. "No way- we've been over this- I won't let you"

Cindy put up a hand. "That's your misunderstanding right there Boo- it's not up to you if I wanna risk my life havin' your back- it's mine… just like it was Logan's. And no matter what you say, that is never going to change" Original Cindy nodded to her own words and squeezed Max's hand. "You, Max Guevera- are my sister, you are my family"

The argument died before Max could open her lips and she squeezed Original Cindy's hand back. Somehow, they were going to be okay. It had become silent up there and Logan walked in and Max frowned. "You didn't…?"

"You should come see," Logan helped her up after passing her the tryptophan and waited for her seizure to pass. Max worried sometimes that the scientists had messed something up along the line- that Logan could get seizures- or worse. But just for now it was good that they were both here and free, despite everything…

Original Cindy had gone up ahead and she had started to laugh up there. Max quickly went to join her and found the sight just as amusing as her best friend. There had been three coffins in the room- in what Max hoped was only decoration and not sleeping quarters. And all coffins were locked tight and various grunts and insults were muffled inside of them.

Max turned to Logan. "Nice"

"Matt's already on his way with the police- he called it in as concerned citizen…"

"Then we should get out of here" Max said and as she left she hit the lid of one of the coffins.

Original Cindy looked at him and Logan shook his head and mouthed 'wait' as they left the Steelheads to stew. She would have thought the first thing he would want was to tell Max he knew her name again. But then again Logan was into the whole 'gesture' thing. Some things never changed.

* * *

_**Space Needle, Seattle**_

* * *

"I thought I'd never get you back up here" Max smiled at Logan. The air up on the head of the Space Needle moved her hair slightly. It had been something Max had thought she would never have again. The lights from the city were as bright as they had been that night. This time the night sky was clear, and for Max- she wanted to take it as a sign that things were going to be okay from now on.

Logan smiled- and even without the glasses, Max could see parts of the old Logan Cale shining through. But she knew that he would never be the same as he once was… no matter what happened. "Me too"

Max sat down and Logan joined her. Together again. "That night after we tried to take Manticore down- I came out here… but I couldn't stand it, all I could think of was that you were going to die and there was nothing I could do. So I went back to your apartment, and I just lay down on the couch and I couldn't get up- it hurt too much, I didn't know how I was going keep going"

She stared out into the sky, to the few stars that were visible through the lights. "Krit and Syl bailed quickly they didn't know what to say- no one did. I just stayed that way. Then one day Bling got sick of it and picked me up and threw me clothed into the shower when I refused to fight back" Max laughed. "I was so mad at him- and he just told me to stop just moping and do something about it… I wasn't helping anyone by falling to pieces. Bling helped me deal- he didn't have to, but he did…" She fell silent.

Logan knew what his death meant to him now. That Bling had been the closest thing he had to brother back then. That Bling had always been there- and looked out for him, and then Max. And Alec had killed him for it. Logan wanted to hate Alec so much right at this moment. He wanted to hate the X5… but he couldn't. And Logan didn't know if it was Manticore or himself stopping him from hating Alec.

"Max" She looked at him suddenly and no words came out. "His death wasn't your fault"

Max felt tears slip down. "This is crazy- you remember me and I starting crying, when did I turn into such a sap?" He put his arm around her shoulders and Max finally let herself cry in his arms. Everything that she had gone through seemed to be coming out of her eyes and Logan was just holding her and making it okay. She didn't have to do this alone anymore- Logan was in 'her' corner. And Max just knew he wasn't going anywhere without her.

_**

* * *

**_

_**To Be Continued…**_

* * *

So it takes fifteen chapters to get Logan to remember her name but I hope it was worth the wait. It's not over… okay so I hoped you enjoyed the chapter and please review!

Chapter Completed 9/4/2010 or 4/9/2010


	16. It's in the Blood

Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Angel- FOX and James Cameron do- and when I was in high school I took Human Biology pretty much because Dark Angel got me interested into all that stuff and I was actually good at it without trying. I also spent my 21st birthday rambling at two in the morning about how much I missed this show. So writing the disclaimer every chapter really sucks because I love the show and I would treat it much better than FOX did if it were mine.

This contains AU references to 'Before the Dawn' because that book was really inconsistent, Seth's part is redone- and Vada's is completely AU as in still free due to that scene in the book being ridiculous- Lydecker wouldn't have gone after an X5 with three members of a TAC team and then the X5 not dodging the bullet. Stupid!

Sorry for the delay, I got a new computer and I was transferring files which always ends up taking longer than you mean it to. And I'm coming off a three day migraine which is as fun as it sounds.

* * *

**Chapter Sixteen**

**It's in the Blood**

* * *

_**March 2021**_

_**Seattle, Washington**_

* * *

"You come down here every day disrupting my workplace- I thought once you quit it would all be over but no-o, you have to keep making my life difficult"

Max turned around and smiled brightly at Normal. Her smile made the uptight Republican roll his eyes and walk back behind his counter.

It became easier to ignore the little things like Normal's daily diatribe over her visits to Jam Pony to catch up with Original Cindy and the gang. What made the broken world less dark and Seattle a not so horrible place to live in? It probably had a lot to do with what had happened just over a month ago when Logan had remembered her name. There was still a secret government agency on both their tails run by the Anti Christ known on Earth as Lydecker. But together- she didn't have to face it alone.

And with Logan's recovery- or at least Logan being himself again just with the city worth of baggage that came with the barcode, they were getting stronger every day. Max had been able to focus on repairing her friendship with Original Cindy. Her smile faded a little. That and a sound recording had come care of Eyes Only- Zack's phone conversation with Cindy from his second escape from Manticore. It didn't mention names or places but Max knew that Lydecker knew about her best friend. And that unlike Logan- if Lydecker came calling- then her 'sister' Cindy McEachin would end up dead.

Zack had not shown back up in Seattle, although he had called Logan once or twice. Max's smile almost died completely now. Normal reminded her that very soon- she wouldn't be showing up in Jam Pony again. It had taken a lot- but Max knew it was time to go. She had stayed too long in one place- and if it kept on like this she would get a lot of the people that made up her life in Seattle killed in Lydecker's attempt to bring her home.

Her brother was right. She was just as responsible for Logan now as she was for herself. It was one thing for Max to risk her own ass- time and time again. It was another when she was responsible for Logan and to a different but no less degree Original Cindy. Cindy was staying in Seattle- after she and Logan were gone Lydecker would have no reason to stay in the city. It was going to take several weeks for Logan to set up the relays so that they could keep sending the hacks through. With Asha and the S1W playing the muscle part of Eyes Only- and with the informant net – there was no reason Eyes Only had to vanish. It would just be called in.

"What's with the long face Boo?"

Max turned and smiled at Original Cindy as she came in, back from her run. "You know- the usual" Max started to play with her name tag on her old locker. The sticky adhesive she had ended up using was superglue and it cheered her up slightly to know how long Normal would be trying to remove it for. "Thanks for letting me crash last week"

Original Cindy leaned against her locker. "It's aiight Boo, though I would have thought with this heat thing and you and Logan bein' together- that it wouldn't matter if you jumped the boy"

"It's not how we want it to happen" It was taking time to get to that place- and Logan was being as girly as she was over it. And the idea of using Max's heat cycle to get over 'it', was repulsive to them both. Because it would be Manticore- and not them. "It has to be special and meaningful"

"Damn if you two aren't the slowest pair I've eva' seen in love" Cindy chuckled. "But then after everythin' it makes sense…enjoyin' your moment- some people could learn from you and Logan" She gave a pointed look to Sketchy who was on the phone, trying to explain to Natalie why things would be different this time as Normal yelled at him not use it for personal calls. Max laughed.

They still hadn't said it to each other- 'I love you'. Max had… and she knew somehow Logan felt the same way. But something was holding him back.

* * *

With everything that still had to be done- with Eyes Only, Logan had almost decided not to meet with the informant with the intel on the closure of Mercidyne Pharmaceuticals- it was probably just a footnote from the drug trafficking ring that he and Max had taken down over a month ago. But this was probably the last chance he would get to meet with an informant for a long time. And the last time as Logan Cale. Logan had spent most of the last decade being anything but proud over who his family was. His parents- who were still hazy in his mind were gone and what Logan had been left with was a place he didn't belong.

But Manticore's attempts and partial success to erase who he was had made Logan appreciate his whole family- even the bad parts of it. Being Logan Cale meant he existed outside of Manticore- that there was more to him than a series of numbers and being Eyes Only.

Logan looked at his watch, more out of habit than anything else. The small diner where he was waiting for the informant was nearly empty. An informant who wouldn't even give their name- the only reason this had gone ahead was because it had gone through Matt Sung who vouched for this person. But the name of the company was familiar- 'Mercidyne'?

The bell above the door jangled and Logan looked up. It couldn't be-

The girl who had just entered was only nineteen. Her dark hair was in long waves, curling here and there and it made her skin paler. Logan knew her name even as she reached out a hand in greeting. "Rachel Berrisford?"

Rachel dropped her hand and she started to back away. "This was a mistake" she murmured and turned to leave.

"Don't go" Logan said. "I know about A-… Simon…"

Rachel turned around. Logan could see that despite the nightmare her life had probably been over the last two years- that she could still hope. Rachel had this intense look to her eyes, like she wished, with everything on the table that this was not a trick. And then Rachel's hazel eyes became guarded. "How do I know you aren't… one of them?" It sounded silly coming from her.

Like it was all just make believe.

Logan smiled sardonically. "If I was- we wouldn't be having this conversation, Rachel please don't leave"

Rachel seemed to be weighing it all up in her head- her emotions showed on her face like an open book.

"I was in a coma for a few months" Rachel said, they were sitting in a booth and Logan was still wrapping his head around the fact that the girl who made Alec the way he was- was right in front of him- alive. "My dad pulled every string along the way…for awhile 'they' kept coming after us but then they just backed off- we thought we were safe. I found out about Simon… that he really had cared, a lot and that they were punishing him for it" Her eyes swelled with tears. "That they were punishing him because he fell in love with me- how twisted do you have to be to do that?"

Logan knew only too intimately what they did to any soldier daring to have anything like emotions. "That's Manticore"

Rachel nodded. "Then last July- they came after us, and they killed my father and ever since then they seem to be right behind me… like it isn't enough to take Simon and my dad away but they have to get me too?"

He remembered from the file- that Rachel had lost her mother when she was ten. She was very much alone in the world.

"You've done a good job- most people wouldn't survive for very long with Manticore assassins after them" In particular- people like Rachel who wore their hearts on their sleeve.

"What happened to you sounds worse than running from people who want you dead…" Rachel hesitated and smiled wistfully for a moment. "At least you and this Max get to be together- take it from me… there's nothing worse than being alone… I know what happens- that the Simon I knew…isn't there anymore…that he doesn't remember me"

That wasn't true. Logan knew Alec remembered Rachel- the unit all avoided her name…it had at a point gotten him demoted and in that fight, it had not just been him hitting with all he had. The mention of her name had brought so much pain, anger and regret to Alec in that fight- he thought he had killed her. And all this time Rachel Berrisford had been alive.

But could he- tell her that? With Bling's death- Logan hadn't been able to sort his feelings out over Alec. But he knew this wasn't about that. At the very least Rachel deserved to know that the man she knew still existed- and Alec deserved to know he hadn't killed the girl he had loved.

"He remembers you Rachel"

Rachel looked up and the hope in her eyes was scarily intense. "He does…I have to see him- I need to… please"

"Rachel" Logan was finding it hard to say what he had to her. It was one thing to let Alec know she was alive and a whole other to put Rachel in that kind of risk. It was only a small afterthought of the danger he himself would be in to arrange that kind of meeting. But she looked so lost, alone and all she was asking for was the chance to see Alec. "I can't promise anything"

"I understand- thank you" How was he going to explain this to Max? By not worrying her on something that might end up working out? Of course- Logan knew all too well how that had ended with Adrianna Vertes.

* * *

Standing by the Seattle waterfront, Alec wondered how much longer he would have to wait. It had been a simple task to be the one in communication- he had just been redeployed to Seattle to go after 452 again. And then a call came through who knew how many channels to the office. From Eyes Only- Logan.

Colonel Lydecker had granted the request for it to be him who spoke to Logan and without listening devices. But then the Colonel still believed that their time in Manticore in the same unit counted for something. Alec had worked hard as hell to keep Logan's choice off the report. It gave him a chance to reconsider- that recapture wouldn't mean an automatic six months in Psy Ops. But Alec doubted it was what this was about.

The phone rang and Alec picked it up as he swatted a mosquito. "You know – there are easier ways to get in touch- Eyes Only"

"Then Max would know I was talking with you"

"You remember her name- congratulations… I'd mean it but you know how I feel about 452"

"Alec…" There was a long pause. "I didn't mean what I said, I thought it was you confusing me but maybe it's them"

Alec knew that asking Logan just to come back was out of the question but this sounded like doubts- and he could play on those, do whatever it took to get Logan to come back in of his own volition. "Then we should meet up- I won't bring a TAC team… just me, and if you decide to still walk I'll let you- you pick the place"

"Outside the building with the burnt out apartment floor on Alexander Drive, tomorrow night" Logan said and hung up the phone. He knew the place- and it was a place that Manticore would never be able to figure out why he had chosen it. Where he had found his old friend Nathan Herrero, the one whose own daughter had sold him out for money and hatred. But the body had never been ID'd and the Seattle PD was not on the best of terms with Colonel… with 'Lydecker'.

With Max- her designation had faded to a whisper that sometimes got louder. But with 'Lydecker' it was harder. His own mind added Colonel. Sometimes- when Max wasn't around- he would pull up a picture of Colonel Lydecker… and try to say what he never could. And Logan was pessimistic about being able to beat this part of the reprogramming- of all the things he fought, there had been some he had just given in over because it was too hard to fight it all. A rank- had not seemed important at the time to fight. But it gave Colonel Lydecker a power over him and Logan was not looking forward to the results the next time they met.

Logan felt guilty over using the one thing that would get him that no strings attached meeting with Alec. Besides the fact he had no intention of returning to Manticore. Because even lying- using deception as a weapon- about the unit felt wrong. And that this flew in the face of Zack's orders- that Zack trusted that he would do the right thing. But there were special circumstances- Logan knew how much Alec had shielded even him from Command. That if he hadn't, Max wouldn't have been in time to save him. As much as everything with Bling and the manipulations made things complicated, Logan knew he owed Alec. Enough, to risk his freedom on the off chance that he could save Alec from himself.

So that Alec would stop being used by the people who condemned him to Psy Ops… and called his mission a failure because he couldn't kill Rachel. Because Alec was human with the right to decide his own future, his own life.

"This is a bad idea" Max said finally. She had been there the whole time- Logan had told her. They had argued about this and engaged in a war of the wills. There had been no real winner- Max knew that with or without her okay, Logan was going to do what he was going to do which was the reason for her silent participation. It didn't make her any happier about it. "Maybe once upon a time he really did love this girl… but how do you know he won't just report back to Lydecker about her?"

Logan shook his head. "I don't think Alec will- Rachel Berrisford was the only one who ever got him to question Manticore"

Max tipped her head back and groaned. "You should have just told her he couldn't remember- now if 494 still loves her and still chooses Manticore over… wait, she is still alive after having little help and having a bull's-eye on her butt for how long exactly?"

"Since July"

She frowned, pensive for a moment. "That's when Lydecker resumed his command over Manticore. Damn, this girl and her father had a chance under Renfro but the second he took over it was all over" Max crossed her arms. "I'm not okay with this Logan- but I know you, you had to help and I like that you are able to do that again despite everything… we'll play it your way, let's go"

Logan paused for a second and then followed her. "You're still mad at me aren't you?"

"You think?" Max snorted and then relaxed slightly. "No matter how this plays off I get to have one over on good old Captain Dick, and if he pull something… I almost hope he pulls something" They walked in awkward silence for a few moments. "Logan go home, I'll be there later"

She kissed him. It was something of a mystery to Logan, how a simple kiss- had never have felt anything like this with anyone else until Max.

Logan stared at her as she pulled away and walked off. A few minutes later he could hear her motorcycle. Last year- a disagreement like that would have resulted in her not talking to him for a few days. But they didn't let their lives get in the way anymore. They had wasted an entire year that way and they weren't doing that again.

But it was going to be a long walk home and Logan was beginning to understand why Max had taken them on her bike.

* * *

_**Furrow Air Base**_

* * *

As Max pulled up on her motorcycle, she could see the van and two S1W operatives sitting in the back playing cards. They were remarkably unaffected by what she had just asked them to do. The hanger door was open slightly and bright light poured from it. Asha Barlowe stepped out and walked towards her.

"Half of Seattle must hear you at night"

"Only that many" Max shrugged. "I must be losing my touch" She looked at Asha who looked… uncomfortable. Of course- even if everyone involved knew that Ian Finch was a bad guy who worked for Lydecker but still, generally the good guys didn't kidnap people with the intent of interrogating them.

And Max was counting on her pictures to make the agent talk. The last thing she wanted to do was to interrogate him in any way that made it Manticore. But if and when the pictures failed- Max needed her answers.

Max looked closer at Asha- she wasn't just uncomfortable. The leader of the S1W looked really worried about something. She was probably thinking about exactly what Max Guevera was. "Listen- you wait out here, I want to be able to turf this idiot on the road when we're done"

She left Asha outside and walked into the hanger. Finch was taped to the chair, a blindfold over his eyes. A video camera had been set up on a tripod- so that it focused solely on him.

Max walked over to him and pulled off the blindfold. "Sorry about the method I got you here with, but I have a time critical issue"

"…X5 452" It was little wonder why Agent Finch was scared of her. Last year Logan had been doing some digging into Manticore as part of their deal and found out Mr. Finch had been the one to spot her little brother Kavi- and then call in the TAC team.

Because of this fine Manticore agent- Kavi hadn't existed for over five years. It wasn't the first time she had completely missed saving a brother. Seth- the thirteenth escapee that no one had known about- had come to Seattle.

Ironically he had been trying to reach out to Eyes Only – do things to get himself noticed so that Logan could help him find her and the others. Only Logan had never gotten the chance to meet Seth. Seth had been impatient- and drawn Lydecker to the city. Max had just arrived in Seattle- and every time she remembered her few precious moments with Seth- it was marred by him letting go of the Space Needle. Death before recapture.

Max knew she was stalling- this was going to be hard enough even if Finch hadn't gotten her brother recaptured. Especially if this was what she suspected. Max made out like the silence was done on purpose. "That's not my name- now I'm sure you know all about how when X5s get cranky- so how about we do this again?"

"I'm Max and you are going to tell me why Rachel Berrisford is still alive"

Finch looked away. "I don't know what you're talking about" Come on- were these guys even trained or were they just exceptionally bad liars?

Max slipped a photo into her hands from a table and flashed it to him. Finch paled considerably. "You know, there used to be another agent of Lydecker's- his name was Sandoval… from what I heard Deck used Hal the hoverdrone to mow him down… what do you think he'll do to you for this?"

The picture was a nice ten by eight shot of Agent Finch at lunch with one of the South Africans.

"It's not… I just give them basic stats- nothing they can use"

"You and I both know Lydecker won't see it that way- but then again there is always Hunt Down and Retrieve… you could volunteer and give yourself a few more days"

Max shrugged her shoulders and began to walk away.

"Wait…" Max turned and Finch slumped his shoulders down in defeat. "If I tell you what I know…"

Max drew up a chair and leaned back casually. "Then it's just between us- now about Rachel…"

* * *

_**Alexander Drive, Seattle**_

* * *

Logan could see the explosion in his mind. He hadn't been here- but he knew that he was responsible for it. He stared at the burnt out window- where the apartment had used to be. It was the same place- but a different situation. And, yet it was in some ways almost the same all over again. "What took you?" he said turning around.

Stepping out from behind an old tree, Alec crossed the street and over to him. "Making sure I was alone- we never knew the Colonel had what he had planned- and I didn't want a repeat"

"I'm touched" Logan smiled slightly. "Really"

"So am I that you trusted me enough to want to come to me with this" Alec was completely serious and Logan winced slightly. The X5 frowned. "This isn't about coming back"

A car passed by and Logan's heart sped up in anticipation. That saying it this time would end well. "No, it's about Rachel"

The emotions drained from Alec's face and he punched Logan across the face so fast, that Logan didn't have the chance to counter it. He stumbled back and Alec grabbed Logan by his shirt.

"I'd let you go but I figure since you lied- I can break my word and bring you back…" Alec's face was cold- and it was as if only 494 was here now. "You shouldn't have trusted me, I don't need a TAC team to bring you home-"

"Simon!"

"_In case you hadn't noticed, I've been sort of throwing myself at you for the last few weeks…don't you like me?" _

"_Take them both out…"_ ---"_Sir, I can eliminate Berrisford without involving the daughter. It just seems to me the collateral damage is an unnecessary..." ---"You're not in charge of this mission, 494. Your job, and your only thought, is to follow our orders"_

"_I like you- I like you a lot"_

It felt as if the world had stopped turning for the longest moment. Alec turned around. He couldn't see 452- his objective for over the last year. Or that Logan was talking, saying something about it being real. All he could see was her. His Rachel.

She was the ghost that had haunted him for the last few years. The reason for his failure, that no one could tell that it was her death, and not Berrisford surviving that drove him.

Alec couldn't move as she got closer. Running to him, _not from him and taken away. The car going up with the charges he had set- Rachel thrown backwards and the flames blocked his view as he was dragged away. "RACHEL!"_

What if this was all a dream- some Psy Ops experiment. Command would know he still loved her- they would take her memory away too.

Rachel's arms wrapped around him, and her grip was as tight as his had been as she had torn away, and her heart necklace had been ripped from her neck. Alec looked down and could see the top of her head. Alec held her back and he could just barely see 452's face. Complete shock. But it didn't matter, 452 didn't matter- only Rachel did.

"You're alive" Alec said finally and Rachel nodded, refusing to let go.

"I didn't hate you Simon, I didn't"

They stayed that way for a long time, long enough for him to smell her hair. To feel her heart beating in her chest along with his own, a slower rhythm that made him feel like the pain had never happened.

452 cleared her throat. "I hate to break this touching moment but I need to borrow Cap- Alec for a second"

Rachel looked up at him with a trust that Alec felt undeserving of. He could never hurt her like he had again. "Your name is Alec- Alec... it sounds noble, I like it" It hurt too much to look away now.

"Alec" 452 looked uncomfortable and he guessed she had never really thought of him as a real person. "We'll be right back but I need to show you something without... her"

Alec looked at Logan. "There aren't words to say what I'm feeling- right now- please" The word sounded out of place in his mouth. "Please watch Rachel for me...knowing that if she's not here or something happens I will still take you back for good measure"

* * *

Max was still thrown as she went into the apartment building opposite the burnt out one. That sweet kid liked Alec and Alec looked like he would walk through fire for her. She hadn't expected it. They walked up the stairs in silence until they reached second floor "It's a safe house- this apartment"

She unlocked it and looked at Alec. "You really do love her"

"What I'm not supposed to- does that take away from your 'Captain Dick' as the villain in your fantasies 452"

Max just bit back the insult and smiled a brittle little smile. "Its Max- call me that and I'll stop calling you Captain Dick"

There was not much in the apartment, a small kitchenette- a bedroom- all the main area had was a table with a laptop sent on it. Max started to turn it on and load something as she looked at Alec. "So what happens now?"

Alec walked over to the window and was obviously looking out over to the street at Logan and Rachel. "45... I don't know" He couldn't take his eyes off of Rachel. "I can't leave her- but I can't abandon my unit... you know that- what Manticore would do to them..."

How could he choose between the unit that was in the place that had tried to take Rachel away from him- that wasn't their fault. Biggs, Cece, Gem... all of them needed him. But seeing Rachel again was like they had suddenly been doused in gray and Rachel was color.

"Manticore made that choice for you" Alec looked over at Max and she seemed to look genuinely sorry for him, for the first time since he had met her. "You need to see this... I had my suspicions when Logan said that Rachel had told him that Manticore had been after her for nearly a year but no kill"

**Finch kept looking at and then away from Max as if she would kill him. "Robert Berrisford made a deal with Director Renfro- he would back off Manticore and retire and they would spare him and his daughter"**

"**Something changed- and I'm guessing it was Lydecker"**

"**The Colonel was pleased with the results of the experiment with X9 208" at this Max's hand was at his throat.**

"**His name is Logan, you son of a-" Max brought herself back under control and removed her hand. "So Deck was happy he got his toy and it hadn't killed Logan in the process... what does it have to do with Rachel?"**

"**Only people with AB negative blood can be used- there's something in it's make up in these people that allows the retro engineering process"**

**Max stepped back crossing her arms. "So Rachel's AB negative"**

Alec felt unsteady. _She was a brilliant student, but Rachel often was distracted from her piano lesson and 494 often had to go along with whatever tangent she was on to bring her back to it._

"_She died on a transplant list" Rachel said, showing him the portrait. "Her heart was damaged in a car crash- and because she was AB negative like me it took too long to find a donor..."_

"_That must have been hard"_

_Rachel nodded, but smiled. "But she's still with me" she pointed to the centre of her chest where her own heart was. "Right here"_

"**The Colonel ordered the re-engagement of the kill order on Berrisford- with orders to bring his daughter back to Manticore- so she could be entered in the program"**

"Turn it off- Max, just stop it"

Max did it, and she looked at him. He could see something in her face- he had never been able to understand until right now. "I'm sorry" And Alec meant it.

"You know... I used to think I hated you because you were Manticore and that you killed the guy who made me keep fighting to save Logan" Max's words were soft but held a strong undercurrent of something close fury. "But the reason I really hated you was because every time we met you made damn sure I knew exactly how Logan was- that he adapted well to the training... that he was a good soldier"

"Max..."

"No- you listen... Logan was 'never' meant to be a soldier" Max had joined him at the window and he could see regret in her face as she stared down at Logan. "If I could trade my life and undo what happened- I would. But even if he was not meant to be- Logan had this will, he just refused to give in on some level... Rachel's a sweet girl, she wouldn't be able to... you know they'll do to her... what she would become, it will be far from what you see now"

Alec's hands shook with rage and he upended the table sending it crashing , the computer with it and then he rounded on Max. "That's not going to be Rachel... I won't let it happen to her- she's too good, too pure for that- I won't let Manticore near her... I will keep her safe, I will run as far as it takes to protect her- but only for Rachel..."

"It's funny- for someone who plays it so loyal to Manticore to be so scared of what they'll do to his girlfriend" Max said bluntly. "To be terrified of them destroying her- like they did to you... if you don't trust them with Rachel...maybe you don't belong there any more than she does"

* * *

_**To Be Continued...**_

* * *

So many fanfictions kill Rachel off- so let's see if we can avoid that. I always planned to have Alec escape- but I knew how loyal his character was and knew that only one person would ever get him to fight Manticore.

Please review and I'll see about getting the next chapter up and it is a real action-packed one.


	17. Freedom Is Never Free

Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Angel- FOX does and how much sense would it make if they were the public relations branch of Manticore?

As seen in the last chapter- the two current parings for this story are Max/Logan and Alec/Rachel Berrisford. And buckle up guys, because we are now in the final six chapters for this story. And this chapter, I promise will change things. Big time… okay enough hinting- let's open this mother up. And I got my cherry lip gloss!

* * *

**Chapter Seventeen**

**Freedom Is Never Free**

* * *

_**Seattle**_

* * *

It had never occurred to Logan that this could happen again. The main computer screen was on but Logan was having difficulty focusing in on it. That in the process of changing him, Manticore would gain more than just another soldier. That Lydecker would gain a way to do this to other people- through him. "This is happening because of me"

"It isn't your fault" Max said. "Lydecker would have done this eventually… the funny thing is the people- I just called the contact in Washington…" She leaned over and brought up a file on the dossier. "Special Agent Ames White, thirty five years old- years of loyal service to the NSA- blood type AB negative went missing three days ago –only he isn't being listed as missing, the NSA has been told to let this go from the highest level"

"It's not just people off the street"

Max nodded. "It's good people- cause apparently good old Lydecker can't settle for the dregs of society… he has to go for people like you, a girl who despite what's went down is too trusting and naïve for her own good and one of the last few good federal agents" She had drawn up a picture on file – one of those posed pictures of Agent White and his family. "And he had a wife and six year old kid. Wonder how Lydecker justifies this to be able to sleep at night… the wife doesn't even know why he's gone"

Logan knew the answer although he wished he didn't. "Because to him it's necessary and we both know Lydecker will do whatever it takes even if it means destroying a family in the process"

"Well he's not getting Rachel Berrisford- I can't get over how Alec is around her… it's so genuine and caring" Max smiled sadly. "It's almost like seeing Ben again- and then I remember that even though I did one of hardest things I've ever had to do… it didn't save him from Lydecker"

"You did everything you could have"

"Since when have either of us accepted that one?" Max was right. Logan couldn't help but think that if he hadn't been gone- Colonel Lydecker might not have gone after Ames White, and that this was because of him- no matter what the reason ended up being. He was the one who had trusted Dr. Vertes- without her research none of this would have happened. All because he couldn't accept being trapped in the chair and now innocent people were suffering because of it. "There are times I wish I'd let that bastard die at the genetics conference"

"But you didn't" Logan didn't blame her.

"It wasn't being high minded- it was because I'd be no better than he is and I'll die before I become one of them again… it's the line I can't cross"

It was just her luck that it involved sparing Donald Lydecker every time. Maybe next time she'd get lucky and Zack would do the job for her. She didn't want him to- she knew on some level it would get to him. But Max knew that there was no line Zack wouldn't cross to protect his family.

_**Safe House, Somewhere in Seattle**_

"Come on Alec; tell me what they're like"

There had been a time that Alec would have loved to tell Rachel about his unit. And it wasn't just the fact on some level he was betraying them for her that he held back. It was that all his mind could dwell on was that if he messed up on Rachel this time- that Manticore would destroy her. Alec had never been a fan of Renfro- and Agent Sandoval… Alec had wanted to kill him with his bare hands at the times he couldn't lie to himself about how he felt. But the Colonel was crossing a line and somehow was worse than them both combined. "Another time"

Rachel pouted slightly and then seemed to brighten up again- it was part of what made her so special- she didn't let the past drag her down. Very few people could let the past go- even if she should hate him for the deception that could have killed her and her father. But it seemed like that horrible moment- when he had told her the truth, when Rachel had hit him and ran from him frightened, had been the reason she didn't hate him.

"Fine- how did you pick the name Alec?" He had told her in private she could call him Simon if she needed to- but Rachel had just shook her head. To her- Alec was even better. It was really his name- and not a lie.

"Max gave it to me"

"That is so sweet- she must have been trying to get you to fight them"

Alec decided- if he could help it- he would never tell Rachel how that name had been picked. Let her have that part of her fantasy world where most people were all good somewhere deep down. "That's Max- she's just a giver" He reached into his pocket and pulled out the silver heart. "And this is yours"

Rachel cupped her hands as he returned the necklace. "You kept this- even though you thought I was dead…"

"It was all I had left of you…I know it was your mom's and while I never had one I know how much yours meant to you" That small object had almost been discovered dozens of times. It had always gone with him- and not even Biggs had known about it.

"I thought I was never going to see you again- I had to talk Logan into setting it up" Alec would have loved to have been there when Logan tried to say no to Rachel.

"I am sorry about what happened to your father"

Rachel wrapped her arms around herself. "He forgave you – you were the only reason we lived, because you couldn't go through with it… it just really hurts sometimes, why did they kill him and not me?"

Alec moved in and kissed her on the forehead. "I'm never going to let anything happen to you again- nothing but those pre pulse romance movies you love so much… don't tell Max or Logan but I like them"

"Really?" Rachel remembered sitting in her bedroom, distracting him from lessons. And the way his eyes would be glued to the screen, just like hers. The way he would move closer and always hold her tight during the sad parts. "You're sad aren't you- leaving your family…?"

He nodded. "I'm going to miss them- I know it's not exactly hallmark but it's my unit- I'm responsible for them and I just wish Biggs- would understand" Alec paused and then looked at Rachel. "You did that on purpose"

"Yes, because you feel strongly about it- can't you call him and get to have that…I mean even if you can't tell him the truth" Rachel had a way of being completely on the nose over things. She also seemed to miss the complications. Like that it would be dangerous- but then she had run straight in danger to save her father.

"He's in Manticore…it's not safe" Alec didn't want to make her sad – or know that what he was doing, his unit was going to hate him for it. That he had seen Biggs, as a report in. He had lied about Logan and then said he had accidentally found something. A report that said that Rachel was alive, that he didn't like what Manticore wanted to do with Rachel… and then Biggs had said it. That this was a good thing. And Alec had to face the truth because of all of this now. Before Rachel he was nothing but an obedient soldier- who refused to see that something was wrong with his life. And ever since the Berrisford assignment- he had changed. Because Alec had finally seen the truth about his life- it was all a lie. And Alec couldn't be 494 anymore… and hearing Biggs say that it would fix everything- as if he knew. Alec had no idea when Command had told his 2IC… but Biggs had known Rachel was alive. And he had been part of the effort of hunting her down.

And Alec in a moment of anger had asked him about it and had said he was done. Biggs had let him go and had just stood there… as if he was waiting for his brother to change his mind.

* * *

_**Manticore Offices, Seattle**_

* * *

"_I'm done with it all- if it makes me a traitor to protect Rachel from Manticore then so be it"_

Biggs had always thought that deep down- Alec had accepted that falling for his assignment had been a mistake. So when Colonel Lydecker had given him the assignment four months ago- Biggs had taken it to heart. No more would Alec brood over everything, if Rachel was in Manticore he would have to want to stay.

It had never entered his mind that Alec would betray their unit, everything for that girl if he found out she was alive. That Alec would be just like the 09'ners. Worse than them, because the betrayal wasn't even to help his unit. It was all for 'her'.

Alec was making him do this. Biggs had just told Colonel Lydecker everything that had happened.

"What do you believe happened 846?"

"That X9 208 found out about the Berrisford girl's survival and lured X5 494 in sir" Biggs felt his stomach turn. "Permission to lead a TAC team and retrieve X5 494 sir?"

"You don't agree with your commander's actions X5 846" The Colonel didn't seem at all surprised or if he was- it did not show, on Alec's actions.

"No sir, he's betraying Command… betraying his unit"

"Permission denied" Lydecker said calmly. "This is not just about his insubordination- we have a lead on a haunt of X5 452… and a soldier is on that detail- she will lead us to 494, 208 and the Berrisford girl- we will retrieve them all. You are to return to base soldier, in preparation for operation Eleven Nine Two- are we clear?"

"Yes sir"

* * *

_**Space Needle, Seattle**_

* * *

_When I set out to rescue Logan- I never thought my enemy would become a… well let's just say a guy I wouldn't drop an anvil on. I got to escape with my family- and Jace ran eleven years later knowing that out here was where we all were. Alec is running without that. A part of me knows that this kind of makes Alec family- that brash annoying cousin that no one can stand. But still…family._

_Logan started out jaded- in his own way. Rachel is just a kid who was in high school and thrown into this world all 'cause her dad tried to do the right thing and take Manticore down. Because for whatever twisted reason in Lydecker's head- he needs Rachel to control Alec. But why would this mean that much to him? Doesn't matter – after tonight he will never get his hands on her or Alec._

_Then why do I feel like something's wrong?_

* * *

The sun was beginning to set and Max walked back inside the interior of the Space Needle. It was special to her – not just as the High Place – but to be with Seth in a way. She didn't get to go to a funeral –or bury his body.

But up here she felt closer to him, as she did with the people down there. She started her walk down and when she reached the base Max looked up at the Space Needle.

Something lurked to the corner of her eyes and Max looked behind and stared at the bushes- in her eye's view she could see nothing but the shrub moving as a result of the wind. Great- she was as paranoid as Zack now. Max slipped back inside the Needle for a moment and pushed out her motorcycle and jumped on it as she got it down to the road. She shook off the feeling and drove out.

Behind the brush that sat on a rise, X5 453 stood, her dark brown eyes filled with hate at Max's retreating figure. "Initiating pursuit for the rogue X5 452, trailing from a safe distance" She pushed out a replica of Max's motorcycle and drove up to the road and followed her 'original'. 453 hated X5 452… to the Colonel- more than any clone she was nothing but a knock off- less valued by Command- sent to Psy Ops for what 452 did. If there was one thing 453 would do- is make sure for once 452 paid the price for her actions.

* * *

_**Three miles south of Seattle**_

* * *

The place was a strange place to have a shopping complex. It was in the middle of nowhere- several miles from Seattle where the dense undergrowth was just meters from the forested area that spanned along the road in vast distances and out past Manticore. Nature making it's come back. The mall had been under construction like many others when the Pulse had hit and was just abandoned. So places that would have once as the city expanded, became part of Seattle, simply lay unfinished hidden by the forest.

The only complete part of this place was the wide dark parking lot and it was illuminated by the light of the setting sun- shinning down on the beat up car.

Logan could hear if he tried the conversation fifty meters away that Alec and Rachel were having quietly. But he chose not to. Instead he stared at the dark green forest and Logan knew he wasn't past what had happened. Knowing every piece in his mind was one thing- but being able to move past what Manticore had done to him was another.

It was something Max refused to answer him on…saying he'd figure out that in his own time. He stared away from the forest's edge and looked at his car- it had been useful but it was just a car. His Aztec had been one thing- this car had gone through a lot- mainly with Eyes Only and with all the times it had been through gun fights and all- it was surprising it was in one piece.

Donating it to Alec and Rachel should have been easy but Logan felt an odd attachment to the car.

Logan knew this was hard for Alec- Alec usually acted as if it was always alright, but he had told him about his conversation with Biggs. It had to be killing him to know that very soon his entire unit, the soldiers under his command, his family could hate him.

From the road, Logan could hear Max's motorcycle and for a second after she had entered the parking lot and stopped- he had thought there had been an echo.

Logan and Alec walked up to Max, and Rachel stayed by the car fiddling with the Kevlar vest that she had been made to wear as a precaution. Manticore didn't want her dead- but no one was taking the chance in the scenario there was a problem.

"Cutting it close aren't you" Alec said and then shut up as Max fixed him with a withering stare.

Logan decided it would be best for the need to avoid bloodshed to interject "I have given them the papers- they're all set" The paperwork would get them across state and set up in a small town in the Midwest. All they would need for a new life.

"Logan" Alec held his hand out. "I know I screwed with your head in Manticore, and I didn't give you much of a reason to trust me out here, either but thanks for everything you have done"

He took the hand. "I couldn't trust X5 494- but I do trust you"

Max cleared her throat and looked between them. "You guys aren't going to hug or anything because that would be beyond even us weird" Logan moved back and she looked at Alec.

"I don't often get the chance for long goodbyes- and I'm not exactly sure how to do this but I'm gonna make it up as I go" Max crossed her arms. "Our history isn't so much mind games as a lot of past transgressions and the like… but the truth is Alec… you aren't so much of a dick sometimes… you can even be 'noble' " She nodded in Rachel's direction.

Alec grinned cockily. "Thanks Maxie, I love you too"

Max curled her lip. "I wouldn't go that far…-"

A hail of gun fire began to blow out the tires of Logan's old car and Rachel screamed as Alec practically flew towards her, to push her down. But it seemed the only target was the car and Max quickly grabbed her motorcycle and positioned it between an old pile of cinder bricks about the size of a shipping container and the half built shopping complex -out of range.

Logan stared up at the roof and he could see her. 453 noticed him watching and gave him a small salute as a wave and disappeared from sight. "Everyone okay?"

Rachel looked freaked out and Alec was helping her up cautiously after shielding her body with his. "I don't think we were the target- Logan did you see who was it?"

"It was 453" Logan ran to the car. Even if all the tires being shot to pieces wasn't bad enough, the engine now had enough bullet holes that it would never overheat again. Or even start up for that matter. "We might not have been the target but this car is all shot up- it's not going anywhere"

453 had also aimed for Max's bike but there had been enough of a delay for Max to have saved it. "What was her objective?"

"Strand us" Alec said, and he looked down as Rachel. "Any moment we are going to hear an entire Manticore task force coming down that highway- I'd say about five minutes…the question is how did 453 track us here?"

_Because of me._

Max felt like kicking herself or getting Alec to do it for her- he'd been good at getting the real bruises in the past. She had been using the Space Needle for how long- and with all Lydecker knew about it and her- it was a big surprise this hadn't happened before. She had wanted to clear her head, find a center and instead she had brought Manticore down on everyone. And now they were left with one motorcycle- and four people.

She noticed Alec staring intently at the bike. "Logan and Rachel will take it- we'll get out by foot"

"I'm not leaving you" Logan said. "And I doubt Rachel will just leave Alec here" Rachel nodded in agreement and was giving Alec quite the glare. As if he was insane to think about leaving on her again.

"Whatever we are going to do – we better do it now" Alec said, keeping his eyes on the building for any sign of 453.

Max looked at Logan and he nodded.

She groaned "We are both real dopes" She threw her keys at Alec's head. She crossed the space and leaned up whispering so quietly in his ear she knew no one but those present stood a chance of hearing. She told him how to get to Logan's apartment and to wait there. "…and if you scratch my baby I'll hunt you down myself" Max finished.

"What about you?"

"We run- out run Manticore, get a car and meet back up with you- now go before it's too late- there's a helmet in the seat compartment" Alec didn't look happy about Max doing this for him and leaving them. Logan knew it had more to do with not abandoning the people on the same team but he still got Rachel to put on the helmet.

As they pulled out 453 reappeared on the rooftop and she seemed to be setting up a scope- to shoot out the motorcycle no doubt at just the right moment to make sure no one left. Logan pulled out the concealed gun and let out three shots- ones that would miss but it would be enough to distract her. It worked, 453 ducked for cover and it gave Alec the chance to get the motorcycle onto the road and from zero to sixty miles in as many seconds.

Max looked at the gun in Logan's hand. He had used one before but now it was different- the way he held it. It had been with two hands, a cold concentration in his green eyes. He held it like a soldier did- with perfect aim.

But there was no time to worry about that now. "Come on" Max said quickly a hand on his arms to bring the gun down and Logan's face seemed to be filled with relief for a fleeting second.

And then they ran straight for the woods as they heard, further down south- the sound of approaching vehicles.

"She's not going to follow us is she?" It wasn't really a question.

"No" Max said as they entered the tree line. "Wait and report to whoever's in charge of this operation and then she'll chase us like a bloodhound" As they moved through the trees- slowed down by tight spots Max reexamined her conversation with Lydecker at the genetics conference. It all made sense now. Why he had gone on in particular about children who don't always act what was in their best interest or in 'it's always the highly intelligent ones who most lack discipline'. He didn't call a TAC team on her because it was premature- for all he had known one of the others could have been there- the conference had been meant to run well into the night… more than enough time after a few hours to call it in.

He had known. Max shook it off and took a look at Logan. Now he had that look as he moved a branch and she saw his face- and she recognized it from his fear at being in the wheelchair permanently- trapped. It was just fate's cruel joke that even out of the wheelchair Logan still could be trapped like that. Just in something that was far worse.

Max pressed on, and focused on getting out of this one- and this time with both of them getting to go home.

Logan found running through the brush, the act despite the fear of recapture not as hard to deal with as the Manticore treadmills with wires and equipment reminding him of his position in life. There was a way to get out of this one- and it was running to something.

Still, the literal danger was right behind. Even when he had been tricked by Biggs and Alec somehow Logan had known he'd make it out of that one. This was not just a set up, or an exercise to win or lose at. This was freedom, his life getting back to where it had been would mean nothing if they were caught. And when Logan thought of being out of touch with himself again- losing it all after coming so far back… he just couldn't bear to think about it.

Max stopped and Logan realized he'd been showing his worries and fears on his face. "We'll make it okay- we are getting out of here"

"I'm not sure you can this time. Staying out of Manticore means more than my life- Max if it comes down to it…"

She grabbed him by the arm. "Don't talk like that- you are not getting captured on account of me and you aren't dying on me period Logan- we are going to make it- talk like that again and TAC teams, Lydecker, evil twins- I don't care, I'll will hit until you make sense… now come on"

They pressed onwards.

* * *

Night was about to fall- and the Manticore operation was in full swing. Donald Lydecker stepped out of the hummer as Kalins fell into position. He didn't need to ask for the status- Kalins was one of the best and knew what he needed to hear. "Sir, we've begun to set the perimeter- X5 453 observed the Berrisford girl and 494 escaping on 452's transportation, when 453 attempted to stop them she was met with gunfire from X9 208"

"That perimeter, make it so airtight that not a leaf or insect leaves without our knowledge- and deploy the teams to the South…" Lydecker's hair looked lighter as the suns dying rays hit the parking lot. "Have the aerial pursuit deployed- infra red – our targets burn brighter than any animal or derelict out here, X5 453?"

"Already sent after them sir"

The clone was not meant to stop them- but slow them down.

Lydecker nodded slowly. "As you were" He looked at the damaged car and recognized it. Once from the photos of Zack rescuing Max from the South Market in Seattle and from Portland the getaway vehicle for them and Tinga. It was a valid assumption that this belonged to Logan Cale. He was glad that they had been able to spring the trap but also… disappointed. Max should have known better than to keep returning to the Space Needle- he had been there in pursuit before. And they ignored their own survival in favor of the X5 he had sent after her and a girl they couldn't have known about for long.

Why did they ignore their training to their own detriment? Lydecker turned away from the car without a second glance. A habit that would soon be corrected.

He would have liked to survey Max longer from the Space Needle to track her to the site of Eyes Only and other locations- but 494… Alec had rushed it up. Lydecker had not been fooled by his answers over his failure. He knew these kids better than they knew themselves and after Jace's defection- the lie had been obvious. Still Alec's actions had given this task a higher chance of success. And he would make lemonade from this disaster. Max was not going to walk away from him again.

The lack of traffic was bad sign- it meant that there were checkpoints- blocking cars from coming through. Max and Logan ran along the highway, keeping a close eye on the road ahead. Cars hadn't come through- but that didn't mean the military jeeps hadn't swung on through and with the squads of fully trained soldiers, guns and tazers to discourage carjacking them.

Logan took the road first, carefully as he crossed into the old abandoned gas station, and hid behind a gas pump when he got in there.

After a long moment- Max had knelt in next to him. "I know they counted on three players who could kick their ass- but this is too much even for them…"

"I know" Logan said frowning. "They would be leaving their Manticore base vulnerable to attack, none of this makes sense"

The only car in the lot- that was a shape- was an old pick up that was missing every part but its body. Profanity was spray painted across it, and Logan looked at Max. "I'm sorry about the gun- it just seemed like I had to carry it- for all kinds of reasons"

"You don't have to explain it- my problem with guns is my own…besides if you hadn't Alec and Rachel never would have made it out"

Logan gave a bare smile. "At least there's that" They walked into the convenience store attached to the abandoned gas station. All the shelves were for the most part empty- anything of use had been long ago stripped away. Max did find a small items bin, and smirked pulling out a miniature troll doll with pink hair.

Enjoy the little things.

He smiled back and then they both got down as a shape emerged from the forest across the road. 453.

Max took a look and got back down and turned to Logan mouthing something about the clone stealing her look. It was all genetics- 453 was wearing the standard issue Manticore special ops black uniform, and she had two guns holstered at either side of her belt.

The guns weren't Max and Logan could vividly remember the clone's attempt to pass off as Max. But the guns were a worry and Logan knew he could never shoot a bullet into someone who looked like Max.

"Do I have to pretend I didn't see you two hide?" Her voice was a lot closer than before and Max signaled to Logan to move behind the counter. The door jangled open, and 453 drew faster than the blink of an eye and her guns were aimed at Max. "Just give me a reason 452"

"Here I thought I had issues" Max quipped.

453's mouth was curved into a frown, and the look of hate and contempt was despite the fact they were identical- very different from Max's. It was flat, and with an utter lack of anything that even resembling humanity. "Cute 452- we'll get to see how much you joke in Psy Ops… you have no idea how long I've waited for this"

Her right arm arched out wide and she shot directly at the register. It didn't miss. "Up you get 208, next time remember that the reflection you cast on the window… it's nice to see you again"

Logan got up slowly, his arms still by his side. Hands empty. "I'm afraid I can't say the same"

"Logan" 453 drew his name out, "Where's that piece you were packing earlier… I want you to move…slowly out of there, that's it…" He moved and his coat brushed the side of the counter pushing the miniature troll container to the ground scattering them.

And 453 moved her eyes off Max for a second. That was all she needed.

Max sprung forward and grabbed onto 453's hand squeezing down hard and the guns slipped from her grip and fell to the floor. She then pushed her into the empty shelf and they both went to the ground. 453 sprung up using a shelf to jump onto her feet.

She leaped into the air and roundhouse kicked Max to the face sending her flying through the glass, shattering in. Logan picked up one of 453's guns as 453 dived through the broken window. He couldn't get off a clear shot without risking hitting Max, never mind her doppelganger.

453 had Max pinned to the ground and kept slamming her fists down into Max's face. Logan moved quietly out of the window and raised his leg to get her off Max, but 453 turned and smirked viciously as she twisted it and sent him to the ground.

Taking the reprieve, Max got up as 453 grabbed her and slammed her face first in the wall. Max curled up her fingers and fell backwards to force 453 back. 453 grabbed a shard of glass from the ground and stabbed down hard into Max's leg cutting down to the bone.

Max cried out in pain and Logan grabbed the broken remnants of a wooden bench and hit 453 across the back and she stumbled forward and then Max used her good leg to kick her in the head.

453 lay unconscious as Max slid to the ground and looked at the glass. She checked the blood. "No arteries or veins- pull it out"

"Are you sure?" Logan asked.

"Just do it" He pulled it out quickly and Max bit down hard enough on her lip to draw blood. Logan pulled off his coat and pulled out the tie to tie Max's leg off and put pressure down on the open wound. There was no lighter- or anything to help cauterize the wound.

Max reached up and Logan helped her stand, and her leg buckled slightly and she swore. "Logan, just leave me- I'll do nothing but slow you down"

Logan shook his head. "There's not a chance of that" God- he was as stubborn as she was. Max forced herself to put weight on the leg and with his help they moved out, back into the woods.

* * *

_**Fogle Towers, Seattle**_

* * *

Original Cindy refused to let Zack draw her into a staring contest- or his attempt to glare her into leaving. Max wasn't answering her cell or pages- so Cindy had dropped around here to find Zack, all black and tall streak of misery. He hadn't been able to reach Max or even Logan either.

"This is not good"

"Really- I wouldn't have guessed" Zack said harshly.

"Don't you even pull that attitude on Original Cindy because she ain't no pushover" Cindy crossed her arms. "Max an' Logan were meant to be back from seeing off pretty boy and his sugar- who is far too fine for him"

Zack looked at Original Cindy, looking a little less angry. She was a liability but right now she was information. "Pretty boy?"

Original Cindy nodded. "Alec… he switched sides 'cause they threatened this old flame of his who turned out wasn't stone cold dead. But Manticore being all player, player- wanted to use her like they did Logan"

Zack didn't buy it but he stayed silent. After almost half an hour the door handle moved, and Alec stepped in. The CO pinned Alec to the wall within a heartbeat and he barely noticed the frightened girl accompanying him.

"Where are they?"

Stepping up, Original Cindy put a hand on Zack's vice grip. "I know you're trippin' but give the boy a chance to speak…"

Zack backed off, pushing her hand away from him. He preferred interrogating 494 until he spilled out everything and then taking care of him. "You heard her, give me a reason not to kill you"

Alec held a hand to his throat, massaging the sore skin. "Hi to you too Zack"

There was still the possibility that this was just a ruse- but as much as Zack didn't want to trust Alec as the transgenic explained what happened- his story checked out. And the more he heard- the more frustrated Zack got. Why – of all the times for Lydecker to have obviously caught onto one of Max's habits, why mere weeks before she and Logan left Seattle permanently. He didn't believe in luck but Zack did believe in the act of stupidity. What possessed them to be so self sacrificing to throw their freedom away?

* * *

_**Six miles south of Seattle**_

* * *

He was wearing out. Max could see it in Logan's face as they rested on a log. He had carried her the last mile- and to keep up the speed would drain even them especially after that fight.

"This is all my fault- she followed me from the Space Needle…" Max felt like Zack for a moment- or at least she better understood trying to persuade someone into doing something they would never do… like leave them.

Logan could feel his legs burning for the last five minutes. In the chair – his legs had never hurt and he remembered for a long time- expecting them not to after exercise. And now Logan found he could bury the pain. Because of the training. "Max – it could have ended up being anything, it's not your fault. Besides they are yet to catch us"

Max laughed, and it sounded pained. "Yet- it's always yet… same with us- we kept waiting for some mythical dumb right time- we let Manticore hold us back again… I have to tell you something" Max looked at him. "Something I should have said a long time ago…"

"Max- that night we got away from Manticore- I was with it for some of it… I heard you say it" Logan moved her hair away from her eyes. "I feel the same way- whether we get out of here, no matter what happens, I love you Max"

"I love you too" They moved closer and then they both heard the aerial search- the helicopter moving closer to their position. Logan got back up and helped Max to her feet and they kept moving forward.

It had taken him so long to say it out loud. Logan knew why- it had been drilled into him time and time again that showing emotion was a weakness. That it was something he should reject. When he knew there was a time he would have been the first to say it. Maybe he could never be the Logan Cale he had once been, but he could be just himself. Taking each day as it came, and fighting the things that came his way.

The forest gave way to a clearing- a construction site. And right in the parking lot- were some old rusted cars- that had some form of shelter. Logan moved as fast as he could, trying not to let Max move too fast.

Of the five cars- only one seemed to be in some kind of working order- the little Miata. The other cars were electronic- circa 2009 and had clearly been wiped out by the Pulse. Max got into the driver's seat and reached down, yanking at the wires. "So did they get to teaching you this part?"

"Of all the crimes Manticore tried to prepare me for, theft wasn't one of them at the time" Logan said getting in, after siphoning what little fuel was in the other cars- it gave them a little over quarter of a tank.

Max started the car, and they switched places. "Now or never" she said and Logan moved the car forward. It was slow to start off with but it was moving them away from the search and onto a back road that swung back around towards Seattle.

They drove in silence and Logan felt himself let go of the breath he had been holding. They could say it without everything going to hell. The road stretched in front of them and in the distance Logan could see the pinpricks of light from the city of Seattle.

"If Alec hurt my motorcycle I'm going to have to kill him"

Logan grinned. "Don't you think you'll be off it for a few days?"

Max leaned back and groaned. "Damn my evil twin, but I kicked her ass… you would think that the real deal didn't matter anymore"

_It goes to show what a little teamwork can do- who knows how my clone became a twisted sister- and right now I couldn't care less. It was good having Logan on my side- and sometimes I can almost forget how that little thing is possible… but I never could. So we get to win this round and go home to what's still our home for just a little while longer- and try not to-_

Intense white light came across the road, and Logan put a hand up to shield his eyes. And then he saw the spikes that had been set up along the road. They ripped into the wheels and the car spun once and came to a stop.

The side window smashed in on Logan's side and the door was wrenched open as black gloved hands tore him out of the car.

"Logan!" Max yelled and opened her door only to feel sharp shocks come at her from all sides and she fell against the car and lay on the road. Under the car on the other side she could see the wires from tazers and Logan convulsing and laying still. "No!"

And from behind the lights, Lydecker's silhouette approached just as it had that night and he stepped out of the light. "It's over Max- it's time to come home"

"Never" Max spat, and she couldn't get up as her eyes closed and everything faded from the light to the darkness.

* * *

When Logan opened his eyes, he felt like he was in an awkward position and found he couldn't move. Everything he saw was bent, and twisted like he was looking at it through water and he could see the sky through a window. It took forever to turn his head and across he could see Max unconscious and a medic was sticking an IV into her arm- directly into an artery.

"Now the other one- there will be no repeats of the incident with 599" Lydecker's voice came in like it was time lagged, slow and deep.

Logan tried to move his hand to prevent the medic from sticking the IV in his arm but he couldn't move it.

All he could do was see the pale colored liquid move into his arm and Logan tried to keep his eyes open and awake. And the drugs dragged him under again.

* * *

After using Logan's computer system to access the satellite pictures- Zack had zoomed down in on Manticore. And what he found brought him out here.

Zack stared onto the compound, and there was nothing- no sound, no vehicles- it was silent and empty. There was nothing here that said anyone had ever used the place.

Alec was standing beside him, looking just as taken aback. His co operation had been surprisingly easy to come by but then Zack knew he was just looking for a way to help Max and Logan, for what they had done for him.

"What the-"

Suddenly explosions went off all at once- ripping through the buildings that made up Manticore. The explosions went off one after the other and without thinking Alec ran down the hill and into the building and Zack hesitated and then went in after him.

Alec ran down the hall, looking into the barracks. Even down into the basement. Not even the anomalies, transhumans or prisoners had been left behind. Manticore had been stripped clean.

"494… Alec there's no one here"

Zack didn't give Alec the chance to argue and began dragging him out. "They must have relocated…" It made sense- with the now two breaches of security and the chances of others- that they would have found a new Manticore base. One they could remake a security system for- designed to withstand anything without any hidden weaknesses.

The two ran outside the building, just as a secondary explosion began to trigger- and hid behind the hill. The entire facility was burning now- hollowing out and leaving no traces behind. After the fires were finished it would just be a burnt out shell. Nothing of Manticore- of the place it had been.

"Lydecker must have captured Max and Logan- chosen now to change house" Zack said and stared at the burning facility feeling a small measure of pleasure to watch it burn down. But that was nothing next to what it meant. They could be anywhere- Manticore could be anywhere in the country- hidden away.

Alec turned to Zack, the glow from the fire on his face. "We'll find it… I owe them, we can't just abandon them"

Zack didn't have the energy to something cold to Alec- about how in the past he had done everything to bring this moment forward.

"We have to- you really want to give Lydecker a chance at your girlfriend, where ever they are… we can't help them"

Alec just stared at him in disbelief. "You really are as heartless as Lydecker" Zack hit Alec in the stomach and Alec went down.

"Don't question how much I'd do for the others" Zack shook his head. "I'd give my life for them"

Only that wouldn't be enough. Max had made her own grave, and there was nothing Zack could do to save her or Logan this time.

* * *

_**To Be Continued…**_

* * *

This chapter was planned for a while but I was seriously tempted to just let Max and Logan get away- I mean who wants to make Deck, even temporarily happy? That and it's the only way to execute the biggest twist of the story that's coming up… and that's a good one that will make Lydecker very unhappy.

I hope you enjoyed this chapter ( or at least don't hate me), and please review! Only read the summary below if you are okay with a spoiler about said twist.

Summary/ Chapter 18 to the end of the fic:

"_Because what they don't tell you- is that you're more than just a soldier. You are a human being with free will"_

When Max and Logan are recaptured by Manticore, Alec is determined to save them and he gets help from an unlikely source. And in Manticore, as Unit Five is pushed to the breaking point by Lydecker and Command, they are forced to question everything they have ever believed… everything will all come down to a choice. Can history repeat itself?

If I just spoiled it I apologize.


	18. State Your Designation

Disclaimer: Do not own Dark Angel, FOX does, and we all suffer for that sad home truth. Thanks to everyone who reviewed- lollipops for all just not the creepy ones that Lydecker gives out cause that's how I think he poisoned Case.

* * *

**Chapter Eighteen**

**State Your Designation**

**

* * *

**

_**Fogle Towers, Seattle**_

* * *

With the friends he still had in the sector police- Matt Sung had been able to get the computer equipment from Logan's old apartment to the new place in mind without too much trouble. He was standing where the desk had once stood. A security measure that Logan had put in place- now Logan and Max would have no idea where Eyes Only was situated. Leaving them nothing to give up to Manticore.

He sighed and picked up the cardboard box full of discs. "This is the last of the hard copies"

Matt handed the box over to Alec. The former detective didn't know what to make of the transgenic that had showed up almost on schedule for all those months and had been assigned to track Max and Eyes Only down- and now Alec was helping them. He knew it had a lot to do with the young woman who was asleep on the couch- Matt was in two minds over it. The Berrisford case had been one he had been forced to drop as a detective- and being able to help her go into hiding made up for not being able to do anything then. Back then Manticore had swooped in and Matt had at the time no idea why a black op operation would want to kill a CEO and his comatose daughter.

But by putting her in touch with Logan had led to, well this.

There was a knock at the door, and Alec handed the box back. He approached the door quickly and yanked it open.

Asha Barlowe stared at Alec with apprehension. She knew exactly who he was- there had been that incident where a mole had infiltrated the S1W – Alec as it turned out to get a crack at Max. He had taken her gun like it was nothing- and Asha had found herself frozen.

"Asha- its okay… he's on our side"

"If you say so" Asha said, looking over Alec disinterested. He wasn't who she cared about. "Where's Max… or even Logan- she brought me into the secret now I need one of them to clear S1W's name with Eyes Only, the media is saying we torched a VA hospital…" She frowned as she noticed the computers were missing. "Anyone want to fill me in?"

She looked at Matt and Alec waiting.

Matt was the one to answer Asha. "That government agency that was after them finally succeeded… Manticore had them now"

"Oh god" Asha felt the pit form in her stomach and she tried to keep her face as clear as she could. "How did that go down?"

"They must have tracked one of them but we aren't really sure" Matt explained, and it was really close to the surface how defeated he felt at this moment- etching new lines into his face. "I don't know how we are going to get Eyes Only back on the air- do you know any cracker who would have a shot here?"

Asha bit her lip "I know this geek- calls himself Brain- I mean he's not exactly stupid, he could probably work the Eyes Only system…" Matt nodded and Asha walked out the way she came leaving the apartment.

Closing the door softly, Asha hit the button for the elevator. _Her own gun was pointed at her and she just stood there. If she took it back- he'd know who she was._

_Asha held her gun on Finch's back and squeezed the trigger as she looked away. She had known- the second Max had told her 'the plan' what she would have to do. It was the only way to keep her sister safe. But it didn't make it easier to do something that went against all the good fight stood for._

_The ice was weakening under her feet and she kept running until she heard the crack behind her. She turned around and ran for the hole in the ice and knelt down trying to find her sister. "Max!"_

Asha got into the elevator and as it moved down, she fought down the emotions that threatened to spill over. She had spent time in Seattle before Max- as the S1W, as the adopted daughter of a senator asking for Eyes Only to help her.

But when that mission to take down Manticore failed, it wasn't a question which city Asha would go to next. She owed Logan, and Max needed her. She had left her sister under the ice to save her own tail twelve years ago- and Asha promised herself she'd make up for it.

"Ace of a job, Jondy" Asha muttered to herself inside the empty elevator. "Real ace of a job"

* * *

_**Manticore**_

* * *

Logan woke up on the gurney- alone in the room. The cold, Manticore surgical room that he was inside of was part of their laboratories. But the room looked different than it had before. There was no one in the room, and he raised a hand to his face. Unrestrained as well. Logan sat up and went to move his legs off to the side to get down. He couldn't move them.

The disorientation hit him like a wave and he stared at the side of the door and his vision expanded on the small writing on the emergency eye rinse fastened to the wall. Logan's expression hardened and he could hold his body up on the gurney without much effort. But his feet couldn't feel the ground.

He couldn't feel or move his legs. His frustration at being back in Manticore, his fear of this place paled to being unable to walk. Being unable to walk out of this room- to find Max.

It made no sense and Logan tried to stand, and he fell on the floor. He clutched the gurney to get back up and the double doors opened as Lydecker entered followed by his guards.

"Your designation soldier"

Logan could feel a white, hot anger at the order. "No. My name is Logan Cale, I was born to Daniel and Loren Cale on November eleventh, nineteen eighty eight-"

The Colonel gestured to the guards. One of the guards kicked the gurney away, and Logan was on his back. It took a moment to sit up and Logan looked away from Lydecker. He had to- it was too hard to match his gaze like this.

"The chemical that was injected into your spine- is blocking the nerve impulses" Lydecker looked down and noticed how the younger man's face had gone pale and he seemed to be much more afraid of his non functional legs than of him. "It's temporary…but it can be re administered every twelve hours-"

Despite the fact Logan could not stand- it didn't make him harmless especially when he realized what Colonel Lydecker was really saying. He grabbed onto the leg of the guard and pulled him down- using the man to move himself into a position to throw himself at Lydecker and cause damage. The other two guards reacted, pulling Logan off the soldier before he could move and grabbed him into an upright position his legs bent, useless to hold himself up.

The tech that was behind him, who had been lurking in a corner pushed something underneath him and Logan knew what it was.

Lydecker looked unaffected by the attempt. "I know how you feel about being in that chair- I think I've made my point soldier…I gave you back your life and I can take it away from you an instant… now, state your designation"

What was important here was that he didn't give in. Not for a moment's peace, not for anything. If he started compromising again now- he'd just be back where he started. Losing his sense of self piece by piece until he couldn't remember who he or Max were. Not even to get out of this wheelchair even though it was killing Logan inside to be back in it. The soldier inside him was not a whisper- it was screaming at him just to give in. Just to stop feeling incomplete and to not be trapped inside this chair.

"No"

Colonel Lydecker looked at the tech. "Have him put in a cell in isolation and keep administrating the paralyzing agent every twelve hours- have me informed the moment 208 reconsiders his defiance"

The order forced Logan to look down at his legs as he heard the Colonel leave. And he wished it was just the soldier who had wanted give in to the command. Just to get to keep walking.

Lydecker had suspected Max would have been able to bring more of the original Logan Cale out- it had never seemed to be erased just hidden. And Lydecker knew Logan would eventually give in and say the designation even if he didn't want to believe it. It was more about the act of forcing him to acknowledge the numbers as himself. Lydecker was going to use one of Logan's greatest weaknesses- to reverse the progress that Max and Zack had made with him.

This new facility was a single, large building complex that was in an isolated area near the mountain ranges. His kids weren't going to be finding this place- easily and even if they could- it would be a one way trip in if they did try something.

Entering the infirmary, Lydecker finally came to the solitary room- that had been designed specifically with the runaway X5s in mind. He took off his glasses and slipped them into his pocket- and leaned in to allow his retina to be scanned. The locks released.

"Damn, are you here to gloat?" Max found it simpler to cope if she made fun at this whole thing- even though inside she had never felt worse. It was one thing to be frightened for someone that was trapped in Manticore- but it was harder to be that person. And here she was proving every prediction that Zack had ever made. "'Cause you are supposed to do that whole evil laugh thing…"

Lydecker drew up a chair and Max didn't bother to hide her revulsion. "Max, this really is for the best"

Max rolled her eyes. "Do me one favor- don't even try to justify it- it's like hearing some big dumb child that doesn't know the difference between right and wrong- only you aren't a kid… and the thing is you can but you are so obsessed with your grand vision that you don't even care what an unrelenting bastard you are"

Lydecker looked thoughtful. "Tell me Max, for all you have done in the last twelve years, what have you accomplished in the way of the normal life you escaped for…do you really think you have gained anything?"

She wanted to say Logan, so badly but Max knew he would just throw it back in her face. So she ignored him and lashed out on her own. "And since your wife died- I wonder how disgusted she would be her husband turned out to be nothing but a monster… you see I don't buy the 'you were once a good person'… I think you were always like this- you just hid it"

And the point landed home and she could see the tightening of Lydecker's jaw as he tried to compose himself.

"I'm not even trying" Max added, "Because I know exactly how this is going to go down- I heal- you drag my ass down to Psy Ops…and you try to bring out 452- so let's cut the crap, your mind games don't work on me"

"But it will" Lydecker inclined his head, staring straight at her. "The truth is Max you are going to Psy Ops- the next year will be nothing else for you. So if you need to make smart remarks and lash out, do so- it's just one more thing presented that Psychological Operations will need to fix"

He started to leave and Max moved her head and body up as much as she could. "Just call my evil twin Max then- and put a bullet in me like you did to Eva, because you do this I might as well be dead!"

Lydecker stopped and Max knew he was trying hard not to look at her. "You brought this on yourself 452"

Max glared into his back. "Whatever you need to tell yourself to sleep at night"

Lydecker left and she slumped backwards. It had slowed her down but Max was grateful to 453 for stabbing her- and the movement afterwards had caused quite the bit of damage. It meant Lydecker had to wait a week or so to get to play with her head- and Max didn't know how she was going to handle this one. Logan had been a wreck when he had come home after months of Psy Ops reprogramming on and off, and even Zack seemed to have to deal with the aftermath of it.

Reprogramming- like she was some kind of hard drive that didn't work properly. It was bent- and to top it all off she kept waking up from all the drugs they gave her, with Lydecker hovering nearby. Max closed her eyes after she caught a young X6 peering in- deciding faking sleep was best.

* * *

"This is all wrong" Kiron said to Cece, the water hitting his back as Unit Five- or what wasn't rotating for a day's worth of evaluation from Psy Ops returned from the yard and hit the showers.

Cece turned around, her blonde hair still dripping as her shower turned off. "All of its wrong I mean Alec wouldn't have just taken off- but Command isn't saying anything" She tied her blonde hair back up quickly. If it were her choice- it all be off but Command preferred her hair longer for missions. "Biggs isn't either and he was there… and for some reason he's not looking any of us in the eyes"

"It could just be he has not had a cigarette for the last few days" Gem said as she took Cece's place. "I always knew that addiction of his would get him in trouble- at least he wasn't the one who got caught" The usual guard who traded the cigarettes and cigars had been caught passing cigars onto Vic. He was in isolation but then his evaluation session had no red flags. Otherwise Vic would be in Psy Ops now instead.

The blonde X5 smiled briefly, but she couldn't get these questions out of her head.

There was somebody who knew the answers- only it would be really hard to reach them. Logan was in isolation like Vic but for a much bigger reason than possession of contraband.

Logan may have been the one in isolation- only the unit was under strict observation at this current time due to Alec's actions. And this base was unfamiliar- the guards schedules had all changed around on them.

Cece got dressed and made up her mind. After lights out would be the best chance that she would get.

* * *

The beds were not bunks but more like the arrangement in Gillette- two rows of metal beds. But there were no windows, not even barred ones. Cece had chosen the one closest to the air duct- she had looked at the schematics and knew that in two days the fans would be turned on- but until then the air ducts made for great passages all over Manticore.

She waited until everyone else was sleeping and removed a small screwdriver from down her top, and unscrewed the vent quietly.

Cece moved the grate carefully and she saw Jesse was awake the white of her eyes making her skin look darker with the lights off. Jesse came over and tapped a signal and Cece held her hand briefly. And crawled in and out of sight.

Jesse quickly reattached the grate and moved the pillows on her unit sister's bed so that it looked like she was still in there. She quickly got back into bed as the guards passed in the hall and she kept her eyes open waiting for Cece to return.

Crawling through the passage was difficult – the males in the unit could never manage this. Cece got to the end of the wall, and partially slid down with the air duct. It was going to be just peachy getting back up there.

The isolation cell area was part of the facility that had been built into the rock wall and Cece was very aware now that if she was caught- she wasn't very far away from Psy Ops. She moved down into a supply room and kicked the grate out. Cece pulled herself out and brushed off.

Cece stared into the cell passageway and smiled. Good old Terrence- he was one of the few decent guards.

She entered the passageway. "Hi"

"What are you doing- they have cracking down on us here, you'll get us both in trouble"

"I need to see Logan, you let Zack do it all the time" Cece said, her tone low. "So I need to get in there, I'm not out to get him for anything…promise"

Terrence moved to the cell door on the far right and undid it. "Twenty minutes tops"

Cece nodded and stared into the cell before she opened it. Logan was facing the wall in a wheelchair and she stepped in. "You look uninjured"

He turned around and Cece was surprised by how guarded he was. "The Colonel decided if I wasn't going to play along I don't get to walk"

Cece had known that Logan had once upon a time needed a wheelchair for a damaged spinal cord- and she had gotten to know him over those months well enough to know that he had to hate this. She didn't know exactly know why or pretended to get why- but if this was what Colonel Lydecker was doing to get Logan to accept Manticore- then it was a pretty extreme step.

"I feel for you, I really do but I need to know why our CO- turned traitor"

Logan gave a wry smile. "I don't know who your CO is, but Zack turned against this place a long time ago… I know who you mean- I'm just not sure you want to hear it… Biggs didn't"

Cece sat on the rack and noticed that Logan wasn't even trying to sleep. And that worked out so well for him last time. "Well I do Logan- I'm not here to trick you… I just want to know why this is all happening"

"Did you know that Rachel Berrisford's alive- well she is, she also is AB negative like I used to be and that this place is trying to find her, bring her in" Logan noticed how Cece didn't interrupt- and knew that she had until now- had no idea about this. He softened his voice a little. "When I found out- I called Alec… I thought that if he could see her alive that at the very least he wouldn't blame himself for her death anymore"

Standing, Cece stared at the cell door and then looked back at Logan. "She was the one person… after that mission it was like something was not in him anymore- like despite whatever he said, he didn't feel part of Manticore anymore…only part of our unit… how does Biggs enter this mess?"

Logan looked hesitant and Cece sat back down. "Tell me"

"Biggs knew Rachel was alive- Alec didn't know for how long but he was trying to bring her in… so that Manticore and the good Colonel could do to her what they did to me… and he told Alec that this was a good thing"

"And then he told on him" Cece felt her grip on her anger get weaker. "Biggs told Colonel Lydecker that Alec was going to go rogue…we are this close from all getting thrown in Psy Ops for a mandatory six months… all because Biggs did this-what were you going to do before this got exposed?" she asked, almost accusing.

Logan paused for a moment. "I would have made it so it looked like the Chinese or the South Africans had gotten to him… Alec didn't have a choice, Cece- he didn't want to be a traitor or leave his unit behind-"

Cece stood to leave. "I got it Logan, I understand" She leaned down and put her hands on Logan's shoulder's. "I don't blame you- but please Logan… you need to play along, if only so if your girlfriend gets the chance you two can get out of here" She smiled and left the cell quickly, not saying a word to the guard.

She had to get out of there- before she could admit to Logan that she understood the 'why' behind running away. That she was beginning to question Command. The more she thought about it – they weren't like the other units… most in the wake of 09 had become mere soldier's in cooperation. Even in the units that held onto that sense of family- it only stretched so far… no names and ready to turn on each other at the hint of disobeying orders. They all over the course of years had picked names. And that 452- Max's return to Manticore was the only thing saving her unit from reprogramming.

* * *

Biggs could feel the eyes of his entire unit on him- saying sorry just was not cutting it. He regretted what he had done so much. It didn't cut it with Cece or Skittles at all- and Skittles consistently rubbed their sister the wrong way- mainly out his constant need to pull pranks with her as the punch line. He was the youngest member of the unit at sixteen years.

Gem had been sympathetic for once- had understood why he had messed up but had pointed out that he should have helped get the girl into hiding- so that Alec knew he could still trust them. They could forgive him, even Cece would eventually forgive him. But they would never forget that it was him who had alienated Alec- and destroyed his trust in his own family.

They were lined up for inspection and to what was the unit's collective surprise, Colonel Lydecker himself was leading it.

At the end of his inspection – everyone waited for him to put them out of the attention position and into at ease.

Instead Colonel Lydecker moved backwards and forwards as he addressed them. "It has been brought to the attention of Command the use, by this unit of non-issue designations… this will come to halt immediately. If anyone from this unit uses a non-issue designation they will spend a week in Psychological Operations… there will be no more contraband, or any other deviations from your operating orders- is this understood?"

"Yes sir!"

"Your commanding officer betrayed you all- he has abandoned the mission, do you condone his actions?"

"No sir!"

"Dismissed" Colonel Lydecker and the sergeants left the barrack and as Unit Five looked at each other- the last time they had lied to a commanding officer was Director Renfro.

Cece waited until there was no signs of the guards, or the Colonel to talk to everyone. They had five minutes before training- and she was going to use it. "Some of us have made mistakes- big ones" she looked at Biggs for a long moment. "But that – not an issue now… what is, is sticking together. So that means no tattling- nothing that could get us on the radar, names only when you are sure you can't get overheard- I know we hate to be like the 09'niners, we have loyalty… but we are a family just like them…what Alec did doesn't change it"

As everyone left for training, Biggs hanged back and he looked at Cece. "Thanks"

"Don't… okay- that was to keep their spirits up… but I can't undo what you did because they are going to send us for reprogramming in a week or three months"

Biggs followed her out as he thought about why he had reported Alec, and he knew why. He was afraid he would lose his brother forever out there. But if he had been captured- he would have lost Alec anyway. He had made a huge mistake and now his unit might end up paying the price.

* * *

_**To Be Continued…**_

* * *

I almost lost momentum but I got it back- yea! Okay so now after this- there are only four chapters left of this fic… so let's keep heading towards that. Oh, and please review. Thanks!


	19. A Reason To Fight

Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel. And I got to ride a motorcycle the other day and the guys driving it did some really cool twists and turns just like Max- well not the really dangerous ones and I was wearing a helmet. So, fourth last and somehow I feel like I'm going to miss this story even though at times I wanted to scream because of it.

Details on Asha's back story are slightly AU- but are from the Eyes Only dossier by D.A. Stern. Sorry for the delay, colds are a real pain in the butt.

* * *

**Chapter Nineteen**

**A Reason To Fight**

* * *

_**542 McCallister, Sector Six**_

* * *

"Not a word"

Alec didn't need to be told to act civil- even if Brain was a funny sight and that wasn't even commenting on his size. Brain kept rattling off various probabilities connected with everything- he was 'different'.

Brain set himself down and began to load up the programs needed. Matt Sung was the one who would actually give the hack- the speaking part… what made the four people in the room nervous was the actual broadcast.

"Not to irritate you or anything" Alec commented to Asha, who was going over the script for last time. "But the sector police- aren't who we have to worry about, when Manticore sees this they are going to attempt to trace it and they are a whole lot better at it"

She handed the script to Matt, and turned to Alec. "I know, that's why you are going to use that fast mind of yours and pitch in" Asha checked the time on her watch. "If we don't do this now- they are going to assume Eyes Only is sunk and they just insert their own… it's time"

The more time Alec spent around Asha- the more something just didn't add up about the blonde. He had figured that she was just some action figure freedom fighter when they had first met. But she seemed to have taken in a lot of what Max had told her about Manticore and their procedures. Too easily.

Brain started to link up with the satellite and Matt put the headset on.

"You okay man?" Alec asked.

"Yeah, considering I have to deliver this to millions of people… I have to be…"

* * *

_**Manticore**_

* * *

…**this has been a streaming freedom bulletin video- via the Eyes Only Informant net peace out"**

Donald Lydecker gripped the back of the leading computer technician's chair tightly. Once again they had failed to trace the broadcast… it was as if no matter what they did- the Eyes Only network would survive- and be just out of their reach. But Lydecker didn't accept that.

"Is there anything you can give me to use from this failure?"

"Sir- for a moment we did begin to back trace their signal…but without intimate knowledge on how this system works we are blind"

Lydecker rotated the metal stress balls around in his hand once. The last time he had tried to force Logan Cale to give up Eyes Only it had failed. But last time he hadn't had Max. She was proving resilient to the attempts to retrieve the secrets she guarded- perhaps even more so than Zack's ability to fight the reprogramming.

But she would eventually give into it, given enough time and it was time to use that fact to full effect.

The days bled into each other- and Logan knew he had been here for two and half weeks. He was forced to go to training for several hours each day- in which he was allowed to actually feel his legs move- and then they were taken away from him when he was returned to his cell. Each day the Colonel came in, asking for his designation- and Logan ignored him completely after the first few times.

Logan had gotten a piece of chalk and made small white lines on the wall space between the bricks and his rack. Almost too small to see – each one standing for a day- there were currently eighteen little white marks.

He didn't want to lose track of time again. Every moment alone, Logan couldn't stop thinking about Max knowing she was somewhere in here. That the last few months had not just been a fantasy in his mind- that went wrong.

He could hear someone approaching from the end of the cell corridor and Logan forced the wheelchair around to face the wall.

The door opened behind him and Logan didn't bother to hide the amusement as the guards tried to force the chair back around.

"Do you want to see Max?"

It was a trick question and Logan knew it. Nothing was given away in Lydecker's face but Logan knew enough about this to know that if he did get to see her it would probably be in Psy Ops- a way for the Colonel to get to him using Max for something.

Logan forced himself, to not let his emotions control him "What do you want?"

To his credit, Colonel Lydecker did not try to act as if he had no idea what Logan was talking about and it was the closest the two had come to being on the same page in a long time. "What I've always wanted- Eyes Only…"

"You know I have to tell you no" Logan said, without any regret in his voice. "So what is it going to be this time- I see Max in Psy Ops, you throw me in there… maybe you would like to take away my ability to move altogether" He couldn't stop his voice from shaking with a quiet anger.

Lydecker signaled to the guards to step back and he moved closer to Logan. "As things stand, you will not be seeing her for a long time X9 208- until she's been fully reindoctrinated. Then I will be able to send you out on any mission I deem required- and you'll come back every time because she will in here… I don't have to destroy who you are because I have her"

He turned his back on Logan seemingly looking at the cell as he spoke. "Your allies on the outside had re-established Eyes Only- and you will track them down"

Logan looked at his back, wondering if he could- if he would kill Colonel Lydecker where he stood. "And in return you leave Max alone"

"She's not on the table 208"

"That's the only way I'll help you- take her out of Psy Ops… she's the only reason I would do what you want…" Logan knew, for some reason he knew Lydecker would use it. "And you know it" He used desperation, his very real need to do anything for Max – to convince the Colonel he was being sincere. For once being the one manipulating- instead of just the victim.

Logan had no intention of giving up the informant net, giving Eyes Only to Manticore. But he had to play along- if only to get a shot at stopping them. Manticore would eventually find a way to track Eyes Only – developing a new computer system to deliver the hacks would take too long and using somebody else's system always resulted in a mistake down the line.

Max was the only person he had ever explained the actual computer system to apart from Bling- because she was the only other person he trusted in his life who could understand it.

_Come on Colonel- use my weakness for her- get what you want._

Lydecker regarded him, and Logan had to remind himself that the Colonel could not tell what he was thinking by just looking at him. That he wouldn't just call the ruse. "What's your designation soldier?"

Logan Cale was smiling on the inside. On the outside, all Lydecker could see was the damaged man in a wheelchair willing to do anything to save Max.

"X9 208, sir" This was different- this time Logan was going to use the soldier to get what he needed.

* * *

_**Seattle**_

* * *

Sitting at the bar, Original Cindy drank alone. She had a girlfriend at home waiting for her but then this was not about going out for the night. When Max had stopped pushing her away, she had made her promise that if anything happened to her- Logan and Zack were the only two people from the crazy part of her life that she wanted Cindy involved with.

Someone sat silently besides her. "You gonna speak or are you going to play it all dark and mysterious…"

Zack was not even trying to blend in. For a start everyone in here had just gotten off work and were drinking their hearts out, trying to remove the memory of another day at their dead end jobs. Or relaxing.

"Cindy I did not come here for fun" Zack turned slightly to look at her. "So it's that ex cop and Alec behind it using some computer geek?" He didn't look happy but then apart from the stint as Normal's golden boy- Original Cindy couldn't remember seeing him look very happy for real.

"The S1W peeps are givin' him on loan… apparently he checks out and whatnot- you shouldn't worry so much"

"How do you know that the S1W can be trusted?"

Original Cindy shook her head. "Damn you don't trust nobody do you?" she took a drink of her beer. "Original Cindy watched them come through for Max again an' again while you and Logan were all tied up- even when Asha and her team got heat from our black helicopter friends" She could see at the pool table Asha shaking somebody's hand. Speak of the devil. "Up there's Asha Barlowe- why don't you ask her"

It could have been a different Asha. But the second the S1W and her name were used in the same sentence- Zack knew where Jondy had relocated to. "How long have you seen her around?"

"Few months shy of a whole year- why?"

Zack ignored Cindy's question and followed Asha out onto the street. To his disappointment- it took a block before she turned around to check her back and see him.

"Oh, this is going to be a blast- I just know it"

"Jondy- what are you doing in Seattle"

Asha shrugged, "The weather, come on Zack you know why" They moved into an old abandoned store front as a hoverdrone approached. "As to what I'm doing- until we know Manticore is I'm not giving up on them… I knew Logan long before Max did… you know those adoptive parents you hated so much- my mother went missing, and I needed help, and he gave it. I never told him what I was"

Of all the others, Jondy had been the only one to actually get the family. The mom, dad and sibling fairytale that they had escaped for and Zack hadn't liked that to start off with. It's where Asha came from- a name given by Margaret Curran, a mother who loved her. She had since lost her father and brother, her mother in hiding even from her. But she believed in the same things they did. Asha had maintained the fight for America's restoration- underground using her adoptive father's surname through the S1W.

"You're leaving Seattle"

"No" Asha said. "Lydecker's not even interested in Seattle apart from the informant net- and I will not let it fall into his hands…not when I can stop it" If Asha had just used her abilities to keep her mother safe during that election in '16- she'd still be in her life. That was what made it so important for her not to back down now.

Zack narrowed his eyes. "Do you have a death wish?"

"Do you?" countered Asha. "If the Eyes Only informant net is compromised… so is Jace. If it's comprised- Lydecker can use it to track down the others… and without it we lose the advantage that has kept us pretty much off the radar- come on I have to get this stick and its photos to Eyes Only"

He walked alongside her as they headed to her car. "Do you ever think, looking at Alec that you wish Ben turned out like that- instead of Max having to kill him?"

Zack frowned. "You never told Max who you were, did you"

"No" Asha said, leaning on the car. "I thought it would be better this way- that lying to her and just being the link to the S1W for Eyes Only and not a sister… but she still went away"

* * *

_**Manticore**_

* * *

Even with the resources obtained back before Cale Industries went down- they didn't match what Manticore had at its disposal. The kind of super computers that were much less of a threat when they weren't seen. Logan had built his system on his own- using his own methods. And Logan had to familiarize himself with Manticore- so he could fool the system and do what he had planning without Lydecker figuring it out right away.

Logan had already pinpointed how to turn the system off that recorded his keystrokes- what worried him was how he could get whoever was running Eyes Only to realize what he was doing. If this went wrong- he could actually end up exposing it to Manticore. He just had to believe that anyone who was good enough to run it- could notice-

"The cable hack has started transmitting"

Colonel Lydecker towered behind him. The wheelchair wasn't gone- in fact Logan had a feeling Lydecker had kept him paralyzed as some kind of Psy Op- so he wouldn't reconsider his decision. "Do it"

Logan deftly turned off the keystrokes and began to back trace the signal, and kept his eyes glued to the screen. There was no room for error and he couldn't worry about showing Lydecker how he operated on a computer. He just had to do it.

* * *

_**Seattle**_

* * *

The broadcast had been prerecorded by Matt Sung who had to get home to the family he had barely seen in the last few weeks. It was getting more and more dangerous to keep getting Matt involved and Asha knew very soon he would need to be told to stay away from this. The former detective had a family- and wasn't on Manticore's radar despite everything. It needed to stay that way.

Barely ten seconds into the transmission, a red warning message started flashing. Brain put down the chocolate bar he had been eating and began to try to block the trace.

"What's happening?" asked Alec as Asha and Zack leaned in.

"Uh what do you think is happening- an attempt to gain through a backdoor in the system that there should be less than a point eight of a percent- and I need to focus… shouldn't be happening… shouldn't be happening"

Zack slammed a hand on the desk. "Well it is- so put your head down and make sure it doesn't get through…"

Brain rubbed his bald head, and was sweating as the firewall failed. "There's something wrong here… it's like the connection is, waiting to be projected elsewhere… and one word that keeps coming through"

"What is it?" Asha asked kindly.

"It's not even a word… it's a series of numbers that make up the picture of a word… divert"

Alec looked at the others. "Maybe it means divert the signal- I mean tell me it doesn't occur to you Zack that someone in Manticore knows exactly where to strike… for all we know Lydecker is using Max against Logan or vice versa and he's waiting for us to make the system vulnerable"

"Max and Logan wouldn't do that" Asha said and looked at Brain. "We are going to go with whatever they are trying to do… worst thing comes to worse we torch the system. We give it a chance- divert the signal to the address of Mayor Beltran's house off the books… let me"

She stared at Zack and he nodded briefly. "This is unbelievable- I mean I get that an S1W girl would not be objective you probably have a huge crush on Eyes Only…but I would have thought you'd be more objective Zack"

"You are thinking of your attachment to your liability- they aren't like that- they both know better when it comes to the others or Eyes Only, you have a lot to learn about this unit Alec"

* * *

_**Manticore**_

* * *

Logan stared at the computer screen as a file displayed for the briefest of seconds- just fast enough for him to catch it.

_The light is purple._

"Just an attempt to land a Trojan in the system sir" Logan said quickly and he executed the command to the network to share files. He followed the new location the trace latched onto as if it were the original.

He didn't say anything when the signal zeroed in, and Logan leaned back and closed his eyes as if he was wishing with everything inside that he hadn't done that.

"The computer has a location sir"

Lydecker put his hand on Logan's shoulder. "You did good 208- you don't understand this now but you will"

Where ever Eyes Only really was – Asha was a part of it, and had used the one thing that no one else would know. And that with her involved- wherever Manticore ended up would be… interesting.

What Logan had bought was a week free of Psy Ops for Max. He had actually allowed Logan time with Max in her cell- probably to try to hurt their relationship by telling Max what Logan had done. Or what Lydecker had thought he had.

As Colonel Lydecker left the cell to get on a flight to Seattle, Max turned to him. She couldn't believe that Logan would do this even for her… he should know better than to think she'd want out of Psy Ops like that.

"What were you thinking Logan- selling out Eyes Only, I thought you were higher minded than that" Even after almost two weeks in Psy Ops- Max could still stand and was completely coherent. That and Lydecker had wanted her to be for this.

"Idealistic- and obsessed with my mission- sounds like me" And then Logan explained what he had really done for Lydecker.

Max stared out to make sure the guard wasn't listening and she grinned. "You- are you completely suicidal when Lydecker figures it out…"

Logan shrugged, "Then it'll be me and not you suffering for it. Besides anything I endure will be worth wherever our friend with the S1W served up for the dear Colonel"

He touched the arm rest of the wheelchair. "I'm okay Max- being back in this chair just reminds me of how I used to think this meant I was incomplete"

She looked at the wheelchair. Lydecker knew how to pick what would hurt them the most. "Used to think?"

"Now I think about how there's this soldier in me that wasn't there before- I can make the best of it and use it to my advantage, but I've lost part of myself in the process" Logan looked at her, and moved the chair as close as he could to her. "I never blamed you Max, for being stuck in this wheelchair- and all this isn't your fault either"

Max looked up and groaned. "I think the idiot patrol coming down the hall is to yank you out of here… I'd kiss you but it might ruin the whole 'I am meant to be mad' at you and I'd hate to cheat Deck out of his…prize"

* * *

_**Seattle**_

* * *

Donald Lydecker surveyed what was probably the entire sordid property. But the moment his TAC commander reported in, before that, just looking at the pink plastic flamingos on the lawn had been a indication that this overdone property filled with enough legal violations to test the best defense lawyer- that the Eyes Only mainframe wasn't here.

The only computer in this place- was the one in the bedroom. And the process had further alienated Seattle P.D. who stopped one step short of trying to shoot his men.

"Should we check the Mayor's other properties sir?" asked O'Neill, his mask resting on his head.

Lydecker shook his head. "There's nothing here… and there never was"

"You know it was an unnecessary risk to watch the operation" Zack had walked with her home and mainly it seemed to bust her over the need to watch Lydecker lose his composure a little.

Asha pulled through her bag to find her keys. "It was needed- did you know out of the crooks pretending to be politicians in Seattle, Mayor Beltrane's play house has been voted the most disturbing" It was a quiet pleasure she was taking it. And until she could take down the man who had probably forced her mother into hiding- Asha liked making his life difficult.

She unlocked the door. "Do you-?" Asha turned and saw Zack had walked off somewhere in the middle of that. He was probably thinking about what was going to happen when Lydecker realized that they had gained access to the Manticore mainframe through the trace attempt… and what would happen to Max or Logan.

Zack was not on Asha Barlowe's list of favorite people but she wished he had stayed. Her small apartment was the way it always was when she came back to it. Empty.

Asha locked the door behind her and put through the deadbolt. She pulled out her piece and sat it into an empty fishbowl. A soft mewling made Asha look down and she scooped up the small tabby cat.

"You're always happy to see me Ilya" Asha whispered as she scratched behind the tabby's ears. Being alone bothered Asha- and it always would. But it was her path in life and she had embraced it. She had tried the normal life- and it had been taken from her by predators who wanted to leave the world broken. Asha just wanted to fix it- and put it back the way it was meant to be. And that meant that one day she might get killed in the process without any help from Manticore. Asha and Jondy had mourned enough family over the years – they weren't going to get people attached to them who would have to do the same thing for them.

Even if it meant being alone.

* * *

_**Manticore**_

* * *

It had not been a real shock that the doctor had not given him a shot the previous night- and Logan knew why. Logan was afraid of Psy Ops but somehow the knowledge, that he had out- smarted the Colonel was very satisfying. It reminded him of the time he had hacked into the radio signals on Seedrow Island and had answered the question of his identity with static. And he knew going to Psy Ops for a few days was going to undo some of the progress he had made, but Logan would still have done the same thing.

It was better than going to training, sitting in his cell in the wheelchair and taking what Manticore did to him.

Logan was stretching his legs when he heard the sounds of the guards approaching his cell, and he stepped back near the wall as Colonel Lydecker entered.

"How was Seattle?" Logan asked cordially and he couldn't help the smile that came to his lips.

"You knew that they would divert the trace and it allowed them access to the system"

Lydecker had found himself less angry and irritated by the wasted trip and more… proud of what the younger man could accomplish when he used the training and the resources at his disposal.

"You did make the mistake of trusting that I would do as ordered and as someone once said- you would have to be a real idiot to let me near a computer" It was the closest the two had come to talking on equal ground- Lydecker had found Logan Cale's defiance at first as something that came with not knowing what could happen but Logan knew the price for his actions now.

The difference was in the face- while Lydecker could tell Logan was trying to make a stand, defy him- he could also see how much effort it had taken because of the relief there.

Lydecker nodded once. "And that was my error in judgment 208- and you can enjoy your victory against Manticore in Psy Ops for two weeks of reindoctrination"

The guards moved forward to restrain him and they dragged him out into the hallway. Logan watched the Colonel pull ahead of them and the words came to his mouth unbidden. "So how was the good Mayor's study…I mean you did get a good long look at the diorama? Now some say Rene Beltrane has issues, but I think he's just misunderstood"

That had not been intentional and Logan watched Colonel Lydecker stop dead in his tracks." X9 208-"

But even as Lydecker turned around, Logan found he couldn't stop. Like all those times he had fought to say how he felt to the file picture of the Colonel had just come out.

"You know I hate you more than I think I've hated anyone and if you knew the people I've taken down, my relatives you know that's not an understatement- I really hate you sir, I hate how you make me feel, scared to get up even when I was out free in the world- because every moment I knew you were trying to hunt me down. And I finally know how it was for Max for the last twelve years and every year trapped in here… you are a twisted man who is more of a soulless killer than you will ever make any of us trapped in here become for you or America" 'America' came out twisted, because it really wasn't for the good of the country. It was for the good of Manticore's agendas and very little good could ever come of that.

It was not even a little amusing anymore- and Lydecker could note the look of concealed horror that Logan held, for speaking without censor. "Logan you don't belong out there anymore- it's time you accepted your reality"

All Max had done with him was draw Logan Cale out- pulled apart the shield Eyes Only had created to protect himself from the reindoctrination. And there was nowhere left for Logan to hide from him.

"Lydecker" Logan threw all caution to the wind, it was better to go down fighting than quietly every time, and even the soldier agreed. "Go to hell"

* * *

_**To Be Continued…**_

* * *

Okay the end was mainly spontaneous as in unplanned… but I like it even if it's dark as all blazes… yep I need help.

Thanks for reading.


	20. Moments Of Weakness

Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel- James Cameron does- and FOX should take note because Avatar kicked ass- and they should let him do the Dark Angel movie… okay third last chapter and this pretty much starts to set up the end from here.

* * *

**Chapter Twenty**

**Moments Of Weakness**

* * *

_**Manticore**_

* * *

The Colonel didn't lead them straight into Psy Ops to start the session and Logan was worried for a moment that he was going to see Max in there. Logan's relief at it not being her was very short lived.

Ames White was far different from the family man in the picture. It was taking four guards to get him strapped down and White was fighting the entire way down. His face was contorted in rage- and Logan knew how much worse this must have been for Special Agent White.

Ames White had never been involved with Manticore- in fact the only black mark on his record was an anger management problem after attacking a suspect for 'looking at him the wrong way'. In White's defense the man had just blown up an office block for the May 22nd movement. Although, there were many of Special Agent White's suspects that 'died resisting arrest'.

The guards finally got White restrained and then got well away from the man the second they had the chance.

"This has been made possible because of you" Lydecker said. He wasn't even looking at the scene just Logan's reaction to White. "Dr. Vertes gave up the methodology before she died but it was all structured around you. It was very gratifying when I saw you that night… because of you- we can now replicate the success and continue the X9 project"

Logan wanted to retort but all he could do was watch White yell and scream as the Psy Op techs moved in. "He has a family- why someone like him?"

He looked at Lydecker and tried not to flinch as the Colonel kept studying him. Flinching would undermine what he was asking, which was why Lydecker had the sick and twisted need to go after individuals who had families who loved them. That would be hurt by the loss of the ones they loved. Not that Logan thought it was anymore right to after people who wouldn't be missed- the entire project was wrong and it was his fault that they could do this. He was to blame.

"It would do no good to recruit criminals or just anyone, what Manticore needs are individuals capable of loyalty that are talented in their fields, potential- positive attributes"

Lydecker moved forward and the guards forced Logan to follow him. The sounds vanished as soon as they entered the next room- almost identical, with an observation area overlooking the Psy Ops room. But this time they went inside the room and Logan found it hard to fight back. He was frozen with the knowledge that he could kill the guards even by hitting one of them too hard.

By the time Logan had started to try to push them back, it was too late as the straps were tightened. It was one thing to know what his actions would bring it was another to be back in this place. That this wasn't just some nightmare- that the harness was not just his sheets tangled about from moving in his sleep.

The Psy Op tech in the corner of his eye was holding a vial and pulling the liquid out with the syringe and Logan broke out in a cold sweat.

"_Logan" Max massaged his forehead and looked at Sam Carr. "Is there some other way to take this, without a needle?"_

_Dr. Carr shook his head. "Max unless he takes something stronger than a pill is capable of he is going to have a psychotic break coming off the drugs Manticore pumped through his system, I can always bring gas from the hospital- make sure he'd out first"_

Logan's memories of those first early days were firmly engraved in his mind, and the second he could get away with refusing to take the anti-psychotics, he had stopped. Just the thought of anything in his body…

He knew he couldn't move his arm, but Logan strained and tried as the tech's cold hand rested on his arm as the needle point stuck into his elbow and injected the drug.

The tech inserted the eye piece that forced his right eye to stay open and a single tear slipped down Logan's face.

He couldn't close his eyes to block the red light of the laser that seemed to make everything fade, until the images and words were the only things in his mind.

* * *

For Unit Five the chance to be away from being watched and away from the trainers had come when on the retrieval exercise. The terrain was rocky and open in places and there was dense wood in others. A river cut through right up to the fence and the isolated back road was used as an access.

The trainers that supervised were all up near Manticore rather than actually observing the exercise.

Biggs quickly snapped the neck of the prisoner. Usually the unit liked to drag the exercise out- it was outside and gave them the chance to improvise. Now every second would count when it came to being able to talk freely.

"This isn't working" Vic gestured to Eris. Eris had slipped up in diagnostic and repair- no names but she had been quietly muttering like she always did as in repairs. It was flagged as a violation of standing orders and she had been put through the ringer of a week in Psy Ops.

Cece was breaking a stick in her hand. "I know- we all know…since when did we become pariahs around here?" Cece looked at Biggs as the broken pieces fell to the ground as she brushed her hands off. "Tell them what you saw when you were on your way out from getting the orders for your mission"

Biggs felt the strongest brush of shame, no one in the unit had wasted time blaming him for long. They all had to stick together but Biggs was keenly aware that he had brought this on them all. "The filing cabinets were open and I saw a file with our unit- flagged. We're being assigned to Psy Ops- six months of simplification evaluations and then they are breaking up the unit"

"Six months?" That was from Skittles who was looking pale under his freckles- he had been young enough to avoid the full simplification process that had occurred after the escape in 2009. He had never been in Psy Ops longer than a few weeks straight.

From up in the tree that she was using as a look out, Jesse frowned and used the sign language to Kiron that they had learned for a deep cover operation three years ago.

"This makes no sense- we haven't done anything to provoke it"

"Yes we have" Biggs replied cynically. "We've shown Command time and again that we have personalities but they just dismissed it as a quirk of the best however when Alec went rogue they weren't willing to let us keep them because of the 09'ners. This is all happening because I couldn't keep my stupid mouth shut"

Cece shook her head. "Remember back in Nevada- after he came back from the Berrisford assignment and with everything Renfro was putting us though before that, somehow we were still who we were after simplification"

"If at first you don't succeed…" Kiron gave a humorless laugh. "We could always 'escape'" It was only a dry joke, to break the tension but one soldier in the unit spoke out on the thought that had crossed most of their minds after the joke.

"Why don't we" All fifteen heads turned straight to Gem. Gem didn't make jokes and she looked completely serious. "Come on, we have all thought about it – before the 09'niners actually pulled it off"

"So?" snapped Quinn, "That would make us traitors, we would be disobeying a directive-"

"Bite me Quinn" Gem stood toe to toe with him, she was far shorter than he was but he backed down first. "We all wanted to do what they did- or at least this unit used to and we hated them for it. We have all spent so much time in Psy Ops being told that wanting to be more than a number is wrong and that the 09'ners are deserters and don't care for their fellow soldiers. But we've heard the reports of them risking everything to save each other and the ordinaries in their lives"

Kiron nodded. "656 sacrificed herself for her son…"

"Okay, say you're right but none of us bar Biggs are cleared for missions" Quinn interjected before they could all go insane and sign up to the traitorous notion. "And the moment we head for that fence the X7's will either blow us away or drag us back but I guess we will have earned our Psy Ops"

"Then we call a friend" Cece said cryptically. "I have an idea but everyone has to trust I have our backs covered so put your hand high if you'd rather 'earn' Psy Ops and try to do what we should have done back in '09. Or if you are gonna stay, in which case we promise to lock you in a trunk… just don't tell"

Everyone's hands went up and Quinn hesitated for a moment. Then his hand went up too. "Let's go back to base, Gem and Biggs hold up"

Cece waited until the rest of the unit was out of sight and then she turned to them. "By friend, you know who I mean"

"You really think they would help or trust us" Gem asked bluntly. "We have spat in their faces, and done everything within our power to drag them back here…besides how do we get a message to them?"

"Me" Biggs shrugged as the two women looked at him, surprised that he had volunteered. "Of course this all depends on 452. I mean without her telling us something only she'd know to let them know that this on the level, they will never believe us. We need her to believe that we are telling the truth before we do anything else"

* * *

Max knew it was inappropriate and that if she was any louder the guard would hear her and realize she had been taken out of her cell. But she couldn't stop laughing. It sounded ridiculous- this arrogant, self assured unit was asking for her help so that they could convince the others to help them escape. Convince the others that a trap wasn't a trap.

"I change my mind, this is a waste of time" 581 muttered. "452's not going to help"

She smiled. "Try Max, I might just be more open if you drop the designations, I already have his name although it better not have come from any boast or anything" Max's eyes flicked downwards with Biggs and she gave a small smirk. "I can see why you'd want to compensate though- was there a mistake with your cocktail like a 'you're more female than male' deal?"

The X5 with the red hair snorted as Biggs predictably tensed. "No, I'm Gem and that's Cece and can we cut the crap? It won't take long for this to all fall apart if anyone notices you gone"

"Okay Gem, how do I know that you're on the level?" Max asked. "I've heard about all the mind games and all the things that happened with Logan and I can't just help you because you say you want out- how do I know that it's even true?"

Biggs looked at her. "There's nothing we can say that'll make a difference is there- same with Manticore. You think we spent our days dreaming of escape… butterflies and rainbows in our heads? This is our last resort, to stay together and stay ourselves"

Trusting them could turn out to be a bigger mistake than trusting Lydecker on the night of the botched job on the DNA lab and on the off chance that the others could even help. And if it was all just a ruse? It boiled down to just too big of a chance to take, even for Max. "You're asking me to put 'my' family in danger and I'm sorry but I can't do it"

"Please" Cece begged, past caring about appearances. She would do whatever it took to save her unit. "Please 452… Max, please. You all figured out that you wanted out twelve years ago. You were the best, the elites and Colonel Lydecker's favorites and you all realized that family is more important- just like it is for us"

Max's resolve weakened, she didn't know why but she believed her. "Never abandon your unit – the only thing I know that Manticore got right" Max paused.

"Say you are telling the truth, we had to accept what was going to happen to the brothers and sisters we left behind. There will be repercussions for every X series soldier still trapped in Manticore. You'll be hunted down for the rest of your lives, can you live with that?"

* * *

_**Portland**_

* * *

Most cities in America were divided into sectors. Although while some cities like Seattle were very hard to get into and out of the various sectors- Portland was not as hard and the trunk of the car didn't even get checked out. As the car was waved through, Asha drove forward. "Finally"

"Thanks- which one is it, Asha or Jondy?"

"Asha"

Alec leaned back. "Thanks for coming along, I mean I know Biggs well enough to know that this is probably not a set up but thanks for doing this" Alec still had the papers that were all set to get him and Rachel out of the state. But it would have been wrong to take off without seeing if there was anything he could do when it came to finding where Manticore was.

So when Biggs had left a message at the Blowfish Tavern and outlined a mission in enough detail and a time for a meet, Alec had known this was his chance.

"It's not a problem" Asha said, and she drew into a car park next to an old cinema.

He winced. "I'm sorry for saying the other day that stuff about you crushing on Logan and thinking badly of them. They teach us not to trust any of you and sometimes it's hard to let go of that, if that's what's bugging you"

She turned the car off. "It's not that- my sister used to live here, Tinga"

"Sorry" Alec apologized and looked at her, curious about something. "You guys are all separated for security and stuff- it must have been good to be with your sister all those months"

Asha's shoulders shook for a moment with silent laughter and Alec looked at her strangely. "I'm sorry, I could never tell Max who I was and even if I had… she was thinking about Logan the entire time and she never gave up on him"

"I don't buy this whole secret identity thing you have going" Alec said. "What if I had shot you that night- you could have just grabbed the gun back from me"

"And clue you in that I was X5, I don't think so. Getting shot is better than having to give up the S1W" Of course they went in smart. They had grabbed Biggs before the time of the meet, right after his assassination and brought him here.

They got out and moved to the trunk, and Asha clicked it open. "Come on" Asha muttered to the unconscious X5 as she pulled Biggs out.

Alec helped carrying Biggs, just in case anyone was watching so they wouldn't wonder why a girl could carry a man by herself. "If you don't mind I'm going to say I hit him, it might bruise his ego that he got hit by a girl…I mean you are meant to be an ordinary"

The last thing Biggs could remember after placing the container he had retrieved from his target in his cheap motel room was a sharp pain to the head. He opened his eyes and could see only black- a blindfold. "Come on, I said no tricks" His voice echoed slightly and Biggs knew he must be in something with a high enough ceiling to cause an echo like that.

"Well I don't trust your word like I used to" Alec.

"Don't be such a girl"

There was a silence and someone leaned close to his ear. "Well this girl laid you out- sorry Alec it had to be done"

"I left the message for a reason" Biggs swallowed. "Alec, you are my brother first and foremost. I never should have lied to you about Rachel, I know that now but you have to listen. Manticore's sending our unit for reprogramming"

Alec felt his heart sink and he forced himself to bury the pain. "I can't turn myself in- it won't change anything besides there are people out here counting on me too"

"No Alec- the unit, our family isn't accepting it this time- I came to ask for help from the 09'niners…we're going to escape"

Of all the things that could have come out from Biggs and that was the one line Asha hadn't counted on. Even as a trick. "Alright then Biggs, I am Jondy and it's nice to meet you and since we are such good friends, you won't mind telling me where Manticore's location is?" she asked rolling her eyes and moved to leave. Alec could handle this.

"It's in Alaska in what used to be a national reserve called Noatak… horrible place- I mean why do they always pick places like this?"

Asha stopped and turned to Alec. "Go call Brain- ask him to track down some satellite picture… we'll see soon enough if he's telling the truth"

She watched him leave and stepped in front of Biggs. "And even if you are, you could still be messing with us for Lydecker- now you may be able to fool your brother but not me, so just spit out what Lydecker's planning now"

"Do you know what even Zack has his moments of weakness means? We knew you wouldn't believe it unless we asked your sister…Max said that you should consider it a moment of weakness"

* * *

_**Noatak National Reserve, Alaska**_

_**Manticore**_

* * *

He could feel his legs dragging on the ground beneath him, but Logan was having trouble staying conscious let alone mustering the strength to try fighting the guards. When they dropped him back in his cell, he knew that the session had lasted longer than it usually had. Logan lost time in Psy Ops- it was pretty hard to hold onto time in there but it had been longer than a day.

Logan couldn't move at all. It was all he could do to make sure he hadn't lost anything and he was fighting the instinct to safeguard himself. To forget what he knew again, Logan knew he might not remember a second time and that by doing it he might be giving up and letting Colonel Lydecker have his way.

The lights were out and Logan kept staring at the concrete ceiling. He struggled to get up as he heard quiet footfalls approach the cell door.

The door creaked open and Max slipped in. "It's me 'Logie' " she said and moved to help him sit up and he pushed her off and sat on the rack himself. "Would it kill you to get help?"

"Sorry. How did you get in here?"

"Your friendly Manticore transgenics- Logan, you never mentioned they all went by names or that they look out for each other"

Logan rested his head in his hands. "I was trying not to make you worry that I was still thinking about them as allies rather than the enemy"

Max rolled her eyes. "Logan, that's where Zack has it wrong" She didn't want to get his hopes up, there were no guarantees that the others would come through or that this would not go all pear shaped anyway. "He wants to think of them all as the enemy and it's easier to live the world black and white but then you really can't do anything to change things"

She leaned in closer. "I know Psy Ops is bad but you look like someone ran you over… like when I rescued you"

"It's because I won't forget this time"

She blinked at him. "Forget?"

Logan nodded, and he looked up at her. "I made myself forget your name last time Max. It wasn't the Colonel it was me… I couldn't let him take you from me and it went so wrong- it was like I forgot how to stand up"

Max needed a moment. She needed a few years really but Manticore never allowed for that kind of coping. He had forgotten her name in the way she had been taught to forget things- and she knew he had done it to protect her. But it hurt most of all because she knew it had kept him safe for those months and for the sake of the long shot out of here- she had to… she had to ask him to do it again. "Logan, you have to forget again"

"No there is- I can't do it again" Logan shifted away from her, and Max felt her insides get all twisted- like someone had just punched her in the stomach. "Please, Max… you don't understand…" He sounded over coherent and like he was trying to keep his emotions from getting the better of him.

"Then make me understand!" Max was almost whispering and her voice laced with an edge of desperation. "They are killing you in there."

Logan took a shuddering breath as he fought down the lingering effects of the psychoactives still affecting his mind. "The last time I forgot, Max… you saw the end results… I couldn't hold on anymore- it has been hard these last few months to put it all back together…. I could never do it again… I'd lose myself and instead of being just a mindless soldier- I would be one who would never remember…like Brin was but permanently"

There was nothing Max could say that would get him to change his mind.

* * *

After leaving the cell, for a moment Max walked ahead of Gem and paused out of the guard's line of sight. "Don't freak, I'm not going to do anything stupid" she said and Gem stared at the 09'niner- tears had fallen down her face.

"You really do think-"

The smile on Max's face was more contemplative than anything else as she thought about Alec and what she had said to him. "Think about someone other than myself, yeah, it's not very rat-like of me is it?"

Gem was honest. "Not anything like how Command described you as- what are you all really like?"

"We have names, we love and we would give our lives for each other- really? We are a whole lot like you except we are the path that you haven't taken… until now"

* * *

Alec knew he had a hard road ahead of him. Biggs had told the truth and despite the deep sense of betrayal that Alec still felt, this was what he had to do. If he did nothing, his entire unit would be destroyed in Psy Ops but if he did this… the casualties of the first escape were well known of- Manticore had made certain of that. But it stuck with Alec for a different reason than loyalty and duty.

He had just found Rachel again and after the last few years holding himself responsible for her death- Alec could hold her the way he holding her was now.

Her strength and resilience astounded him. She should have hated him and her father or have become a wreck but then Rachel Berrisford had never been the girl won over by cheap ploys and lines like 'a unique creature unlike any other'. Her father had brought Manticore down on them but she could forgive her father because he was trying to do something good. Rachel could forgive him because she loved him and when it had mattered the most, he had told her the truth.

She was unaware that Manticore wanted her alive and Alec felt the greatest shame knowing why.

Lydecker was obsessed with his favorites and to Alec's greatest disgust- he had become one of them. Hurting Rachel, for Lydecker was not too far removed than hurting Logan to get to Max. He went after the things that meant the most.

"I don't want to lose you" Rachel said, trying to hide her fear by not looking at him as she broke away. "But this is your family and if I could save my father… it's why you have to do this even though-" she couldn't finish her sentence.

Alec wanted to lie to her. He wanted to say nothing was going to happen but he couldn't promise that. "I just found you again and if this wasn't about them or Max and Logan I would be riding off into the sunset with you. Manticore taught one thing that I will always keep with me Rachel, 'never abandon your unit'… you are a part of my unit, my family and I will do everything I can to come back from this"

Hand in hand, Alec and Rachel walked away from the graveyard where Robert Berrisford was buried. Alec didn't have many regrets except for one when it came to his mission now. When Robert had been talking about doing what was the right thing, and what was right for his daughter- Alec wished he hadn't been 494.

That he had been able to warn Berrisford and run back when it could have made a difference for his unit. When they wouldn't have had to pick between loyalty to Command and family. Asha, Jondy or whatever her name was had told him that 'moments of weakness' meant whenever Zack had a moment where he acted like a normal person who felt and wanted a place where he belonged.

Alec had a different definition for it. His moments of weakness were the ones he had let Manticore hurt the people he cared about through his own inaction.

Never again.

* * *

_**To Be Continued…**_

* * *

This was the last chapter before the penultimate chapter or more commonly known as second to last. And the following is a hint of what is to come.

* * *

Chapter 21:

"… _we lived the dream and they paid the price"_

Family has driven both Unit Five and the 09'ners and now it will drive the 09'ners and Alec to work together to save their brothers and sisters left behind. To get history to repeat itself in the one act that has shaped the last twelve years.

But it might cost them more than they ever realized it could- Manticore's goal to strip them of their humanity has created a monster and it will kill until it gets what it wants.

* * *

And now all I'll say is it's not Max or Logan and if you re-read past chapters you might figure out who it is.


	21. The Escape of May '21

Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel. I do own possibly ninety percent of the merchandize they released for it. This story has been a fun ride and this is the second last chapter so let's answer the big question from the last chapter and get on with the story.

And if anyone doesn't realize what the big twist is yet, it's the chapter title.

Warnings: Character Deaths, Violence.

* * *

**Chapter Twenty One**

**The Escape of May '21**

* * *

_**The X5 Reunion - Las Vegas, Nevada**_

* * *

'**This is the contact number- codeword Eva at the prearranged meeting point at the Saratoga- the room's set. No chatter to the fearless leader. Over and out'**

Zane almost felt bad for conning his neighbor into loaning him her car. Almost- but then the blonde had insisted on coming along- saying she needed the vacation. She only let him drive because she talked so much. He had needed a different car than his own in case he needed to make a quick getaway- he liked his restored mustang too much to turf it.

He quickly glanced back to his younger sister who was doing a pretty good imitation of Zack. Like Jack, Rae had a few more wires than the others did loose- which made her seize most of the time and under threat of a neurological stroke. So when she seized- the neighbor nicknamed in his head Ditzy had asked if his sister was a 'special needs'… regardless, it had not gone down well.

"Just here" Zane said pointing to the casino in question. "I'd invite you but it's a family reunion, as in family only"

Ditzy looked confused and Zane took the chance to get out, his sister got out a moment later.

"Are you ever going to speak to me again?" Zane asked.

"Depends if Lydecker captures me and erases the last two days from my mind" Rae replied and the scathing undertone was not undeserved. It had been the road trip from hell staring Ditzy as Satan, the woman temporarily filling in for Lydecker.

But it still burned. Zane smiled in relief when he saw Krit and Syl at the desk pulling their 'couple' act. Those two were close- but not in the naughty way. Ever since the escape the two had only lived about fifty miles apart and broke Zack's no contact rule constantly.

He waved over at them and Syl smiled back, she looked excited. Truth was that even if Zane had no idea why Jondy had called this illicit meet, he was glad to be here. He felt more at home with the others than with any of the strangers that filled his life.

But as Zane watched Ben- no his twin, 'Alec' talking to Vada, it reminded Zane of who wasn't here.

Seth and Tinga were dead and then there were the siblings trapped in Manticore. Max, Kavi, Ben and even if the only time Zane had met Logan Cale was the cable hack- he counted him as part of the family along with Charlie Smith and Case. Not just for the Eyes Only save, but because he knew what Max was and still wanted her. Zane had been close with someone normal once, Kiesha. He had told her the truth and she couldn't run fast enough.

"Hey"

Zane turned around and Brin was right there behind him. He nodded, and tried not to show how much her being here and not one of them meant to him. It felt wrong to want one of his sisters but with Brin it had been different and she had even felt the same way. And now Brin didn't even meet his eye. Zane's only consolation was that sometime down the road- Lydecker would find out about this meeting and hopefully cry like a baby at missing the entire unit.

The last time, in memory that Asha could recall the others looking shocked like this was when Lydecker had shot Eva the night of the escape. She knew it was going to be hard to sway them, hell even she wasn't so sure on this one. But something was telling her that this was what they had to do. They were all sitting in the conference room that had been set aside and all it had taken was a thick wad of cash that she hadn't wanted to know how Alec had gotten his hands on.

Krit was the first one to speak. "The last time we broke in Manticore, the mission failed and that was without trusting them- no offense Alec, but this is insane"

"Insane" Vada bit her lip, "How about instead we all march up to the gate, wave and sit down with our legs crossed. I'm sure it's the easier way to hand all of us over to Lydecker"

Alec almost could put Kiron and Cece in the two siblings places because that was the dynamic that he was picking up. Maybe it was just a family thing or maybe it was just a Manticore thing. He cleared his throat. "I know it's hard to swallow but they really want out"

Across the table Rae who was sitting next to Brin laughed. "Yeah, you know whoever 297 is when they were trying to bring me in said that it'd be a waste of Manticore's time and instead of reindoctrination I should be dissembled" she held up her shaking hand. "Because I'm so defective, no wait- he said all of us because we are a stain that needs to be removed"

Quinn. Alec wondered if he would try and report to Lydecker on the plan… no that would mean hurting the unit and Quinn never put his personal feelings before their unit. But whether his younger brother would escape or not- that was a different matter entirely.

"If this went sideways like the attempt on the DNA lab we could lose everything, say we deal with the X7s- there are still the other soldiers who aren't us, and aren't your unit Di- Alec" Syl said, correcting herself. "They'd think nothing less of getting into it"

Krit nodded. "And we would be counting on your unit to disable the choppers and lock down the cells- and we barely trust you."

"You want to get into it?" Alec demanded, his hands curling into fists. "Because if they said they'll come through, that's what they're going to do!"

Asha felt like banging her head into the table when Vada sneered and muttered something about oversimplified brain cells. What had she been thinking- that somehow, someway they could all come to an agreement?

"We should do it" Zane had spoken softly but everyone stopped and looked at him. "We are the enemy, they are- what were they twelve years ago?"

Vada looked uncomfortable. "Our brothers and sisters, but then-"

"Then we escaped and they didn't" Brin hadn't wanted to come. To look them all in the eye and them knowing everything that had happened. That Tinga's death had been on her hands. She was the reminder of what they were scared would happen if they were recaptured. But Brin knew she was the one who could understand the most about this chance. "And they hate us for it- we left them behind, not just Jace and the others of our own unit but the other X5 units. The ones we tagged teamed with and the ones who were always left in the dust next to us… we lived the dream and they paid the price"

Syl smiled sadly. "They're right to hate us- I mean we got them thrown in Psy Ops, we got them simplified- they couldn't hurt us so they hurt them"

"I felt guilty after the escape" Asha admitted, and she felt shame that on some level she was scared of being Jondy and being attached to everyone in the room. "I had this great family, I could grow my hair, and sometimes all I could think about was that our brothers and sisters were trapped inside Manticore"

Krit looked at her. "It's really short now"

"Long hair gets caught places and it's a pain to wash"

Zane looked at Alec and then at his family. "We owe them and if Alec's unit wants out we have to help them do it- I mean this could have been us. Imagine if they had escaped instead, it was more likely than us"

Brin finally met him in the eye. "We were Lydecker's unit- he was harder on us than any other unit in Manticore, we were lucky we were able to want to get of there and until now there hasn't been another…family who wanted the same that we did"

"Okay, okay" Vada groaned, "All in favor of kissing our transgenics asses good bye on this suicide mission- raise your hand like first graders" She raised her hand first and then Krit's hand edged up. Brin did a mock salute with her middle finger and raised hers, followed by Syl and Rae.

Alec raised his quickly and noted how Asha hesitated and then raised hers. Zane grinned as he waved his hand in the air and the door opened. Caught.

"Who told?" asked Syl.

Asha shrugged. "I think he just found the message, I mean the whole point was to beat him here and talk- seems we finished just in time"

Zack was very talented at being a blank slate. He also seemed to have a temper that often proved to be the type of hindrance he lectured them all over on.

He didn't look happy now and Asha knew he was itching to yell at them. "Don't tell me you actually told the others 846's bull about wanting out- Max was obviously compromised"

"After what- a month of Psy Ops?" Asha asked, knowing at this point sugar coating it would do more harm than good.

"So what, you are going to 'storm' in?" Zack's voice was dripping in scorn and he looked at the others. "With what- you all keep saying you don't want to be soldiers and that you want normal lives. You've all let yourselves become weak and Lydecker would be laughing as he took you down one by one"

Vada started to bait him. "Big brother you sound like Lydecker but hell- you let Max talk you into running into Manticore outnumbered and blow up the DNA lab- this is not the same and it will do a lot more damage in the long run"

She then scrawled something on the notepad in front of her and held up the smiley face. "You know in school we send kids like you to the corner"

Not even the hint of concession. Zack shook his head. "If you do this I won't help you"

"Zack" Brin looked at him, "We need you, we'll do exactly what you need us to do- you're our CO and you are the only way we'll pull this off. The only thing we won't do is call you 'sir'- besides do you really want to say 'I told you' so this time?"

"And then there's really getting up Lydecker- we do this and the old man might just have a heart attack this time" Krit offered, "Besides- it goes sideways and you are the CO of what- rocks?"

His unit had never played him like this. Alec was used to the chain of command or his unit listening to his word over everything else. But this was different- it seemed to be more the 09'niners acknowledged Zack as their commanding officer but they would defy him if they had to. They covered their reluctance and doubts with jokes but they all clearly followed his lead most of the time.

All Zack had to do was put his foot down and at least half of them would follow suit and Alec realized this all was in Zack's hands.

And Alec really regretted the stuff he did in Manticore to Zack now. But how was he to know that the future of his own unit would lay with Stone Face a.k.a. Zack?

Zack looked at them all, Asha and Alec in particular. "You follow my lead to the letter and we plan this the same way- no improvisation, no 'I want to save the nomilies' and if I pull the pin a minute to zero hour- we abort is that understood?"

"Yes Zack" There was one 'yes sir' and it came from Vada- who seemed pleased with Zack's reaction to it which was for a split second fine and then the next was like storm clouds had crossed his face.

Alec could just tell this was a disaster in the making but even if it all went wrong and he never got to see Rachel again… at least he didn't abandon his unit.

* * *

_**Noatak National Reserve, Alaska- **__**Manticore**_

_**May, 2021**_

* * *

From the moment that he had been told, Logan had wanted to believe that Max had not gone insane. He really did but this? Logan kept his eyes trained on the sparring match between X5 453 and another X5. Maybe it was Manticore or the result of the two weeks of Psy Ops that was telling him the escape plan wouldn't work.

His doubts were all coming from the soldier, at least the ones that told him that Command was omnipotent and that there was no possible way they could pull it off without detection. Colonel Lydecker was not… he wasn't all powerful. This all came from refusing to forget- and if the Colonel had gotten wind of the truth- Logan doubted he would have made it out of Psy Ops intact. Or at all and as it was, something other than Max and himself was occupying the Colonel and Logan knew with a sick feeling what it was.

It was sending Unit 5 to Psy Ops. Going over personality profiles and figuring out the best way to break them down into mindless soldiers.

X5 231 blocked the blow and sent them apart. Without an escape- he, Max and the unit were done. Lydecker would supervise the first few sessions and then focus back in on them. Logan knew Max was strong; she could handle herself at least for another few months. But Logan knew another prolonged session or two in his own case… he wouldn't want out anymore and after that Max would be alone, no allies at all.

Everything was riding on this. Logan caught Biggs making a slight facial twitch and read the friendly smile from it. Logan found it easy to forgive Biggs and not just because he didn't have to think whether or not he was the enemy anymore. Biggs didn't have the benefit of a past on the outside or someone who had made his question. What had happened with Rachel came from the only way Biggs had known to handle it and whether or not Alec would ever forgive him was something else.

"That's enough 453"

"Yes sir!" Logan found 453- the definition for her was a sociopath. All she knew was Manticore and she reveled in it and did everything to stand out and be the best. She craved the attention of the Colonel but never got it and it made her twisted. Or that was what Logan guessed was the root cause. He didn't quite know what had happened in between the time he had first met her pretending to be Max and now but something had changed for the worst with 453.

453 had enjoyed beating 231 into a pulp and Logan knew that if she ever got the chance, she would kill Max happily.

The Sergeant was mere millimeters from Logan's face. "X9 208, join X5 581 on the mat now!" And the guards were just waiting for him to object. It was good the possibility of escape was on his mind because that was all that kept him from taking a stand now.

Logan walked across at the same time Cece did. For this not to become suspicious Unit 5 had to have nothing but disdain and hate for him. He after all had been the one to put their CO in touch with Rachel which had made him go rogue.

"208. I'm surprised you can even look me in the eye without 452 holding your hand" Cece hissed softly.

Logan brought up a look of indifference. "Your CO is quite happy out of this prison and I can see why he would miss you"

"Cut the chatter soldiers" The reprimand was all it took to send Cece after him. Anyone who was watching, their impression of the fight would be Logan struggling against the blows from Cece, who was showing her Manticore 'loyalty'. In reality, Logan was holding his own just fine and Cece was forcing the feelings behind the blows.

Sometime into the sparring, the fighting became more instinctual for them both, they couldn't cause injury but they both still wanted to win. Logan recalled a move that Zack had shown him in the apartment and he waited for Cece to flip behind him. It was all about not trying to clear the space the moment they were behind him. Instead Logan waited for the blow to come and then grabbed the arm and sent Cece over his shoulder. The force would have injured a normal person but it winded her instead.

Logan stepped back, he hadn't expected that to work but it didn't stop the smile. He had never managed to best another X5 in combat. "Nice work 208"

Colonel Lydecker. The smile faded from Logan's face as the heavy feeling came back in full force. The Colonel was here to retrieve him and send him back to his cell after another round of what Max liked to call 'the mind screw'.

And the only way to get out of this place tonight was to be able to run. Logan needed his legs and for once it wasn't just a desire, something to make him complete. It was an actual need.

The unit was headed back towards the mess hall. Biggs took advantage of the guards talking and slipped next to Cece. "Did you let him do that?"

"Shut up" Cece said and her lips were barely moving. "You know I was holding back"

Biggs was silent as the guards full attention went back onto them. The anticipation, this waiting was unbearable. If they were going to fail, Biggs would rather have failed than to just be like this. He had asked 452, Max about the escape. It hadn't been planned and according to Max, she doubted even 599 had given it thought like this. It had been unplanned, after the Colonel had killed their sister. Max was holding back something about it but Biggs got the picture. The difference was the 09'ners had once had absolute faith and reverence for the Colonel in a way their unit never had for the late Director Renfro.

The betrayal had been on two sides that night and Biggs wondered if they still would have escaped if 'Eva' had not been shot dead by Colonel Lydecker. Then Max had asked if they still would want to run if they got to stay a unit after simplification. Sometimes not knowing the answer was better.

Jondy obviously had been so busy fighting everyone else's doubts that she had barely dwelled on her own. When Zack went looking for his sister, Jondy was inside the Kwik-E mart's bathroom. Her hands were on the sink and her knuckles were white.

"Jondy- if you're not up to this, tell me now" Zack asked, crossing his arms.

"It's Asha" Asha normally found it ironic that Zack of all people was asking her to hold onto something from the past but she always let it go. But that irony was a slap in the face now. Doing this, Asha remembered she was not human. And that part of her life was dragging her back in and she hated that part. "I'll be up to it- it's just hard, not that you would know"

Zack looked disgusted. "Five minutes- we're on a timetable here Jondy" Asha closed her eyes as he left and tried not to give in to the overwhelming desire just to run. Max needed her and she couldn't fail her again. Not like this. Asha knew if she ran now, then it would never matter how much she preached fighting the powers, corruption and fixing America. It'd be hollow- because she would be running from facing the embodiment of everything she was against.

_**

* * *

**_

Manticore

* * *

The room was one of the basements and Logan had been standing there at attention for the last twenty minutes just waiting. Usually this would be where a technician would be waiting, the Colonel would demand his designation or that was how it had been the last five days. Instead the Colonel had left and Logan could just see the medical technician setting up the tray. After a long moment, two guards dragged someone forward from the back and Logan recognized the man after the blindfold came off. Gerhardt Bronk.

_Logan watched- all aware of how helpless he was. If he didn't tell Bronk- they were going to kill Matt. His secret- he knew how important it was to keep it from falling into enemy hands and that Bronck would probably just kill them both anyway. But Matt wasn't suffering for working for Eyes Only- this was all a show of him so he could watch his friend die._

Bronck wasn't restrained and he stood up after looking at the guards. "Well if it isn't Eyes Only, I never thought you would be working for the military"

"I'm not" Logan spat and fell silent. He had a feeling Bronck would enjoy the truth of the situation. After Max had swung in and saved everyone and when Matt had been taking Gerhardt Bronck in- he hadn't been able to look at the man without thinking about everything he had done. Led to the deaths of so many, trafficking young girls and all of that paled to seeing his old friend in pain because of who he was.

Max had been right. It was one thing to take the risks for him. It was another when it put someone else in the line of fire. Logan knew now that he never should have asked Max to risk her life, her freedom to help him.

The smug expression on Bronck's face was almost intolerable. "I was told to thank you for my early release, so thank you"

For the first time Logan could remember, he was relieved to see the Colonel. Colonel Lydecker had reentered the room and the guards moved Bronck to the far side.

"State your designation"

Logan dispassionately looked straight ahead, ignoring Bronk. "X9 208" The numbers felt horrible on his tongue but his main problem was now with the barcode on the back of his neck. Even if they were able to escape, there was nothing that he could do to get the brand off the back of his neck.

"I know you are just playing the game soldier" Colonel Lydecker moved besides him. "It took quite some effort to locate Mr. Bronk, your sources buried him in the prison system well" It was meant as praise and Logan didn't even think about how it made him feel. "He's a security risk- we haven't interrogated him and I am curious how many of your people he could expose if we did" The C- Lydecker pulled out his sidearm and handed it to Logan.

Logan looked at him. "What are your orders, sir?" He knew what they would be but Logan wanted to delay it as long as he could. He couldn't even hear what Lydecker said to him next but Logan knew the order. Even if he wasn't sent to Psy Ops for disobeying the order- he would be paralyzed. Unable to stand up or to leave and the escape- what if Max refused to run without him? And all because he couldn't do this, carry out an order that would be crossing the line. Murder was always against the rules and he would be doing this of his own free will. Being a soldier voluntarily and Logan didn't know if he could ever come back from that. Logan felt his hand holding the gun drop to his side.

Bronck started to laugh. "You hear the urban legends but you never believe them to be true. It is worth losing those months in prison now. Eyes Only… tell me how it feels to be the good guy now… I suppose I could always look up Detective Won-ton and-" The bullet was quick and the red patch spread out for a moment across Bronck's shirt before Gerhardt Bronck fell to his knees and then the ground.

A transgenic could bring up their weapon within a second. X9 208 lowered the gun and let it slip from his grasp.

* * *

Her former roommate had asked her once why she hated going to the gym. Every time Kendra hooked up with some loaded guy she always managed to get one with gym access. But there had been just something about running in the same place that reminded her of Manticore. That and it was a pain to pretend to struggle with weights and stuff when she could put body builders on steroids to shame.

Lydecker had been nowhere to be found all day but then he was putting her through all these tests for fitness and health. It was probably because as much as he wanted to devote time to breaking her, he got to do it to a whole unit. Or so the bastard thought.

Max knew this was far more ambitious than the failed DNA lab attempt or than when she rescued Zack, Logan and Brin. This was pulling off a reoccurrence Manticore had been guarding against for twelve years.

She stood as footsteps neared her cell and there were two quiet thuds. Gem was the most straight of all the unit's X5's so she was the one Max said that she would trust.

Gem opened the door. "We are committed…"

"Thanks" Max said and shook her head when the other X5 held out the weapon. "I don't do guns"

"Why not?" Gem asked bluntly.

"Just a rule and besides we need to be able to bluff in case we run into any guards" Max really didn't want to get into Eva. So far she hadn't seen a single ugly black bird and she wasn't going to invite disaster. "Let's go get Logan and then the others"

Gem nodded sharply. Any normal person might ask why she and Logan wanted to rescue a psychotic X5 serial killer or a new inductee to the hell that was Manticore. Max and Logan were in different cell sections, she was in solitary- he was in isolation. When they got to the isolation cells, Gem took out the guards without a moment's pause.

Picking the keys off the guard, Max stared at them and put the correct key into the cell door. It opened.

"Hey- Logan!" Max raised her voice slightly when he didn't answer. "Are you… can you-?"

Her voice cut through the soldier's and brought him back. Logan nodded and stood. He felt really distant. It wasn't that he had killed; it was more that he could almost justify it to himself and that sickened Logan more than anything else. "Max… I" he swallowed.

Max looked at him closely. "What did you do?"

"The only person I compromised was myself" Logan said and moved out of the cell. He wanted to never tell her- but he had to. But now was not the time for trying to sort out his mind. Right now he had to focus on the escape and nothing else. His legs had come with a horrific price tag- it was time to prove it was worth it or at least make it so he could live with himself after tonight.

She didn't push it. They moved into the medical division and Gem handed her the vial and a keycard. "Took a lot, that's the drug you need- I'll go and get the agent with Logan… you'll get it that I don't want to-"

"Noted" Max said, as she used the Manticore keycard to get into the laboratory.

The technician who had been taking notes at a computer jumped up and his hand reached for the alarm and Max intercepted it. "You don't want me to break it do you?" Max gave a grim smile as the technician nodded really fast. "Good boy, now I want you to turn off the bugs in his body"

"They… they are the only thing keeping him sane, it's fixing his brain"

Max shook her vial. "I have a tide me over, now do it or you are going to really wish you had been able to save this arm… insanity runs in the family and those teeth are just so white"

She deactivated the alarm and watched the technician get the small scanner device ready. Max wanted so badly to just hold Ben. His death had haunted her since that day and she never would have snapped his neck if she had known what Manticore could do. There was something wrong with Ben's mind but it could be managed like their seizures. Ben's eyes were so full of pain and hope and Max didn't want to think of what they had put her broken big brother through.

Once the nanites had been deactivated, Max made the technician back into the wall. "They will just pass out of the system, please don't kill me!"

"I'm not going to. I am destroying your research in here, I did my homework and it turns out without these files and notes it's going to be years before you can pick this up again"

"Don't… they can help-"

Max leaned in so her face was right in the technician's whose badge said Jorge Matthews. He was young, probably still bought the company line about this being for the greater good and all. He would lose that naiveté or die. "Help tear a kid's body apart? Because of those little metal bugs my sister handed herself to her death" She knocked Matthews out, and went over to Ben. Max injected the anti-psychotic first, and took out the gag as she begun undoing his restraints.

"Kill me Maxie; don't let them take me away… I killed all those people, I couldn't stop… I tried so hard… I'm just a mistake"

"I didn't mean that, you aren't a mistake Ben, you're just lost" Max removed the straps that held his arms down and hugged him. He was holding onto her just as tightly. "You can change Ben- you don't have to keep fighting yourself, you can get better"

Ben nodded and Max pulled away as she started to destroy the research. "Lydecker… he said I wasn't real… I was just a copy- that I wasn't strong enough"

Max paused. "Not real, how?"

* * *

"Get away from me you freaks"

Gem didn't look very happy about saving the special agent and Logan knew what she was stopping herself from saying. Was saving Ames White really worth the trouble? They had cut it close enough that the needle had been inches from his arm when they smashed into the room after disabling the surveillance and alarms. And they had fought off the guards in the room and had stopped the Psy Ops technician as well as freeing him.

Gem snorted. "Look at yourself, would you call that ordinary White? You have a barcode, just like us"

White had ripped out part of the metal chair and was threatening to brain them with it. Logan held up a hand to guard against that. "I know right now you have no reason to trust anyone- you were taken here against your will and they made you into something you weren't meant to be" The blunt weapon was lowered slightly and Logan took half a step forward. "But you are what you are now and the only way you can get home is to come with us"

The former NSA agent looked at him. "Why would you help me?"

"Because you are a person as much as I am and as much as Gem is" Logan gave a pointed look to where Gem was standing look out and he held out a gun to White. "And I think this would be easier to hold"

White dropped his blunt object and took the gun forcefully but didn't bring it up against Logan. "That twisted prick kept going on about how he was going to make me kill my wife and son- can we find him and kill him… slowly, please"

Gem was reexamining her choice of going with Logan over Max because White seemed a great deal more unbalanced than 493.

* * *

The vehicle they had commandeered for this was a retrofitted former prison bus. Alec had found Zane and Vada's suggestion of snatching a tank far more amusing than Zack had. In any case this vehicle had been repainted black and the windows were now sealed up and they were bulletproof. The windows were one way mirrors, they could see out but no one could see in.

"The satellite pictures show the X7's have just all went still, looks like they're not going to screw us" Krit said cynically.

Zack nodded. "We have five minutes, note the positions- take them all out and any guards you run across. If we miss even one of these things they'll signal back to base- let's move out"

The plan was to eliminate the X7 guards and if this had been a trap, the X7's would have been moving in on them. There was not a chance Lydecker would risk letting them escape if Manticore had been tipped.

Rae stared at the computer morosely. "Wish I could help you guys" The computer was set up to monitor everything by satellite. The extended link up was dangerous but it was the only way to monitor the situation as it happened- deployments and all.

"Hey, we all wish we could be waiting back here" Vada said as she moved out and along the perimeter.

Alec was close behind her as they came across the first set of X7s. "She could stroke out at any time, why hasn't she tried-"

Vada leaped over the fence and snapped the two X7's necks in quick succession. "They have to look like kids… do I have to do everything" As they moved through, moving down the rocky surface of the rock wall, she sighed. "Smart Aleck, when you're out here- death, anything is better than losing yourself and you'll pick up on that quickly" She refrained from telling him any member of his unit that was captured in this escape would show him why. It would be hard enough to face without getting told.

* * *

Standing in the shadows, Zack could see through the window Max sending her signal. Moment of weakness- this went beyond that. He knew that this made the strategic sense and every military reason and every reason as a soldier why the mission was necessary. But he didn't want to lose anyone tonight and Zack knew he would. In any campaign, losses were to be expected. But real soldiers weren't family like they were. He kneeled down and lined up his scope and checked the eight sentries and across the other side, he could see Syl send the ready signal. It was too late to end this now and the bullets came out, like coughs from the silencers. Manticore depended too highly on its X7 patrols to keep its facilities secure and Zack intended to exploit their error in judgment.

* * *

The room was some type of meeting room and Max recognized the design from the files McGinnis had gave her. This was where Command and its master the Committee met to decide everything about their lives. And it did have a nice large window.

She counted down the seconds in her mind and looked at the unit around her. They were all waiting to follow her lead and the others out of there.

A hand held onto hers and Max turned and looked at Logan. It was time.

As Max signaled, Logan readied himself and looked at White who seemed to have taken the fact he could leap down several stories of the building without harm easily. Better than not being able to kill Lydecker- Logan quashed the doubts as Max counted down.

Three, then two… and NOW!

Everyone smashed through the window pretty much instantly. Biggs could see Quinn and Eris hesitate for a microsecond and then followed straight after them. They hit the ground on their feet and ran straight for the woods, splitting up.

Max was holding onto Ben's arm as they slipped out of sight, Logan and White right behind them. And then the alarms all went off at once.

Twelve years ago, she hadn't been aware of the stakes. Max was very aware of every movement she made now, the way the twigs snapped under her boots, that she knew what she was getting out of here for this time.

Logan had gone a different route and she wanted nothing more than to stay with him. But she had to get them to the perimeter and one big group was easier to find. Ben looked as terrified now, as he had back then.

"You should leave me here… I don't want to be a nomilie Max… hurt people anymore"

Max stopped for a moment, aware that they were ankle deep in a puddle of water. "You're not…okay and we are getting-"

A movement, footsteps coming splashing towards them.

Max stood in front of Ben protectively and raised her fists as the person came into view. "Asha…?"

The first time Max had met Asha Barlowe was rescuing her from custody after word on the informant net came through that she had been taken by the Sector Cops. It was still burned into her brain the image of Asha on the bald guy's back threatening to 'kick his ass'… Max didn't know this Asha. Her blonde bangs were clipped out of her line of sight and the gun she held was in a practiced, learned way.

"Hey Max" Asha met her gaze. "It's a long story… so let's discuss it on the way home" she was looking with shock at Ben as they all moved forward "I just left Alec a moment ago and Ben's dead…"

How did Asha know about Ben? Max looked at Asha and saw that look on her face. It was the look she had remembered from her sister every time in Live Ordinance Drill and it was the look from the escape in '09. "Well this is Ben and he's alive Jondy, and yeah, we have a lot to talk about"

Max brushed past her sister and continued her progress onwards. Ben offered Asha a friendly smile and she had to force the smile in return. Max might never forgive the lie and that hurt a lot more than she thought it could.

* * *

"Hitting the switch!"

Syl's warning made them all go down. The claymores had been set in the tree line, just waiting for the pursuing TACs. The explosion was not huge, but it did what it needed to- sending the soldiers flying. Parts of them at least.

Logan didn't feel much for their passing. And it wasn't just the situation or trying to pull White away from riddling the soldiers with bullets so they could move out of there. But soul searching right now would get them killed. They were still taking fire, and Logan found it hard to move very fast with White fighting him the whole way. Ames White was no soldier and his temper made Zack look tranquil.

He threw his body on White to pull him down as a powerful searchlight shone through the woods. "Stay still" Logan whispered.

"You should know I'm not a fan of Eyes Only"

Logan looked at him. "You should know to be quiet" He wasn't going to get into this kind of debate with the former special agent.

There was some shouting and an object landed inches from their faces. Both men leaped up and ran as the grenade exploded. Logan found himself tumbling down a ledge and hitting the ground with his front.

He saw something in the edge of his vision and smiled, taking the hand up. "Thanks" Alec nodded and a form collided with him.

Cece held onto Alec.

"You idiot… see what you've done" The way Biggs spoke was not spiteful, more affectionate. "We're all traitors now" Logan tried to find where White had fallen but he couldn't see him. He must have still been up on the ledge.

Logan leaped up and held onto the edge as he pulled himself over onto steady ground. White had been caught in the explosion and a large branch had pinned him down in between rocks. The soldiers ahead were starting to move forward and Logan ran to the branch and struggled to push it off. The angle pining White in would take a forklift but Logan wasn't going to give up on White. The only reason Special Agent White had been pulled into any of this was because of him… Vertes had been his mistake. Other people shouldn't be paying the price for it.

The hand free of the position grabbed Logan by the collar. "You" White growled. "Go… heroes get killed- you get out of here and hide my family where that sadist can't find them…get out here or I'll kill you"

He let go and Logan stumbled back.

* * *

Syl slung the sniper rifle over her back and started to move away, Manticore fading out from sight. The Blue Lady had to be paying her back for something- the last mission with Manticore had been enough of a bad memory trip. She turned and saw Max coming. Funny, Max had been with Ben not five minutes ago and had been headed on a different path and then Syl saw the guns coming up and she jumped into the brush to dodge the bullets.

"I was almost tempted to let slip the surprise" 453 said and dodged. Bullets hit right where she had been standing. "Hiding, predictable… but handing you all in doesn't get me 452"

Holstering the guns with a fluidic motion, 453 caught Syl by the arms, removing the weapon from the rogue X5 and keeping hers tucked away. Never let the weapons fall into the hands of the enemy. "I don't care about your escape plans and you can all get away for all I care… I do care about 452… where is she?"

Head butting the clone, Syl flipped her finger at 453.

"I have twelve years of training on you" 453 drove Syl to the ground and drove her foot into her back causing a sharp crack. "I think I just broke your spine" She pulled Syl by her hair and held her Manticore issue blade to her throat. "Last chance..."

Syl spat blood in 453's face and laughed. "You know, you are a bitch-"

* * *

He didn't want to make Biggs suffer… he didn't. But every time Alec went to open his mouth as he, Biggs, Cece and Logan made their way to the rally point, all he could think about was how Biggs had lied… how he had put Rachel's life on the line.

"Sorry 'bout your new friend Logan" Cece said.

Logan snorted quietly as he glanced behind them towards the sounds of gunfire and the shouting back towards Manticore. "No you're not…it's okay, it's easier to like the people you save who don't call you a freak"

Gem hadn't had to tell the others that- White had made his opinion loud and clear. But leaving him behind, even as a last resort- Logan knew that no matter what this night would be nothing but a bad memory in the future.

A cry that came from the right made them all look up. "That's Kiron… come on" Cece and Logan moved to go assist him- their guns drawn.

Alec sighed and caught his brother's eye and gave a small nod and Biggs took the gesture.

"I love you" Biggs said batting his eyelashes.

"Don't push it- my gun has jealousy issues"

* * *

Lydecker moved forwards, the activity of the staff working hard to make up the ground the rogue X5s had gained. This was anything but not planned. Whichever guards and trainers missed the actions were not going to get warning on their dismissal.

His kids were all out here tonight and if they were recaptured in a small way he would be disappointed with them. But Lydecker was not going to let them pull this a second time.

"Sir… we have two recaptured, and one critically wounded"

The stretcher moved past and Lydecker stared at Syl's prone form. "Send her to the infirmary, until there is confirmation everything is to be done to save her life" Even Lydecker realized the words were hollow; the deep cut to the throat was a testament to that. If the two units were working together, that only left a normal soldier- but how had a normal soldier gotten close enough to hurt one of his kids?

* * *

Gem fired the last of her bullets into the three soldiers who had their guns raised on 471, no his name was Krit.

"Never thought I'd save an 09'ner"

Krit put a hand to his stomach and groaned as he pulled it away. "I think you're too late…" he rested on the log. The bullet hadn't hit anything at first but it was still in there and causing damage as it moved. "Watch out!"

She thrust her elbow into the first soldier's face as the second used his rifle to strike across the back of her head.

* * *

It just took one bullet.

The things that Alec would do to turn back time, number one turn himself in, number two instead of taking orders- snapping Sandoval's neck, number three… orders and rules had made sense in his life once upon a time. Before Rachel that was, before he realized that protecting his unit meant more than Command. Turn back the clock, so he wasn't struggling to move forwards, holding his dying brother and best friend.

_Until the gun came into sight, she looked exactly like Max. But there was something in her eyes that defied that description._

_Biggs just stood there for a moment and Alec saw the look of mild surprise as he fell backwards._

Alec couldn't go on. He fell to his knees and his brother looked up at him. "Come on… no crying, I screwed you… so don't…" He coughed violently.

"Don't give in you moron, come on… it's just a flesh wound" It had to be, it had to be just a flesh wound. Biggs- the hole in his chest, that was just his head, it was all in his head. Biggs was going to be fine. "I like Titanic… hold on to that… make fun of me, just don't kick the bucket on me!"

_For the first time, Brin's presence had not been unwanted. She had disarmed 453 and they were circling each other. "Go" Brin yelled at him, the pity in her eyes- Alec hated her for it. It made it real. _

Biggs smiled in a shadow of his usual attitude. "I never should have lied to you… should have screwed up their search, you have no idea how sorry I am Alec"

"I know and I-" His brother had gone still and Alec felt his insides turn into ice. "I should have explained it to you… I shouldn't have just walked away, I didn't understand how much you needed me to do that" His words were empty, Biggs couldn't hear them and his brother was dead in his arms. 453 was a product of Manticore- the brainwashing- their perfect weapon. And Alec knew he'd die before he let them turn him back into that.

* * *

It scared Brin how easy it was to hit her sister's clone. There were dark places inside of her where Manticore and X5 734 still held power on her. But she swallowed it…453 hadn't shown a moment's hesitation in shooting Biggs.

"You didn't have to kill him- Lydecker's going to have your head" Brin spat as they pushed away from each other.

453 smirked and it made her look less like Max somehow. Like all Manticore's cold cruelty reigned in that smile. "You don't get it… I don't care- 452 ruined my life, so I am going to ruin hers and if I have to kill to get to her then so be it"

She charged forward and caught Brin by the throat and got them down on the ground.

Brin wasn't afraid to die. "So what you blame Max for what Manticore does to you, that's on Manticore"

"On my last assignment, I was deep cover, two years- industrial espionage… now there was this family I got… that I got attached to that they would have left well enough alone but because of 452 being well, 452- the Colonel's figures that out and has them executed… by me… because of her I killed the only thing outside of Manticore that I…"453 tightened her grip but Brin had her hand around her throat as well.

Standing, Brin held 453 up, backing her against a tree. "You did that! Manticore only goes so far, if you care and you still go back you are just as responsible as they are" 453 disgusted her- Ben hadn't been able to help himself but 453- she chose to be this way… she chose to be the killer.

"I'm glad I killed 701… you think 'Max' will cry… I hope she-"

Brin snapped 453's neck and took out her guns. She shot the dead X5 in the head twice, once from each gun. From behind her, Zane emerged and stared at the dead copy of Max. "It's not her" Brin said. There was something in her voice that was cold and almost clinical. "We have to go"

* * *

Déjà vu. That was all Max could think about as she stood by the prison bus. She had been here before twice. The first was waiting for Jondy to emerge. Max looked over at Asha. Her sister was talking intently with an X5 from Unit 5. He couldn't be more than sixteen, seventeen. From what she could overhear- she was good at calming his fears. She saw Brin and Zane emerge from the fence, Zane holding onto Alec's arm.

Alec looked like somebody had just shot him in the chest. Somehow it was easier to be angry with Asha over the lies and deceit than him. Max didn't know why- Jondy had been the one helping her out… even if it was just as a friend.

Alec was the one who had been hunting her down, killed a dear friend and playing with Logan's head. And to top it all off- if not for some experiment, he would have been her brother and not Ben. But keeping the head in the game aside, Max knew that this wasn't the time to say anything. Because she knew that look. If there had been a mirror, Max knew that was how her face would have looked after seeing Tinga suspended in that extraction chamber.

Everyone raised weapons again and this time Zack appeared, followed by Eris, another member of Alec's unit. The weapons went down.

Zack stood next to her. "Manticore's forces are getting their act together… we have five minutes before we have to get out of here- what's our headcount?"

Vic looked around. "We are half a unit short… anyone seen Quinn or Lita?"

"I saw Gem and one of theirs" Skittles said, speaking up. "471- just before I crossed the stream- there was no way to get to them, he looked pretty bad"

"That's not your fault" Zane said but he looked worried as he stared down past the fence and rocky ledge. "Krit's good at getting out of tight spots but with Syl…" He could feel his family staring at him now and everyone knew what he hadn't said.

Max saw movement in the trees. She could see Cece and the other guy but all that mattered was that Logan was with them. Sharp relief filled her and Max couldn't help despite how much she just wanted to break down, the smile that spread across her face. The second he made it onto the ledge she held him tightly.

Logan moved away from Max after a few seconds and he looked at Zack. "The response teams are a minute behind us…there's no one else"

Zack nodded sharply and everyone started to pull in as Vic helped Brin arm the last of the mines. Alec sat down on a seat heavily and he felt someone sit next to him. He looked into his mirror image. Of all the times Alec had hated Ben throughout his life for Psy Ops, he couldn't hate his twin now or bring himself to tell him to get away.

A hand clasped his shoulder and Alec looked at his twin. "He'll go to the good place, where all good soldiers go"

"The good place?" There were a thousand references to Ben's psychotic state that had come to mind but Alec held them all back. Because for all his insanity- Ben's fantasies were something that made him younger and more vulnerable. Alec could only imagine how much Lydecker had tried to twist it around on him- drive him all the more insane. If anyone was crazy it was Lydecker.

There was a rumbling as the engine came on and the former prison bus tore away from Manticore, driving as fast as it could around the twisting side road.

Logan took over from Rae, and sat down, holding onto the bolted down computer's desk as they swerved around a corner. He hacked into the radio bandwidth and searched until he found the right frequency and channel.

"… it's not too later to surrender. You can't hope to get away…"

Zane stuck his hand up. "Does that creep have any idea that we are getting away?" His flippant tone had an undercurrent of venom in it.

"Unit Five- your violation of Command aside, return now and I will allow after reprogramming for you to retain your unit's structure"

"He created 453" Alec said his voice shaking. "Biggs is dead and so is your sister Syl because of that. He is just as culpable for their deaths and everyone else… Logan, turn it off"

Cece stood up and walked towards the radio as Zack held her back. "Just let me tell him to jump off a cliff, let me threaten to rip out his spine, 599… Zack, he killed my best friend" Alec made a motion to get up but Zack held up a hand. It had to be him.

"He killed mine twelve years ago" Zack shook his head and Alec sat back down. "Eva, never let me pull the CO card in Manticore and she was the best second in command- she was my sister and I thought if we just got Max to Lydecker that he would help and that was my worst moment of weakness"

He had never forgiven himself for thinking that Jack had just died. That the guards, everyone else was the enemy but Lydecker was some paragon he could trust. That he would save Max and while everyone else had been blinded by the light… everyone else missed the split microsecond that Eva started to move the gun down. "The best thing you can do for your brother now is to never forget the one lesson that will keep you alive out here, you can never trust him"

Logan had turned it off, and felt the sharp pain he had felt the day his mother had died. Right now he couldn't think about Biggs being dead. It hurt too much in a way Logan never thought it could.

* * *

Lydecker kept a fast pace towards the infirmary and the TAC commander had to speed up his stride to keep up. "We have five wounded and two killed… the problem was getting close enough to subdue"

"I don't want excuses- I'm ordering a full review" He didn't say another word. This never should have happened again. He opened the doors. The full staff on site was working to a high degree of efficiency. Lydecker walked to the corner where he could see Syl. The wires were still attached but the monitor was switched off.

A doctor was quiet by his side and Lydecker forced himself to detach. She was dead but indecision could cost him far more than just her. "Do it- every moment of delay decreases our chances of survival with 846 and 471"

He had to look at Syl now; her eyes were fixed and open. He closed them slowly and moved away to the next curtain.

"I like 452 better… she ain't crazy" Lydecker turned to look at 297, almost dispassionately. There was multiple organ penetration- a complete waste of what had once been an exemplarily soldier. "X5 453 killed your 09'ner… tried to get your favorite… we should have run when they did-"

It was only after the X5 died, that anger showed on Lydecker's face. This was a failure, absolutely and Lydecker was going to press the surveillance issues now. The Committee had been afraid that if every square inch was under surveillance- that much recording would be hard to keep under control. They wouldn't fight him now- it was obvious that if they had the complete control that watching every second of the soldiers gave them- an escape would have been impossible.

And the person responsible for X5 personality profiles was getting replaced. They had messed up on 453 and Lydecker was going to gain as much as he could from this utter failing. He moved past to the final open curtain just in time to see Vada spit on his training sergeant's face.

"Hiya Deck"

Lydecker watched the sergeant move away. "You will not cooperate"

Vada rolled her eyes, a trade off for her shoulder wound. "Duh… why would I want to… let's count now how many rogues are out in the world, maybe that'll replace counting sheep" She eyed the restraints. "You don't have to tie me up… I mean it's not like I tried to off myself rather than look at your face…oops I did"

"Trapped in here, while they leave you behind Vada…"

"Don't give me the betrayal card or even the pity one" Vada grinned. "You just lost another unit… no matter what you do to me- it was worth it"

And she could swear, just before Lydecker moved to leave there was a glimmer of pride in his eyes. Damn- what was that crybaby of Star Wars trying to off himself for? Some freak who breathed like a wood pigeon was definitely preferable to Lydecker.

She started at the ceiling and smiled. Even if there was no blue lady- Vada could swear Eva had been looking over them tonight.

* * *

_**Unknown Hospital, Vancouver**_

_**May 22nd, 2021**_

* * *

"It wasn't that it was a choice- it was that I could justify murdering Bronck in cold blood"

Max looked out onto the busy street below. This private hospital had been shut down for years and it had been an S1W safe haven for about as many years. It was good place to hide out and relocate from- she had to give Jondy that. "Like hell Logan, Bronck was a monster and if he had gone free he would have went after Matt and his family. We all do things we regret, especially where Lydecker is concerned"

"I know, it's just for a moment I forgot my name" Logan looked at the old broken wheelchair in the corner. "It's never going to go away is it- Manticore… you don't get over it"

"No, you don't but you don't let it rule your life" Max said and she looked at him. "Did you have any idea about Asha being-?"

Logan shook his head. "I would have told you Max… I know how much your family means to you, even back then- I knew that you were more interested in me finding her than anyone else"

Max joined him sitting on the end of the hospital bed. "She's not a fashion designer or an architect like in my made up version of her life but I could have accepted the fact she's more like you but she lied to me and she did it so well I don't know if I ever could trust her again"

"Maybe not" Alec was standing in the doorframe. "Sorry – I was looking for you to say goodbye but I listened in… Biggs died and I never got a chance to really make things right with him, don't screw this up Max. I know what it's like to feel like that believe me but the last thing you want is to miss out on a chance to make things right"

"Aren't you a smart Aleck" Max regarded him. "Why didn't you tell me about the thing with Ben and you?"

Alec went to leave. "Max- Ben's your brother… you don't have to pretend to like me or anything"

"I can't have two brothers?" Max had her answer now to why Lydecker had wanted Rachel Berrisford badly enough to go against the rescinding order signed off by Renfro with Committee approval. Alec gave his trademark smirk, in response. It would take time for them to have a relationship beyond the hunting and running… so much had been done and said on both sides "I'll see you round Max"

* * *

Max has left moments ago to go talk to her sister, and Logan noticed Zack entering the room. "Should I be concerned?" Zack asked bluntly and Logan realized he had been digging his nonexistent fingernail into the back of his neck trying to scratch the barcode off.

"No" Logan said. "I know it'll come back but after this I'm going to get it removed for awhile- how is the unit?"

Zack didn't push about the barcode further. "Following my lead- I almost forgot what it was like to have the people under me defer to my experience and to obey my orders… I should be grateful that you and Max are going to stay away from Seattle"

Logan looked at him. "After tonight… I'd never do anything like go back to Seattle and I don't think Max would either"

"I'm sorry about Biggs, I know that despite what I told you to do, you were attached to him" Zack said, sounding like he understood far too well. "I know I had to let this happen, even if you and Max hadn't been captured- our numbers were wearing down- it was only a matter of time before they brought us all in and we have held it back now"

Zack didn't want pity or for someone to validate his command choices, Logan knew that. This was just Zack validating the only choice he could have made for his own peace of mind.

Logan nodded. "The informant net should be able to prevent Lydecker from gaining the element of surprise ever again- whatever it takes"

He understood Max's fears now. Zack knew why he fought with Logan before this so much. For their different objectives and everything- they were very similar. "Good- you and Max are going to Colorado Springs" It wasn't in Zack to tell Logan to never let go of his emotions but it was in him to change his game plan. He had intended to get Logan to leave without Max and keep them both safe-apart. But chances were they'd do everything in their power including risking their freedom just to find each other again. That was how Zack justified keeping them together- it wasn't for the sentimentality. It wasn't.

* * *

Cece was holding her hair up and trying to line up the scissors with the right angle when Brin came into the bathroom.

"Some kind of statement?"

"They made me keep this long- so I was prettier for missions…everyone else was so happy when we could grow our hair… I hated it- it's all coming off"

Brin nodded once and came over holding her hand out. "Let me" Cece slowly released the scissors and the Korean X5 took Cece's hair out and started cutting it slowly, being careful not to accidentally stick into the back of her neck.

Sighing, Cece looked at the mirror to Brin. "Sorry about the drone comments"

"It's okay, I was a mindless Colonel's pet" Brin paused for a second. "You must be worried about the members of your unit you left behind"

"I am- but we've been able to reunite with the other part of our family- so it all adds up" Brin felt more at ease now. It wasn't just getting Ben, Max and Logan out that made this night- it was getting this unit out as well. At least there was one unit that had been in Manticore and could see beyond the brainwashing. The conditioning that made them hate anyone who went against Command. Maybe there was hope for every transgenic trapped in Manticore.

And hope that she could one day defeat 734 once and for all- and just be Brin.

* * *

"Jondy… Asha wait"

Asha turned around and almost ran anyway. She didn't want to have this conversation with Max now and she wasn't sure if she ever did. But she still waited.

Max had only one question. "Why?"

"Because I always end up alone Max" Asha looked at the ground rather than look at Max and even when she looked back up – she was looking into space and not her sister. "I got the family we escaped for and then they were gone…like it's the Blue Lady punishing me or something for leaving you behind in the ice"

"It wasn't your fault- Lydecker and his soldiers were right behind us, if you had stayed we both would have been caught- in any case I didn't want you to get captured on my account Jondy- I never blamed you"

Asha shook her head. "You should, everyone I love gets hurt in the end, like I'm sort of disease that destroys everything around me, I have to be alone, that way nobody else goes away" She backed away and walked towards the road. "Good bye Max"

Max caught up to her. "You don't have to be alone Jondy- none of us, we're human, you can't live your life this way, it will just catch up to you one day" She could see Asha pause and Max held onto her hand for the longest moment. Like in the escape of '09. Then Asha broke away.

And Max knew she had to let her sister go. Just like last time.

* * *

_**To Be Continued…**_

* * *

… for the last time.


	22. Damaged

Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Angel- FOX network does. I did not create Dark Angel- that was James Cameron and Charles Eglee. This is the final chapter of Damaged, and does a bit of a fast forward here. Thank you to everyone who read and reviewed and I also have something to say after this.

Let's do it.

* * *

**Chapter Twenty Two**

**Damaged**

* * *

_**Montgomery, Alabama **_

_**September, 2024**_

* * *

It seemed like it happened to somebody else. Like it had been a story he had heard.

Logan was sitting by the computers. Even though Logan had had the new set up for going on three years, it still felt like it was out of place. Like one day he would wake up and be back in Seattle, Max walking through the door demanding to be fed and the last few years being a particularly vivid dream or nightmare.

That was how Logan felt on the good days, on the bad ones it felt like he could wake up back in Manticore… like today.

But then after what had happened last night, Logan felt like at least back there he wouldn't feel as sick to his stomach as he did now.

"_That barcode- it's put there to keep track of you… like a brand" Logan hated how the barcode on the back of his neck made him feel every single day. It made him feel like he wasn't a real person… that Manticore would always find a way to control his life. Control Max's. "So when she sees someone like you, eager to be a slave- wearing it, it kills her inside"_

_And here he was, driving her back to Marrow/ X1 098, the transhuman Lydecker was using to get people who were the most vulnerable, the ones with the all too important right blood type to want to be special. So much so like Rain, they gave their freedom away. "The moment you walk back into that church, you are signing your freedom away"_

_Rain was still convulsing and she looked at him. "What's so special about being normal? You're special"_

"_Being normal, is something you can't appreciate until it's gone… but then what would I know- I'm just the idiot who thought he could talk you out of this"_

_She didn't reply, but pointed to where he should pull up and Logan stopped the car alongside the pavement. "Good luck" he said as Rain reached for the door handle. "You're going to need it"_

_Logan had waited outside that old, dingy church for hours waiting and hoping that Rain would change her mind. Eventually he had left and been halfway back to the apartment when his cell had rung._

_Logan turned the car in a one eighty back the direction he had come from. Rain's friend- Lida, the one who had tipped them off that her friend was in a cult and about Marrow, called to say Rain had called her- all the others except for a guy 'Push' were gone… and she had found the bodies. Lida had called Max, who had called him._

_It was typical operating procedure every time Marrow was in a city. Start a group high on his 'special' blood until he drew viable subjects in and terminate everyone but the subjects and hold them until they were retrieved by Manticore and start over. _

_He just hoped he could save this pair in time._

_When Logan arrived back at the church, he walked straight in through the front arch doors. From the altar, Marrow stood, Rain and Push were sitting in the pews- Push going through withdrawal. Manticore wouldn't want their subjects running away on them. _

"_I told you and the X5 not to come back and I have the back up to make good on my threat" From behind the church altar, the curtains moved and Logan froze in place, scarcely believing his eyes._

"_Biggs?"_

_Biggs didn't react to his name, in fact the look in his eyes that Logan should have recognized from the first moment was now all too clear. 846 was the one who was alive and he was one of 'them'. Logan could save himself but then Marrow would be able to take Rain and Push in…_

_846 finally spoke, with none of the humor or anything that sounded like it could be Biggs. "X9 208- you will surrender into custody-"_

"_No, I won't" Logan said quickly, trying to figure out a way to take 846 down quickly before Marrow turned his attention back on him. _

_The old wooden arch doors broke as Max drove through them and drove her motorcycle into Marrow sending him into the cross. It broke and sent him to the ground. 846 went to attack Max when Logan ran up next to the altar, using a candle stand against his back like a bat._

Logan grimaced, his entire face felt swollen. They had managed to beat 846… Max had even gotten Marrow to impale himself, putting an end to Lydecker's latest approach and Rain and Push were now on their way to the Mexican border, ready to forget that they had even heard the word 'transgenic'.

It didn't change that fact that Biggs was alive even if it was a mockery of living and all Logan could think of was finding him again and finding some way that could reach the real Biggs.

Alec felt the same way. Logan knew that if Zack ever found out that they stayed in contact, Max wouldn't be the only one without the contact number. Zack had given Max a number that had been set up just for her. He didn't trust her not to try and track down the others.

Not that Zack knew about the second number that had been set up by Brin and Kiron- it wasn't as if anyone abused it, it was about being able to talk sometimes… even if they all had to stay apart.

In fact Alec and Ben talked frequently and it was helping Ben to get better, to have someone who was always willing to listen when he had bad days.

Logan brought his attention back to the open file on the boarding school in Seattle that was really just a front for a sweatshop- poor parents who thought they were sending their kids to a better life, when all they were really sending their children to was being worked to death. It was something he had to do but as he looked at the clock he realized it there was still five minutes to go until the broadcast.

He looked at the glasses that rested by his left hand and he twisted the ring. Logan rarely took it off, it had been surprising Max had even agreed to it knowing her opinion on the idea of being married- but then their 'declaration of intent' was one they both planned to stick to- it was only Manticore that would get in the way. Logan only ever took his ring off when he knew there was a chance he could lose it in a fight… or have it taken and melted down by Lydecker- his reaction to it… Zack with his apathetic view of it was like the inevitable was better in comparison.

Logan saw the clock tick over on the computer and sent his request through the server, and it connected quickly though several countries and then states, then finally connected through to Seattle.

"Do not attempt to adjust your set; this is a Streaming Freedom Video Bulletin. The cable hack will last exactly sixty seconds. It cannot be traced, it cannot be stopped, and it is the only free voice left in this city-" The broadcast was prerecorded, as much as Logan wanted to do it live, live was far easier for Manticore to track down.

That and Max was talking to Case. Logan got up and went to go see what was wrong. Last year Charlie Smith had sworn up and down he had seen Tinga- and in a way he had. An X7 clone of her, aged artificially.

It had been a trick by Lydecker to try and take Case that had ended tragically when Charlie had been killed. Rather than save his own life as he was held hostage at his son's school, Charlie had told them it was a trap, despite the fact Charlie Smith must have known it would cost him his own life. Even Zack had gruffly admitted that Charlie had been alright, starting a discussion on what it took Zack to accept an ordinary being involved with any of them.

Max smiled apologetically as Logan came out. "Bad dreams"

"The evil king always takes Mommy and Daddy away" Case said, looking embarrassed. "And I get scared when I wake up- I'm a big baby"

"No you aren't" Logan said. "Come on, Max and I will sit with you until you fall asleep"

* * *

Max watched as Logan led Case back to his room. She found it amazing that he was good with children, especially in the wake of what had happened in Manticore. But he was really good with Case and she remembered Logan had lost his parents much older than Case was, but it didn't seem to matter that much how old a person was, as a teenager or a small kid. It still hurt.

But there was a part of Logan that would never get over the deaths of his parents or what had happened in Manticore. He was just as messed up as she was. Logan had changed beyond any hope of being the man she had first met, breaking in to rob.

But it was the same part that never gave in, no matter the odds.

She walked out to the computer set up and started to shut everything down. There was really no point in leaving the connection up- it should be fine but she didn't want to risk Lydecker ever figuring out how to trace it.

Finally the only thing on the computer screen's reflection was her and Max found the black cat suit didn't seem to suit her as much as it used to. That and Alec had taken a few well meaning cracks about it when they had teamed up to swipe the baseball last month. Something about Max not having the figure for it.

It was great that Alec and Logan talked, not so great the amount of sharing that went on at times. So much for guys having an inability to communicate but maybe whoever thought up that chestnut had only ever met Zack. So Alec had known she had just found out she was pregnant two months before hand… no one showed that early but Alec seemed to enjoy playing Captain Dick on occasion.

But his joking did help alleviate her own fears a little- between her genetics and what had been done to Logan's, there was always a chance that there could be something wrong down the road. At least for now the baby or rather the weird shape was growing the way it should be. And for now that had to be enough.

She was closer to Alec than she had been before- and not just because of the brother and sister thing. Alec was constantly worrying about Rachel and the danger he put her in- something Max could relate to all too well. But Rachel Berrisford seemed to soften Alec; to the degree he was far from the impeccable, perfect soldier who had been trying to retrieve her for Manticore.

It was no wonder Lydecker had wanted her so badly- the one person who could get Alec to open his eyes to the truth and he had ended up sparking another escape through his unit.

It just went to prove the more Lydecker tried to rip the humanity out of them, with mind games, Psy Ops, taking away the people they cared about- the more human they all became no matter how damaged they all were.

Asha… Max knew that Jondy had found her mother, Margaret Curran, not that she had spoken much to her or spent time with Jondy since that night. Their lives had changed too much for them ever to be in the other's life the way she had always fantasized about back when she was looking for the others. But they were still sisters, and that would have to be enough… Max was looking to the future, not holding onto the past.

Max opened the fridge and pulled out Case's water bottle and went back down the hall to his bedroom. Case had conned Logan into getting out one of his books and reading it to him. Max leaned on the doorway watching the scene.

_Happily ever now sounds like being cheated- for all Logan and I know, Lydecker could bust down that door tomorrow and take it all away. Maybe he never will and we'll get our happily ever after complete with growing old and gray… in that sappy kind of way._

_But I'm glad I have my strange little life with Logan- no matter what it brings._

* * *

_**-The End-**_

* * *

This fic first started out as a one shot idea- and I kept going, frustrated by the fact that there are pretty much less than ten, actual Logan as a soldier fics and I had been looking in what turned out to be in vain so I wrote what I couldn't find. And that brings me to my challenge to the reviewers, readers and so on.

Allison's Challenge: To write a fic of your own where Logan is caught at the end of Season One, instead of Max and is turned into a soldier by either Lydecker or Renfro (the method how is up to you) as either the primary or as a main character.

I hope at least one person takes this up and I will read and review any fics that are started as a result, just send me the story URL- and I will read and review it.

I am always going to love Dark Angel and as much as I had to post this, I also wanted to put it off. Because this is it, for fanfiction writing and that I miss Dark Angel and this is another point where I say good bye to it. I really hope one day we get that movie and I really hope one day all the idiot M/A shippers who bash Logan grow up and we can be a whole fandom again.

My username will be changing in the next week to '**Replica Velocity a.k.a. X5 714**'

Thanks,

Allison.


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